Hot Artist Kim Jonghyun was seen in a bar with Newcomer Singer Haseul?

Minki sighs. Another day, another news. He doesn't need to open the news to know its content, because he already knows without reading it. Dating news, of course. It is Jonghyun's 7th dating news this month, his newest record so far.

"What are you doing?"

Minki looks at the person who already took a seat beside him with two glass of coffee in his hands. After looking at Minki's sullen face, Minhyun—his manager, gives him a knowing look.

"It's Jonghyun again, isn't it?" Minhyun said while giving him a glass of coffee. Minki accepts the coffee and turns his head away to any directions but Minhyun.

"Who is it now? y soloist Hyuna? Pure noona Yoona? Cute little brother Lucas?"

"Can you just shut up?" Minki snapped, suddenly remembers earlier news about Jonghyun before the Haseul one. The Hyuna news is one of the news that he hates the most.

"You know I can't because you two have the same schedule this afternoon and I will never let you meet him with this sullen mood because it'll be a disaster," answered Minhyun with an exaggerated sigh. "So, spill."

Minki totally forgot that he has the same schedule with Jonghyun this afternoon. He shouldn't have checked the news outlet earlier. Minki lets out a heavy sigh, the rest of the day will be hard for him.

"I'll be okay. Just give me some time to calm my mind and finish this coffee, okay?"

"You never be okay after Jonghyun dating news," Minhyun stands up from his chair. "But okay, I'll leave you alone. But still, I never understand why you keep your... relationship with him? At first, it feels adorable, that you two still accept each other despite every scandals—but nowadays it's tiring. Everyone knows that every scandal is true and everyone starts to look at you two as a joke... What kind of game are you two playing, truthfully?"

"There's no game. We just... need each other," whispered Minki, like he's convincing himself.

"If you need each other, why are both of you playing with... other people? Creating scandals here and there?"

"You won't understand, Minhyun," snapped Minki. He's losing his patience and he is too tired to talk about this topic with Minhyun. Minhyun sighed and waves his hand lazily.

"Well, you're right. I will never understand, but remember that I care about you. Stop hurting yourself, everyone knows that you're suffering—so does Jonghyun. Your break is about to finish, see you in 10 minutes, okay?"

Minki just stays silent, because he doesn't know what to say.

Everyone knows that you're suffering—so does Jonghyun.

Well, maybe everyone knows.

But not himself.

--------------------------------

"Your news already out."

Jonghyun looks at his manager who just took a seat in the driver seat. Baekho gives him his phone, with a news opened in the browser. Jonghyun can see his photos—with Haseul, from yesterday clearly. The paparazzi is getting better, he thought.

Or it's him who's getting more obvious?

Well, he's been so obvious for the last 3 months after all.

"Is this the revenge for Minki and Roa's news 3 days ago?" Baekho asked while getting ready to drive their car. Jonghyun's next schedule is in 1 hour, which means Baekho needs to use his driving skills to get the place in time.

"Stop talking and get us to the place on time," answered Jonghyun harshly, he doesn't want to talk about Minki right now. He needs to see him on his next schedule, and he doesn't want to ruin their chemistry with this never ending topic.

"I just phoned Minhyun and he said Minki's in a bad mood too. You never make any scene right before you have the same schedule with Minki, so why now?"

"Didn't I tell you to stop talking?"

"Wow, rude JR. I'm so scared. You shouldn't be like this, Minki will hate you."

" off, Baekho. I'll get some sleep, wake me up when we arrived."

Minki will hate you.

Well, I'm sure he already hates me.

Like how I hate him.

So much.

-----------------

"How could you sleep in a time like this?"

Jonghyun opened his eyes and the first thing that he sees is a pair of beautiful eyes, looking straight to his sleepy, droopy eyes. He gets up from the sofa and looks at the clock, 10 minutes before their schedule.

"I didn't have enough sleep last night. I have Night Goblin filming," answered Jonghyun while yawning. Minki took a seat beside him and they both know they need some reassurance—to get their chemistry back, to make them okay, to be the perfect couple again.

Like always.

"How's your day?" Jonghyun asked innocently. When he doesn't get any answer form Minki, he looks at his beautiful partner and he understands. He perfectly understands when he sees Minki's hardened expression after hearing his questions.

So he doesn't ask or talk anymore— he kissed Minki hard until they're breathless. Trying to make a perfect image—trying to bring back the innocent and beautiful memories, trying to make Minki forget about everything, and trying to make himself forget too. Minki is, and will always be, his medicine—in every situation, in every scenario that they make. And he knows that he's Minki's medicine too.

That's why, whatever happens, they'll be alright.

Jonghyun starts to lower his kiss to Minki's neck when he felt Minki pushed his chest slowly, trying to stop him. Jonghyun complies, but he gives Minki an unreadable stare.

"We need to get ready... It's almost time," Minki said, still breathless, and Jonghyun sighs. Jonghyun stands up and straightens his clothes, he fixes his hair and leaves the room without saying anything.

Minki feels his chest tightened and his eyes are getting hot. He really wants to cry, to scream, to release his anger—to end everything. Minhyun's right, everyone knows that he's suffering—and he does too. And Jonghyun surely does too.

Minki lets out a tear slipped from his eyes—and he wipes it with anger. He should be angry, not crying. He tries to calm himself as possible as he can, and he leaves the room after he feels better.

A perfect couple—that's what Jonghyun and he should be.

A perfect couple with too many scandals.

A perfect couple with too much drama.

What a perfect couple, indeed.

---------------------------

Minki and Jonghyun were best friends before they turn into a so-called perfect couple.

They attend a same acting academy and they trained in the same agency. They almost debuted in a group with their manager—Baekho and Minhyun—with one more person, Aron, who's now turned into a dance trainer in their agency. Unfortunately their agency couldn't afford to debut a group, so they chose to make Minki and Jonghyun debut separately to be all-rounder artists; where Minhyun and Baekho focused to produce their songs and become their managers; and Aron focused to do their choreography and trains new trainees. Minki debuted with Ren as his stage name, and Jonghyun with JR. They attracted many people with their debut since they debuted on the same day and with unique concept—opposite attraction. Ren is a beautiful devil who's trying to convince people to make sins, and JR is a gentle angel who's trying to make people feel happy.

Everyone in their company knew that Minki and Jonghyun have a thing since day 1. They always practice, eat, sleep—heck, everything they did, they did it together. Some people saw them differently, but mostly didn't feel bothered because both Minki and Jonghyun never made any scenes and always so kind to everyone. When they debuted and many news outlets made their news about suspicious relationship between Minki and Jonghyun, the company didn't deny anything—and both Minki and Jonghyun didn't hide anything. They openly showed their closeness, in front of or behind the cameras, and the company kept giving them couple schedules. It couldn't be concluded that no one against their relationship, but fortunately, most people accepted them and even started to hype their relationship. They suddenly became a famous perfect couple, and their popularity reached its peak in no time. They had schedules everywhere, they did a duet concert tour together, they started their own reality shows—they successfully attracted so many attention in short span of time.

Ridiculous things started to happen after their 1 year debut anniversary.

They're still the perfect couple that every people adored—but some things started to happen. Jonghyun was seen having a date with other people. The very first news that came out was about Jonghyun's date with everyone's noona—Bada, to a cute café which was very famous for couples. The news made everyone shocked, it made everyone angry and threw a definite question: how could you do this to Minki?

But when everyone was still shocked with Jonghyun news, Minki made everyone more shocked with his kissing photos with a handsome model Kwon Hyunbin in a car.

Every news outlet talked about them. 'Is the perfect couple broke up?' 'Who's cheating first? Kim Jonghyun or Choi Minki?' 'Shocking truth behind the perfect couple relationship?' etc, etc. Their photos could be found in every news—in the newspaper, in television, in magazines—they're literally everywhere. The situation got worse because before the first news cleared, another news surfaced. And another news, and another news, and another news. Many news about them having a date and going out with many other artists were coming up without ending—and it left everyone confused. After the company felt that everything was too much to handle, they decided to make a press conference.

The press conference didn't clear anything at all—it made everything became worse instead.

Minki and Jonghyun both admitted that it was them. It was them who were having a date and going out with other artists—it was them who were kissing and hugging with other people who's not the one beside them now. Reporters started to ask when did they broke up, but their answer shocked everyone.

"We never broke up. We're still a couple now, and we will stay as a couple in the future."

The news about them lasted for 5 months straight, and even though there were many people who turned their back from them, there were still so many people who supported them, mainly because of their works and their chemistry. Everyone who looks at them could know that they have that chemistry—a chemistry that no one could explain. A chemistry that no one could have—a chemistry which screamed we exist for each other. And slowly many people accepted that it's just the way they live, and started to accept their dating news as a habit—as a routine, or maybe just something to entertain their life. Seeing people support and ignorance, Minki and Jonghyun continued their thing—still together, but making scandals here and there.

That's how they live.

That's how they love.

-----------------

"You want to take a bath before me?" Minki asked while taking off his coat.

Minki and Jonghyun just arrived at their shared apartment after they successfully (but barely) finished their schedule. They almost couldn't control their pissed expression, and some journalists successfully took photos of their hardened expression. Thankfully they realized it soon enough and could make a smiley face and cheesy attitude to each other before too much damage happened. Baekho and Minhyun both warned them, but they just waved it off.

"Is it okay?"

"I won't ask you if I'm not okay. Go ahead," Minki answered, he's already laying in their shared bed with his phone in his hand. Jonghyun walks to the bathroom without saying much, and Minki starts his bad habit: checking the news outlet. He lets out a small smile when he found that the news mostly consists of Jonghyun and his schedule this afternoon.

Never ending chemistry, Choi Minki and Kim Jonghyun.

He opens the news and feels pleased when he sees their perfect photos. Fashionable clothes, handsome faces, beautiful smiles, warm eye contacts—truly never-ending chemistry. Call him narcissistic, but he always loves himself when he's with Jonghyun. When everyone says that they have unexplainable chemistry, it's true. He's sure that he himself could never explain about what he has with Jonghyun.

Minki is enjoying his time until he reads a top comment in the news.

'They look amazing, but don't you think they look... sad? It feels like they're both longing into something, but idk, maybe I'm just overthinking'

Minki frowns. Did they really look sad? They thought they act perfectly. Maybe this person is too good at observing... But it's a top comment and gets so much vote, so it means many people think the same with this comment?

Minki shook his head and scrolls the news to reads more comments.

'They look happy but lately it feels like they're both suffering... why do they make so many scandals... Urgh. They should be happy with each other'

'What are they doing with other people when they both have perfection beside them? It ruins their happiness'

'JR just had his dating news this morning and he has a schedule with his partner in the afternoon.... are they really okay?'

'Let's see who will be Ren's dating partner tomorrow'

'I'm getting tired of them, can they stop making scandals and drama? Just live happily with each other'

'They need the popularity, of course they won't stop'

'Their scandals bring so many money, if I were them, I won't stop too lmao'

'Will they ever make scandals with normal people like me? I want to try to kiss Minki'

Minki can feel his breath hitched. He should've been immune to those kinds of comments, but lately he feels so weak. It's getting harder to tolerate everything—it's getting harder to accept everything. He perfectly knows that it's his own fault—to make such a deal with Jonghyun, to decide something extreme for his own life. He should be stronger than this, but everything feels so hard. His heart is aching, and he cannot hold his tears anymore—so he cries. After trying so hard to hold his tears for the past 7 months—since they started their deal—finally he lets his tears out. He cannot do this anymore.

"Minki?"

Minki doesn't respond. He keeps crying without even trying to hide his sobs. He cries openly, he doesn't care about their deal anymore. He doesn't care about their situations anymore—he doesn't care about anything but his feelings, his own heart.

"Hey," Jonghyun's voice sounds so soft in his ears, and Jonghyun's hand feels so warm on his forehead. It's not fair. He should be angry, he should be mad at this man but he couldn't. He couldn't. He cries harder in frustration, and he could feel Jonghyun climbs up to their bed and lays down beside him. Jonghyun's hand is his hair tenderly, and he really wants to scream to make him stop. Stop making him feels weak and useless, stop making him feels stupid and brainless.

But he couldn't.

"What happened?" Jonghyun asked him, still with that soft, annoying voice. Minki doesn't respond, and suddenly he could feel Jonghyun brings him into a firm, warm hug. This is not what I wanted, Minki thought.

He wants to scream.

He wants to slap him.

He wants to throw so many things to Jonghyun.

But he couldn't.

He couldn't.

Minki keeps crying and Jonghyun doesn't ask anything more. He Minki's back and buries his head in Minki's hair. Minki's sure that Jonghyun already knows why is he crying. He always knows everything about him.

And he hates the fact that Jonghyun knows.

"We couldn't end it, Minki," Jonghyun's soft voice can be heard again, but there's a taste of sorrow in his voice now. Minki hates this. Minki hates this kind of talk, Minki hates how Jonghyun always says that they couldn't end it, and Minki hates himself for always accepting everything silently.

"This is our only way," Jonghyun loosens their hug. He stares right at Minki's teary eyes, and Minki could see that there's hurt in his eyes too. Minki hates it. Minki hates how they both hurt, when they could be happy like what those comments say.

Why couldn't they end it?

"For us... to avoid feeling more hurt... This is our only way," Jonghyun whispered in Minki's lips, and before Minki could let out more sobs, Jonghyun kisses him. A desperate kiss, full of regret and sorry, full of love and hate, full of indescribable emotions—which make both of them out of breath. Not because the kiss is long, not because the kiss is too much—but they both forgot how to breathe. They both feel overwhelmed with their situations, with everything happened, until they couldn't take a proper breath for themselves. They stare at each other glassy eyes, desperately clings to their innocent, happy memories, when life was simpler and easier. When nothing to be worried about, when they could do anything they want without feeling afraid—without feeling burdened.

Jonghyun kisses Minki again. Harder, harder, harder. They both desperate to feel each other, to savor the moments when they still can. Every time Minki is about to sob, Jonghyun kisses him. Every time Jonghyun starts to cry, Minki bites his neck. They comfort each other in their own way, and when both feel everything is going to crumble in their perfect world, they hold each other tightly—with some kisses and bites here and there, trying to turn their tears and sobs with cries and moans.

Make me forget.

Make me forget.

Let's forget everything.

Let's forget everything this night.

Tomorrow night.

The day after tomorrow night.

Every night...

Until we run out time.

Until the day comes.

Let's forget everything.

----------------------

1 month after debuted.

Jonghyun sat tightly on his mom's favorite sofa—Minki bowed his head down beside him. They held each other hand tightly, too tight until they feel their hands cold because their blood circulation was stopped. Jonghyun's mom sat in front of them, a sad and regretful face could be seen on her face.

"It's not that I'm opposing," Jonghyun's mom sounded so sad, so sad that it made Jonghyun's eyes getting teary. "But... Jonghyun, you know how your Dad is."

Jonghyun knew. Jonghyun knew how his Dad would only smile even if he feels disappointed. He knew how his Dad would support him even though he opposed Jonghyun's decision. He knew how selfless his Dad is, and it made him feel guiltier.

"Dad... will support you. He's just shocked. He'll be okay... Just give him time, okay?"

Jonghyun nodded. He didn't trust his own voice right now, and he didn't want to make both his mom and Minki worried. So he stood up and hugged his mom fast, while whispering 'I'll come home soon' and walked out his own home. Minki stood and bowed before followed Jonghyun's steps. Jonghyun's mom smiled and looked at the two boys sadly, wondering what kind of fate that will come to them.

--------------

10 months after debut.

"Your Dad wants to speak to you... I'm glad you could find time to come home," his mom's worried voice welcomed him right after he came into his house. He returned his mom's hug tightly. He hurriedly came home after he received a text from his mom, saying that his dad wants to talk about something. He walked to his dad's room and he found his dad laying in his bed with his eyes closed.

Like always.

When he walked in, his dad's eyes opened slowly and their eyes met. His dad smiled softly, and Jonghyun felt his breath hitched.

"Jonghyun."

His dad's voice sounded so weak, but full of will. A will to live, a will to be strong, a will to be okay—his dad always full of will ever since he was a kid. A gentle but strict man, a man that he will respect forever. His one and only dad.

"Hey, Dad," Jonghyun whispered while he took a seat beside his dad's bed. "Mom said you want to talk."

His dad smiled, and Jonghyun felt his heart beat faster when he could see sorry in his smile.

This won't be a good thing.

And he's right.

--------------

1 year after debuted

"What do you mean with... Jonghyun, I don't understand."

Jonghyun could see hurt and confusion in Minki's eyes. Heck, he could feel hurt and confusion in his own heart too, but he couldn't find any other way to make everything easier.

"We should break up, and that's what I mean."

Jonghyun could feel his own voice trembling. Minki quickly took his hand and he could see panic in his eyes—Jonghyun wanted to hug him so bad.

But he couldn't.

"What did I do wrong? Tell me. Did I hurt you? I'm—"

"It's not... It's not you. Let's just... break up."

"I won't agree until you tell me why."

"Please, Minki, don't make this harder—"

"What's harder than my own boyfriend asking me a break up without any exact reason?!"

"My father wants me to have kids, okay!"

They both snapped—and they both speechless. Minki knew. Minki knew how Jonghyun adored, treasured his family, his parents—his father, and Minki knew how much Jonghyun loves his Mom and Dad.

And Minki understands automatically.

They kept silent. No one moved, no one talked, even taking a breath seemed so hard. Minki felt so overwhelmed, of course he knew.

He knew who will Jonghyun choose.

He knew.

He knew he will lose him.

Minki hugged Jonghyun tightly. He knew he couldn't do anything—they both know that he clearly couldn't give Jonghyun kids. They both knew what does it mean. They both knew.

And they both hurting.

It's frustrating when you already have something—and you want to keep it forever, but you can't. And you couldn't do anything at all—to make it last forever. Nothing. Nothing could change the fact that you need to let it go, and move on.

What makes it more frustrating is, you already have it.

But you need to let it go.

"I'm sorry," Jonghyun's broken voice could be heard and Minki couldn't help but cry. Minki didn't know what to say, didn't know what to feel. He felt so lost.

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry—" Jonghyun said repeatedly between his sobs, he sounded like a broken voice recorder but it hurts Minki's heart so bad. It's not his fault—but somehow Minki wanted to believe that it was his fault. Minki didn't want Jonghyun to say sorry—but somehow he wanted to hear someone to say sorry to him.

Because he also felt sorry for himself.

Minki didn't say anything and just hugged Jonghyun tightly. When Jonghyun kissed him desperately, he just let him. When Jonghyun bit his neck desperately, he just let him. When Jonghyun started to undress him, he just let him.

Because he needed it.

Because he wanted it.

Because they needed it.

Because they wanted it.

They woke up with puffy eyes and sore bodies—

And some twisted mind.

"Let's make our separation easier," Jonghyun said with his hoarse voice, with Minki tucked safely in his arms.

"How?" Minki asked tiredly. He felt a headache coming up, why did Jonghyun talk about this kind of topic first thing in the morning?

"Let's intentionally... playing with our feelings."

"What... do you mean?"

Jonghyun stared at Minki seriously. He looked so handsome—despite his puffy eyes and eye bags, Jonghyun looked so handsome and Minki felt his heart beats faster.

How could he leave this kind of man?

"Let's date and go out... with other people. Let's try to erase... our feelings slowly. Let's start moving on without being separated—because I think I couldn't handle it. I couldn't be separated from you so suddenly like this."

Minki blinked. What a... crazy idea.

But Minki could see his mind and heart agreeing with Jonghyun's words—because he knew that he too, couldn't be separated so suddenly with Jonghyun.

But what about their image?

"But... What will people think if they see us dating with other people?" Jonghyun stayed still for a while until he started to speak again.

"Let them be. Just—I don't know, can we just think about our own feelings? Let people think and assume. We just have... 1 year. I will marry someone I don't know in 1 year and have kids for the sake of my father—and live my life with them for the rest of my life," Jonghyun's voice hitched in his last part of sentence, and Minki could feel his breath hitched too. 1 year.

In 1 year, there will be no more them.

No more Ren and JR.

No more Minki and Jonghyun.

No more Choi Minki and Kim Jonghyun.

No more them.

With those kinds of thoughts in his mind, Minki hugged Jonghyun tightly and said,

"Let's do that. Let's do that...

Let's do our best and love until we cannot anymore."

---------------------------------------

Minki wakes up because his phone is ringing right beside his ears.

His eyes feel heavy and his body feels sore. He looks around him and he can see his clothes scattered around on the floor.

But he cannot find any trace of Jonghyun.

Minki sighs. His heart hurts—it feels like being stabbed with so many knives at once—but no more tears could come out anymore. This is their routine. Their routine for the past 7 months, and Minki thinks he's getting used to it.

It still hurts—but it's getting better.

Maybe Jonghyun's idea is a brilliant idea, after all.

Minki picks up his phone and he can hear Minhyun's annoying voice.

"Thank God you finally picked up! I thought you're dead. Get ready in 15 minutes, I'm on my way to your apartment, okay?"

"Hmmm."

"Eat or drink something, I only bring a bread and a mineral water with me!"

"Hmmmmmm."

"Stop it! Say something, will you?!"

"Okaaaaaaaaay, I got it," Minki answered lazily and hangs up the phone. It's too early to make problems with Minhyun. Minki yawns lazily and does his bad habit: checking news outlet.

 

Kim Jonghyun seen in a motel with y golden voice Hyorin?

 

 

But every time you hurt me, the less that I cry;

Minki lets out a sigh.

And every time you leave me, the quicker these tears dry;

Another person.

And every time you walk out, the less I love you;

Another news.

Baby, we don't stand a chance, it's sad but it's true;

 

Another day to live.

 

 

I'm way too good at goodbyes.