You weren’t exactly sure why you were doing this. Okay, that was probably a lie. It was most likely because Ravi had made a comment about the set-up around Hyuk and your brother had taken it on himself to pester you about the date until you agreed to meet Ken for coffee one afternoon. It had been a long week at the clinic, not to mention having to put up with taking care of Ravi along with Hyuk, and you were feeling a little frayed at the ends. So while a part of you simply wanted to skip this set up date, you knew that Ravi and Hyuk would never let you have a moment’s peace if you did.

That was how you had ended up standing outside of a small nondescript coffee shop, ducking your face farther into the scarf wrapped around your neck. The wind had turned cold and you knew that meant the days would start getting shorter and curfew creeping earlier until it would be almost impossible for some people to make it home from their jobs before curfew, either that or business hours (and work hours for employees) would be getting cut. Less hours at their jobs meant there would be more hungry people in the city again. It would also mean your group’s activity would rise again.

The feel of a hand on your shoulder startled you from your thoughts and you spun around, almost reaching for the knife you kept on you, but the daylight (and possible detainment that would come from having such a weapon) stopped you. You sighed softly seeing that it was only Ken, rather than an enforcement droid or the like. He dropped his hand from your shoulder, chuckling nervously. “Sorry. I should have known better. I thought you heard me when I called your name.”

A part of your brain wanted to call him cute. He was obviously nervous and embarrassed, if the way he was fiddling with the sleeves of his coat were any sign. He also couldn’t seem to look you in the eye again, and you frowned. While you weren’t exactly sure about the whole dating thing, you knew it wouldn’t work out if he was afraid of you, and you had never liked to think of anyone fearing you. Glancing back up at him, you noticed a smear of grease on his face again, this time across his forehead as if he had been pushing the hair from his face without thinking. Quickly reaching up, you wiped a hand across his forehead, trying to clean the grease away. A sudden blush crept over his cheeks as he glanced back up at you, the shock evident on his face and you couldn’t contain the soft laughter.

“You had some grease. Again.” He ducked his head and you smiled at him. “It’s a habit isn’t it? Of course, maybe next time you’ll remember to wash your face?”

Ken’s eyes were bright as he looked back up at you, the shock and confusion evident on his face. “Next time? I mean, we haven’t even-”

You laughed and reached to take his arm and pull him into the coffee shop, already feeling your fingers going numb from the cold. “Play your cards right and we’ll see?” After stepping into the coffee shop you shivered as you let the artificial heat slowly seep into your bones before turning back to Ken to see him smiling down at you. It was a little unnerving to have someone staring at you so intently, and you dropped your eyes again, instead walking up to the counter to order.

After ordering a coffee and slice of one of the cakes on display, Ken seamlessly continued with his order, handing over his identification card before you could even reach for yours to pay. You were about to fuss at him before he took your hand and pulled you over to a small somewhat secluded table by one of the few windows. “I insist. That’s what is proper on a date, right? I mean, that’s what the shows my mom used to watch always said.”

You sat across the table from him drinking coffee and talking about anything and everything. When his drink arrived you had laughed at the sight of the sugar filled monstrosity, but that had only made him pout at you, which made you laugh even harder. You slowly felt yourself relaxing more than you had with anyone else in a while. It was a little scary, especially given how dangerous your life was with the rebellion and such. Of course, you had to remind yourself, Ken was a part of it all too, even if he seemed too pure and innocent. He didn’t seem to have a part of himself broken like the others you had met before did. That almost made you want to protect him.

The waitress came by again later to say they were closing down because of curfew approaching. You blinked before glancing outside to see the darkening sky. You had spent more time with Ken than you had thought. He thanked the waitress and stood, offering to help you with your coat. As you stepped outside, you frowned at the clouds slowly drifting in. Darkness would be here sooner than normal, and while you had been on a few nighttime raids when the group was in need of medical supplies, you were not wanting to risk getting caught out after dark.

“My apartment is nearby, we should make it there in time. I mean, if you would like to stay? Your place is on the other side of the district, I don’t think you could make it back before curfew. I wouldn’t want you to risk it.”

Ken’s voice was soft and you reached to take his hand with a small nod, not sure if he would be able to hear you past the scarf you had wrapped around your face to try and fight the cold. He smiled before pulling you closer to him and starting to walk in the direction you assumed was his apartment. You knew the position was in part to help keep any suspicion from rising at them being out so close to curfew, but also to give a small fake sense of security and lessen the likely an attack from one of the bandits who had taken to thieving in the twilight time surrounding curfew. Although your heart gave a small flutter and you mentally laughed at yourself.

You kept close to Ken, mentally letting yourself be thankful for his height, even if you were pretty sure that in a fight you would be able to handle things better than him. There was something about him that just seemed to be softer than most of the other people you knew from the rebellion. While most of the other members of the rebellion all seemed to be fighting because of something that had happened to them and seemed to hardened a small portion of them. Even you weren’t the same as you had been when you were younger. There was just a sort of softness and almost innocence to Ken. And while you were worried about how one day he would end up getting crushed, a small part of you wanted to protect him and keep the softness to him.

Soon enough you reached an apartment building, nothing striking about the building, just another building like all the others in this corridor of the district. You stopped at the door just long enough for Ken to punch the entry code into the keypad by the door, before quickly stepping inside. The artificial heat in the entrance of the apartment building was set lower than most other buildings, and you shivered slightly. Ken took your hand in his and gave you a small smile.

“Let’s head up. I have a thick blanket you can wrap up in. It’s the softest and warmest thing you’ll ever find.” His smile made you laugh softly and his smile grew before turning to the stairwell. “I’m on the fourth floor. Our elevator rarely works, so it’s probably safer to take the stairs.”

He looked embarrassed and you just laughed before pulling your hand from his with a quick smirk. “Race you!” Without giving him any chance to respond, you quickly took off towards the stairwell. Luckily for you, trying to raise Hyuk the last few years had helped keep you quick on your toes, as your brother went through a phase of trying to run away every free moment. Not to mention how he had grown to love running from all the time you would spend exercising together. Of course you knew the stairs themselves were going to be a bit different, but you were fairly confident. Besides, Ken was an engineer who had hardly ever gone out on a raid.

You made it to the second floor before a pair of arms wrapped around your waist at the same time as Ken’s laughter rang in your ears. He pulled you back into an embrace, still laughing as he ducked his head towards your shoulder. You managed to turn around in his embrace, giving him a slight glare. “How-”

Before you could finish the sentence, Ken leaned in and pressed his lips to yours. The kiss didn’t last long, as he pulled back with a small smile, but you felt a small flutter in your chest. You quickly pushed it away. While you had grown to like Ken over the evening, you didn’t want to get too attached. Things were too unpredictable these days. Especially working with the rebellion, which was currently planning out a large scale raid. You only knew of the plans in progress because you had been asked to double the medical stocks in the hidden infirmaries around the city.

Of course Ken was a part of the rebellion as well, but his role seemed to be much more secure and safe, if there was even such a position in the group. He had workshops in a few of the bases around the city, but you had heard he did most of his work from home and worked at a small repair shop that was technically known to be neutral (as the owner really didn’t care where the clients came from as long as they could pay the fees). All in all, he seemed to be on the outskirts of the rebellion.

“What are you thinking so hard about? If it’s not too much of a secret?” Ken’s voice broke you from your thoughts and you turned to glance back up at him. His expression was concerned, and somehow you knew he was worrying about the kiss.

You shook your head, giving him a smile. “Nothing really. Don’t worry about it.” You didn’t want to lie to him, but you also didn’t want to hurt him. Pulling out of his arms, you gave him another smirk. “Besides, the race is still on and I’m not letting you win that easily.” You gave a quick wink before taking off again up the stairs.

It had been too long since you had let yourself relax and just have fun, and the laughter that bubbled up in your chest seemed almost foreign to you. While you weren’t exactly unhappy, with the things in your life you had learned to keep an almost hardened and very practical mindset. That was how you had stayed alive, and managed to keep Hyuk alive as well. After you had lost your parents, you were forced to grow up almost instantly. The government didn’t seem to care about two orphans who were right on the cusp of adulthood anyways, and you didn’t have any next of kin so you were both all the other had. Hyuk had only been fourteen at the time, and despite only being a few years older than him, you quickly found a job and spent all of your time outside of the pre-med lessons working to make sure that you had a place to stay and would never be hungry.

Just before you reached the fourth floor, you were caught around the waist again. Although this time Ken playfully lifted you and tossed you over his shoulder to carry you the last few steps, laughing loudly himself. After reaching the fourth floor landing, he gently put you back on your feet and gave you a grin. “So who won?”

Staring at his face, you smiled along with him. This was the most fun you had let yourself have in years, and part of you wanted to be greedy and soak it all in and take even more. To let yourself fall for the engineer who seemed much too soft to be with the rebellion. The more reasonable side of your brain told you to keep your distance, not to let someone else into your life and heart who you could potentially lose.

Ken’s hand moved to gently cup your cheek as he stared down at you. “Please give me a chance, Iris.” His face had lost the carefree smile, a more intense expression with something deeper in his eyes. The fact that he seemed to be able to tell you were struggling with the idea of letting him in made you drop your eyes. That was when he leaned in to press a light kiss to your forehead before stepping back. “Okay, I’ll wait. Come on, my apartment is just down the hall.”

When he turned to start down the hall, you noticed he tucked his hands into his pockets, the set of his shoulders slightly tense even through the coat. Sighing, you reminded yourself that this was for the best. You couldn’t take it if you let someone else in only to lose them. Your position in the rebellion wasn’t the most dangerous, but you knew that at any moment the enforcement droids could suddenly show up and drag you away. You were protecting Ken too. With the upcoming larger scale raid you knew things were more unsure and dangerous than normal. If you let yourself grow attached, and let him as well, something could happen to either of you and the other would be left to hurt alone.

Ken stopped in front of a door, punching a code into the keypad and then taking an old-fashioned key from his pocket and opening another lock on the door before holding it open to you. “Come in, although please overlook the mess. I wasn’t exactly expecting to have company, and well, I’ve been working on a few projects here and there.” He kept his eyes turned down and you wanted to reassure him, to bring the smile back to his face. At the moment he reminded you of one of the street dogs that sometimes lurked in alleys, the ones you could tell the world had beat them down for too long.

After closing and locking the door behind you, Ken reached to take your coat and scarf, hanging both on small hooks by the door before removing his own. Just then the sirens announcing the start of curfew rang out and you jumped slightly, only to be caught by Ken’s hands on your arms, which he quickly dropped after a moment.

You sighed softly as he started to brush past you, and you quickly reached out and grabbed his arm. “Ken, stop. This day has honestly been one of the most fun and nicest days that I’ve had in a while. Even though it has been a rough week at the clinic and I’ve had to care for Ravi while trying to keep Hyuk from getting any ideas about joining the rebellion as well. You made me forget all of that. Even just for a few hours. It’s just-” You paused, dropping your eyes to the floor, unable to watch the small spark of hope that had been growing in Ken’s eyes die away again. “I can’t let myself have anyone else to lose. I can’t risk hurting someone else I care about if something happened to me. You know how things are. I just .. I don’t want to hurt you.”

The silence hung between you for a moment before Ken suddenly rushed forwards and cupped your face in his hands as he kissed you again. Unlike the first kiss you had shared moments ago in the stairwell, there was a sort of fire in this kiss. Almost on their own, your hands settled on his waist, pulling him closer. Ken pulled back slightly for air, and you blinked your eyes open again to look up at his face. A slow smile spread across his face and he moved a thumb to gently your cheek.

“You can’t decide this isn’t worth the risk on your own. Don’t worry about hurting me. If anything happens to you, that’s what happens. The same for me. We both lead dangerous lives, Iris. You might have decided you had to close your heart off to people when you lost whoever, but I learned things are too uncertain to not grab what we want.” He dropped one of his hands to rest lightly on your waist, staring intently down into your eyes and you felt your face blushing. “If you feel it too, don’t waste the time we have worrying about potential futures that might not even happen.”

Ken’s eyes seemed to be almost burning with an intensity that you hadn’t seen in anyone else, and it made you a little self-conscious. While you still worried that something might happen to tear you both apart and leave scars, you also wanted to keep the happiness that you had all day with Ken. Without any other thought, you moved your arms to wrap around his neck and pull him back into another kiss. His hands quickly slid around to the small of your back, one of his fingers tracing along your spine. He seemed to be pouring every bit of intensity into the kiss and when you both pulled apart to breathe, you felt a little dizzy.

Just then your phone went off with a text and you debated on ignoring it, but knowing that Hyuk was home alone with Ravi, you were a little worried still. You glanced down with a sheepish grin. “I’m sorry. It’s just-”

Ken laughed and stepped back, running a hand through his hair. “You’re worried about your brother, right? Ravi’s not the best babysitter, I understand. I’ll just-” He gestured absently into the apartment to where you guessed the kitchen was. “Coffee?” You laughed with a small nod before pulling out your phone and opening the text.

“Staying at his place on the first date? ;) At least remember to be safe! … Ravi said “you’re welcome” too”

Laughing at the message, you quickly typed back. “You know me, I can’t resist an elicit affair after curfew … Well, unless it’s Ravi of course. ;) … Don’t die or destroy anything in that apartment or I’ll kill you myself.” You put your phone back into your pocket and started off in the direction Ken had gone.

The apartment was small and most of the free surfaces were covered in various pieces of machinery and what looked like half-finished projects. You were a little curious about what some of them were, and others looked far too complicated to even try and decipher. Walking into the kitchen, you laughed at the sight. Ken was staring at one of the cups of coffee sitting on the counter biting his lip before turning his eyes to the sugar and creamer that he had sitting nearby.

“I mostly drink it black. Although this late I’ll take a little creamer.”

You laughed as he jumped and spun around to you. Although the pout he gave you just made you laugh even harder before walking over and reaching to add some creamer to one cup of the coffee and then turned back to him with a smile. “Thank you. Now, I believe you promised a blanket that is the softest and warmest thing ever?”

Ken blinked at you, seeming to be caught in his thoughts. “Oh! Right! Of course!” He nodded before rushing out of the kitchen and you couldn’t contain the laughter again. It might be dangerous, but you quickly felt yourself falling for the adorable engineer.

A few minutes later, he returned holding a large blue blanket with a smile. “As promised, the best blanket in the world!” He laughed softly with a small blush starting to creep down from his ears. “I also have some possible pajamas if you want to change?”

You smiled and sat the cup of coffee down on the counter behind you next to a small piece of machinery that looked like one of the old-fashioned brain games that you had seen in school. “Thank you. The bathroom is-”

“The door to the right. Left is the bedroom, whenever you get tired. I’ll take the couch, don’t worry.” Ken’s face was fully blushing now and you thought he looked even cuter.

Of course his mention of taking the couch made you glance over to the small couch cramped against one wall of the main room before turning back to Ken with a small laugh. “I’m pretty sure you won’t fit even if you tried. We can share the bed, it’s fine. Although I should warn you, I tend to steal blankets.” Ken laughed softly with a nod, although he still seemed a little embarrassed, and you couldn’t stop the small smile from spreading across your face. “I’m not suggesting anything dirty. But I’m not going to kick you out of your own bed when you let me stay here to avoid being caught out after curfew. Besides, we can share the bed without having .” You reached and took the pajamas he had found for you before giving him a wink. “It’s just our first date, don’t get ahead of yourself. I’m not that easy. Depending on how things go, maybe next time or the third.” You laughed at the look of shock on his face before shaking your head. “I’m joking, Ken. You’re so easy to tease.” The pout on his face was the last thing you saw before slipping into the bathroom to change, laughing softly at how the day had ended.