It has been like this for a long time. Well, a few months ago, we’ve tried to talk and settle the thing about this. However, in the past few weeks it has been happening again. I don’t know what to do anymore. I’m so tired. Physically and emotionally. I feel like I got used to feeling this that I almost don’t feel it anymore. It has been a part of my system. What should I do? The more that I don’t see him; the more that he cancels our plans, the more that I feel so small. I feel rejected. I feel worthless. I feel like he doesn’t wanna be with me again. Then why don’t we just finish this and stop fooling around, right? We’re just joking with ourselves; making ourselves believe that we’re still in love with each other. Well, at least I am still, with him, but does he still feel the same for me?

-

“I can’t do this, Namjoon, I’m sorry. My brain is not functioning right now.”

What does she mean by ‘I’m so tired of this’? What does she want now? Is she just tired, tired? Or there’s more to it? I don’t know what to think anymore. I can’t seem to focus with work. I have to go now. There wouldn’t be any progress with this song anyway. I need to go now. I must go to her now.

“Okay, hyung. I know things aren’t going well with you and y/n now. I’ll call you if I encounter some problems.”

-

“Where are you going, love?” Y/n, please tell me you aren’t leaving me right now. Please.

“I’ve been talking to Soyeon for a while now. Her roommate left last month. I’ll move to her apartment now. I’m earning enough to pay for the monthly rent. I’ve to go now, Yoongi.”

“No, you are not going anywhere. You don’t have to leave me.”

“I have to.” She calmly uttered.

“Y/n, let’s talk about this, please.” I almost pleaded.

“Right, we have to talk about this. We have to properly talk about ending things between us.” She led me to the living room and sat down on the couch.

“Y/n! We’ve been through this before. We’ve always talked things through. We’ve always found a way to solve this problem. Please.”

“That’s exactly it, Yoongi. We’ve been having this problem for a long time now. We’ve always found solutions but those were just temporary. Things are just happening again and again, and again, and again… I’m sick and tired of trying to work things out when this relationship is bound to fail anyway.”

“How can you say that this relationship is bound to fail? I’m just trying to work. It’s my job, y/n, for Christ’s sake!”

“I know, and I don’t want you to stop working. You love music, Yoongi. You live for music. You don’t have to stop anything about it. I’m leaving so you can focus on it more. So that there won’t be anyone who’ll keep on asking for your attention, for your time, et cetera. Let’s set things straight first. Let’s rethink about our priorities and.. I don’t know, see eachother again in the future? Or not? I don’t know.” She let go of my hand and stood up, walking towards the door.

“Y/n, I can’t focus on my music without you. I don’t know how to live without you.” I tried to stop her. She looked back and smiled softly.

“Oh yes, you do, Yoongi. You know how to live without me because you’re always without me.” She reached out for the door and slowly went out of our apartment -- now my apartment, with her luggage, without looking back.  

-

END