“Hello…?” Yoona comes into the dorm, her steps are hesitant and careful. She tries to sleep the feelings away last night but when morning came, she woke up with a void that somehow could not be filled. She knew what she was missing, so the first thing she did was to drive off here. She isn’t sure if anyone is home because she knew her members had their own respective parties last night.

“Unnie?”

Yoona jumps, startled by the voice she is very familiar with. Whipping her head, she sees Seohyun in her casual attire, putting some cereals into the bowl.

“What are you doing here?” Yoona asks, eyeing the younger girl from head to toe.

Seohyun shrugs as a reply. “I just—It feels right… You know?”

The older girl smiles at the answer. Of course she knows, that’s the exact reason why she is also here. “What about you?”

Yoona chuckles. “You know, last night, I was hosting this show, right? And when the new year count down started, I grew anxious. I usually see you or one of you guys around, but I had no one. And when the alarm went off, I had no one to hug. So…You know… I come here for the hug…?”

“You are being so mellow at this hour” their heads turn towards the source of the voice. There stands Hyoyeon, with messy hair and drowsy eyes but the brightest smile on her lips. Yoona and Seohyun both run to hug the blonde girl, even it’s just the three of them, it sure is enough to lift up the mood. They find comfort in a little hug they share; how they never thought of how precious a hug could be.

“Guys…?” The three hugging girls break the contact immediately after hearing at the voice.

“Why are you here?” Hyoyeon asks first. “I thought you are at Jeonju?”

“Well—” Taeyeon’s eyes wander uncomfortably. “One new year holiday after all these years and I cannot seem to shake you guys off my mind. Weird, right?”

Before they can react to that statement, another two girls stand in the doorway. In their hands are bags of snacks as of they just swept clean a market.

“Wow, why are all of you here?” This time, Yuri voices out her surprise. The tallest girl in the group just stand beside her, not saying a word but her eyes are full of unshed tears. Sooyoung expected Hyoyeon to be at the dorm, but not the others. And in her heart, she knew that have the same reason to be here.

“Why are you with Choi Sooyoung since the first day of 2018?” Taeyeon asks right back at Yuri.

“I just cannot escape any of you guys” Yuri pretends to be unsatisfied; as if disappointed by the outcome that they are all here.

Yoona stands a little bit far away from the others, observing her members carefully. How she misses all of them together like this. A single tear escapes her eye and she hurriedly brushes it away. The gesture, however, does not get unnoticed by everyone.

“YAH! You shouldn’t start your year by crying! That’s not a good sign!” Yuri screams.

“It’s a happy tear!”

“Oh come on, it’s a sappy tear and we all know that!” Sooyoung shouts, booing the other girl.

“As if you were not teary yourself” Seohyun comments from her place, getting back to prepare her breakfast. “Anyone wants cereal?”

“Forget cereal, we brought some pastries for you”

“How do you know we are all going to be here?” The leader raises her eyebrows, a little doubtful at the tallest girl.

“We didn’t. We just—we wished you guys are gonna be here”

“Well, I am glad I don’t disappoint you. Now if you’ll excuse me, I am going to take a shower first” Hyoyeon yawns.

“Yea, you kinda stink”

“YAH! CHOI SOOYOUNG!”

After the breakfast, they all sprawled in the living room. Their eyes are fixed on the re-run of yesterday’s music show.

“There are so many younger artists there” Taeyeon comments.

“Umm… They all look so happy” Yuri bites her lips as soon as the words come out. She knows it’s a bad move as suffocating silence suddenly fills the room. They are all deep in thoughts.

They, as a group, have talked about the decision over and over again. They were okay with it, they have gone through all the ups and downs as a group and it was time for them to pursue their individual goals. The decision, however it turned out to be, was not an easy one. The members who stayed in the company painfully witnessed how the tallest in the group try to fight for her rights and negotiated with the company to grow as an artist but got offered a whole lot less than she demanded. She has also wanted a family of her own, but the company selfishly wanted her to not settle as fast as she wanted. She was in so much confusion when the others finally stepped in and told her that they know what she wants; that they are going to support her no matter what.

They also watched how youngest nearly threw away her dream for them. The moment she went home to the dorm to find solace in them; they knew she did not get the deal that she wanted. The youngest was somehow willing to let go of her desires because SNSD means life to her. Her unnies, on the other hand, could not watch her potentials gone wasted because the company was not gonna give her the room to grow as she needed. So they told her to, for once, think about what she wants and follows her heart.

They all also witnessed how Tiffany was agonizingly torn between choices. But they, as a group, also knew better. They knew what Tiffany really wanted so they told her that no matter what, she has done such an amazing job in Korea. If she thought that going back to her family is what’s best, let it be. She will always be the “brighter than jewel, Fany Fany, SNSD Tiffany” to them; even if they are half world apart.

Everything was fine, the decision was made. But then again why things don’t seem to get easier now?

“We will get there again, guys” Taeyeon finally breaks the silence. “We will. Someday, somehow, no matter how long it takes, we will stand on stage as a group again.”

Upon hearing her determination, the rest of them smile.

“We won’t know when, but we will” Yoona declares lowly. “I will fight to keep my place as an MC until we stand there as a group again”

They all laugh in unison.

“The difference now is only the fact that we won’t be working together as much. But this” Sooyoung gestures to all of them, “This friendship between us is forever. We are forever SNSD”

“I refuse to drop SNSD from my name” The youngest giggles.

“Yea, you shouldn’t. You are forever our maknae, forever our pride, you got it?” Hyoyeon commands as the youngest nods in eagerness.

“We are good, guys. We are okay” Yuri says, smiling at all of them as she gathers everyone in a hug. “Not even a big company can tear us down, okay?”

“Nothing can tear us down. I love you so much, Unnie-deul”

“Geez, maknae gets cornier every minute” Taeyeon rolls her eyes as the unnies giggle once more. “Hey, let’s call Tiffany. I don’t care if she is sleeping or drunk. I know she is going to get mad at us for not including her in this. Is she with Sunny already?”  

“I guess we have to call Sunny too. She’s gonna get all broody for not being here”

“Sica will also shred us to pieces if we don’t call her”

Yoona takes a step back to observe each and every member whom she holds dearly in her heart. She knows that the circumstances that they are in is not the most ideal. They don’t know how the future might be. They don’t know when they are going to promote as SNSD again but as they already said, they are still the same SNSD that she knows. They are still the comfort she runs to, her shelter; her home.