*Grey text is a flashback

---

By the time her schedule was finally over, Krystal staggers inside her apartment kicking off her heels. Another photo-shoot, done with. Another meeting with directors whose names she wont even remember. Another day where her heart feels heavy and she felt her world falling apart.

Walking towards the living room, grabbing a bottle of vodka while she sat on her sofa. She listened to the splash of the liquid against the glass. It was immediately soothing and she found herself anticipating the taste, the burn and the blissful numbness that the drink would bring after such a difficult day.

She wasn’t like this before. She hates herself for what she has become. For sitting here and drinking to dull the pain. She hates herself for it, but she still tips the glass and drinks the content in it; relishing the burn in the back of .

She sits in her quiet apartment, watching the clock on the wall slowly tick away. Memories flooding her mind, and just for a second, just for that slice of time she wants everything to stop.

But it doesn’t. Even if she closes her eyes, all she could see is,

Seulgi

---

She remembers the moment they first met.

The training room was abuzz with trainees. SM choreographer struggled to arrange the mass of teenagers to their specified section. Most didn’t know anyone in the crowd, however all of them knew that today was the start of a terrifying yet very satisfying career.

She leaned next to Sulli, knowing fully well that Teacher Hyuk wasn’t going to be easy on the new recruits. Krystal was really hard to please, so for Sulli to drag her here to watch new trainees get pushed to their limit, wasn’t appealing at all.

“Look at all of them, they haven’t even started the choreographer and they’re sweating already,” giggled Sulli

Eyes wandering around to see the glistening sheer of sweat on the other trainee faces, and she didn’t find anything humorous about it. Though, through the crowded room of individuals stood one trainee wearing a bright yellow shirt in contrast to the dark shades everyone else was sporting.

“Doesn’t she look like the bear on the T.V.” continued Sulli

“Winnie the Pooh,”

“I think she’ll be clumsy like him. I bet you an ice cream she is,” Sulli snickered

And Sulli wasn’t wrong.

The yellow shirt girl kept tripping, forgot the steps mid-routine, and definitely frustrated teacher Hyuk; yet she still maintained a smile on her face. Krystal admired her positivity even though she could see the sneers from her peers. When Teacher Hyuk dismissed the class, all trainees scrambled out of room preparing for their next schedule of the day. Few stayed behind to get more help from the teacher

Sweat covered her yellow shirt as she plumped to the ground exhausted and Krystal scrunched her nose in disgust. Not only does she look like a bear, she clearly acts like a lazy one too.

“You’re getting me ice cream,” teased Sulli

Sulli voice may have been a bit too loud as it caught the attention of the new trainee. Her eyes shifted to them with a look of surprise and slight admiration, and before she knew it, the trainee has made her way to them.

“They sell ice cream here?”

Krystal stood rooted as she stared at the newbie, who had a huge smile on her face, stand in front of her. A minute of silence falls between them and the smile doesn’t seem to waver.

“I’m sorry, my name is Kang Seulgi, and I’m new here. What’s yours?”

Seulgi extended her hand for a shake, and Krystal couldn’t help but grimace in disgust at the possibility of touching something dirty and possibly sticky.

---

Krystal sluggishly reaches for the bottle and pours herself another shot, and downs it in a heartbeat. She slams the glass down on the table and the sound reverberates surprisingly loud in her empty apartment.

Her mind still running through the memories that all seemed pleasant at one point in her life.

They had fun.

They’d end up talking heart to heart, delight in telling each other things that no one else would know, find stuff to giggle about, and then roar with laughter when they couldn’t hold it in. All in the while reveling in how they only got closer as they both grew up.

Krystal shakes her head and stares at the empty chair in front of her. She tries to imagine Seulgi in it; the petite figure with sharp features, adorable smile and bright eyes.

Seulgi, I need you.

But Seulgi wasn’t there and Krystal wanted to scream. Some days, she couldn’t muster the strength or will to even get out of bed. It was as if a piece of her was missing, like there was a gaping hole in her heart that she could never fill, and never live with.

There were days when she would be staring often for hours at nothing in particular. A ceiling tile, cloud in the sky, a crack on the wall – it didn’t matter; cause all she could see was the face that she had taken for granted.

Exhausted and broken, on the near point of insanity. She reached for her phone, her eyes searching for the familiar caller ID. She tried to steady her vision long enough to see if the number hasn’t changed.

Krystal knew that this might be a mistake, but all rational was tossed aside. Her sanity was on the line and she didn’t want to lose it.

“Hello,”

13 seconds.

It took thirteen seconds for Seulgi to reply to the call and Krystal let go of the breath she was holding in. She closed her eyes relishing the moment, as it’s been the closest she’s ever been for over a year.

“Krystal is it you?”

She felt her stomach clench as she clutched the phone tighter in her grip.

“Seulgi…”

A shuddering breath.

As much as she tried to remain clam, she couldn’t hold back a sob.

“Is everything okay? Are you alright?”

“I…” her voice wavered as she tried to muffle her sobs

She closed her eyes.

“I need you,” confessed Krystal

---

It all started with the thought of Krystal loved being friends with Seulgi. It wasn’t often that she could be herself to other, especially holding the weight of being SNSD Jessica Jung little si