Bright Christmas lights, glaring down the busy streets of Seoul, reflecting in windows of random cars, passing by in a hurry. A confusing mix of red and green, white and blue, violet and pink - it becomes too hard to identify each and every color that shines, spreading the spirit of excitement, summoned by the anticipation of a new year nearing the corners of crowded streets. 

People, not stopping once on their feet, running to and fro, collecting presents for their girlfriends and boyfriends, wives and husbands, sisters and brothers, mothers and fathers, or just anyone they find dear enough to give a gift. 

Christmas is still far away, but everyone can feel it, everyone is getting ready for it.

Well, almost everyone. 

Bae Joohyun rubs her temples in a weak manner, trying to lessen her headache, that has been accumulating for a few days, and looks at all of the paperwork on her work table.

“Contracts, contracts, reports, more reports, plans - idiotic plans. Honestly, who thought that giving them that amount of influence in a field that neither have an idea how to operate? And you think I’m going to sign that?” She drops the piece of paper and puts her head in her hands, sighing heavily. Joohyun rolls back from her table, spins around on her chair and looks at the city beneath, from the highest floor of her company’s building. 

So many cars, so many houses and apartments, so many people that drive those cars and fill those houses. 

Yet, she’s all alone. 

What a pity.

Unlike the citizens, who have someone to love and are probably spending their time together, Joohyun is sitting in her dark office, only lit with a small lamp on her table, alone. Most of the workers have already left, because she let them go home early and get ready for the celebrations. 

How did she get here? All of her life Bae Joohyun wanted to be perfect. Perfect score in school in college, perfect family, perfect relationship with a significant other… sadly, only one of her wishes came true, and now she, boyfriendless and girlfriendless, not exactly in the best relationship with her family, but at least she’s successful. Right?
 
“Miss Bae, it’s already late. Everyone already went home. How long are you going to stay here?” Her secretary, a sweet girl named Wendy, who charmed her right after showing up at the interview for the position of her personal assistant, asks.

“Seungwan,” she starts, choosing not to answer. She stands up and walks closer to the wide wall of glass, separating her from the big, big world. “I just had a thought… I have spent my whole life getting to where I am now, successful and powerful. But now and at moments like this, when I’m alone I tend to doubt whether it was the best way to live my life. I know so many people, yet I have no friends. I have so many money but I don’t have anyone to spent it on.”

Silence falls, only the the sound of ticking clocks breaking it. Wendy doesn’t respond and stares at her boss. It must be really hard for her; with the weight of all of the expectations and hopes, put on her frail shoulders. Not being able to find someone in a world full of people. 

“Ah, what am I saying?” Joohyun lets out a quiet laugh, that lacks any sign of amusement, and clasps her hands. “You can go home now, your girlfriend must be waiting for you,” she turns around and smiles a bit at Wendy, this time with some emotions on her face, her arms falling at her sides, softly. “Oh, and don’t worry about me, I’ll leave in a bit.” 

Wendy looks down and sighs. “Okay, unnie, don’t stay here for the night though. We both know how long that ‘in a bit’ of yours lasts,” she teases her superior, lightheartedly. She’s glad when she sees and (more importantly) hears the older woman laughing, mumbling yeah, yeah under her breath. 

Wendy looks back at the door of Joohyun’s office again when she leaves. It’s not right, she thinks, huffing, no one has to be this sad and lonely, especially at times like this. Maybe it’s not her place, maybe it’s too personal, and she shouldn’t care this much but she can’t stand the sight of a person she admires so much suffer like that. 

It’s wrong.

--

“Gosh, you wouldn’t believe it! She looked so sad and lonely, I could swear it made my heart break!” Wendy rants to her girlfriend while getting ready for sleep. She takes off her glasses and puts them on the nightstand near the bed, then slides under the blanket, clinging to her girlfriend’s form. “She’s so nice and kind, and deserves so much more and yet she’s all alone!” She continues, irritated, but calms down a bit after she feels the other woman’s hand rubbing her back slowly.

“Should I be concerned that you are talking about your boss while the two of us are cuddling?” A voice near Wendy’s ear grumbles, arms tightening around her small body.

“Of course, no, Sooyoung, it’s just…” She trails off and looks at the redhead.

Here she is, she thinks, with a nice, stable job that gives her a good income, cozy apartment she shares with her amazing, loving girlfriend who is anything she’s always pictured in one. Sooyoung always cares for her, makes fun of her just a little bit (but that is just a part of her irresistible charm), but loves her unconditionally nonetheless.

She knows that there are lots and lots of people who live like them, who have even better lives and destinies, but she’s happy. She’s really happy. 

And she wants her boss to be happy too. She’s always found miss Bae nice, not only to her but to many other people. As her secretary she’s seen some sides of Joohyun other people couldn’t get a chance to see, and that made her feel closer to the older woman. 

Wendy always admired how hardworking Bae Joohyun was. There were countless time when she and other workers would already go home, but her boss is still working in that office of hers. Also, mornings when she would go to work and see the state the older woman was in -  exhausted and drained (sometimes hungry and grumpy, but those are really rare times).

It’s a really harsh and unforgiving business they were in, and she can’t imagine how difficult it must be going forward, sweeping complications and any prejudices against women on her way, and keep rising to the top, maintaining the place at the highest of the highs.

So, Wendy believes that Bae Joohyun, more than anyone, deserves better than living a life filled with loneliness and endless mountains of paperwork. 

“It’s unfair.”

Sooyoung stares at her, silently, as she leans down and plants a soft kiss on Wendy’s forehead. “You’re too kind for this world,” she draws the smaller girl’s body flush against her own and hums softly. “I’ve met her a couple of times and I can tell that she’s strong as hell. Also, from all of those times you’ve told me about her, which I still find a bit worrying,” she smiles after hearing Wendy’s sleepy giggle, “I’m sure everything is going to be fine, so don’t worry too much. Okay?”

Wendy hesitates before answering.

“Okay.”

--

It’s already past midnight and Joohyun has just got home, and is finally in her bed. In her lonely, cold bed. When she opened the door of her vast apartment, only darkness and silence greeted her, suddenly falling on her shoulders, making it even harder to breathe. She’s been working all day and even though she is feeling dead tired right now Joohyun knows she isn’t going to fall asleep anytime later. 

It’s not the first time. When sleepless nights like this just started attacking her right out of nowhere, she chose to busy herself with things like working on some unfinished reports for her college professors, or doing laundry and enjoying the fresh aroma of a fabric softener. However, as time passed by, it became more frequent and distracting herself grew useless as thoughts and doubts about her future invaded her mind with a renewed force. 

She’s been alone almost a half of her life. She should have grown used to it. But she didn’t. Joohyun still can’t get used to the deafening silence of her kitchen as she eats some chinese take-out, she still hates when she wakes up, alone in her bed, 15 minutes before her alarm clock rings and waits, waits, and waits more, until the sound signalling her start of another long day rings.

Nothing really happens and she hates it. 

--

It continues like that; the steady pace she has set for herself to follow, every day and every night. Joohyun wakes up, does her morning routine, goes to work, then returns home. Rinse, repeat, rinse, repeat.

Although she is trying to see some nice things in life. After all, it’s not only loneliness and darkness. She still finds the beauty in things like the sky, how it looks like someone splattered a mix of warm colors and shades on it, when she looks at the sun setting from her office. Or that distinct feeling of joy Joohyun feels when

It continues until a sudden thought visits her when her secretary brings her tea one day. 

“Seungwan,” she starts, blowing on the hot liquid, and takes a sip. Perfect. “What do you think about animals?” 

Wendy looks confused at the question but recovers quickly. “Well, I think animals are nice. Except for crocodiles, I find them a bit scary.” 

Joohyun stifles a laugh but doesn’t try to stop a small smile from spreading on her lips. “Ah, yes, crocodiles are quite terrifying. But what I’ve meant was ‘what do you think about pets’?”

She briefly looks to the side before answering. “Pets are quite nice. We have a puppy at home. Why? Are you planning on getting one?” 

“Ah, no, just wondering,” Joohyun brushes it off, telling Seungwan to get back to work.

“Well, if you decide to get a pet I can recommend a really nice vet, a good friend of mine,” she says and then turns on her heels.

Joohyun frowns. She’s never had a pet in her life. When she was young all of her peers were either bragging about getting a dog or a cat or whining about not getting one. The only thing that concerned her at that time was her studies. She always tried to reach the best scores on her tests and get highest appraisals from her teachers in school to get her parents to at least notice her somehow. Obviously, it didn’t work, and she was already in too deep so what’s the point crying over spilt milk? 

It would make her and her place a bit less lonely - a pet - Joohyun guesses. And it’d be nice to come home and see someone there, waiting for her. Not a dog, though. No way.

--

Time passes and it’s the end of December, people are still celebrating, and the snow is still covering pavements of the big city, falling with, what seems, an even stronger vigour. 

Everyone is having fun, except for Joohyun. 

Because she got freaking sick. 

(She doesn’t exactly remember the last time she got sick, she’s been really busy at work so she doesn’t think keeping useless information like this in her head will do her any good.)

is sore and dry, no matter how much tea or milk she drinks, her head feels like it’s going to explode soon, and she keeps coughing, her lungs burning; one minute she’s cold and is curling under 3 thick blankets and next one she throws them away, and lies in her cold bedroom, only to tug them back afterwards. She’s hungry and yet she can’t eat anything. Joohyun hasn’t showered for two days straight and probably looks like a wreck: her eyes bloodshot and hair in a messy bun, her bangs falling, covering her line of sight. And the worst part of this whole situation is that she’s out of medicine. 

Of course, she could ask Seungwan to bring them to her but Joohyun just doesn’t want to give her any more troubles she’s already ‘awarded’ her with in the span of three days. 

So now Joohyun is walking in her long, warm padded jacket quite unsteadily, and she probably looks ridiculous right now but can’t bring herself to care, not now. She was embarrassed enough to show up at the drugstore in her attire. Snow, cold and merciless, is falling in her eyes and on her face, which she sure is extremely red now, and all Joohyun wants at this moment is to get back in apartment and tuck herself in her comfy bed. 

A faint sound from her right makes her stop. She looks around but doesn’t see anything. 

Meow.

She glances down and a gasp leaves her covered lips. There in the snow lies a small kitten, shivering and barely conscious. Without really thinking about her actions she leans down and takes it in her freezing hands. Joohyun takes off her scarf and hisses when the wind hits her cheeks. She wraps the animal in soft fabric, leaving an open area to let it breathe, and hurries to her apartment, hoping that everything is going to be okay.

“God, what should I do now?” Joohyun mumbles under her ragged breath, after getting rid of her shoes and jacket, mindlessly leaving them somewhere on the floor. 

She runs to her closet, bundle still in her hands, and grabs a spare blanket. She gently takes the kitten out of the scarf and covers it with the thick cloth. First thing, she needs to warm it up - done! Then what’s next? Think, Joohyun, think, you’re smart, c’mon! Right, it needs water or milk, or whatever. She quickly goes to the kitchen and delicately puts the animal on the table. She proceeds to take the milk and a small saucer. She sets it right in front of the kitten and waits for it to start drinking the milk. She frowns when it doesn’t and keeps still, whining. 

Think, Joohyun, think! What now? You don’t know what to do with it, you need someone to help. 

Help?

Wendy!

She sprints off from the kitchen to her bedroom to get her phone and dials her assistant, who picks up almost immediately.

“Hello, miss Bae, how are you-”

“Wendy, can you please tell me the address of that vet clinic that you’ve mentioned,” Joohyun stumbles over her words, and now is honestly  not the time to be worrying about this so she doesn’t. 

“Wait, did something happen,” Wendy’s worried voice can be heard from the device.

“Yes, now, please, send me the address,” she’s desperate. Joohyun takes the blanket, quickly dresses and runs to her car. She lets out a relieved sigh when a message with the address and the name of the veterinar lights up her phone’s screen. 

“Don’t worry,” Joohyun says softly to the animal, its slightly wet fur, while she’s waiting for the green light. She shouldn’t drive with this weather in her condition but she can’t let this animal die. “The doctor will help you and you’ll be fine.”

--

“Uhm, hi,” she greets the woman, sitting at the reception, “I’m looking for doctor Kang Seulgi?” 

“That’s me,” a voice from behind says. 

Joohyun turns around, and a quite unexpected sight meets her. A really pretty woman, probably younger than her though not by much. Joohyun notices that the woman - Seulgi -  is slightly taller. Her eyes are kind and her smile is friendly. 

“Are you Seungwan’s friend?” At her nod Seulgi motions her hand in the direction of her office. There she gently takes the kitten, who’s shivering less now, comparing to 20 minutes ago, from Joohyun and puts it on the table. 

“Is it going to live?” She asks, her voice trembling. Seulgi’s eyes widen at her sudden question. 

“Well, I still have to do the check up but I can assure you he’ll be fine,” her words, her gentle smile calm Joohyun who sighs in relief. “You can wait outside or stay here while I do the procedure.”

“I-I’ll stay here, thank you.” 
 
Joohyun sits down on a chair and covers her face with her shaking hands. She feels how the adrenaline that has been rapidly running in her system disappears, and exhaustion starts to fill her bones and limbs. Joohyun touches her cheek that is sure red by now; it seems like her fever only got stronger with her running about. This whole ordeal with the stray cat made her completely forget about her condition; her sickness being put on second place at the time. 

“What happened to him?” 

Joohyun looks at the woman who’s now holding a syringe. “Um,” her fingers latch onto each other, “I was walking home and found it in the snow, alone and freezing. I just couldn’t leave it there.” Joohyun explains herself, not knowing why she suddenly feels like she’s defending herself.

“Well, you did a really nice thing then. Not many people would do the same,” Seulgi says as she takes her gloves off and turns to look at Joohyun who came closer to the table.

She suddenly feels really stupid. Here she is, standing in front of a very attractive woman who just helped her, only clad in her sweatpants and a worn-out hoodie, her face void of any make up and hair uncombed. It becomes worse when she starts coughing violently and the other woman’s face turns concerned. 

“Are you okay?” 

Joohyun just shakes her head in dismissal, mumbling a silent i’m fine. She looks at the kitten who already stopped shivering and fell asleep. It looks much better now.

“Thank you, Seulgi-ssi,” she bows a bit.

“No need to thank me…” the doctor trails off, realizing that she doesn’t know the name of this woman.

“Joohyun. Bae Joohyun.”

“Well, no need to thank me, Joohyun-ssi,” Seulgi smiles softly, “Any friend of Seulgwan is my friend.” 

Joohyun nods, of course Wendy’s friends would be just as nice as her. She’s about to ask how much she should pay, when she realizes that she left her wallet at home. What an idiot.

“I’m sorry, I don’t have any money on me but I will repay later-”

“Nonsense,” Seulgi interrupts her, raising her palm, “There’s no need. I just checked him and gave him a small shot. The only payment I need is you to take care of him, okay? Also, it seems like you need to take care of yourself too, Joohyun-ssi.”

Joohyun is baffled. It’s been a long time since someone treated her so nice, not including Seungwan who just was an embodiment of niceness and sunshine. Some of the people she knew were trying to get close to her to gain some benefit from being associated with a successful CEO, hence the reason for her being alone. Although it happened to many times and she tries not to pay much attention to it, it still hurts from time to time. 

But this woman, Kang Seulgi, stands right there, in front of a person she just met, being this compassionate and kind. Joohyun doesn’t know what to feel. 

“Thank you.”

--

“Doctor Kang, there’s someone who wants to see you.”

“Please, tell them to come in,” Seulgi responds not  moving her attention from work at hand. A sound of the door closing and opening, and closing again breaks the silence of her office. “I’ll be with you in a few seconds,” she kindly says still not turning around.

“Um, hello,” a familiar soft voice immediately  makes her drop her tools and look at the entrance. 

There stands the woman who came a couple of days. Only she is looking less like she did then and more like the classy, hot CEO Wendy has described her to be, not that she asked her about this woman (she totally did). She is wearing what Seulgi assumes is her work attire. And it honestly makes Seulgi a little confused; how can someone who looked so adorable and a little shaken be so damn elegant and good-looking. Seulgi’s sure there’s some witchcraft involved. 

“I’m Bae Joohyun, I’m not sure if you remember-”

“Of course, I remember you,” she interrupts and she really better shut up right now. “How could I forget someone like you?”

.

Kang Seulgi, why do you always say embarrassing things like this?

“I-I mean.. how can I forget someone as kind as you?” She tries to come up with words that will get her out of that hole she dug for herself. Seulgi sighs in relief when the woman looks down, flustered, and Seulgi thinks she really shouldn’t be. “How is he, by the way?” She smiles a bit when she sees Joohyun’s (what a pretty name) face practically lit up.

“He’s doing much better, thanks to you! He’s eating now and looks much more healthier when I found him. And his fur is really soft now and he’s running all around the apartment, exploring. It’s really cute,” the smaller woman suddenly blushes after realizing how into she got, telling this woman with compassionate smile about her new pet. 

“That’s good,” silence falls. “Then why did you come?” Idiot. “Wait! N-no! That sounded really rude! Sorry! I didn’t mean to say it like this! I’m sorry! What I meant was why did you come if he’s doing okay now?” 

Seulgi wants to smash her head on something hard, preferably some wall. But for now she settles on covering her face, and Joohyun can only laugh when she hears the other woman’s next words, mumbled against her hands. That’s why you’re working with animals and not people.

The sound that reminds bells’ ringing makes Seulgi look up and see Joohyun who’s covering , her eyes crinkling.

“It’s okay, I understand what you mean,” she composes herself. “I wanted to ask if you would let me to take out on lunch. As payment?” 

Seulgi doesn’t know what to say. A very nice, kind and beautiful person is asking her to have lunch together. As payment, of course, but that still doesn’t mean her heart doesn’t skip when an uncertain, shy smile appears on the woman’s face. But let’s be honest. Can she decline?

“I’d love to.”

--

Joohyun doesn’t know how and why but she gets a new friend. A real friend. A friend you talk to and they listen to you and try to help you. After going out with Seulgi on these outings (she wouldn’t call them dates, not exactly) she found herself getting closer to the younger woman. They see each other constantly and when they don’t, they try to text with each other, whenever they have time.

It’s nice and refreshing, having a person she can turn to, that won’t ignore her and her worries even though everyone has a lot of thing on their plate. It’s nice but that doesn’t mean it doesn’t scare Joohyun. It does. She’s afraid how easily Seulgi can burst into this bubble of loneliness and misery of hers, carrying a bunch of flowers and pretty lights, setting them everywhere, not leaving an empty, dark space. Seulgi is a bright ray of sunshine on her darkest days. Seulgi is a safe house when her world feels like it’s ending. Seulgi is her well on days when she feels like she travelled through the longest desert without a sip of water.

And it terrifies Joohyun how much she cares for her.

--

They’re having dinner at Seulgi’s favorite diner when Joohyun finds out that today’s her birthday. 

It’s when the owner of this place, an old lady with a face that screams kindness, greets Seulgi in a manner someone would pamper a baby, pinching her cheeks and scolding her, saying things like you’re so thin and didn’t see you here for so long, did you forget about me, and putting them in a bit awkward situation asking whether or not is Joohyun her girlfriend. Thankfully, she let them be and lead them to a free table, telling them to think about what to order.

It’s when the old lady comes, holding a cupcake with a candle on its top, and Joohyun is a little confused. Then she starts to pat Seulgi on head, congratulating her with sweet words. When the owner leaves them she glares at the other woman, who sheepishly stares at the cupcake, and steps on her foot.

“Ow!” 

“That’s for not telling me that it’s your birthday today!”

“Why are you being violent then!? If it’s my birthday!”

Joohyun just shakes her head and kicks Seulgi’s leg once more, lighter this time.

“Whatever, whine all you want but today everything’s on me,” seeing that Seulgi’s about to protest she sends a glare that shuts her up before she even opens . 

Later, after she pays for everything, fully ignoring Seulgi’s complaints, Joohyun takes her to the only place she knows perfectly, which is Han River. Because the sky is so pretty today, and she feels a little guilty not giving Seulgi anything and taking her to a place Seulgi’s been on her a lot of time. But her worries disappear after Seulgi stares at her, with that really soft look in her eyes, a tender thank you leaving her pretty lips.

(Though she still gives her a gift after consulting with Seungwan who only stares at her teasingly.

Joohyun doesn’t pay any attention to Seulgi’s unnie! it’s too expensive because, really. Money isn’t a problem for her. Having it was a certain bonus but it didn’t make her feel anything. Finally finding someone she can spend it on? Especially the person who cares for her and not her riches, reputation or connections? That’s a whole other story.)

There’s a lot of money, but there’s only one Kang Seulgi.

--

Joohyun falls in love with Seulgi.

Should have she expected that? She has been trying to prove to herself that it was only admiration, pleasure of finding someone she can rely on, that she felt towards the younger girl. 

Until that day.

--

That day being saturday’s late evening. She decided to rest a bit and got herself a nice bottle of red wine and some appetizers, sitting on her couch in the living room. One glass became two, two became three, three became five, and by some unexplainable reason she just got so, so sad. She became sad and even Choco who was laying on her lap, purring, for the whole process of ‘resting’ couldn’t stop her from feeling devastated. 

Being not in the right state of mind she took her phone and dialed the only person she knew would come to her. Well she hoped she would. 

Seulgi, who picked up almost immediately, her voice rough with sleep (was it this late? she honestly doesn’t know). 

Seulgi, who got to her apartment 20 minutes later, wearing sweatpants and a t-shirt, a sleepy expression on her bare face, but still extremely worried if something had happened to her. 

Seulgi, who held her tight in her arms after Joohyun told her that today was the day her parents disowned her all these years ago after she came out. It’s been a long time but it still hurts like hell.

(“Whenever I would fall into slumps,” she says softly, slowly running her hands up and down Joohyun’s back, “my mom would hug me and whisper sweet things.”)

Seulgi, who made Joohyun cry after leaving a soft kiss on her temple and then wiped all the tears away.

Seulgi, who brought Joohyun to her bedroom and tucked her in and didn’t leave until she fell asleep, keeping her promise to the older woman after the latter asked her, slurring her please, don’t leave me.

Seulgi, who answered with her equally soft never, running her fingers on Joohyun’s pink cheeks, watching her fall asleep with the saddest, yet warmest eyes.

--

Never before in her whole life Joohyun had felt more embarrassed.

(She’d never felt more in love, either).

--

Joohyun is returning from a meeting and misses the amused way Seungwan is looking at her on her walk to the office. When she enters, the smell of flowers greets her and as Joohyun looks closely she can see a bouquet standing on her table. As she inspects it she finds a note, with a handwriting that is oh so familiar and rolls her eyes, biting her lip.

A little birdie told me that it’s your birthday today! I’m sad you didn’t tell me, though ㅠㅠㅠㅠ  But it’s okay, I’m not mad. (I’m not going to smack you btw). I didn’t get you a present yet but I will, and I’m gonna make sure you’re going to love, because I’m such an awesome person! Have a nice day!

:D

Joohyun chuckles after she sees the signature, and honestly there’s only one person who could give it to her. 

“What’s so funny? Wanna share with me?” A voice says right near her ear and Joohyun almost jumps. She turns around and there stands Seulgi, an annoying(ly attractive) smirk on her face, and Joohyun doesn’t know if she wants to kiss her or hit her. She settles on the second option.

“Ouch! Why are you so violent?” Seulgi mutters, rubbing her shoulder and pouting, and is she really 25 years old?

“Stop that,” Joohyun grumbles, pointing at other woman’s face.

But she doesn’t complain when Seulgi takes her in her arms and squeezes. She only nods and hopes that Seulgi doesn’t see how red her face is, when she asks whether she likes the flowers. She prays to all the gods out there that Seulgi doesn’t catch the way her heart is beating rapidly inside her chest. The hug is already much longer than a usual hug between two friends should last, but neither of them notice, content in their own little world. The moment is broken when Seulgi opens .

“So how’s your life as a grandma, uh?”

Way to ruin the mood.

“Don’t you have any animals waiting for you?” Joohyun asks, her tone cold, after pushing Seulgi away from her and moving to sit behind the table.

“Ahh, c’mon, I’m joking!” Understanding that Joohyun isn’t going to reply anytime sooner, Seulgi laughs and goes to the door. “Okay, okay, I’m leaving. Bye~” 

“Bye.”

“I’ll call you later, okay?” A head pokes out the door with a hopeful expression.

“Just go already!”

The door closes and Joohyun slumps in her chair. She is confused and she knows she shouldn’t be. Seulgi is a friend. An amazing, close friend who does all those things that make her heart beat ten times faster, things that steal her breath. A friend that doesn’t notice how she struggles, hiding her feelings. Joohyun is glad she still hasn’t said anything embarrassing. Although, she feels like she’s closer to making that mistake each and every passing day. Joohyun knows that she needs to do something with it because these stupid feeling will ruin their friendship. 

What to do.

--

“Is there something wrong, Yerim-ah?” Joohyun asks her cousin who came to visit her, noticing her numerous glances at the bouquet of flowers. 

“Who gave you these flowers?” 

“A friend.” Joohyun feels her face getting warm. “Why?”

“Ah, nothing much,” she starts inspecting her nails, appearing nonchalant about this. “Do you know that there’s a whole flower language and each flower represents something?” 

Of course, Joohyun knows. She often saw men giving women they like flowers that had some deep meaning. But what message did Seulgi wanted to send her, using these specific flowers, that even had her dear, little cousin interested?

“Why? Does this one say something offensive?”

“Well...not exactly.”

“Are you going to tell me then?” What is this kid trying to do?

“Now, now, where’s the fun in that?” Yerim smirks and Joohyun doesn’t know what she did to deserve thi evil person as her only normal relative. But, meh, that’ll do, she guesses.

“Well can you at least tell me the names of some of these flowers?”

--

Red amaryllis is a flower that wants to tell you how beautiful you are.

Red carnation is a flower that wants to tell you about the feelings of great admiration and pride. 

White carnation is a flower that wants to wish you good luck in all of your beginnings.

Delphinium is a flower that hopes you will see the best side of things, it hopes you open your heart for new feelings.

Gardenia is a flower that trusts you and wants your trust. It appreciates your friendship and wants to protect you.  It tells you “You are lovely”. 

Lavender is a flower that tells you it will be with you until the very end.

Blue and purple iris believes in you and compliments your wisdom.

Pink lily is a flower that flirts with you.

Red lily is a flower that has passionate feelings for you. 

Lilac is a flower that wants to be your first love. 

First love.

First love. 

Love?

Joohyun stares at the screen of her laptop, her eyes wide, breathing uneven and face burning. What does that mean?

“Choco, what does that mean? Does Seulgi like me? Is she in love with me?” She breathes, looking at her cat who’s lying on the other side of her bed, his paw, uninterested and clearly not caring as if his owner isn’t having an emotional and mental breakdown at the same moment. Choco stands up lazily and moves to her stomach. He raises his paw and softly guides it to her cheek and then...pushes.

“Did you just slap me?” She watches, bewildered, as her pet settles himself on a second pillow. “It’s easy for you! You don’t have any of those love problems,” she coos, the fur on Choco’s neck. Great, now I’m talking to animals. 

She must’ve gone crazy.

--

She has, she decides. 

It’s past midnight and she should sleep and not listen to Seulgi’s voice that sounds so lovely so late into the night. The younger woman is talking about something that happened on her job but if Joohyun has to be honest she doesn’t understand anything. Maybe it’s because she’s worked really hard today and got extremely tired. Maybe it’s because Seulgi’s usually lively and bright voice is replaced with a quiet, soft one that Joohyun doesn’t get to hear that often. But she hears it now and her tummy keeps tingling. 

She’s been watching Seulgi closely for the past week. And she noticed the way her gaze would linger whenever she talked. How Seulgi would always try to be closer to her, not quite touching but still there. She noticed the sweet words Seulgi would always say to her, encouraging her that everything will be alright. 

Joohyun knows that she loves Seulgi. And she’s ninety percent certain that Seulgi, maybe not in love, but surely likes her back.

What she doesn’t know is why no one would do anything to fix this silly situation where both of their hearts are standing right in front of each other, only thing that is stopping them being a sign with a white brick inside of red background. 

So stupid. Both of them.

“...can you imagine? I think that’s the weirdest thing that happened to me ever in my life. 

And as much as Joohyun desires to find out what happened to her heart’s keeper she only hums in response softly.

“Unnie? Have you heard a thing I said now?” Seulgi teases her.

Why is Joohyun like this? She’s not in high school anymore. She’s a successful business woman, that runs one of the most influential companies. She’s a person who can make others want to run and hide if she wants. She’s a woman many men are scared of. And here she is behaving like she’s a teenager whose crush said hi to them, acknowledging their existence for the first time.

Because of one and only Kang Seulgi. 

And she truly must be crazy because she’s about to do the thing that is going to ruin their friendship or turn it into something bigger.

“Seulgi,” Joohyun cuts the younger girl’s ranting softly. “Will you go on a date with me?”

Wait, no, what, why did she even say that!?  

She starts panicking when Seulgi doesn’t respond. Maybe she’s read all the signs wrong and Seulgi doesn’t like her romantically and just thinks of her as a good friend or - 

“Yes!” Seulgi practically shouts but composes herself later, “I mean, yes. I would love to go on a date with you, unnie.”

After they goodnight to each other, Joohyun starts jumping around, scaring Choco. She takes him into her arms and peppers kisses all over his face, mumbling something like your mommy’s got a date, can you believe this? 

She doesn’t fall asleep until one in the morning and when she does the biggest smile adorns her face. 

--

Joohyun is in front of her mirror, looking at the outfit she chose for her date with Seulgi: an off-shoulder top and a pair of shorts. She decided to let her hair down tonight, falling in waves on her bare shoulders. Seulgi once asked her why she always has her hair up and said that she’d look really pretty like this, so Joohyun wanted to surprise the younger girl like this. 

She knows that if Seulgi agreed to go on this date, she’s at least attracted to her. Right? So she doesn’t have any reason to worry. Except that Joohyun worries and worries to the state when she thinks she needs to take a drink to give her some courage, but quickly dismisses that though when she hear the doorbell ringing and runs to the hallway. WHen she opens the door a sight to behold greets her. Seulgi, in a similar outfit, the only difference being her wearing an ed shirt, holding a small bunch of flowers (she’ll need to ask her what they mean if she gets the chance), beaming down at her. 

“Hey there,” Seulgi’s eyes run down and up her body, “These are for you,” she almost slams the flowers in the smaller girl’s hands. Seeing this Joohyun bites down her smile; she’s glad she isn’t the only one who’s nervous. 

“I’m just going to grab some stuff and we can hang out, okay?” She goes to the bedroom to take her purse. When Joohyun returns she sees Seulgi playing with Choco and the sight makes her smile. She’s glad that her pet has finally met someone beside his owner. 
(Okay, that would be a total lie. He has met her cousin when Yeri decided to visit her during the weekend. Joohyun will probably remember for eternity how the younger woman started panicking, screaming things like ‘you didn’t tell me you got a cat!’ and ‘okay, I’m outta here’. Thankfully, she got Yerim to calm down but she had to bring Choco to her bedroom and pray that he wouldn’t come out. Gladly, he fell asleep and no similar accidents occurred. 

However, Yeri told her that she would likely not visit her at her apartment after this.)

“All ready?” Seulgi asks her, standing up. Joohyun nods and they leave the apartment. “So where now?” 

“It’s a surprise,” Joohyun responds, her arm intertwining with Seulgi’s out of habit. “Shall we?” 

Although, Seulgi’s presence beside her was calming her a bit, her cheerful voice talking about something, Joohyun couldn’t be more nervous. What if it’s stupid? She has no idea how to do this whole dating thingy. She doesn’t want to screw whatever their relationship is at this point up. She wants it to work. She wants to be with Seulgi. Joohyun doesn’t want to think about what would happen if this doesn’t work out. Would they stop talking? Or would it be extremely awkward? Not now.

Joohyun takes a deep breath when she sees the place of their designated date closing in. Her palms start sweating and her heartbeat speeds up. Suddenly, Seulgi stops walking, making Joohyun look at her worriedly. Seulgi must think it’s stupid. Gosh, she should’ve asked Yeri about some date ideas. Even her cousin has more experience.

“Seulgi? Is everything okay? We can go to some other-”

“Are you taking me to Lotte World?” Joohyun is a little confused because Seulgi’s voice doesn’t sound disappointed, it’s more of a mix of… surprised and excited? Joohyun’s eyes widen when she feels arms around her and words thank you, thank, thank you reach her ears. What?

“I haven’t been to Lotte World for so long! What are you waiting for? Let’s go!” Joohyun lets the taller girl drag her to the entrance of the park. She hoped that Seulgi would like it but never had she imagined that she would be so enthusiastic about it. 

And she is. They are walking around the park and Joohyun is sure that Seulgi is a child stuck in a grown woman’s body, judging by the way her eyes and smile glow, her voice happy and bright. They have been playing at arcades with Joohyun winning almost in everything, making the younger girl scowl at her playfully. But Seulgi got her revenge when they chose to play a game where you need to shoot things, winning a soft toy and then giving it to Joohyun, both of them blushing. They rode some attractions, ate delicious food and just had fun.

It became crowdy when late evening started nearing and Joohyun can still feel her blush when Seulgi took her hand so they don’t get lost. They have held hands a couple of times before but somehow it felt very different. Maybe it was the fact that their fingers were interlaced. Maybe it was Seulgi’s thumb that was pressing into the skin of her palm, moving in small circles. Or maybe, she felt so lightheaded because Seulgi’s grip was strong but at the same time incredibly soft, making her feel safe in this massive sea of people. 

Her, the one who gets so easily scared at the smallest things. However, this time she wasn’t scared of a small thing. Actually, the thing was big. Gigantic, she would say. Joohyun noticed how the younger girl’s eyes lighted up when she looked at the Ferris wheel. 

“Do you want to ride it?” Joohyun asks, trying to stop her voice from shaking.

Seulgi looks at her and shakes her head. “No, it’s fine, we don’t have to go there if you’re scared.”

“Me? I don’t get scared, Seul. Let’s go!”

Now that she thinks about it, it was a horrible idea. That was a big, big, big mistake and she should’ve kept her toes on the ground. Joohyun thought that it would be okay since it’s not that high and it’s supposed to be safe. Oh how wrong she was… The moment the cabin started moving up from the ground Joohyun began shaking in her seat. She looked out of the window, and boy she shouldn’t have. Lights of the park kept getting farther and farther  and she could only squeeze her eyes shut. It became easier, however, when she felt Seulgi’s hand on her fist and back, running up and down, calming her rapidly beating heart.

“‘I don’t get scared’, yeah, I see,” she mocks her good naturally, and Joohyun is about to complain that she doesn’t sound like that only to close at younger’s next words. 

“You know… You really didn’t have to do this. I don’t want you to be uncomfortable whenever you’re with me. We could just sit together, and I’d still be the happiest person on the planet.”

She feels her stomach tingling and her heart beating at the speed of sound for an absolutely different reason.

Here’s Seulgi, who changed her way of living her life completely after appearing in it. And she’s staring at her face in such tender way, Joohyun thinks she’s either going to melt or suffocate, she still hasn’t decided. Her eyes fall to Seulgi’s mouth; pink lips slightly parted and Joohyun catches herself thinking about touching them. It’s suddenly became really hard to breath and the booth seems very hot. 

Seulgi’s face grows closer to hers, and Joohyun’s eyes fall to the hand that is now on her jaw. She feels how their breaths meld; her eyes close involuntarily when Seulgi’s thumb gently moves across her lower lip. She doesn’t know who leans in first and she doesn’t care. Their noses bump into each other and Joohyun grins, hearing younger woman’s breathy chuckle. She tilts her head a bit and - 

BOOM. 

There’s firework and people on the outside start screaming in joy, breaking into their little world where only two of them exist. Joohyun immediately hides into the bigger for of her date and covers her ears, her eyes shut. She relaxes a bit when Seulgi’s hands snake around her waist and tug her closer. Joohyun starts relaxing a bit under her touch, inhaling the woman’s calming scent and listening to Seulgi’s low voice in her ear. 

She holds her like this until they return to the ground. 

It’s a bit awkward when they get out but any uncertainty Joohyun’s been feeling disappears when the younger woman takes her hand again, leading them; the park is closing soon, so Seulgi suggested to wander around for a bit.

They are walking along the riverside in silence; one of Joohyun’s hands is in Seulgi’s slightly bigger one and the other is tightly holding the Ryan plushie. She smiles when the younger squeezes lightly and returns the gesture. It seems like the damn feeling in her stomach slowly started creeping to other parts of her body, infecting. 

Seulgi notices when Joohyun shivers once but doesn’t say anything. When it happens again she stops and unwillingly lets go of the warm hand. She takes off her shirt and wraps it around Joohyun’s bare shoulders. 

“Here.”

The smaller woman ducks her head and lets her hair cover her reddening face.

“Thank you.”

She says in that soft voice and Seulgi swears that her insides are going to burst because of this amazing, incredible woman who does it without a slightest idea. 

Joohyun does all these things and she has no intention to ask for forgiveness.

And she loves it.

“Are you tired?” Seulgi asks quietly and reaches her hand to tuck a strand lock of hair behind Joohyun’s ear.

(Her mother probably would not be very proud of her at that moment if she knew. 

Seulgi has always been a good person, she listened and respected people that were older than her, almost never raised her voice and always tried to help, she followed the rules nicely.

 She also really liked visiting museums with her family when she was young. 

And there was always this one rule that she understood perfectly. 

But here she is, breaking it, slamming it to the floor with all the fondness and admiration for the older girl.

She is touching the art.

And for once in her life, Seulgi doesn’t feel a tad bad about doing something wrong.)

Because there’s Joohyun in front of her, in a shirt that’s slightly big for her, nodding and leading them to the nearest bench. 

They sit like that for some time. Their shoulders touching, head raised to look at the stars. The sky is clear tonight, making it easier to enjoy the view, but Seulgi still find herself looking at Joohyun and her eyes that seem to have their own stars, that make all others look bleak. 

And she wants to thank whoever placed them there. 

“I’m happy,” she whispers, linking her pinky with Joohyun’s.

The woman looks at their hands, at Seulgi then leans back and puts her head on Seulgi’s shoulder, smiling into it.

“Me too.”

--

The lift ride is weird. They don’t talk and stare ahead. However, when Joohyun turns her head to look at Seulgi, she catches younger woman’s eyes; Seulgi does too. 

When they near the door of her apartment silence falls onto them. Joohyun stares at her feet, not knowing how to conclude this date. Were they supposed to kiss? They almost did in that booth… The memory of them together so close to each other brings blush to her face. She wanted to kiss Seulgi so badly but the moment was ruined. Damn fireworks.

Joohyun raises her head when she sees Seulgi’s feet stepping near. There’s this look again on the taller girl’s face that was there when she told Joohyun she was happy. She remembers how shy she became when she recalled Seulgi’s words from the park. 

“So…”

“So..?”

Seulgi leans down to look her in the eyes; Joohyun has trouble breathing. 
“Are you sure it was your first date?” She doesn’t understand what Seulgi is implying but nods, anyway. “I’m glad then. Because I’ll be the first one to do this.” After these words she leans in and softly kisses Joohyun on the cheek, just an inch or two away from her lips. 

She must have lost her goddamn mind because at Seulgi’s I’ll go now she just nods and closes the door behind her softly, leaning on it with wide eyes. What the hell just happened!? She, Bae Joohyun, a powerful woman, the CEO of one of the most influential companies in the whole country. Acting like a complete idiot because of some girl! 

(Okay, not some girl but an amazing, incredible woman, but that is not the point right now!) 

The point is that Joohyun is angry. She’s not sad or confused as to why Seulgi didn’t kiss her because she’s sure that she wanted to. She’s frustrated that Seulgi was straight up teasing her. That won’t do. Nope. 

She turns around and forcefully opens the door. Her words freeze in when she sees the other woman at the other side of the door with a raised fist as if she’s about to knock. They stare at each other for a what feels like an eternity. 

Joohyun doesn’t know who moved first because suddenly she’s inside the apartment with Seulgi’s soft lips on hers, with her back pressed against the door. The taste of the other’s lips, her scent and just presence in general are making Joohyun lightheaded. Fast, biting kisses slow down and turn into chaste, sensual once. Joohyun raises her hands to run through Seulgi’s hair. She almost whines when the taller lets her lips go. Soon after her almost whine turns into a moan when Seulgi moves to her neck.

She doesn’t notice how Seulgi’s shirt that she has been wearing falls on the floor.

--

Rays of sunshine fall through the curtains, making Joohyun opens her eyes. Usually, she really liked the sight from her bedroom window; parks, clean streats and the sky. The sky was so beautiful that she sometimes would wake up not long before the sunrise, and go to the roof with a cup of tea to enjoy the piece only a quiet morning could provide. 

But right now she can't seem to bting herself to move. There's this unexplainable warmth that's captured her whole being, her into this bubble of laziness and carelessness. 

Oh. 

Okay, maybe this warm feeling can be explained. Someone's spooning her from behind. There's a hand on her waist, holding her tight; Joohyun shudders when hot breath hits the back of her neck. This someone (though she perfectly knows who this someone is) grunts and brings her even closer, and she blushes a bit at the contact of their bare skin.

“Why are you awake?” A kiss on her neck. “It's still early, go to sleep. I promise I'll make you breakfast,” Seulgi mumble half-asleep, making Joohyun chuckle slightly. 

She takes the hand on her waist and connects their fingers, getting a squeeze as an answer.

“‘Kay.”

She thinks to herself before sliding into the world of dreams

The bed’s not cold anymore. 

Good.