October

October finally rolls around with an elegance and grace that you can appreciate, bringing with it autumn’s signature colored leaves that splatter across the trees like a beautiful mosaic, a collage of color. You’ve always found it ironic, how people find such beauty in dying things, but then again, it’s not like you’re any different.

Your relatives would always laugh whenever you’d make observations at familiar gatherings— not really in a bad way, they’d just call you ‘quirky,’ whatever that meant. You’d just shrug; you’d had a lot of time to think about these kind of things when you weren’t distracted by the nonexistent soulmate drawings on your arms.

For one reason or another, you end up waking exceptionally early on one early October Saturday. The sun is still rising, just barely over the horizon, so you decide to head out and take a walk to marvel at the school trees’ changing colors.

You don’t expect anyone to be awake at this time— it’s a Saturday, after all, and everyone sleeps in until at least 11AM (a good 6 hours from now) on these kind of days. But to your surprise, it’s Seulgi who’s stepping into the hallway in her long-sleeved jogging shirt and sweatpants, right at the same time as you, pretty cat-like eyes blink pleasantly as she spots you.

“Good morning, Irene,” she greets you first, softly, like she’s afraid to wake up the rest of the student body, even though both of you know that they’re sleeping like logs. “What are you doing up so early?”

“I’m not quite so sure myself,” you admit, never having woken up so early on a weekend before. “I just woke up for some reason, and couldn’t go back to sleep. So I decided to go see the pretty leaves outside.”

“Oh!” Seulgi brightens at your admission, and you raise an eyebrow in amusement. “I was going to do the same thing, actually!” She shrugs slightly, and it’s then that you notice the small leather backpack hanging over one shoulder. “I wanted to go out and draw the trees, so I set an alarm since I’m usually awful about waking up early.”

“You’re an artist?” Somehow, you don’t find yourself that shocked at the enthusiastic bob of her head. Of course the pretty long-sleeved girl from across the hall is a good artist. Perhaps her arms are so full of art that she covers them with her long-sleeves, because there’s no way that Seulgi has no soulmate... right?

“It’s just a hobby,” she says bashfully, and you smile. Seulgi is cute.

“Would you mind if I watch you draw, Seulgi?”

You’re just full of surprises today, aren’t you? You don’t know what made you take the leap, but if there’s something that’s true, it’s that while you and Seulgi are close enough to say hi every time you pass each other in the halls, you still know virtually nothing about her— and an entire month of school has already passed.

Seulgi’s eyes widen, but then a smile bursts across her lips, and you swear that you see a rainbow of colors in her smile. Seulgi is beautiful.

“I wouldn’t mind at all, Irene.”

~

You’re eternally grateful that your boarding school understands its students’ needs so well— if anything, the 24 hour coffee machine located in the center of each dorm floor is evidence enough.

“I think I’ll need some of that,” Seulgi says as you near the coffee station, and you notice the way that she rubs the last remnants of sleep out of her eyes. Her statement melts into a yawn, and you giggle at the way she opens like a baby bear. You’re still watching her in interest when she comes to, rubbing the back of her head out of embarrassment. 

“Yeah, I’ll definitely need some of that.”

You chuckle, understanding. You’re a morning person, and you’re not usually in desperate need for an energizing fix, but there’s nothing like a cup of coffee to start the morning off. 

“If it makes you feel any better, caffeine is my favorite drug too,” you say. A second later, you come to the realization that you really, really like the way that Seulgi’s eyes crinkle into prefect crescent moons ever time she smiles at you.

“The most addicting of drugs,” she agrees, though you almost don’t hear her. Nevertheless, you find yourself nodding along, even though you’re not quite sure what you’re nodding too.

You keep your coffee black, and you hide a smirk behind your cup, biting your lip before taking a sip as you watch Seulgi pour creamer and sugar packets into her own steaming mug, diluting the once dark liquid in sweetness.

“How do you drink it black?” Seulgi pouts at you after she’s drank a few sips herself. “It’s so bitter.”

You shrug. It’s a personal taste, you’d decided; something that you’d taken after your father, who drinks nothing but black coffee at home. Your mother doesn’t drink coffee either, so the house was typically devoid of anything extra that could go into the caffeinated brew. You’d grown to love it over the years, although looking back, you really hadn’t had much of a choice in the matter.

“It’s an acquired taste,” you say before eyeing Seulgi’s coffee, a light shade of chestnut brown. “Meanwhile, I’d go out on a whim and say that yours is too sweet.”

“It’s an acquired taste,” she mimics you, and the two of you share a laugh.

~

You finish your coffee and make your way out of the dormitory with Seulgi, and she holds the door open for you as you exit the building.

“Should we sit down and let you draw?” You ask Seulgi, cocking your head when she shakes her head.

“Not yet,” she says, nose scrunching and puffing out a cheek. “Let’s walk around the grounds first. Is that okay? I want to talk to you, and I usually get awfully distracted when I get into my sketches.”

You grin. “That’s more than okay.”

So you walk around the school grounds, at first talking about the leaves and how pretty they are during this time of year, before you pout and mention how the school council makes the students spend their community service day raking up the leaves once they’ve fallen.

“I mean, at least we miss class?” Seulgi says the statement like a question, furrowing her brow.

You shrug, laughing. “That’s the one perk, I suppose.”

It’s an easy conversation to fall into. Seulgi starts telling you about her roommate and best friend, Wendy, and her younger sister, Joy. You respond by telling her about Solar, and your roommate, LE. You even touch the topic of family, mentioning how you miss your younger sister, Yeri.

“That name sounds familiar,” Seulgi says, and you look at her in surprise. “I swear I’ve heard that name before, but I’m not quite sure where.”

After another five minutes of scratching her head, Seulgi drops the wild goose chase with a sigh and pout, promising to tell you when she remembers. Then, the conversation takes a mild turn to classes and classmates, to homework and projects that you vaguely remember doing during your freshman year as well, and you do your best to relate.

You talk about dance team, and how you were so happy when practices started up again a week ago. Seulgi looks interested at this.

“You dance, Irene? Me too! I was looking into dance team, but I wasn’t quite sure how...?”

“I’ll introduce you,” you promise her easily, mentioning how there hasn’t been an announcement yet, but freshmen auditions are coming up later in the month, and how they’re expected to come with a dance prepared. In the back of your mind, you remember that you’re technically not supposed to be telling anyone, since you might give someone an edge, but you figure that Seulgi can be the exception.

After all, you want her to make it into the group— not that you doubt her talent. It’s just that you want her in, no matter the cost.

It’s funny, how you’ve managed to open up to Seulgi so fast. Solar will probably ask for details when she shows up to the café where they’ve planned to meet for lunch, all tired and whatnot. You decide not to dawdle on the details for now.

Then you remember something.

“Seulgi, how’d you get close to Moonbyul?”

“Ah,” Seulgi tilts her head to one side, thinking thoughtfully. “We went to the same middle school. She and I were both in a dance group together for a little while before she came here.”

“Oh?” This is new information to you. “Basketball star Moonbyul used to dance?” Your mind races at all the possibilities for teasing your friend.

Judging by the look on Seulgi’s face, the younger girl has definitely told you a crucial piece of information that was supposed to remain buried for the remainder of their lifetimes.

You burst out laughing at Seulgi’s horrified expression as she clasps her hands together in a pleading motion.

“Please don’t tell her, Irene-unnie!” It’s the first time she’s ever called you ‘unnie’ and it’s out of such desperation that you can’t help but laugh harder. “Irene-unnie, please!”

You calm yourself down and pat Seulgi’s arm.

“I’ll withhold all information like I didn’t hear anything, so long as Moonbyul doesn’t pull any more cruel pranks on me like during previous years.”

Seulgi exhales. “Fair enough, Irene.”

~

You find yourself sitting out in the center of the school’s large courtyard, the entire grounds absolutely silently, saving for the scritch-scratch of Seulgi’s colored pencils on the rough surface of her sketchbook paper. It’s peaceful, being here with Seulgi. You like it a lot.

“You’re amazing,” you praise her, and she smiles at you, her pure white teeth gleaming. On her paper lies a prefect replica of these the beautiful trees surrounding you, sketched out in prefect alignment like the real thing. “Are you sure this is just a hobby?”

“It’s a passionate one,” Seulgi relents, and you chuckle, leaning over to watch in fascination. “I try to sketch something everyday, find some sort of inspiration everyday. I love my colored pencils.”

You hum in response. “Do you only use colored pencils?”

She pauses in her drawing. 

“Yeah.”

It makes you frown.

“Why?”

It takes a few seconds for her to respond.

“Colored pencil can’t really stain your hands too much. It’s easy to wash off if there are any stray marks.”

It’s your turn to be rendered speechless, and you notice how Seulgi crosses her arms, rubbing over the fabric, as if she’s cold.

“If it makes you feel any better,” you murmur, “I’ve never been able to use highlighters. It’s too easy for the ink to get onto my hands.”

You reach over and touch Seulgi’s left hand with your right, and she submits easily, allowing you to slip yours into hers.

“It’s kind of hard,” she whispers softly, letting a cool autumn breeze carry her words up towards the sky. “Sometimes I want to paint. I want to get my hands dirty. I want to finger paint and splash color all over my body. Maybe dive into a bucket of paint, see what it looks like.” She closes her eyes, and you press yourself towards her comfortingly. “But I don’t want to disappoint myself. So I don’t.”

“Sometimes,” you say in a low voice, “I want to get a marker and litter my arms with poetry, give myself up to the world. But... I don’t think that anyone’s going to read it, so there’s no point. So I don’t.” You say this to Seulgi and the sky, hoping that they’ll be carried on the wind up, up, up with Seulgi’s, so that they reach outer space and you never have to see them again.

Seulgi looks at you like she’s taken your secret and locked it up in her heart, looks at you so tenderly, so kindly that you want to scream. But then again, you’re looking at her back in the same way, sadly, softly, gently.

Bitterly? Sweetly? What does it matter?

In that moment, you know that you’ve found a friend. A confidante.

It’s an acquired taste.