(Myungsoo)

Our manager kept saying that none of the rumors is true, he apologized for the misunderstanding and promised the CEO that he'll make sure nothing like that will happen in the future. He even asked me to apologize.

I didn't say a word. I was thinking about the whole thing, everything.

Do I have to live like this forever? How long should I endure it and keep lying to everyone around me? It's been three years already. Is loving someone a crime? Is it really that bad? I don't want to do this anymore. Kim Myungsoo! It's time to man up and stand up for yourself.

"It's not a misunderstanding," I said.

The manager gave me a questioning look.

"It's all true. The girl in the picture is my girlfriend. I've been in love with her for three years. I think it's time to reveal everything. I don't wanna keep hiding this anymore. We've never been to an appropriate date all these years just because I was afraid of things like "rumors" and "scandals". Can you even tell me how is being in love with someone a scandal? I don't care about what's going to happen, I know that my fans love me so I'm pretty sure they will understand. I know they just want me to be happy, and I'm happy as long as I'm with Seo-"

"What in the world are you doing?" the manager cut me off before I say her name. (her face wasn't clear on the photos so no one knows it's Seol ah)

What I said made our CEO ever more furious.

"Who is she?" He asked with clenched teeth.

I was so mad that I didn't even think before talking. I know our CEO and I know that he's only running after money. He'd do everything to get rid of anyone who gets in his way and something like this may bring all the group down... But denying it may kill my relationship with Seol ah as well... Ahh, what should I do? 

I knew that this conversation wasn't  going anywhere, we were both so angry. So I just left the office without saying anything.

I could hear the manager telling him that he will talk to me.

(Later in the meeting room)

" WHAT? BREAK UP? ARE YOU KIDDING ME?" 

The manager: It's for your own sake. For Seol ah's sake. Even if you keep dating her secretly, he won't leave you alone. You already know what he is capable of doing.

" You know I love her more than anything else, do you really think I'll give up on her that easily?"

The manager: What about the other members? Don't you think that whatever you're doing now will affect them? And even if they'll be by your side and support you, what about your career? And your fans? Are all these things that meaningless to you? Do you think that your fans will accept that you're already in a relationship right away? They haven't even seen her face yet and they're all going crazy. Do you think they'll leave her alone after they find out who she is?

 "Ahh... I'm going crazy seriously." I scratched my head.

A day has passed and the members knew what happened and as expected they said that no matter what my decision will be they will always support me. However, I heard nothing from the CEO. He didn't even talk to me or did anything after what happened yesterday which made me suspicious. I'm sure he's planning to do something. 

We finished practicing around 8 pm. Today was a really long day. We were getting ready to go to the dorm when Insoo suddenly entered the practice room.

"It's not true, is it? I thought it was Seol ah..." He said looking at me with disappointment.

"What are you talking about?" One of the members asked. 

I was confused. "Seol ah? What about her?" I asked.

He didn't say anything, he just handed me his phone. 

[BREAKING NEWS] INFINITE L and MISS A's Suzy to collaborate on a duet love song. 

Rumors say that she might be the girl he was spotted hanging out with a few days ago. Netizens suspect they're dating.

Their fans couldn't be more excited, they were shipping them ever since the day Myungsoo said that she was close to his ideal type. And some other fans couldn't accept that he might be dating someone.

I knew he was up to something. I can't believe he did that without even talking to me. 

I went directly to see him. I broke into his office.

"Don't you know that entering into someone's office without knocking is rude?" He jokingly said.

"A duet? With Suzy? Are you serious? You didn't even mention it in front of me or any of the members. How is it already all over the news? Didn't you think that you should at least let me know first before doing anything like that? They even think that we're dating." I raised my voice.

"That's great. If you're that desperate to be in a relationship. You'd better be with the right person." He smirked. " That was the best way to cover up the rumors" he added.

"Are you going to decide who's the right person for me now? Suzy? Why her? How is she any better than my girlfriend? And you even want me to date her now? Over my dead body." I kicked the chair that was in front of me.

"Your girlfriend has just graduated from college right? She's even working here as a rookie songwriter. What a shameless brat. I gave her the opportunity that she will never even dream of. And that's how she's paying me? She must be too desperate to be famous. She's just using you. Suzy is the best match for you. She's successful and famous. And she's your type, right?" 

How did he even know she was Seol ah... 

"What did you just say? Do you think that everyone is running after fame and money like you? Say one more bad thing about and I'll-"

"You'll what?" He cut me off. "There is nothing you can do. I am the boss, remember? I can easily destroy both of your careers in a minute. You'd better get yourself together and do what I'm telling you before it's too late. I'm giving you one more chance. Your relationship better be over after two days. This is my last warning. And remember. You can never hide things from me. I have my own ways to find out every single thing. Oh! And get some sleep, Suzy is coming here tomorrow. For the duet. You can go now"  He firmly said.

(The next day)

I met Suzy today. She's so energetic and cheerful, I couldn't keep up with that but I tried to pretend that I was excited about the duet as well. At that exact moment. I felt hopeless, everything seemed pointless, I couldn't sleep. I felt like the whole world is against me. No matter how much I think, there's no solution. How can I break up with the person who made my life meaningful, how would I be without her? It was already 3 am. Everyone was sleeping but I was just staring off into space thinking about everything when I suddenly received a message. It was from her " You didn't sleep yet, did you? Are you okay?"

She always thinks of me. She knows me so well that she can even know that I'm lost in thoughts right now. She must have seen the news.

"I miss you." I texted her back.

"I miss you too." She said. I haven't seen her in days. And knowing that she's awake late at night thinking of me drives me crazy. I called her. She took too long to answer, it's so unlike her. I know she's holding her phone waiting for me to text her back, did she fall asleep?

"M-myungsoo yah.." She said with a shaky voice. I can hear her breathing heavily. 

"Yah Eun Seol ah? Are you crying?" I worriedly asked.

"No... It's just that I missed hearing your voice."

"Are you home now?" I asked

"Where else would I be..." She answered.

I quietly got out of the dorm, took the car and rushed to her apartment. 

She didn't sound well, hearing her trying to hide the fact that she is crying and pretending that everything is okay broke my heart. I needed to see her.

(Seol ah)

Myungsoo hung up the call without saying anything. He's not even answering my calls... I hope that everything is okay. I was still trying to call him when he finally picked up.

"Why didn't you answer my calls? Do you know how worried I am? What are you doing? Is something wrong?"

"Open the door." He said.

"What? what door?" I asked.

"Your door. I'm in front of it."

 I threw my phone away and ran to the door. Is he really here?

As soon as I opened the door he hugged me so tight that I thought my ribs would break. He then leaned his forehead on mine. "I missed you... I missed you so much that I couldn't wait until the morning to see you." He whispered.

"Are you really okay?" I worriedly asked.

"I'm good now that I'm with you." He said.

"You don't seem okay... I'll go make you some warm milk to help you relax." I headed to the kitchen.

After I warmed the milk, he was already lying on my bed. Holding the picture that was on my desk. It was the picture we took in that magical place we went when we first confessed to each other.

"That was a really nice day." He said, still staring at the picture.

"We should go back there someday," I said as I handed him the cup of milk.

"Let's make a lunchbox and go there as soon as possible. It's already spring. " He excitedly said, with a smile on his face. I wish I could see that smile more often.

''You've heard the news, right?" His voice became serious.

"Yes, I did... He's doing this the cover up the rumors, right? Because you once said she was your ideal type. That way it'll seem more natural..."  I said trying to make it sound normal.

"It's not what you..."  He looked down.

"I know." I gave him a comforting smile. "You don't have to worry about that, I understand. And I trust you. I'm actually looking forward to it. I'm looking forward to hearing a new song from you. I'm pretty sure it will be a hit."

He put the cup away and cupped my face. " Seol ah yah... Since the day I met you, things like ideal type didn't matter anymore. You're the only one I see, you're my ideal type. No matter how hard you try to pretend that you're okay with it. I know you're worried but trust me, you don't have to worry about anything. I promise that I'll never let you go. I love you." He kissed my forehead.

After I heard these words from him, I felt somehow relieved. 

But... but I was still afraid, worried and burdened. I felt like this won't last for too long.

We lied on the bed together, my head was on his chest, and his arm was around me. I could hear his heartbeats. I wish this moment would last forever. It felt like a dream, it was really peaceful. 

We both fell asleep while randomly talking. We were so exhausted, and even though we couldn't sleep earlier, being together made us feel too comfortable that we fell asleep so fast.

I woke up to my phone ringing. It was Infinite's manager. I was expecting that. I looked at Myungsoo and he was deeply asleep. He couldn't sleep well these days. I didn't want to wake him up so I just made him breakfast, left him a note then quickly headed to the company. 

As soon as I arrived, the manager was already there waiting for me. He said that the CEO will be here after an hour. And that he needs to talk to me briefly before the CEO comes here.

" So you're telling me to break up with him?" I said with an angry tone. 

The manager: We both know how stubborn Myungsoo is. He won't change his mind, and that will make both of you suffer. I know that you can convince him to change his mind.

"What did we do so wrong? Why all of you have to force us to break up? "

The manager: Trust me if it was up to me I would want you guys to be together but I'm afraid that it's not possible. I think you should leave.

" Leave? What do you mean by leave? so I cannot be here anymore?"

He sadly nodded.

"What about my career? What-what about me being a rookie songwriter here?"

The manager: Listen Seol ah... It's for your own good. He won't leave you alone. He'll do everything to provoke Myungsoo by using you. You'd better look for a better company. You're so talented and I'm pretty sure you'll get so much attention in the future. You've just graduated from college, there's a really long way to go. Can't you do that for him? Sacrifice? Isn't love about sacrificing for the sake of the person you love?

"I can't leave him alone... I promised to never leave him alone... "

The manager: You sure don't realize how bad this situation is. I didn't want to tell you this but... I guess I have no choice. If you don't do that... I'm afraid Myungsoo will have to leave the group. This is his first time disobeying the CEO and he's so mad at him. He's thinking about making him quit. He gave him one last chance but Myungsoo doesn't seem to take this seriously. 

"L-leave... Infinite...??" I was literally shocked to hear that.. How can someone be so cruel?

The manager: Yes... Are you worried he'll suffer because of you? Because you're his first love?

"How did you k-"

The manager: I know everything about them. And I do care about my members. That's why I'm asking you for this favor, I know you love him and I know you'll understand that it's okay if he feels bad for a while after you leave. It's so much better than losing everything he has worked on for so many years. He worked so hard all these years and he never complained about anything. Would it be okay for you if he loses everything because of you? What if he blames you later?

I couldn't say anything... He was right. My eyes were filling with tears. Is this really the end of uS? 

The manager: Think about it Seol ah. He won't be alone, he'll have me, Insoo, the other members, and Suzy.

"Su-Suzy?"

The manager: Yes. He has always liked her since his trainee days. He only talked about it once but I'm pretty sure that once they'll spend more time together and get to know each other more they'll get used to that relationship.

I was hurt. I couldn't bear hearing him saying all of that. I couldn't imagine seeing Myungsoo, the only guy I've ever loved loving someone else...

I went to the practice room all alone. I needed some time to think. I had to do something. I can't let Myungsoo leave Infinite... They are everything he ever had. He worked too hard I can't let that be a waste.

The only choice I have is to give up on us.. on what we have... Tears escaped from my eyes when I was thinking about all the time we spent together, all the good times, all the bad times, how would I manage to live without him...

I was sitting on the piano's seat. Just randomly playing around. "Oh wait! I found it. I think that's the best solution. I should go see the CEO now"

The CEO: Oh look who we have here. I was about to call your lovely boyfriend. He has to start saving money from now on. Or else he'll-

"I'm here to make a deal." I cut him off.

He let out a loud laugh.

The CEO: You want to make a deal you said?

"Yes."  I smiled.

(After few minutes.) 

The CEO: You're smarter than I thought. Fine, I'll give you what you want. You know what's gonna happen if you don't keep your promise, right?

"I know. I never break my promises." 

I got out of the office and let out a heavy sigh. "Please forgive me Myungsoo, I did this for you."