The door to the studio bursts open as Tiffany and Jessica walk in. I’m momentarily distracted by the beautiful smile on her face, eyes disappearing into crescents. I stop myself from getting lost in it as I often find myself doing, leaning back in my chair to smile lightly at them.

“Hey Fany, Sica. What’s going on?” I ask as I observe Jessica’s slightly worried expression directed at me.

“Taetae! I have some amazing news.” Tiffany squeals excitedly as she moves closer to me, before holding her hand out to me revealing the giant diamond now sparkling on her left ring finger. I hold my breath as my chest tightens, willing myself to just get through this. I catch Jessica’s sympathetic look over Tiffany’s shoulder.

“Nichkhun proposed Taetae!” Tiffany says happily.

I look up into my best friend’s expectant eyes as she unknowingly tears my world apart with her words. I knew it was coming one day, I was just hoping to be more prepared for this moment.

“Congrats Fany, I’m happy for you he’s a great guy.” I say, trying to keep my voice steady as she launches herself at me excitedly wrapping her arms around me as Jessica observes my reaction quietly. I mean it, when I say that I am happy for her, he really makes her happy, and that is all that matters to me. No matter how much it kills me.

I have been in love with Tiffany since high school, and considering she and Nichkhun have been together since graduation, I have also well and truly accepted the fact that we will never be together. Regardless of that, it still hurts, knowing that the person you love is going to spend their life with someone else.

I feel Tiffany loosen her grip on me as she looks at me expectantly.

“Huh?” I ask having completely missed whatever she said.

“I asked if you were free? Jessi and I are going out to celebrate.” She smiles.

“Oh, uh I can’t, I actually have a date tonight. Sorry Fany.” I lie, celebrating her engagement not something I was quite ready to subject myself to.

“A date?! Why didn’t you tell me Taetae? I thought we were friends.” She says pouting adorably, as my heart starts beating faster.

“I’m sorry, I forgot, I’ll tell you all about it soon I promise.” I say trying to change the topic as I grab my stuff getting ready to leave.

“You better.”

“I will.” I reply and with that she nods satisfied before waving goodbye and heading out the door. Jessica walks over to me after the door closes, squeezing my shoulder gently.

“You okay Taengoo?” She asks a sympathetic smile on her face. Jessica is the only one who knows about my feelings for Tiffany, I think she even knew about them before I did.

“No, but I will be, somehow.” I reply trying to smile. “now if you’ll excuse me I have a date to get ready for.” I add.

“Right, sure you do.” Jessica replies rolling her eyes lightly. “Call me if you want to talk okay.” She adds before heading out the door after Tiffany.

When the door finally closes once more I slump back down into my chair with my head in my hands.

……………………………………………………….

An hour later I find myself sitting at a bar on the other side of town with a drink in my hand feeling downright miserable. The night passes slowly, as the bartender c