Chapter 1

Cross my mind*

Baekhyun’s P.O.V:

 

Baekhyun was stomping out a café, pouting and ready to explode if somebody dared to speak about the triggering topic. Up until then, Baekhyun had been waiting inside for his boyfriend, constantly checking his phone for a text or a phone call from the latter. Baekhyun had been excited about their date since they hadn’t been hanging out together lately; they had been occupied with school and part-time jobs, which is reasonable. As a result, Baekhyun had been overjoyed when he saw his boyfriend entering the café.

Said boyfriend didn’t look nearly as enthusiastic about the date as Baekhyun had been. Baekhyun had tried to swallow down the dread he felt as his boyfriend approached his table… it was probably nothing. It’s probably just my imagination, Baekhyun had told himself.

Immediately when his boyfriend sat down at the table across from him and smiled at Baekhyun, he had known for sure something was off. Although Baekhyun hadn't understood what it was, he decided not to mention anything because it had been the first time in a while; he hadn't wanted to ruin the “mood”. They were conversing normally, but his boyfriend’s lack of interest had been so obvious during the conversation, that Baekhyun had to ask. Baekhyun had tried to hide the desperation from his voice, but it had failed. His boyfriend had simply avoided his eyes…

And that was when it happened.

His boyfriend had finally revealed the sad and pitiful truth: he had wanted to break-up because he had found someone else that he really liked and wanted to be with for a long time.

At this point, Baekhyun’s mind had gone blank. He hadn’t been expecting the sudden development; his short-term boyfriend breaking up with him, and to make matters worse, for someone else... It was a lot to take in. For a moment, Baekhyun had doubted that he wouldn’t be able to process the new information. It took several heartbeats for Baekhyun to continue functioning, to look at his former lover and to witness a walking time capsule… all their memories together, the good ones and the bad ones, all in one place, in the form of his past lover, suddenly flashing before Baekhyun’s eyes... all of that, gone.

It had been the end of their love story, of their happy ever after.

Luckily, Baekhyun had been able to process the new information because he had tried smiling at the person in front of him. Although it had failed and it had turned into a very big pout, Baekhyun had tried. A wave of emotions had overtaken Baekhyun's being, as the person in front of him had tried to calm Baekhyun down by trying to comfort him with useless words. Baekhyun hadn’t been sure at what he should be angry at; at the pity advice, he had been receiving from the person he least wanted to hear it from, or at the actual reason this had happened in the first place.

Baekhyun had chosen to be angry at the second reason, at his former boyfriend for falling in love with someone else while dating him. It had made the most sense to Baekhyun at the time. Furious, Baekhyun had stood up abruptly, ignoring the comments from the latter, who had been trying to calm him down and left the café.

And there he was now. Baekhyun was walking around aimlessly, not caring a damn where he ended because nothing else seemed to matter. His thoughts kept replaying the break-up repeatedly to the point that Baekhyun was starting to get tired of it. A distraction was needed, and Baekhyun knew who he could count on. He took out his cell phone and started dialing a number he knew by heart. As Baekhyun waited for his call to go through, he watched how happy were the people that passed by him. It was ridiculously childish of him, but he envied their happiness (nevertheless, he hoped they continued being happy).

Baekhyun waited a few solid minutes before the other line answered. “Hello?” the other person answered, “Baekhyun? What’s up?”

Rather than throwing another angry fit, Baekhyun felt his sadness sweeping in from behind accompanied by confusion. His eyes teared up as he in a breath, and all he wanted to was to see his best friend and tell him everything that happened to him. Surely, his best friend knew how to mend his broken heart. “Luhan!” Baekhyun cried out desperately, hoping that Luhan would pick up his distress.

Baekhyun and Luhan had first met each other during middle school for a school project they were paired up with. They clicked instantly and since then, they became best friends. They had even discussed living together in an apartment instead of the university dorms when they had sufficient money to pay the rent. In the end, it never happened; Baekhyun continued living in the dorms while Luhan started to live with his boyfriend, Sehun, at an apartment they bought together. Although Baekhyun had been pissed off at Luhan for blowing him off, his anger subsided because, at the end of the day, he was glad that Luhan was happy.

“What’s wrong?” Luhan started to say, but then Baekhyun heard his best friend hissing at Sehun for something, “Sehun, could you leave me alone for a ing second? I’m talking to Baekhyun on the phone!”

Then Baekhyun heard a faint complaint in the background. Luhan sighed at what Sehun had said, and continued with their conversation, “Sorry about that. Sehun was being unreasonably clingy today. Anyways, did something happen?”

Baekhyun breathed in and out deeply, willing his envy to go away because this wasn’t just anyone. He reminded himself that wasn’t why he was even upset in the first place… although it was hard to admit it to himself, it was even harder to admit it to Luhan. With his voice shaking, Baekhyun replied timidly, “Kai broke up with me.”

Luhan gasped before muttering what was a distinguished swear followed along with Kai’s name. Then Baekhyun could only hear different sounds coming from the other side of the cell phone as he waited patiently for Luhan’s answer. Several heartbeats passed until Luhan finally answered, “I’m coming over there right now. Where are you?”

Baekhyun could always count on Luhan for these types of things.

“I… I honestly don’t know where I am. I was at the café near the university and now I’m lost.” Baekhyun said, suddenly taking in his foreign surroundings. Thankfully, he wasn’t anywhere so shady because there were all kinds of people around him, even children. It still didn’t change the fact Baekhyun was lost. “Well, retrace your steps. That should work? If it doesn’t, I’m calling the police. I’ll be waiting at your dorm, okay?” Luhan said hurriedly.

“Okay… see you later.” Baekhyun said before ending the call.

Baekhyun figured that since he came from the café, the dorms had to be south from where he was currently. If it wasn’t around there, then he could ask some old ladies for help. With that thought in mind, Baekhyun set out south while suppressing depressing thoughts that had to do with a certain someone.

For a while, his tactic worked.

Baekhyun was so focused on finding his way back, that he didn’t notice that he ended up straying off from the dorms (again). This time, instead of ending up somewhere friendly like the first time, he ended up somewhere that was extremely shady. It didn’t help either that it was starting to get darker, and Baekhyun noticed the way people looked at him. It was uncomfortable, and not to mention, unsettling the feeling of being watched like he was a piece of meat. If only Baekhyun had someone around him to make him feel more secure… Baekhyun stopped the train of thought; he knew where it was heading to.

Baekhyun wasn’t wearing a coat, so he could feel the chilly night air swirl around his body and compress him in it. He needed to go somewhere warm and rethink his choices for now. Besides, Baekhyun wasn’t about to wait to be kidnapped like a damsel in distress by a random stranger.

He settled himself inside a bar because it was one of the few places still open after sunset, and because it was the nearest place by. Baekhyun had entered with other intentions in mind, but once he sat down on a stool, he wanted to drink the night away. I have a legit reason for wanting to anyways, he told himself. Depressing thoughts continued to loom around Baekhyun’s mind, feeding off his misery and negativity. It was starting to be exhausting the endless cycle of him trying to ignore his feelings…

The bar wasn’t too crowded, much to Baekhyun’s liking. There were some couples around the corners drinking as they laughed, while some old men were discussing work, most likely. Baekhyun laid down his head on the table as he let the inevitable happen, and thought back to when Kai and he were together…

It had been Baekhyun who had confessed in the first place. He had first seen Kai at the welcoming party in 12th grade when the latter had to perform a dance as the commemoration of a new semester along with the members of the Dance Team. There had been a silence amongst the crowd of freshmen, sophomores, and seniors as they waited for the show to begin… and then the spotlight had lit the stage, and everyone had cheered for them. The members of the Dance Team had been composed of the most talented dancers from their school, and Kai had happened to be one of those students. As the crowd had continued to roar for them, Baekhyun had been mesmerized by Kai’s smooth moves, that were, without doubt, results from fruitful training.

Kai had been unaware of the Baekhyun’s flushed face and heart beating rapidly because of him.

By luck, they had been placed in the same class and Baekhyun had almost celebrated in front of everyone. Baekhyun hadn’t approached Kai immediately, however, because he had thought he needed an excuse to talk to him. The opportunity had finally appeared before Baekhyun (it was another school project), and he had jumped at it. Baekhyun had talked as confidently and as friendly as possible at Kai, and they eventually had become good friends.

Time had passed, and they had graduated from high school. They both had decided to attend the same university in different majors, but Baekhyun had managed to make time for Kai. When Baekhyun had thought that it was time for him to confess… it had been mutual for a few months only, though. They hadn’t even lasted a year.

Baekhyun wasn’t really trying anymore to stop the tears because they were flowing out on their own. He ran a hand through his magenta hair and bit his lower lip so that a cry wouldn’t slip from his lips. Baekhyun was silently crying as he remembered all the great times he had with Kai during those short, blissful months. His heart ached with sorrow as he continued remembering, and a part of him wondered if his suffering would ever end… but it was then that Baekhyun noticed a beer was placed in front of him, and he looked up to see who it was.

It was the bartender who had placed it in front of him. Baekhyun couldn’t make out the bartender well; the latter looked like he had been blended in a giant painting due to the tears. He quickly wiped away the tears and saw that the bartender was smiling at him although very faintly. “It’s on the house,” the bartender said before turning around to continue his work. Baekhyun looked from the beer to the bartender, then back to the beer, and muttered a small thank you before drinking it.

The beer felt like a blessing from God. It was like a wave had washed over Baekhyun; it refreshed him momentarily, but it also slapped some senses into him. Although his sadness wasn’t gone, it had subsided for the moment, he couldn’t let it destroy him. That’s not the Baekhyun way.

He checked his cell phone and saw eight missed calls from Luhan. Baekhyun thought back to Luhan’s warning about calling the cops and decided that it was time to return.

“Excuse me,” Baekhyun called out to the bartender. The latter looked over at him, and Baekhyun immediately noticed his big, dark eyes. The bartender’s ears stood out in an awkward fashion, but cute, nevertheless, “Do you know how I can get to the university dorms from here?”

The bartender proceeded to explain that Baekhyun had to pass certain areas to get there and the areas that Baekhyun had to avoid in order to get there. It seemed easy enough for him to follow, so he thanked the bartender before getting off the stool. The latter smiled, but the smile didn’t reach his eyes.

Throughout the conversation, Baekhyun had noticed that the bartender had his shoulders slumped, his mind somewhere elsewhere. Baekhyun wouldn’t have felt okay leaving the bar without helping the bartender… the latter had been the one to wordlessly cheer up Baekhyun. It was the least he could do. Without thinking it twice, Baekhyun stretched out his hand and patted the bartender’s shoulder. The bartender looked up in surprise, his dark brown orbs confused at the sudden contact. Baekhyun simply smiled one of his Baekhyun’s smiles (which were very special. A Baekhyun smile never failed to charm anyone and cheer them up), and said “Thanks for that beer! Although it might not seem much, it made me feel better a bit. Whatever it is that you’re bombed out about, please cheer up! After the bad passes, the good always comes!”

And then Baekhyun left the bartender, who staring at him curiously before a genuine smile grew on his face.

 


 

Chanyeol’s P.O.V:

 

Chanyeol was heading to work with his shoulders slumped because he had been indirectly rejected by his secret crush. Although he had told himself repeatedly that it wouldn’t work because of two solid reasons, he couldn’t help but hope for a miracle to happen.

The first reason was that Chanyeol had never actually done anything to get his crush’s attention because they’re best friends. He didn’t want to ruin their relationship, and he didn’t want to risk their friendship over romance. Chanyeol had (somewhat) convinced himself that he was okay with just being friends. The second reason was that as soon they both entered university, his crush fell in love with someone else. To top it off, they started dating today.

On his way to work, Chanyeol greeted the owner of a café; it was an older lady that had taken a liking to him after one conversation. She always gave him some snacks when she didn’t have time to talk, and today seemed to be one of those days. The lady looked apologetically as she gave Chanyeol the snack, but he didn’t really mind since he wasn’t in the mood to talk. He continued walking towards his workplace as he ate the snack, and didn’t bother to shop anywhere else. Chanyeol wanted to arrive at his workplace and start working; he wanted to be distracted… The shops that were near the café led to a narrow alley, that led to somewhere else completely.

It was a rather shady place because of the few people that hung around the entrance, lingering and waiting as they watched your every moment. Chanyeol always walked passed them quickly just in case, and he felt as if he could never properly relax around them. No matter how much he disliked it, his part-time job was at a bar around there and the pay was good. Chanyeol needed the money so he didn’t mind so much working there.

As soon as Chanyeol arrived at his workplace, he began to change into his uniform. He was about to turn off his cell phone (it was a no cell phone zone) when he received a call from both his best friend and secret crush, Kyungsoo. Chanyeol hesitated to answer, knowing that if he were to pick up the phone call, Kyungsoo would tell him the details about the confession. He heard the confession from another friend of theirs (Kris), who knew about Chanyeol’s lame unrequired love for his best friend. Still, Chanyeol answered as cheerfully as possible, so that Kyungsoo wouldn’t feel off-put by his lack of enthusiasm. As he expected, on the other side of the call was Kyungsoo, overjoyed and possibly crying out of happiness because he had finally started dating his soul mate. A term, by which Kyungsoo liked to use when he referred to his crush, and that made Chanyeol want to vomit whenever he used it; it was so horribly sappy that he couldn’t believe his best friend would even say it.

Even though the sound of his heartbreaking into pieces was too much, Chanyeol played the role of Kyungsoo’s best friend anyways. He laughed and made jokes when it was needed to, he acted overprotective over Kyungsoo (which was real talk. Chanyeol meant it when he said that if Kyungsoo cried, Hell would break loose), and gave advice when Kyungsoo sounded discouraged. The latter thanked him for the support and Chanyeol couldn’t help but want to laugh at that, because he was the last person he should be thanking. A few minutes passed, and Kyungsoo ended the call. Chanyeol was alone once more with his surrounding dark thoughts…

At the end of it all, Chanyeol couldn’t blame anyone else except himself. If he really wanted to pursue a romantic relationship with Kyungsoo, he should’ve gone all out for it. The number of times Chanyeol’s had to make a move can’t be counted! Instead, Chanyeol continued acting like a hypocrite around the person he most cared about and had the audacity to want to blame it on anyone else but him.

The reality was this: It was Chanyeol’s decision to stand aside. These were the consequences of his decision and he had to live it with it whether he liked it or not.

When Chanyeol finished changing into his uniform, he turned off his cell phone. He went to the front of the bar and was pleased to see that there weren’t many customers that day. It was the usual amount of people that he didn’t mind serving for. In fact, there were very few people that Chanyeol recognized, and he immediately grimaced when he realized those were the people that tended to get drunk. He disliked dealing with drunk people because they tended to be unpredictable, and at times even dangerous. Chanyeol remembered that one time a lady was being d by one of the customers he recognized; Chanyeol had been the one to intervene and stop the drunk from continuing the nasty. Indeed, it had been troublesome to deal with…

Chanyeol helped cleaning dishes in the back of the bar; he always helped when he didn’t have any customers to serve. Then he cleaned some tables that were messy with food and spilled with liquor. When Chanyeol finished cleaning the tables, he served beer for some customers that requested it. He tried talking to the customers that were sitting at the bar; although Chanyeol wasn’t one to brag, he admitted that it had always been easy for him to connect with people. Kyungsoo liked to call him a social butterfly, and he couldn’t deny it no matter how embarrassed he got. Chanyeol liked being around people, not away from them, no matter how depressed he might feel… it was Chanyeol’s idea of distraction.

It was then that Chanyeol noticed the cutie with the magenta hair that was sitting at the far end of the bar, crying for some reason. It wasn’t the first time Chanyeol’s seen people cry at the bar, but it was the first time Chanyeol saw someone silently cry at the bar. There’s a difference, really, because Chanyeol usually has to calm them down before offering them a beer. People cry for different reasons, and Chanyeol’s in no place to say that some people shouldn’t be crying. Their reason is just as legit and real and problematic as others… but looking at the cutie cry made Chanyeol thought otherwise. It made Chanyeol sympathize with the cutie because he wasn’t the only one having a bad day.

Deciding that he wanted to the cheer up the cutie even a little, Chanyeol served him a beer and waited for him to take notice of him. When the cutie finally noticed Chanyeol, the latter couldn’t help but notice how lovely his eyes were (despite the tears). The cutie wiped away the tears, probably out of embarrassment, and Chanyeol tried to smile. “It’s on the house,” He managed to say, much to his surprise and the cutie. A few seconds later, Chanyeol heard the latter mutter a thank you, and he continued working.

Chanyeol often encountered people like him in the bar, who cried about their problems. They usually talked to Chanyeol about their problems, thankful that at least someone offered to listen to them complain.

But the cutie didn’t.

The cutie continued drinking his beer before taking out his cell phone. Chanyeol was keeping an eye on him, not out of precaution, but out of curiosity because he wanted to know. He didn’t want to just ask about it because what if it was too personal for him to ask about? Even though his curiosity was eating him alive… Chanyeol wanted for the cutie to talk to him when he was comfortable enough to do so. “Excuse me,” a voice called out from behind.

Chanyeol turned around and was surprised to see that it had been the cutie who called out to him. Damn, his voice was pleasant to listen to, “Do you know how I can get to the university dorms from here?”

As Chanyeol proceeded to explain to the cutie, a part of him focused on the fact that they went to the same university. He wondered why he never saw him around and remembered that Kyungsoo might’ve been the reason why. Kyungsoo was often in the kitchen of the university dorms, trying out new recipes on Chanyeol, who served as his guinea pig. He never complained about it before because Kyungsoo had a natural knack for cooking, and there had never been a failure during his “experiments” …

Chanyeol momentarily hated his active brain. When he finished explaining to the cutie the directions, he scolded himself for bringing up Kyungsoo. After Chanyeol had effortlessly distracted himself with work, it all came crashing down to discouraging thoughts that reminded him of how lonely he was. He hated how pathetic he was acting, he hated how much it was affecting him, but most of all, he hated how he couldn’t get it through his thick brain that it was his fault and no one else’s. Chanyeol knew it so well, and yet, he couldn’t apply it.

Then Chanyeol felt a pat on his shoulder and found the cutie smiling at him. If it hadn’t been because he wasn’t over Kyungsoo, Chanyeol would have fallen for the boy. His smile was so bright and so comforting that it seemed to light up the bar. Everything had seemed bleak, until that moment. “Thanks for that beer!” The cutie started to say now, “Although it might not seem much, it made me feel better a bit. Whatever it is that you’re bombed out about, please cheer up! After the bad passes, the good always comes!”

The cutie left afterword, and Chanyeol couldn’t help but curiously stare at him.

A stranger had cheered him up. Chanyeol knew he was smiling widely because there were still so many kind people in this big world. He suddenly felt very grateful to whoever the cutie was. Chanyeol hoped they would meet again so that he could thank him for his thoughtful words.

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