Yifan is nauseated, Jongdae is enraged, Baekhyun is appalled, Chanyeol is confounded, Sunil (or rather Minseok) is befuddled, Luhan is forlorn, Sehun is inebriated, Kyungsoo is reticent, Jongin is jubilant, Yixing is contrite, Zitao is somnolent, and Junmyeon is serene. 

One has diarrhea, one lost an item he covets, one took his mother's estrogen pills, one sat on his best friend's lap, one isn't Bengali, one just saw all of his hard work bite the dust, one is beyond tipsy, one's just there, one is finally getting laid, one gave another diarrhea, one has been chasing people around all night, and one is perfectly content. 

Yixing just ruined Yifan's inaugural press meet, Zitao just opened up Minseok's eyes, Baekhyun dragged Chanyeol across the floor, Kyungsoo made Jongin a very happy man, Jongdae and Sehun are sharing a flask, and Luhan and Junmyeon are smiling through the pandemonium. 

And Insu--well she's writing a Dulitzer-worthy article.