For some of us 'darkness' means a place

With no light.

You can make it disappear just by

Opening the curtains.

For others 'darkness' means a moment

With no hope.

You can make it disappear just by

Praying.

There are people who says that are words

With no meaning.

You can make it disappear just by

Finding a person to trust, to love.

For me 'darkness' means the disability to

See the world.

I can't make it disappear.

A person can live in the darkness

...Some minutes...

...Some hours...

...Some days...

...Some months...

...Some years...

...A whole life...

Just like me.

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Since I was born I've been embraced by the emptiness, the lack of love, the amount of hate and judge. With every day passing and the clock ticking every second lost I learned to embrace this darkness too.

From the start I've begun to acknowledge the harsh world to who I was introduced.

I was thought by the life that

You can lose someone you love in a second.

So we should treasure the persons who love us and try to protect them as they try to protect us from any harm.

I lost my mother in my first day of life. I didn't have that someone to protect, maybe that's why I didn't get ability of protecting because I didn't have a someone.

You should take any opportunity.

You never know if you'll meet another one and without knowing you lose an important part of life.

I lost the opportunity of having a warm meal because of my disability. Maybe that's why I didn't meet other ones because I couldn't take them myself. I couldn't make myself to move from the bottom I've been placed.

You shouldn't give up easily.

Between all those hard times it can be hidden something you would have never thought.

For me it was the reason it made think twice before of giving up. My only friend I ever had, Xing, my dog. I got him on my birthday of 16 years old. For the first time I felt that someone cares for me. I choose his name based on a known saying "You need the darkness to be able to see the stars". I didn't understand it until then. My little star which came shining my obscurity, Xing.

~..~

Unfortunately every moment has its end. Nothing can be everlasting, neither the happiness. There is no thing which is not measured by time, the time which flows past without a break. And slowly this time damages the present we enjoy replacing them with bitter memories.

But have you ever thought about why the time is so short when we are happy and passes so cruelly slow? I have always hated this 'time'. It's like a loan. I have borrowed some 'happy time' from it and it has taken it back leaving me the bad ones. Does this 'time' have something to do with the fate? Are they working together? If so, It's not fair. Why the fate agreed with the 'time' to lend to others more 'happy time' than 'bad time' and for me it gave me just the leftovers.

Am I hated even by the fate?

Or

The fate is preparing something special for me?

~..~

After the death of Xing I couldn't smile again. My old life was coming back. The beatings, the hatred, the insults, the tears, the feeling of emptiness was growing.

The persons who were forced by the law to take care of me went on a vacation, but they forgot something, more like someone. They forgot about me. I was used by this, but the only problem was that I couldn't take care of myself alone. My disability was forbidding me. I hoped, for the first time since I was a child I had the guts to close my eyes and hope that they'll come home and save me.

One whole day passed without me eating or drinking water.

Two whole days passed without me eating or drinking water.

Three whole days passed without me eating or drinking water.

For whole days passed without me eating or drinking water.

The only thing I remember before I closed my eyes and thanked the fate for the little part of happiness it shared with me was the tear which was felling down on my cheek.

 ~..~

Now I'm staying on a wooden chair with a cup of tea in front of me.

Just some minutes ago I've woken up.

Finally I can see.

I can see the bright sun.

I can see the colorful flowers.

I can see the green grass dancing with the wind at the base of tall trees.

I can see myself, the person I hated so much.

I've taken my first step from the bottom I laid.

For the first time I felt my legs moving to a better place.

The man in front of me has served me the sweet tea. The drink which will heal me.

''I know that you had a hard life with many downs and as little ups. But you were strong enough to accept what it had been given to you.

Maybe the fate wasn't on your side during those times,

But now,

You'll be the one who will enjoy the light the most.

You should leave now and learn to embrace the light.''

He is right, I should leave now and meet the happiness which no time will take it back because here the time can't reach me.

''Thank you for the tea.''

I opened the door and was meet with a familiar bark.

''Xing?''

''I forgot to tell you. The dog didn't want to leave until his owner would have come here. He waited a long time. You should hurry, I'm sure he wants to play again with you.''

I looked at the men in black. I smiled and closed the door after me. I can't believe, I am able to see my friend, after so much period of time, he is right here, in front of me. I started to run with him until we arrived in a beautiful garden with many other children in white clothes. I looked at my reflection in a river and saw that I am a child again and I am wearing white too.

I tried to remember why I am here, but I couldn't remember anything. All I know is that now I am with my Xing and that he wants to play. That's all what meters.