Always and Forever (Jensoo)

 

A person in love, with just a small glance of the person she loves, with just that one quick glimpse of her brighter than gems smile, and it only takes a split of a second for a spark to electrify their hearts as the simple touch of their lips meet. They can keep counting more moments, endless small moments yet bring them joy as one and all these simple but treasured moments, when collected, can lead into eternal love. It’s the road to forever as they say, an endless promise of a lifetime love, the moments of togetherness, the worsts and bests, the great and small times.

 

But… in this unfair world, this unjust reality of love that either breaks them or make them, while they count moments, any second ahead isn’t guaranteed. Forever, this promise, is it the best or the worst for them?

 

Every moment counts, and for this another typical morning for this lovely couple, where she wakes up slowly in her small single bed et feeling the head of her beloved ones resting on her chest while she lets her listen to her morning heartbeats, the beats that pump loud for her only, this is just one of these moments she loves to take note, plant it again in her heart, this moment they always have but cherishes every single second of it within deep in their hearts.

 

As the curtains fly from the opened windows with the help of cold morning breeze, her beloved ones in her brownish bed hair and her baggy black pajamas moved, cradling closer to her humming her name, “Jisoo… five more minutes please…”

 

She giggled at her husky morning tone and finds herself wrapping and protecting her around her arms, using her small petite body like her lover to guard her but not with her black hair that’s neatly tied. “Sure, sure… I’ll be here always and forever… my precious Jennie~” She then hummed in a long deep breath with her warm smile.

 

Forever, this one word… a word that never failed to shake Jennie’s heart whenever she hears it coming out of Jisoo’s gentle lips. As much as the word brings eternal meaning for both of them as a couple, Jennie, when this word comes, she couldn’t help but to be awaken only to frown at the deepest thought of it, get distracted and end up ruining momentous times with Jisoo. This word that feels so heavy for Jennie’s heart to handle that she can only sigh, Jisoo though never missed the chance to notice this change of Jennie’s mood, no matter where her eyes are looking at, no matter how happy they are, she would sense Jennie’s drop of enthusiasm because of this one word.

 

“Jennie…?” Jisoo voiced out, repositioning herself to look at Jennie’s face that she still somewhat tried to cover using her long hair. She cupped Jennie’s face and closely she asks, “What’s wrong?”

 

This question always come out from Jisoo over and over again, and never she stopped asking it right after the mention of ‘forever’ from which is as well Jennie wouldn’t left unnoticed. This has been always happening and both lost count already since when it started but surely they know, it will keep on going with this obvious avoidance. Peeking through the strands of her hair covering her face, she can see the worry and concern in Jisoo’s eyes, a bit of fear and a sprinkle of disappointment.

 

However, as always, Jennie will only shake her head and covering her frown with a forced out smile that hasn’t failed to soften Jisoo she says, “Nothing. I’m fine. Perfectly fine. You know, I easily get speechless when you get sweet with that word…”

 

“Really…” And this is all that Jisoo can also answer always with a suspicious nod on her sugarcoated words. “…then, are you free tonight?” She then asked with a beam.

 

“No… sorry. I have to meet my parents and talk about work and stuffs.” Jennie pouted as she saw that sweet smile on Jisoo’s lips disappeared in an instant.

 

Sulking, Jisoo slowly sat up on the bed and mumbled, “I see…”

 

“I’m so sorry Chichu~ I’ll definitely make it up to you next time. I promise I will. I’ll treat you on a fine-dining romantic dinner, go on a drive and just simply going around the city at night then you can come here again and spend the whole night with me. How’s that?” Jennie quickly followed Jisoo as she went off from the bed and carefully embraced her from behind before she could even grab her coat resting on the chair.

 

Jisoo laughed merrily as she turned around to face the confused and still pouting Jennie. With a quick stolen kiss, she hissed closed to her lips, “I’m just kidding. I know and I understand. And yeah, a romantic dinner and a drive with you on the night streets would be good. I’m looking forward to it.”

 

Likewise, Jennie stole a quick peck and chuckled, “Finally, you’re allowing me to treat you for meals. Thank you and seriously, I know you’re tired of hearing this but how can I thank you enough for all these things you’re giving me? Your love, your care and your support…”

 

Jisoo immediately thought of an answer inside her mind that her heart has been also shouting for. But as she doesn’t want to break this moment yet again with her words she believe are careless oftentimes, she just wrapped Jennie once again in her embrace and whispered, “Just you beside me is enough because I love you so much and I’ll do anything for you… you know that.”

 

Jennie smiled and not long she returned the embrace that’s warmer than Jisoo is giving her and also whispered back, “I love you too… and it will never change. I promise.”

 

Indeed, they have always been in each other’s arms all throughout the years, through the ups and downs. Neither let go during the hardest times and neither got blinded by light during their best times. Everything seems so perfect, everything seems so good as they go on for more moments, more times, more love and more efforts for each other. However… as they proceed and go on higher steps in their relationship, something’s still holding them back.

 

“Hey unnie~ why do you look so gloomy all day? Are you alright? Even some of our customers have been noticing you’re not looking good recently. Did something happen?” Someone gently tapped Jisoo’s fragile shoulders which startled her from wiping off the last table occupied.

 

It’s one late evening of the next day and throughout the day, Jisoo is spacing out from her work, even until this very moment she’s helping her comrades in closing this small restaurant where she works as a waiter. Compared to the good old days when her relationship with Jennie was still starting fresh, those days that all she can do all day is to smile and frequently brag her lover to some of their casual customers, lately is the other way around.

 

Jisoo sat on the edge of the table and grips tight on the wet cloth she’s using to wipe the tables as she responds in a sigh, “Chaeyoung… what should I do?”

 

Her comrade whom she named Chaeyoung raised an eyebrow confused, joining Jisoo on the edge, “What do you mean by that? Please be more specific. Something happened, isn’t it?”

 

Jisoo heaved a deeper sigh looking straight down the tiled floor, “It’s about Jennie…”

 

“I knew it.” Chaeyoung snapped. “So, did you guys fight? I also noticed she’s not dropping by to visit you anymore, especially these past weeks… or maybe months?”

 

“It’s not that we had fight, only that I’m feeling kind of lost lately as if she’s not telling me something or as much as I don’t want to think of it, now I can’t avoid but to think of the possibility that she’s hiding something from me which has been making feel so lost and incomplete. I know I shouldn’t say this that these days, despite of us being together and enjoying quality time together, there’s a part of me that can feel she’s not being herself and that she feels so distant from me. I don’t know if I’m just overthinking or whatever or I can be crazy now too overanalyzing things but I can’t help it. I keep asking her what wrong is but she would give me that smile and I don’t know anymore.” Jisoo said and in between her words she lowly grumbled as she clenched her fists tighter.

 

“A lover’s instinct, huh? What a great love you have there for her unnie. Well, that really happens especially when you know her so much that every action of hers are very well noted in your heart and you can notice the slightest change her. Then soon it gets oddly suspicious… it really happens…” Chaeyoung commented while she searches for the right words to tell her older companion by looking up the ceiling.

 

“I see forever in her after all. She’s the only person I want to spend my whole life with.” Jisoo slightly smiled to herself at the thought of Jennie’s sweetest smile yet so far to completely ease this burden hitting her hard.

 

But breaking it is Chaeyoung’s remark, “You can promise her forever but it seems like you’re also going to wait forever unnie. She hasn’t answered to your proposal, right? Do you even remind her about it unnie?”

 

This brings Jisoo into her deepest thoughts that her surrounding turned into a blur and only memories of that particular day she proposed flashes back to her mind, that day she was rejected, yet politely by the person she offers her life to. Truly, this puzzles Jisoo but never she showed her slightest disappointment to Jennie, rather she beams and flashes her smile in hopes of finally get a sweet yes from her. However, as times goes by, Jisoo never heard a response.

 

“I don’t want to force her.” Jisoo lowly replied to the point her voice almost cracked. “I admit too that I expected her to say yes that day, only to get a no from her. Nevertheless, I’m still here for her and I’m not giving up just because she said no once. I don’t know her reasons are but whatever it is, of course I want to know too but at the same time, I’ll let her tell me and not make her tell me.”

 

Not wanting to get the conversation get too deep until such time Jisoo finds herself crying, Chaeyoung laughed all of a sudden to break the ice stuttering, “W-well… as long as the both of you know that you love each other… t-this kind of distance you’re feeling shall pass too right?”

 

Jisoo faintly smiled, “Yeah right. It’s just one of those challenges again I think. And how about you by the way, you and Lisa, are you guys doing well? She’s not being so stubborn right? Tell me if she’s hurting you and I’ll choke her.” She then added as she shifted the attention to her.

 

“Ah, don’t worry about that dumb unnie. She may be dumb but I love her.” Chaeyoung beamed and it was then her phone started ringing. A huge smile formed on her lips and shows her phone to Jisoo so thrilled, “See, and speaking of Lisa, now she’s calling… she went to the hospital to visit some friends.”

 

Jisoo pushed Chaeyoung away from her, acting disgusted of her simple clinginess towards her own love and said giggling, “Go talk to her. She must be worried for you too since we’ve been having overtimes. You don’t want her to get suspicious of you going back home late so you better not hide anything.”

 

“I know unnie. Thanks…” Chaeyoung winked.

 

Jisoo watched Chaeyoung back as she walked out of the restaurant, standing in front while she manifests happiness through her genuine smile, those sparkling eyes of hers that speak of true deeply in love and her restless gestures she only establishes whenever she hears Lisa’s voice and feels her presence. Certainly, Jisoo wishes them contentment but envy inevitably flows into her veins as so far, Jennie hasn’t sent her any message, no calls… nothing…

 

“Maybe she’s tied up at work… and besides this isn’t the first time. I’m sure she’ll call me later on.” Jisoo concluded to lighten the burden all by herself.  

 

Unknown to Jisoo’s knowledge as she continues on ending up her work inside the restaurant, is Chaeyoung’s conversation with Lisa. Smiles, funny stories and sweet cheesy pick-ups lines come here and there which make Chaeyoung blush hard with her huge laughter and these are what Jisoo can see from the view but… there could be more… more than what Jisoo would want to know…

 

After sharing enough laughter, Lisa takes a break as she recalls, “Oh by the way, I saw Jennie-unnie earlier with her parents at the hospital.”

 

Chaeyoung creased her eyebrows as she stepped farther away from the shop then questions, “What? I mean, what do you mean? Do you know why she was there? As far as I know Jennie-unnie hate hospital scents, which is why she even hates going for yearly check-ups or even passing by around.”

 

“That’s what I thought too!” Lisa hissed. “I got confused earlier too that’s why I tried to follow her secretly but I lost them in the elevator. She’s crying though, that’s what I’m sure of since I saw her face clearly.”

 

“I wonder what’s going on and I doubt if Jisoo-unnie knows something about it.” Chaeyoung worriedly sighed as she looked back on the seemingly clueless Jisoo finishing her work.

 

Later that night, almost lifelessly, Jennie walked towards her room, ignoring her parents’ call as she locked the door behind her. She dropped her weak body straight