Breathe in. Breathe out. Again. Sharp breaths while running through this lonely part of the city because THEY found me and THEY were coming to kill me. I looked back a few times, panicking and expecting one of the men right behind me. But there was no one, I had gotten rid of them - at least I hoped so. Damn it, was there nobody in this godforsaken place who could help me? So I kept on running away, hoping for a miracle or, to start with, a place to hide and rest a bit to overthink my situation.When I turned a corner my hopes were fulfilled because there he was:

"DEAN!"

He looked at me puzzled, with surprise in his eyes. He obviously did not expect to see me here but came closer anyways, furrowing his eyebrows.

"What happened? Why are you so out of breath Sara?"

"I... I can´t... THEY are coming!... HE..." I inhaled a few times and tried to calm down my trembling self.

I noticed how Dean scanned me from head to toe so I looked down too and understood why he suddenly seemed concerned: My t-shirt had a big slit across my waist and one sleeve was ripped too, I had dust all over my black skinny jeans and probably on my face too as well as a cut on my cheekbone and my lower lip.

"HE knows where I am so HE sent THEM to kill me!" I exclaimed; panic in my voice no matter how hard I tried to hide it.

Dean just grabbed my arm and, looking around carefully said: "My place is only two blocks away so you can stay there for now and recover a little bit. I´m here, okay? I´ll protect you." I sighed with relief and followed him.

That´s what I liked most about him: Dean was a friend who wouldn´t ask too many stupid questions like "What do you mean?" "I don´t understand it" "Who are THEY?" - He just did what was necessary and happened to always be near when these... incidents occured.

Once we had reached his apartment, he just gestured towards the bathroom and handed me one of his white longsleeve button-down shirts.

"Feel free to take a shower, I´ll get the medical kit."

I happily accepted his suggestion and quickly washed off all the dust and fear and danger. After putting on his shirt I slipped out of the bathroom and found Dean sitting on the couch, ready to treat my cuts and bruises. I twitched slightly when he applied alcohol from a half empty bottle of vodka with a cloth onto my face.

"I know it burns but just one more cut and we are done." he smirked.

"Thank you." was all I could manage to say, feeling suddenly so weak and heavy as if the whole world was weighing down on me. Dean got up and looked down at me.

"Uuhh... I hope the couch is fine for tonight?" he scratched his neck a bit awkwardly. I just gave him a tired but thankful smile.

"Sure. Thank you! Thank u so much..."

Taking the bottle of vodka from the table he replied: "Okay, goodnight then." He bit his lip, then turned around and left the room.

I lay down on the couch, gazing around the small room. I had never been to Dean´s place before, in all this time we already knew each other. There was the low table with old newspapers and magazines on it, an empty bowl and waterbottle, sneakers on the floor and some film and music posters on the wall, a laptop hidden under stashes of books on an armchair. I stared at the glow of the streetlights shining through the half-drawn curtains and heard the occasional car passing by before finally drifting off to sleep.

But in my dreams THEY appeared again, THEY came and brought my past with them, haunting me and giving me no rest. LEAVE ME ALONE I wanted to scream, but couldn´t. I had had no other choice back then, when I was lost and despreately in search for someone or something protecting me and allowing me to survive, even if that meant crossing the border between legal and illegal things.

But oh how hard it was to escape this circle. The price you had to pay for leaving them, taking with you all their secrets, all the knowledge that gave you, was high. It meant fearing for your life, not sleeping, finding no rest because there was no escape. HE would find you and HE would make sure you´d never lose a word about them.

Never. Ever. Again.

Sometime in the early morning I was lying on the couch, half awake and half asleep, with thoughts appearing and disappearing again in my mind. How odd, I thought suddenly, that Dean was ALWAYS near when I needed to escape THEM. Also what was his job anyways? I couldn´t remember him telling me... But I was way too exhausted to further think about all this, it just popped up in my head and was gone the next second. I sighed and turned around, hoping to get some more sleep.

I woke up to the sound of someone speaking on the phone. At first I didn´t know where I was or what had happened but then the memory came back. Then I recognized the voice, it was Deans. He spoke silently and careful, as if he wanted to make sure I wouldn´t wake up. I smiled but the smile faded when I caught some sentences.

"Yes she´s here... No, no I haven´t... not yet. Are you sure about this?...Yeah I know... I know it´s my job... Okay, I´ll get this done by today. Could be a though one though, she´s stronger than I thought... Mhm, I´ll do that... Alright... Yes, no witnesses... Goodbye Mr. Kim!"

I got up in a bolting movement and finally it occured to me. Could it be that Dean was working for - THEM? Slowly and carefully, I made my way into the hallway, looking around nervously. I spun around when I heard Dean say from behind me: "Don´t move!"

I looked at him and gasped, not able to say a word. I just stood there and felt like my whole world was falling apart. He had a gun in his hand and aimed it at me, while grabbing a thin rope from a chair beside him. "Turn around" he ordered, his voice cold and sharp.

He then tied my hands together on my back and pushed me towards the door, down the stairs and outside of the building. Always close behind me, Dean led me around the corner of the house to the backyard: Dusty ground, a fence that separated this yard from the next one and brickwalls with old grafitti on them, but no way to escape.With the gun in his hand, he pushed me towards one of the walls that met the fence.

"Stand over there. And don´t even try to get away!"

I stumbled a few steps to where he said and turned around a few meters away from the wall. Spinning around I faced him again, my mind empty and full of thoughts at the same time. I could read absolutely nothing in Dean´s face, as if he had closed the book that contained his mind and sealed it with a high security lock. The sky was covered with grey clouds but the air was still warm. Wind came up and blew through my hair and the shirt I was still wearing from last night. Finally the words started flowing out of my mouth, I just couldn´t stop myself.

" Why are you doing this? Tell me! I thought I could trust you, I... I don´t even know why I believed that! You... you were the only person I felt safe with and now... you... how can you do this to me?!"

Tears started to stream down my cheeks and I could not even wipe them away. I hated looking this weak but at that moment I did not even care anymore. Dean was still looking at me, his face still unmoved and emotionless. Frustration, anger, pain and sadness rushed through me as I kept yelling and crying.

"I thought I knew you, I thought I meant something - something to you... I thought THIS meant something! How could I be so stupid, so naïve? How can you do this to me? WHY are you doing this, please tell me, I don´t know what to believe anymore... You can kill me but please tell me the truth..."

My legs were shaking and eventually I sank to my knees. "Please just tell me... Please..." I added silently, lowering my head.

I did not look up until I heard Dean´s voice: " The truth..."

He was standing right in front of me, the gun no longer pointed at me. He kneeled down with his legs touching mine, lifting my chin up with his fingers so I had to face him.

"The truth is..." he began again, then paused, cupped my face and kissed me softly.

I felt his warm lips pressed against mine, my mind and heart racing like crazy. Was it possible to die of sudden heart failure? What did this mean? Was THIS the truth? I did not want to give in but my resistance grew weak the longer and deeper his kiss got. He caressed my cheek with his thumb and tucked a strand of hair behind my ear. It felt honst, it felt like I had finally found the truth as we knelt on the dirty ground, kissing and breathing and the rest of the world was so damn far away, time became nonsense.

Suddenly Dean pulled away, his gaze still focused on my lips. With a trembling voice he quietly said "If HE finds out, I´m dead..."

I smirked a bit and answered "At least we´ll be dead together!"

An idea seemed to spark in Dean, his eyes lit up and he pulled up me to my feet. "Come on, let´s go!"

"But where?"

He just gave me a little smile and said "Somewhere. I don´t care." He then untied my bonds and dragged me into the house again, upstairs and into his appartement where he began to throw random stuff into a large bag.

"Look behind the armchair in the livingroom and get the bag that´s there!" he advised me and I did so. When I opened it I saw green. Green bundles of banknotes. It was more money than I had ever seen in my life. I returned to Dean, an unbelieving look on my face.

"Where... where the HELL does this come from?"

He took the bag out of my hands and murmured "I was partially payed in advance for... for THIS job and I´m not too sure if THEY will pay the rest as well so I figured we take what we have, don´t you think so?" He grinned and added " By the way, maybe you should change into something more... decent. You look a tad distracting for me..."

He had a point there, so I took off his shirt and put on my jeans and one of his t-shirts that I tied up at my waist with a knot.

"Okay, let´s go!"

Dean grabbed my hand and the bag he had packed and hastily we ran down the stairs and headed towards the garage. He threw the bag onto the backseat of his old sportscar and we both got inside. With slightly trembling hands, he got the keys out of his pocket and looked at me before starting the car.

"Are you ready?" I looked back at him and all the feelings I had for him rushed through my mind and flooded my heart. But only one word came out of my mouth "Yes."

We pulled out of the parkingspace, the windows rolled down, on our way to nowhere. As he spead up on the highway, the wind blew through my hair, the rest of the world was so damn far away and time became nonsense.