Chapter 1 ~ Yoongi POV

They say it takes a lifetime to recover from killing someone. 

If this is true, Yoongi would need more lives than he could keep track of. 

Not that he enjoyed killing; quite the opposite, the death toll in his mind growing after every perilous mission like a time bomb ready to explode; shrapnel of sleepless nights, intoxication and complete decay burying itself into every nerve of his body. 

He could see it coming; each death a whisper, a nudge towards insanity, but he couldn’t let that deter him.

“The operations are too important” he whispered to himself “I can’t let everyone down, I need to keep going.”

Solo jobs were always the most difficult for Yoongi, despite the fact that the rest of Bangtan were waiting right outside as back up; it would never quell the veracious fear and guilt that simmered in his stomach whenever he had to confront the enemy alone. He knew he had to do it, even if it wasn’t morally right; he had a duty to fulfil, a job to do. But that didn’t stop empathy and remorse seeping into his thoughts every time, clouding his actions in hesitance and doubt before he inevitably pulled the trigger, leaving another dirty smear on his conscience.

That’s what he hated most about these missions: they made him human.

He was “Suga,” leader of Bangtan, one of, if not the most notorious gang in Seoul, infamous for violence, cruelty and human trafficking. 

He had a reputation to uphold.

He wasn’t allowed to be human. 

~

Seconds after, smoke still seemed to pour from the barrel of the gun as the victim fell to the floor, the thud leaving an eerie aftershock in its wake, a sensation that in his 7 years within a gang Yoongi had felt often, but would never get used to.

The usual routine followed; scoping the area for any other rival gang members, looting the corpse for valuable resources and destroying any and all evidence that anyone was ever here; the whisper of gunshot, screams and pleas meticulously wiped away along with the blood sweat and tears pooled on the floor.

Wasting no time, he switched on his earpiece, which up until this point he left turned off, listing off commands and orders immediately for the rest of Bangtan to follow. It was a strict routine, one that held fatal consequence if messed up.

“Namjoon, have you checked all entry points?” 

“Every single one and they’re all clear, there’s no one in sight” Namjoon reported curtly with militaristic prowess, earning a sigh of relief from Yoongi, yet laced with discomfort.

Usually the enemy would have back up, or at least threaten to; it was rare for a gang member to turn up alone. 

Something was wrong. 

“Okay, just stay where you are, I’ll tell you when it’s okay to come in.”

He began to walk cautiously over to the corpse, tiptoeing so not to leave even the smallest dent on the damp floorboards. Even then his footsteps seemed to echo against the hollow walls of the abandoned house, every creak adding to the ticking metronome of impending disaster.

It was quiet; too damn quiet for Yoongi’s liking.

Something bad was about to happen. 

They had to hurry.

 “Hoseok, any sign of anyone in the outskirts?” asked Yoongi, a sense of urgency invading his tone that he desperately tried to supress. 

He couldn’t show fear or weakness, even to his fellow members. 

“I’ve checked everywhere and there’s no one here,” replied Hoseok. “We’ve got the all clear for once thank god, I don’t think I could face another attack like last time,” the smirk of relief evident in his tone, contradicting the ever-growing foreboding feeling Yoongi couldn’t seem to shake.

This news was supposed to be comforting. 

It only made Yoongi feel worse.

“Okay thanks Hoseok, stay exactly where you are until I give the order okay?”

“You got it boss.”

He glanced over the corpse, taking in the victim’s appearance, the skin already turning a shade of pale that could never be mirrored in any living person, the faint blue veins producing a ghostly hue, the only evidence of life previously lived, the vibrant hazel of his eyes morphing into dull brown.

Shin Hoseok. 

More commonly known as Wonho, 2nd in command to MonstaX, a small gang dealing mainly in weaponry to those who wanted it for self-defence; many would consider them one of the most innocent gangs out there as long as you didn’t make them angry.

Oh boy was this going to piss them off.

He had to be killed; it was non-negotiable. 

He was a witness to one of Bangtan’s missions about a week ago, consequently one of the most crucial missions in the gang’s history:

Secrets were revealed. Never to be revealed again. 

Especially by a gang so closely affiliated with the enemy; MonstaX had established a strong companionship with them almost a century ago, despite being so small in numbers. Soon, they became one of their biggest suppliers of arms and still endorse them to this day. 

It was the worst case scenario. Yoongi couldn’t let the news spread.

It wouldn’t just destroy him, it would destroy everyone and everything around him, all the work he put in becoming debris sprinkled on top of the mess his life would become. He could never let that happen.

Wonho had seen too much. 
He was a liability.
He had to be dealt with.

Fishing through the contents of his jacket pocket, Yoongi retrieved the latex gloves, slipping them on carefully to ensure no tears or breaks were made, then began searching the body from head to toe. As he gingerly slid his hand into one of Wonho’s pockets, he could feel the sharp hilt of something prodding into his palm. Warily, he drew it out, revealing a small pocket knife, and despite its hefty weight he held it gently in his hands, reminiscent of the clutch when holding a tiny animal. It was fairly mundane, just a wooden handle with no special designs, yet something about the shape and the weight felt oddly familiar, as if the indentation of his palm was made for the knife; his fingerprints a mark of home. 

He studied it; growing more intrigued the longer he looked, wondering why something so ordinary could feel oddly comforting when he finally came across the leather cover, a faint “sorry” occupying one of the edges. It was barely legible; most people would never notice it, yet it still caught his eye. He couldn’t help but ponder why such a message in such illiterate handwriting was necessary. Why were they sorry? What did they do that was so terrible that they wrote an apology on a knife?
However, he had a job to do, and he couldn’t let his fickle intrigue get in the way. He slid it into the waistband of his jeans thinking of it no more, just relieved he didn’t have to solely rely on ammo as his only weapon, then focused his attention back to his team waiting outside.

“Jin, can you see any enemies south side?” 

“There’s not a soul,” said Jin, carefree as ever. “In fact I don’t think people even know this place exists.” 

Relief seemed to wash over Yoongi, finally sure that they were in fact alone, dismissing most of his previous anxiety as just paranoia. He trusted s, and knew they wouldn’t make such a rookie mistake as not checking an area properly. He knew they were truly in the all clear.

“Okay Jin, just stay where you are for the time being, and I’ll…”

“I mean it’s strange isn’t it?” Jin continued, leaving Yoongi a little stunned at such a rude interruption. “You would have thought a gang member going to meet a member of Bangtan would have brought back-up, surely that’s just common sense?  I just don’t understand why he didn’t have any defence at all, that’s just stu…”

Twigs snapping could be heard faintly in the background of the audio, accompanied by light footsteps that seemed to grow louder as the seconds passed.
“Jin, what’s going on, is someone else there?” Yoongi asked, his fear increasing as the silence stretched out for what seemed like years.

“It can’t be,” Jin replied, his fear blatant as he spoke. “I checked everywhere there’s no one else out here, it’s just not possib...” 

Muffled screams filled the audio, causing Yoongi to cry out in shock, his prior panic flooding back.
“Jin?”
..
“Hello?”
“Jin can you hear me?!”
..
“Jin what the what’s going on?