It was one of those days. Myungjun hated to admit it, but these days were coming more and more often. Though normally he’d just sit and do nothing all day, he had asked Jinwoo to spend the day with him and to talk to him. Oblivious, Jinwoo agreed.

The day would start without Dongmin insisting the others get up. He had too many solo events. Moonbin, Minhyuk, and Sanha were always practicing dances or hanging out together as the maknae line. They’d always ask if Myungjun or Jinwoo wanted to come, but they’d always decline. There’d be a few jokes tossed around.

“Ah, MJ-hyung and Jinjin-hyung are becoming old men~ don’t want to go out anymore,” Sanha would tease, and Myungjun would play along. It was his job. To be happy, to make the other’s happy. What a horrible, horrible burden to have to carry. He carried it well.

“Hey! Be respectful. Jinjin and I have to talk a lot about promotions… While you are goofing off, we’re working hard for the advancing of ASTRO, and for the love of AROHA!” Myungjun insisted, although he didn’t take Sanha’s teasing too seriously, and made sure to show that through his pursed lips and amused gaze. Jinwoo nodded to all the words Myungjun said, humming in agreement.

Moonbin nodded softly, his voice quiet as he spoke. He was always the most direct, just going out there and saying what he felt rather than beating around the bush. “We just miss hanging out with all six of us. You know since Dongmin is gone… I don’t know… it seems like we’re not as close anymore. I miss all of us being together.”

The slow rapper spoke, getting up to gently pat Moonbin on the back. “It’s hard without Eunwoo but he’s bringing the success of ASTRO and love of AROHA, and we must not fall behind. Let’s work hard. You love dancing, so go practice. You’ll be even better next comeback.

The leader’s words brought satisfied smiles and bright eyes among the maknae line, a collective and determined “yes!” coming from the three as they all said their goodbyes.

Soon, the dorm was quiet, and Myungjun and Jinwoo sat on the couch.

Silence dwelled in the dorm.

The atmosphere kept Jinwoo from asking Myungjun what was wrong, instead just waiting.

Myungjun took the time to think about all the things he pushed back. Like opening a floodgate, it rushed at him. Even if he had tried to push the thoughts back again, he would’ve failed. He surrendered himself to it all. He let the thoughts surround him. It was unbearable, suffocating, like smoke. To Myungjun, it felt like his lungs were shrinking, like the oxygen he breathed in wasn’t enough. The smoke-like silence… it filled his vision, stung his eyes. His vision blurred, and hot tears fell from his eyes, leaving tears that felt like they burned his cheeks like trails of fire. The smoke from these trails of fire made his eyes sting more. He cried more.

His companion-in-suffering wasn’t much better. Seeing Myungjun let his tears come brought his own. He, too, lost control and let everything he let build up crash down on him. Soft whimper-like sounds came from the leader, his lips quivering as he tried to hold back his crying. He pulled his legs up to his chest, resting the heels of his feet against the couch and leaning his shoulder on Myungjun’s shoulder, who leaned his head back on Jinwoo’s.

They sat like that, and cried for so long, until their tears ran out. Their sniffles carried on, mixed with the heavy breathing that comes after the sobbing. Eventually, with red and puffy eyes, they calmed down. It was Jinwoo who first overcame the sorrow-filled silence.

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