Being an idol does have its perks. A lot of free clothes. New. Modern. Imported from different countries. Straight from the runway. Concerts in different countries. Malaysia. Australia. Japan. And not just that. You also receive a lot of love.

Love.

Yooa snorts.

Love.

L.o.v.e.

Four letters. Four simple letters and yet love isn't simple at all.

Stretching her fingers, Yooa lets out a loud laugh, pretending to follow the conversation that is going on between the host and Hyojung right now. Playful banter. Hyojung's shy smile. Obviously studied in front of the mirror in their practice room over a hundred times. Now, it's perfect.

All of their smiles are perfect. Just the right amount of teeth showing and eyes crinkling up.

Aegyo.

Yooa hates it.

“Just pretend that you're having a blast,” someone whispers into her ear quietly. Yooa doesn't even have to turn to figure out who it is. Sweet, soft voice. Mimi. Mimi. Mimi.

Leaning back in her seat, Yooa takes a discreet glance at the girl sitting next to her.

The one with brown locks and dark brown eyes, the color of chestnut somewhere in between, hazel maybe and oh god, how many times did Yooa try to figure out the color of Mimi's eyes, staring at her intently and for a long time?

“I am having a blast,” Yooa whispers back while leaning closer to her group mate. Too close for just a random remark. Too close for just group mates. But no one notices.

Sometimes, Yooa wants to do that. Claim Mimi. Ruffle her hair in public. Put her arm around her waist. Carry her on her shoulders. Kiss her. Something completely ridiculous so that everyone knows that they shouldn't come too close.

Something like that.

“And what about you, Mimi?” the host suddenly asks, smiling his greasy smile.

“We heard some really interesting rumors about you and B1A4's Jinyoung. Care to share?”

Mimi smiles her smile. Giggles a bit. Puts her hand in front of . Eyes crinkling. “We're just company colleagues,” she explains with a blush that had been practiced for at least as many times as the giggle. “Nothing more and nothing less. That's all I can say.”

It's moments like this, Yooa hates it. Getting linked up with random celebrities. Attached to them. Getting swept up in nonsensical dating rumors.

It's ludicrous.

And whenever Mimi goes along with it like this. Smiling. Giggling. Blushing. Even though it's all fake and all of them know, Yooa finds herself getting annoyed, regretting ever introducing them to each other.

The thing is about Yooa, it's hard for her to stay quiet. To pretend. She hates those fake smiles and fake laughs and fake giggles. And ambiguous statements especially.

**

“That's all I can say,” she parrots, imitating Mimi's words from before. They're sitting in the black and small company van. Like sardines, kind of. It's not cozy but stuffed.

Mimi frowns at that. “What was I supposed to say?” she asks. “They want something juicy. It's good for getting our comeback into the headlines.”

Yooa rolls her eyes at that justification. “That's especially the coverage we don't want. We're supposed to be innocent little girls dancing around in frilly clothes, not mature woman. If you're so eager to start dating go join Snsd or something.”

She glances at Mimi after that. Her group mate's eyes are watery.

Wait,a second.

Watery eyes.

A hurt expression.

'Go join Snsd or something.'

. Yooa in her breath after registering the meaning of her words. She didn't mean to say that. Didn't mean to say that Mimi should leave the group and join another one.

. She has crossed a line. She has definitely crossed a line.

Quickly opening , she forces out an apology. “I'm sorry”, she utters. She knows about Mimi's insecurities. She knows about the girl feeling as if she doesn't deserve to be in the group. Yooa knows that Mimi feels like she's lacking talent, looks and charisma.

, she knows everything about Mimi.

Before she can say anything else, apologize once more, Mimi's phone lights up. Yooa glances at the identity of the caller.

Jinyoung.

Isn't the timing just perfect?

She rolls her eyes and looks at Mimi who's still frozen in her seat. Immobile. Pressed against the upholstery.

“Just take it”, she says. Mimi does.

“Hello, sunbae,” she whispers into her phone. Yooa's heart aches.

I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry.

“No, I'm on my way back from a recording for a TV show.”

Mimi shuffles in her seat and Yooa pretends to ignore it.

Just like she pretends to ignore the entire conversation.

“Yes, it was fun....No, I haven't- I'm sorry, sunbae, we're almost here...”

Yooa rolls her eyes again and gets out her phone. Does something meaningless. Pretends to be distracted. Pretends that she isn't listening to their conversation.

**

What Yooa can't do, is pretend that something's fine.

Because something obviously isn't fine.

So, she sticks to parallel lines.

“Your footwork is completely wrong,” she barks at Mimi. Mimi, who had just moved the wrong foot after two straight hours of practicing. Mimi, who looked awfully distant the entire time. Mimi, who takes phone calls from Jinyoung.

“Completely wrong?” Mimi repeats. Disbelief. Frustration. Pain. It all mixes in her eyes. Her expressive eyes. Like a potent concoction. A cocktail of emotions showing behind the hazel.

Eyes to Eyes. Parallel lines. Yooa isn't really mad because of the wrong steps.

Then the connection breaks. Mimi tears her eyes away. Breaks away. Disconnects.

And then runs out of the practice room.

It's silent for a while. The kind of silence that permeates the air. Thick silence. The kind that weighs on your shoulders and your head and your heart and sticks to your skin.

Then Jiho speaks up.

“Are you gonna continue acting like that?”

“Like what?” the harsh reply comes. “Like a normal idol who can't risk her career because one of her group mates wants to date?”

Jiho's eyebrows shoot up. A knowing smile appears on her face. “So, that's what it is about...”

The smile turns into a smirk. “You're angry because Mimi could possibly be dating Jinyoung, but never you.”

**

It seems like a normal performance until Mimi stumbles and falls. Yooa notices it first. How couldn't she. Immediately, she stops dancing and drops down to her knees, staring everywhere at Mimi's body, checking for any wounds, injuries, signs of pain. Mimi's ankle must be twisted.

The playback continues in the background. Somewhere in the distance she can hear the shuffling of the other girls, but when she see's Mimi's pained expression, she doesn't hesitate. Not for a second. She sinks down even further, turns around and bends her back so that Mimi can climb onto it.

And she does, eventually, with a sharp hiss leaving . Yooa grabs her leg. The other one. The good one. Pulls it closer until Mimi must be in a comfortable position. In her peripheral she can see Hyojung's worried expression, the crowd, the manager, but she just runs through the backstage door and to the van.

“Should I call the paramedics?” she asks with urgency as she lets Mimi sink down into the seat. Mimi just shakes her head quietly.

Yooa bites her lip. “...Jinyoung then?”

Mimi lays her head against the upholstery. A breath escapes . “How did you even get this idea?” she asks with a frown.

“What idea?”

Mimi shrugs, putting her foot on the seat. All thoughts about the performance have left their minds, “The idea of me and Jinyoung.”

Yooa doesn't even have the strength to roll her eyes. Ironically, it's her who feels weak when Mimi is hurt. Who's heart aches when she sees Mimi with her twisted ankle.

“It's not just an idea now, is it?” Yooa's heart constricts in her chest at the memory. “I heard your call, remember?”

Mimi turns to her, a lopsided grin on her face. “You know what Jinyoung and I are talking about...?”

Yooa shakes her head. Does she even want to know?

“He gave me tips on how to impress the girl I like.”

A meaningful glance.

Yooa points at herself. For the first time in forever, speechless.

Yet the unspoken question gets an answer.

“Of course it's you.” Mimi smiles. “Who else could it be?"

A/N: Epilogue? Yes? No?