final

diving head first (into love with you)

 

 

There's a swarm of trainees and families backstage after the live broadcast ends, all rushing to hug and congratulate each other. Jihoon is in the midst of it all, until the tears become a little too much for his heart to handle and he steps out into a more vacant area to calm his heart.  

Amidst all the trainees, there is one specific person that Jihoon searches for. Pushing his way through all of the cameras and staff, he spots the red head entering one of the smaller waiting rooms. He checks behind him multiple times to make sure there isn't a Jinyoung insight. When he finally gets to the end, he peeks into the room and sees Woojin sitting against the wall with his head down. 

"Hey," Jihoon makes his presence known, quietly stepping into the room. Woojin looks up at him with a small smile. 

Things are still awkward between the two, ever since the morning after they slept in Woojin's bed. Once they woke, they saw Daehwi and Samuel snickering at the top of the stairs with a phone out and pointed at them. The two scrambled out of each others arms and sputtered out excuses, as if they were caught doing something much worse. 

After that morning, Jinyoung came up to him with a multitude of questions, and mostly whining about losing his chance to blackmail him since Daehwi basically talked to everyone about how 'cute' they looked. Jihoon didn't know whether he should be thankful to Daehwi or planning his death. 

Either way, things definitely started to change between them. They haven't gotten a chance to discuss it, since Jihoon is practically running away from Woojin every time there's a possible opportunity for them to be alone.

It's not that he's doubting his feelings, those are loud and clear to him now. With the way his palms were sweating and his heart was racing that night, there's no way he can talk himself into believing that this is anything less than a crush. Rather, he thinks that the younger had never meant to say what he said in a romantic way. 

Well have you seen yourself?

The words constantly echo in Jihoon's head, twisting his heart and constricting his breathing. The weight of his feelings grows heavier, the pressure increasing so much that he thinks his ribs could collapse at any time. Jihoon knew feelings would be a struggle, but this kind of torture isn't what he expects. It's difficult as to so much as look at Woojin without wanting to dive head first into a pool and stay hidden at the bottom forever. 

He thinks that would be much less painful. 

But despite his countless attempts to avoid the younger, today is a happy day for them. As much as Jihoon is scared to be upfront with his feelings, he remembers the delight he felt when Woojin's name was called. There really is no hiding from him anymore. The thought of facing him now is debilitating, but Woojin is just as much as friend as he is a crush, and he owed him some answers. 

So he works up the courage to stand in front of Woojin, alone in the waiting room, red-faced and dizzy with worry. 

"Hey," Woojin looks right at him, and he feels even more light-headed, "so you're talking to me now?" 

Jihoon's stomach churns with guilt. He hates not talking to him, he hates not being able to hear or see him laugh, and he hates making it seem like he hates him, which is funnily enough the complete opposite of his true feelings. Not that it's obvious to Woojin, Jihoon is definitely making it hard for him to see that. Jihoon looks down at his fidgety hands, unable to look Woojin in the eye, "I'm sorry."

"Did I do something wrong? Were you uncomfortable with what everyone was saying about us? Because I'll tell them that you're not okay with-"

"No!" He blurts out so quickly its almost pathetic. Woojin is confused and Jihoon doesn't know what to do. "It's not that I- I was just.. I don't know, scared?"

"Of what?" Woojin's voice is soft and Jihoon wants to burst into tears but he holds them back. 

There's no getting out of it now, he thinks, bracing himself for the outcome.

"I'm scared that if the more I'm around you the harder I'll fall and the more difficult it will be for me to get out of this mess. At first I didn't think much of how I would purposefully make mistakes in dance practice so I could spend more time with you, or how I'd try to snake my way into a conversation you were in just to see if I could be the reason behind your laugh, or how I'd block out everyone else's voice during our fake karaoke nights to single out yours. But then that night things started to become so real and it hit me all at once and now we're in the same group and I have to see you every day and how do you stop liking someone when you see them every day? So I thought that if I distanced myself my feelings would fade and you wouldn't have to be uncomfortable around me and-"

"Jihoon," Woojin interrupts him before he can pass out from the lack of oxygen but all Jihoon can think about is how terrified he is of what he might say next, "Why didn't you just talk to me about this?"

Jihoon takes a deep breath before he responds, "I know that talking with you would have made this situation easier to handle. You'd tell me you don't feel that way for me and I'd put my feelings away before they could grow and in time maybe we'd be okay again but since I'm already being really honest here, I hate the thought of only having to think of you as a friend.." Jihoon's voice is shaky and hushed, with his eyes shut somewhere in the middle of his outburst. He feels the words lodged in his throat, clinging to the roof of his mouth as he tries to force them out, "I hate the thought of not liking you." 

Jihoon stops himself this time because he's near fainting and has to grab onto the door handle to steady himself. He's breathing harder when he finally makes eye contact with Woojin. The silence in the air is thick and heavy and Jihoon wishes that it would engulf him already. 

After what feels like almost an eternity later, Woojin is striding towards Jihoon with a strange glint in his eyes and Jihoon thinks that he should probably close the door behind him. 

In one swift motion Woojin has Jihoon pressed up against the door, their foreheads together and heavy breathing synchronized. Woojin inches closer, breath ghosting over Jihoon's lips and God, Jihoon could not get any dizzier. 

Woojin's voice drops low, in the exact way that makes Jihoon go crazy, "And I hate the thought of you thinking I don't like you." 

"W-what?" Jihoon squeaks, his knees feel wobbly and Woojin's hands on his waist are the only things keeping him upright. 

Woojin is moving excruciatingly slow and Jihoon isn't entirely sure what's happening but he can't take it anymore.

"God, just kiss me already," Jihoon whispers exhaustedly. Woojin chuckles and finally closes the gap between them. 

The kiss is soft and slow, Woojin is being so gentle with him it becomes impossible for him not to melt. Jihoon feels so fragile under his touch, as if Woojin is scared that one wrong move could break his already frail state.  

They pull apart slowly, foreheads still pressed together. Jihoon goes even more red, if its even possible to attain such a shade, and burns holes into the ground while squirming under Woojin's intense gaze.

"Hey, Park Jihoon." Woojin asserts, his left hand on his chin bringing their eyes back together. 

"Hey? I am older than you by six months!" Jihoon challenges, staring at him hard and unwavering (not really). The pique in his eyes dissolve when Woojin smirks at him and he's back to awkwardly darting his eyes around the room, looking at anything but Woojin. 

"I like you a lot. Like, a lot a lot." Jihoon blinks in bewilderment at Woojin's words, as if he hadn't already kissed him to make it obvious. "So please stop running away from me."

Jihoon is screaming in his head because here he is with Woojin, his crush, in a cramped waiting room and he's being pressed up against a wall, centimeters away from him and Woojin is telling him that he likes him. And not in the you're a great hyung kind of way but the same way that Jihoon feels about him. 

He bites down on his lower lip and nods slowly, still trying to process everything. Woojin smiles softly at him and Jihoon's heart skips a beat or two. The younger continues to look at him affectionately and Jihoon's not sure if he should be saying anything else. Although he's pretty sure that Woojin is getting a good kick out of his fidgeting. 

The teasing is agonizing and Jihoon doesn't want to talk anymore he just wants to kiss him again. Hooking his hands around the back of Woojin's neck, he crashes their lips together. It's sloppy and amateurish but Jihoon couldn't care less. Jihoon grabs a fistful of Woojin's hair and tugs slightly, sparking the more aggressive side of Woojin. Woojin's hands are wrapped around Jihoon's waist, pulling him closer and backing them up into the wardrobe behind him. 

Jihoon marvels at the thought of the universe finally being on his side, until a loud, booming voice manages to pull them apart.

"JIHOON HYUNG! WHERE ARE YOU?"

The two exchange glances and Jihoon sighs in exasperation, letting his head fall onto Woojin's shoulder. Woojin, though also slightly bitter, chuckles and wraps his arms around the older, squeezing him tightly. 

"You should probably go find Daehwi before he finds us."

"Can we just go back to kissing?" Jihoon pouts shamelessly and it almost works on Woojin but his resistance is strong.

"Maybe later." The younger sends him one of his signature winks, which he jokingly gags at (but he's really dying inside.)

Jihoon nods dispiritedly and attempts to flatten down his uniform before he pokes his head from out of the room. He steps out, hoping his flushed appearance is less obvious by now. Daehwi is walking towards him with an "oh hyung, there you are!" and Jihoon's eyes widen at his proximity, scrambling towards the door to stop Woojin from coming out, but he's too late. Daehwi barely finishes his interrogation on why Jihoon was in the waiting room alone when Woojin goes to stand beside Jihoon with a small "oops", and Daehwi is scanning them over wide-eyed, gasping, and then yelling for Jinyoung.  

Jihoon runs his hand through his hair and turns to Woojin, "Since you're Daehwi's labelmate, I'm obligated to ask for your permission before I kill him."

"Go for it."

 

 

 

 

A/N: fkghfkdjgh i love 2park so much that its overwhelming. i hope you don't mind that i'm here to accommodate for the drought of this tag, i will literally flood it in the future.

 

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Chapter 1: This is so cute XD
SmLovers #2
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