Jongin didn’t know what to do. He was physically and mentally drained, all he wanted was the world’s longest nap. His mind was constantly on Jiyoon. Junmyeon had told them that the wouldn’t be at practice in the evening, so the group was without their leader.

He was stressed, to say the least, and the only thing he could imagine calming him down was Jiyoon. Jiyoon was the only person he ever wanted to be with, and now he was twenty-eight, alone, and still in love with her.

He stayed late after everyone left, practicing because he was the only one lacking in this dance. What was wrong with him? He was usually one of the strongest dancers and now somethign was holding him back. Why was he letting Jiyoon hold him back?

“Jongin, just go home.” Junmyeon stood against the frame of the door.

“No,” he sighed, “I have to get this down.”

“Go home, Jongin.” The second voice stopped him in his tracks. He stopped and looked over, seeing not only Junmyeon, but Jiyoon. He couldn’t even move. Her hands were in her jean pockets and he felt like his world was caving in.

“I told her everything, but she doesn’t remember everything. Be careful, I’ll see you here tomorrow.” Junmyeon threw his jacket over his shoulder and walked away. Jiyoon still leaned against the door frame, running her fingers through her hair.

“Jongin…” She looked at him. “I want you to go home.”

He was speechless. What could he say? There was nothing coming to his blank mind and he had to refrain from running to her and hugging her. She didn’t remember him.

“I can’t do that.” He shook his head. “I have to practice.”

“Show me.” She shrugged. “Show me the dance and I’ll tell you if you can go home or if you need more practice.” He blinked a couple of times before he nodded. Jiyoon hadn’t seen him dance in years. She didn’t remember him dancing.

He nodded slowly before he moved to start the music. She sat down on one of their chairs and watched him. Even without remembering anything, she could tell he’d been dancing for years. Even his worst was sharp and precise and she loved it.

“Jiyoon, let’s dance.” He grabbed her hand, pulling her with him. The campfire crackled and all she could think about was how her heart hurt being so close to him.

She could barely understand what was happening until her back was against his chest. He was just tall enough to rest his head on her’s. His arms were wrapped around her and she awkwardly placed her’s over his.

She allowed herself to lean back into him.

She wanted this to be all the time. She wanted Jongin to hold her like he had throughout the summer all the time, but she knew she had to leave after this time ended. The feeling made her heart sink into her stomach.

She loved him so much that it made her want to stay. She wanted to give up everything for him and that terrified her. Jongin terrified her, but not because she thought she would get hurt. She knew he would take care of her.

He was the only one who made her feel that way.

He was the only one that could make her feel that way.

“Jiyoon?” He whispered.

“Hm?”

“Would…would being in love with me be a bad thing?” He asked her, quiet enough so nobody else could hear him. “Did you think my reaction meant that I wouldn’t be okay with that?”

“Of course it wouldn’t be a bad thing, Jongin.” She told him. “It’d be a bad idea to fall in love with you now.” She heard him sigh and she felt horrible. Why couldn’t he see how much she loved him?

She was about to say something when he started to move away from her.

“I’m…I’m really tired.” He said quietly. “I’m gonna go to bed.”

“Do you want me to come too?” She asked.

“No,” he shrugged, releasing her from his grip, “wouldn’t want them to think we’re in love or anything.” Her heart broke in her chest as she watched him walk away. She wanted to follow him so badly but she knew it wasn’t a good idea.

She loved him, and she was losing him.

Could she handle losing him?

He walked up the steps of the porch and the looked over his shoulder. They made eye contact and she felt her eyes sting from the air and the water slowly welling up in them. The two families didn’t seem to be noticing this.

Was he saying goodbye?

Was that her last chance?

She sat back down on her chair for a while, her knees up to her chest as she had Jongin’s sweatshirt covering her legs as well. She couldn’t take her mind off of him but that was okay. As long as she always remembered him, she’d be okay.

She eventually went inside, walking into their shared bedroom. She looked at him, fast asleep in his bed. She couldn’t help herself - her instincts were to climb into his bed next to him and be as close to him as she possibly could be. She gently put her arm over him and buried her head into his back.

She had to be awake another few hours before she fell asleep.

The song finished and she watched him fondly. He turned to her and she stood to hand him the water bottle, which he took gratefully. He must’ve downed half of it before he looked at her.

“Do you really not…?” He trailed off. She nodded slowly.

“I started remembering a little.” She told him. “Junmyeon told me everything and then I said we should come here. It was my turn to find you.”

“I’ve missed you,” he said, surprisingly calm. He looked as if he was in shock. He knew she couldn’t say it back, but he didn’t want her to. He wanted her to know that she as all he held onto the past four years.

He walked closer to her, not bothering to say anything as he pulled her close to him. His head rested on top of her’s as she wrapped her arms around him. She was confused when he reached for her hand until she realized what he had seen.

Her heart broke once she felt his fingers trace over her wedding ring. She’d worn it for so long that she didn’t even realize it was there anymore. He slowly moved away from her and although he knew it wasn’t her fault, he couldn’t help but feel heartbroken.

“Jongin, I-”

“You don’t have to explain anything.” He attempted a small smile. “I should’ve been there for you. I should’ve taken better care of you.”

“That’s not…that’s not all.” She looked down at her feet, letting out a deep breath.

“What is it?” He asked softly, almost like he didn’t want to know.

“I have a daughter.” She watched as he turned away from her, running his fingers through his hair. She was one hundred percent certain at this point that Jisoo was Jongin’s daughter. There was no doubt, seeing his face now and comparing it to her daughter made her realize even more of the similarities.

She watched while he buried his head in his hands, shaking it slowly as he came to terms with what he just heard.

“I’d always wondered where she got her lips from, her nose, even her eyes.” She told him. “Considering Jaeseok doesn’t have those qualities, nor do I.”

Jongin tensed, and he turned back around slowly.

“And then I saw the article, about the two of us. I knew something was wrong with the story my parents and Jaeseok told me because there was no way I would ever cheat on someone, but there I was, with you, looking more in love than I ever thought possible.” She shook her head, a scoff leaving her lips. “I can’t believe that after everything that Jaeseok had done, that they still let me think I loved him my whole life. I’ve never loved him, Jongin. I guess I didn’t know that was because my heart still wanted you, whether I remembered it or not.”

Before he could say anything else, she pulled the rings off her finger and walked over to the trashcan, letting them fall from her hand.

“I don’t remember everything, but I remember you. That’s enough for me.”