There were times when I believed that all kind of things called ‘love’, was just a metaphor . ‘Real love does not exist’ I always said that. Even if it exists, it will not last long. Couples broke up, families bond torn apart and also friends stabbed each other’s back. I longed for a real love, so much so that I would not feel empty anymore. Before, no matter how much I try, it seemed like I could not find one...until

“BOO”

Hmm?

What are these hands doing pulling my ears?

“Kookie-yah, what are you doing?”

I can say, that was an obviously stupid question.

“Don’t you see that I am fishing here, hyung?” my sarcastic answer was given towards the owner of the hands.

“Ah yes..heukheukheuheuheuk” I really don’t get it why he would pull out his wiping laugh.

“Seriously, what are you doing? Hyung don’t have anything to do right now. The others already passed out after the award so I command you to play with me. Don’t ask me to sleep because I don’t want to...yet,”said Jin-hyung.

This hyung, even if it is already past midnight, he looks so energetic.

“I’m trying this new game made by our fans, To The Edge Of The Sky..It is still on trial, I mean, it is just a demo..so far it is good but I really wish that they insert some real fighting scene of the characters,”

“Like an action game?”Jin-hyung asked me.

“Well, it is half-action half-drama... do you want to play this too?”

“It’s okay, hyung just want to watch you playing,”said him. Alright, so I just reset everything and name the main character again.

“Yoonji? Aigoo JK, I thought that you had moved on?” Jin-hyung said asked me and ended up with his wiping laugh.

“I did though.. I’m just too lazy to think of other names, so please be silent hyung,” my straight answer was given to him and after that, Jin-hyung pinches me on my tummy.

Forget about the game, we have an epic battle of tummy-pinch, -slapping and word-fighting. Like our Great Leader Kim Namjoon had said during his Vlive, no matter where we are and what we do, Jin-hyung and I always end up bickering.

15 minutes later.....................................................

“Aaaah, Kookie-yah, get off my back! Is this how you treat me? I’ve done so many things for you and this is how you treat me! This kid!” Jin-hyung can’t help to scream loudly. We literally had a, sort of a WWE fighting and here I am, the victor of the game, always end up every fight by sitting on Jin-hyung’s back. I’m literally dying of laughter because it is so good to bully Jin-hyung. It’s been a while though.

I lie down on the red velvet carpet of the hotel room, breathe in deeply as I start to feel sleepy and tired. Jin-hyung looks like he just escaped from hell. Despite that, he still rolls his body to approach and lie down next to me.

“Dude, whenever I saw you typed Yoonji’s name just now, I wonder if you suddenly remembered that girl and wanted to start your relationship with her all over again”said Jin-hyung.

“Definitely no..After that incident, I promised myself that I will not involve with any girl again...not yet.. maybe not now..Furthermore, I still cannot overcome this shyness of mine..I still don’t know yet how to react properly to girls. Yoonji? I’m not sure whether she is alive or not.”

“Hyung can teach you.”

“No,thanks. You don’t even have a girlfriend. Who wants you?”

“Oh don’t you make me start our fight again. Yah! You said that you are not used to girl? Pardon? Just now Camila went to hug you and you hugged her back right? Stop playing angel!”

“It’s an American culture so of course I needed to hug her back! What? Should I just push her away?”

“But still there’s no hint of shyness and embarrassment on your face like what you had said just now! I don’t care, you are lying! Oooh, our Kookie had grown up, someone should tie this kid before he’s going wild”

“Do you expect me to pull out ‘Jungshook’ face all the time? What am I? A meme king?”

“Sure you are!”

“Arasso!”

“How to spell Camila Cabello?!”

“C.A.M.I.L.A C.A.B.E.L.L.O!” I replied Jin-hyung with one-breath spelling.

“Good for you!”

“Of course it’s good for me!”I still didn’t want to lose.

Knock!Knock! Someone is knocking the door. Hobi-hyung’s face shows up, with some shade of eye-bags.

“Yah,it’s already late. You guys should go to sleep. We are having hard time to sleep ya know? What’s with all the ‘bam bam bam’ sounds like someone was fighting in here? And Jin-hyung, come back to the room now or I will lock the door,”said Hobi-hyung.

“It’s okay, I just crash in here with this baby,”said Jin-hyung.

“I never say that you can sleep here-“before I could finish my words, Jin-hyung already acted like I didn’t exist and starts hijacking the pillows and some parts of my bed.

“Okay, but stop playing.. we need to sleep,” Hobi-hyung left my room with a soft warning.

I should sleep too. I don’t want to wake up with puffy face. Since we had won the Top Social Artist at Billboard Award, I believe that they will be a lot of interviews tomorrow. Need to pull my sweetest smile again. If not for the press, paparazzi and fans will always follow us and take our pictures. Let’s serve them the best visual of Golden Maknae.

I push Jin-hyung a little bit as he uses a lot of my space. However I still can’t close my eyes. A lot of things are playing inside my mind. My mind is reminiscing from the start of our debut until now, where we were standing on the billboard stage just now and almost known worldwide. How time had flew. I miss the old days sometimes. A lot of dramas had happened at our old dorm. Our dogs, the staffs who were no longer here with us, not so muscular body of mine, small kitchen, small bedrooms, the not-so-big dancing room and...

My secret, which only the hyungs and I knew and had promised to not talk about it anymore.

 

“Jungkook-ah..wake up..you have school today,” Tae-hyung’s soft voice broke my cochlea for the third time. I still refuse to wake up. I want to sleep more. What’s school? I don’t want to leave my bed. Not now.

“Kookie, faster. You only have half an hour,” now Jimin-hyung shakes my body quite hardly. I twist my body once and continue to sleep. Despite the closed eyes, I can hear them sighing due to my stubbornness.

Suddenly, I feel something is playing with my . My eyes opened widely, ready to curse the owner of the hands.

“Oops, a corpse just woke up!” there, Jin-hyung with his pink apron. I cancelled my pure intention to curse him because he is Jin-hyung. I don’t want to listen to his nagging about my faulty mouth later.

“Hyung, stop hurting my pride. My s are precious, okay?” I continue muttering with my eyes still closed tightly. However, Jin-hyung’s holy tactic always works as I no longer lying on my bed.

“Faster. Take your bath and have some breakfast. I’ll drive you to school later. Don’t be late!” Jin-hyung urged me. I have no choice than to do what he asked me to do. Brushing teeth, taking bath, packing my things to school and getting ready for breakfast.

Only some toasts with low-fat milk, but I’m glad that Jin-hyung always remembers to make me some food early in this morning. But I really wish that he could just prepare this simple breakfast without his soft-pink apron. I feel like he exaggerates a little whenever he puts on that. It’s. Only. Toasts. With. Milk. For. God’s. Sake. It’s not that he is cooking something very festive.

“Be grateful, young boy. At least you don’t go to school with empty stomach,” Jin-hyung seemed to read my mind successfully.

I eat slowly as a sign that I’m not so eager for school.

“Now come on, why do you look so despair? Hate school that much? I thought that you have girlfriend-“ at that moment, I spurt out my milk without warning. The milk went so far and some of it reached Jin-hyung’s apron. Jin-hyung stares at his apron sorrowfully.

“My goodness, JK. You just ruined my holy apron,” Jin-hyung takes off his apron which is already stained with milk and some of my saliva and washes it at the sink. I try to finish my breakfast as soon as possible before he can ask any question.

“So, it’s true that you have one? You have a GF Kookie? I nonchalantly said it just now but it seems like you really have one? You looked surprised,”Jin-hyung asked me while washing his apron. At that pretty moment, the great eavesdroppers, Jimin-hyung and Tae-hyung show up in the kitchen. Ah, they must be hiding behind the door’s curtain all these while and had heard everything, these 95-liners.

“Who is she? Do we know her?” Jimin-hyung as the first busy body asked me.

“Had she ever come here?” the second busy body Kim Taehyung asked me. But his question was not relevant at all.

“Did I ever bring my girl-friends here at Bighit Building?” I asked them sarcastically.

“OOOOOOHHHH, so our Kookie has a GF. Wow!” the 95-liners almost said the words simultaneously. Good job, now they already knew. My answer just confirmed everything. I have a major problem now. I really don’t want them to know because they will make jokes about this for the rest of the days. I will suffer. Help.

“Kookie never showed me any sign of love but suddenly he has a girlfriend? I’m such a loser,” Jimin-hyung said with a pouty mouth.

“I like you hyung but you always want to kiss me, I’m terrified,” I said the truth. Tae-hyung cracks up hardly. Jin-hyung also giggles to my honesty while Jimin-hyung continues with his pouty mouth.

“Let’s go hyung. I’m going to be late,” I say to Jin-hyung while washing my dishes.

“Well, you are LATE..”Jin-hyung said to me. I look at my watch. Snap! I’m already 5 minutes late! The prefect must be waiting for me already at the gate. What is this day? The day for hapless?

Regardless what it is, I still need to attend school. Therefore, I hurried myself and say goodbye to all of my hyungs, including Hobi-hyung, Namjoon-hyung and Yoongi-hyung who just appeared from nowhere.

 

Standing in front of the gate, I can see the eyes of the two prefects on me. Looks like they are judging me badly. Well, I have quite a bad reputation since I always late for school. Despite the nasty looks, I go to fill in my name in the late attendance book with the reason of ‘traffic jams’ next to my name.

“Traffic jam happens every day, right, Jungkook?” one of them with the spectacle asked me. I know that he was being sarcastic just to ruin my mood. Luckily it failed as I really don’t want to give a damn about it.

“What to do? It always be like that,”I said.

“Then, you should get out of your house earlier to avoid it,” the other prefect tried to give me an advice. I don’t reply anything to her. Being late to school is already bad and if I got criticized by the teacher in the classroom later, it will be worse. Therefore, I leave them quickly.

Half walking half running, I make it to the class. But the teacher has not arrived yet.

“Ah, hey Jungkook-ah! You are lucky that all of the teachers have a meeting until 10 this morning,” one of my friends informs me.

Oh, really? I guess I can continue my sleep then.

“Kookie, come join us! Let’s have an arm wrestling!” the other friend of mine, quite muscular, always demands to arm wrestle with me. I don’t get it why he really loves the game although he always loses.

“No, not today,”

“Not today? Tsk, you always reject my request..’Not today, not today’,” he mimicked me.

“Pffft, I got a feeling that when he debuts later, Not Today will be the title of his song and he will be the main dancer and singer,” my deskmate said to me. Maybe I can trust his quick prophecy. It is not weird that my friends know about me being a trainee. I told them, almost all of them, that I joined a small company named BigHit. It cannot be avoided though, so rather than keeping it as a secret, it is better to just let them know. They sometimes asked me when will I debut and my answer always be ‘sooner’.

Supposedly, students should study when their teachers are not in class. However, to make use of our youth properly, we decide to play a lot of things. Chances rarely come where we can play Jenga, drawing on the whiteboard or chatting about nonsense in class. For a hot minute, everything seems fine until a familiar face appears on the front door.

“Kookie-yah. Let’s have breakfast together,” without any warning, she commands me.

Yoonji.

“Aigoo, nuna! We are playing right now. You can have your breakfast later during recess!” my friends insisted of not letting me go.

“Omo,I’m not going to wait. I’m dying of hunger. Kookie, let’s go,” like a militant, she did not give a chance to any one of us. Of course not, she already makes her ‘you better listen to me’ face, so I guess, I have no choice.

“This is what will happen when you date a girl older than you. It feels like you have a second mother to control everything you do,” one of my friends said that.

“I heard you, okay? Want me to scratch your face? Who’s old?” Yoonji fired him.

“I didn’t say that you are old..I said that you are older,” seems like these two don’t know how to retreat. Before the next world war happens, I should end this now.

“Okay, let’s go.” I say.

Yoonji and I walk to the cafe together. She leads the walk while I am behind her.

Awkward. Silent. These two words are best to describe our situation.

It’s not that she is being awkward. I am. I don’t know how to react to girls properly. I think I’ve already been like this since I crawled out of my mother’s womb.

Some may wonder, if I am this bad with girls, how can Yoonji be my girlfriend? Well, here is the short story of how I met her.

Once upon a time, at my school library, I was searching for the new chemistry reference book. I was so eager to find that book as I deadly need it for my revision. The monthly test was just around the corner. My luck on that day, I managed to find it and just before I went to see the librarian, I saw a petite girl, black-haired with a bob style, was stretching her arms to reach the book on the top of the rack. Ah, she was trying to reach the novel, I guessed. Well, girls always love to read novels. She didn’t realize that there was a stool behind her, where the librarian had put it there for those who are short enough to get the books on the rack. My eyes hurt very much looking at how comical and stupid she was, so I went to help her. Since I am tall, I just grabbed the novel easily and handed it to her. Indeed, the novel was so obese that my hand hurts just by holding it. I wonder how did the girls have time to finish reading everything inside the novel?

“Oooh, thank you,”she said to me.

That was not everything. The second time when I went to the library to return back the reference book, I saw her again, doing the same thing, trying to reach another obese novel on the top of the rack.

I should tell the librarian to put all the novels on lower rack. It’s not that I’m being kind. It’s because a girl like her exists where she didn’t realize that THERE WERE STOOLS PROVIDED to be used.

I face-palmed myself before went to help her for the second time. Only, this time, all of the troubles started. Right after I handed her the book, her eyes was glued on me like I was her food. She stared at me for such a long time and me too, staring at her because as usual I didn’t know how to react properly. So long when suddenly she spoke to me.

”I’ m Yoonji, I think I like you.”

 

It had been two weeks but Yoonji seemed not to give up. I was so stressed by her acts, following me around (more like stalking me), trying to start an unnecessary conversation with me and to the extent, she also bought me snacks during my PE class.

“Kookie-yah, nuna really adore you... Let’s give it a try,” she said to me while smiling. Eh? Why did she need to decide everything for me?

“Nuna, I...I...,”I stuttered everytime I want to decline her. God should just make me mute because of my useless mouth. It’s not hard to say NO. But....I’m afraid.

“Is it because you are 2 years younger than me? Well, I don’t mind about age,”she said that with sparkling eyes. For god’s sake, please save me from this situation.

Thanks to my cowardice, I had no choice than to give her a green light.

But....here we are...being awkward. I repeat, it’s just me being awkward and quiet as f***, while Yoonji tried her best to make our relationship better.

For 2 months, Yoonji could not take it anymore..She started to become very strict with me, meaning that saying no to her results in my death penalty. She controlled me everytime. I barely could have lunch with my friends as usual because she always forced me to do otherwise. If I dared to talk to other girls who also had their eyes on me, she will start to whine. I did feel embarrassed, but I have no courage to fight her back.

That was my biggest problem. Why am I being such a coward? Why did this barbarian girl want to be my girlfriend?

I talked to my bestfriend about this, and he said,”it’s because your ‘big sister’ love you like hell, so I think you should just keep on going.”

Right after he said that, I gave him an uppercut for not helping me properly.

I really wish to end this so-called couple relationship. I want to live my life properly. Furthermore, I don’t like being controlled. It hurts my pride. If it is truly the things that they call ‘love’, I can say that this is not the love that I want.

 

Lately, Yoonji seemed not to control me very much, well except during breakfast and lunch. No more whining, no more babbling and no more strange gazes for me when I went to talk to other girls. What’s wrong? God had listened to my prayer?

“Kookie-yah, here, open your mouth,”oh well, I was wrong. She doesn’t change. Look at her, trying to feed me PUBLICLY.

Before he turns into ‘black Yoonji’, I open my mouth just to let her shove her food in. My....face....is....freaking....red.

“Haha, you are cute...Nuna can’t help to smile looking at you,”she says to me.

I smiled a little bit just to avoid any drama being started afterwards. She giggles at me. Well, sometimes, seeing her being kind like this makes me feel relieved. It means I am safe for a while.

Everywhere we go, Yoonji always leads me. Sometimes, when we are climbing the stairs, she will hold my hand.

“Why do you hold my hand?”I ask her.

“I’m afraid that you will fall,”she replies.

Pffft, am I her brother?

The only things that I like about her is that she will always teach me about the subjects that I found very hard to score. After every test, she will not forget to ask about my results.

“Aigoo, Kookie-yah..You can do better than this,”she says. I feel like she’s being cocky. But, to make use of her benefits, I just let her say anything that she wants so that later she will teach me. Luckily she is one of the best students in her batch.

 

“Kookie-yah, let’s hang out after class,”Yoonji orders me.

“Sorry, nuna but I can’t. My hyung had promised to fetch me later.”

Yoonji looks at me for a while before“Ok.”

..............Did I just mishear her? What? She says ok? For real?

“Kookie-yah, I just want you to know that I love you very much........I....Never mind,”

Ok? What’s with this sudden confession?

“Why did you suddenly say that?” I asked her while giggling a bit.

“Nothing....just want you to know.”

We sit in silent for some minutes until the bell rings, indicating that our lunch hour was over and students need to get ready for the evening sessions.

“Let’s go nuna,” I stand up and urged her. She is still sitting on the balcony stairs.

“Nuna?” I call her.

“Ok, let’s go,” she suddenly stands up and takes my hand. Again, she is the one leading me. However, I spotted something. Is she crying?

“Nuna? Are you ok?”I asked her. She doesn’t reply me. So we just walk down the balcony without any word. When we almost reach my class, she quickly releases my hand.

“See you later,” she said while not looking at me and left me in confusion.

 

The next day, Jin-hyung told me that he cannot fetch me after class as he has a meeting at his college that evening.

For the first time, I suddenly want to meet Yoonji, just to check out whether she is alright after what had happened yesterday. Whatever it is, I cannot just ignore her as I am his ‘boyfriend’.

I try to find her at her class, which just a block away from my building. She is there, reading the novel that I had helped her to take from the rack last few months.

“Nuna, you are still reading that obese novel? Thought that you had finished it?” I start the conversation. She seems startled.

“Oh my god, Jungkook-ah..I almost got a cardiac arrest when you suddenly called me,” Yoonji nuna said to me.

“I reread it again. This story is good. It’s about a man who longs for a real love but end up in a tragedy,”she said. Hmm, why does the story sounds very like me?

“Why are you still here? Jin-hyung doesn’t come yet?”she asked me.

“He has a meeting, so I need to go home alone,” I said. She looks at me without blinking, so I guess ....

“Emm, nuna....Want to go home together?”I tried to entertain her with my request. But, she is still staring at me. Judging me now?

“It’s okay if you don’t want to.” I said to her while waving, getting ready to go home.

Before I can say my goodbye to her, she stops me,” wait, I’ll go home with you. It’s already late I’m afraid that something will happen,”

“Oh yeah? To whom?”I asked with a joking face.

“To you,” she said. Awwh, why is suddenly she acts all good to me?

“Nuna, I’m not a kid,” I said to her.

“You are.”

I burst in laughter. My goodness, it seems like Yoonji-nuna also saw me as a kid. I thought that only my hyungs treat me like that.

As I am laughing, Yoonji stares at me. I notice that so I shut my mouth quickly.

“Sorry nuna.”

She doesn’t say anything. While being silent, she starts to pack her things inside her bag.

“Let’s go,”she says while taking my hand.

Hmm? No scolding for me this day? I just made fun of her just now. What’s gotten into her? Lots of questions play in my mind during our journey. Even though she is holding my hand and leads me to the gate, she doesn’t even look back at me.

 

We are not talking too much. I wonder if she has problems that make her quite unusual. I take part to lighten up the mood but she just responds nonchalantly.

“Jungkook-ah, you said that one day you’ll be a singer but I never listen to you singing,” she suddenly said that.

“Well, I’m a bit embarrassed. I still need to practice a lot. You know nuna, when I first assigned to BigHit, they have problems to make me singing. It took around 30 minutes before I could start to do so. The worst was I always ended up crying” I told her.

She smiles at my confession.

“You are really a crybaby. You see, this is why you are really precious to everyone,” she said.

I don’t respond to her. Only pout a little bit as a sign of dissatisfaction.

“Don’t do that,” she said to me. I never know that she finally looks at me.

“Okay,” I said to her but still not stop pouting.

Yoonji nuna giggles at me. For the first time, I enjoy seeing her being this way.

“What’s wrong with you yesterday?”I take this chance to ask her.

“What’s with yesterday? Nothing happened,” obviously, she avoided my question.

“Well, I noticed that-“ before I could finish my words, Yoonji suddenly stops me.

“What’s wrong with that old man over there?” Yoonji points her finger at the old man across the road. He seems to had lost something. He is wearing a straw hat with his clothes mostly covered by dirt. He is holding his shoes and being barefoot. A beggar?

Yoonji goes directly to the old man and I quickly follow her. I think, right now, she is the one that neglects her safety. Who knows that the old man is actually a molester and just use this tactic to attract people like her.

“Excuse me ahjusshi, do you need help?” Yoonji shows her hospitality.

“Ah, young girl, please help me. I lost my cards somewhere. I cannot find it,” he said.

“What cards?” I took turn to ask him.

“Cards,”he said again. Tsk, I am sure that he is just a crazy old man. I urge Yoonji to just leave him.

“Nuna, it’s already late. Are you sure you are going to help him? We don’t even know what cards that he said. It’s just a waste of time,” I said to her.

“But, Jungkook-ah, what if that card is a debit card or something? What if he really needs it? What if his life solely depends on it?” Yoonji said. Oh gosh, she is exaggerating like hell.

“5 minutes, if we haven’t found it yet, I’ll leave you here,” I give her a soft warning. I don’t know where did I gain this courage to say it straightly on her face. Yoonji indeed seems to be offended but I don’t care anymore. For all this while, I’m the one that listened to her so it’s time for me to get my pride back. Plus, I have a lot of things to be settled by tonight. Homework, group assignment, dance practice, laundry to be done-

“Okay, just leave me,” Yoonji said coldly. I notice that her voice cracked a little. Are girls always like this? Whenever guys disagree with them, they like to throw a tantrum.

Still, there’s no way I’m leaving her like this. Not with a weird stranger. If anything happens to her, I don’t want to be blamed.

I start to look around. As soon as we found it, I’m going back. It took around 10 minutes until I suddenly notice something stuck at the old man’s rear pocket.

A card. I take it and look at it carefully. A joker card.

“Excuse me, ahjusshi, is this the one that you are looking for?” I show the card to him.

The old man seems to be shocked. He then takes the card from my hand and look at me.

“Young man, you’ve found it,” he said.

What? That card which he ‘solely depends on it for his life’ is just, a joker card? Which he can buy it again at any store? For real? I seriously just waste my whole precious 10 minutes for...that freaking card?!

I am boiling right now. He just made fun of both of us. However, I’m not the one who likes to scold people right on their face( like Yoonji) so I just quickly take my bag and ready to go home.

Yoonji also seems to be disappointed but it’s weird because she said nothing to the old man.

“Wait, before you leave, listen to what I’m going to say,” the old man stopped me from leaving.

“What else to be said? You just made fun of us and we are angry. You are lucky that we still respect you, ahjusshi,”I said to him, almost unable to control my voice.

“For 10 days, you will lose your ability to speak and to move. You will be a great burden to your family,” he said.

“Just what kind of prophecy are you giving me? You are already old ahjusshi, you should ADVISE us not to put a prank on us,” I emphasised the word ‘advise’ to him.

“I’m advising you, so that you are ready,” he replied me.

I can’t take it anymore. He is crazy. Forget about Yoonji, I’m leaving for real. It’s hard for me to get angry but whenever I already got angry, I tend to be scary as f***. Before I hurt anyone, I really should leave quickly.

“Jungkook-ah, wait. Let’s go together,”Yoonji seemed to just woke up from her daydream all this while and starts following me.

“Nuna, I believe that you can take care of yourself. You said it just now that you just accompanying me home because it’s dangerous only for me. So, I think we just separate here. Don’t worry about me, I can take care of myself. Furthermore our house are not on the same way,” I said to her.

“But-“

“Oh god, what else?!”I shouted to her. She startled at my screaming but then still be able to reply me.

“Can you not get angry? What’s wrong with you suddenly? This is really not you,” she said.

“No, this is me for all this while. You know nuna, I’m tired of being controlled by you. You stood on my way everytime! I don’t know what’s youth anymore because you literally had took some part of it from me! I don’t even have times to hang out with my friends lately, all because of you! You treat me like I’m only yours, which I really HATE it! You don’t try to understand me nuna. I try to treat you nicely today because I thought that you had a bad day yesterday. But now, looks like you are fine. So, I leave you here,”

There is a long silent after I spitted out my words to her.

“So you really think that I’m controlling you? Why don’t you just say it to me? It’s already half a year but you NEVER said anything to me, about how you feel. You just agreed with me so I thought that you are really fine....Why didn’t you tell me?!” she asked me. It’s hard to admit, but she was right. Why I didn’t tell her anything?

Hah! Simple! Only one word can describe me.

“Because I’m a coward,” I said to her. She looks at me with teary eyes. Maybe it’s because she’s too surprised when I suddenly rage.

“Well, you are indeed a coward, young boy,” said that old man. I look at him angrily. Thanks to him, I had this fight with Yoonji.

“I still haven’t finish talking and you guys are already fighting. Jungkook, you will have a hard time for the next 10 days, simply, you also give a great burden to all of your family. Also, 10 days later, you will not see this girl again,” the old man finished his words while pointing at Yoonji.

“What makes you so sure, ahjusshi?”

“This card that you pulled out said everything. It shows bad luck to you. It is a sign for you to reflect anything that you had done to people all around you. Your INSINCERITY is worse. You think you are the victim but actually you made yourself a victim,”he said.

“You better apologize to this girl before it’s too late,” he added.

I think it’s time for me to fire him back.

“Firstly, what you have said was irrelevant to me. What are you? A prophet? A fortune-teller? You asked me to reflect about what I’ve done to people around me? Okay, what about you? You put a prank on us and told us nonsense!”I shouted at him.

“One more thing, if I don’t ever see her again-“I said while pointing at Yoonji.

“-then I guess it’s good for me,” there you go. That was my final blow before I leave the place. I walk quickly, not giving a to things around me. It’s already dark when I reached home.

I finished all my jobs past midnight, around 3 a.m. What a tiring and a long day I’ve encountered.

Before sleeping, I think again about the dramatic incident. I still can’t believe that I said all those words just now.

I can’t believe that this little boy, who claimed himself as a coward, suddenly have guts to say all of those things, which I know that it hurts people who just listen to it.

 

2 hours until dawn, I suddenly feel so hot and itchy. The hotness is unbearable anymore so I just wake up quietly, not to wake the other members who are still sleeping and exit the bedroom. Outside the room, I scratch my entire face and body. The hotness is still there so I take off my shirt and bang quickly into the bathroom. This time, I take off everything on my body, pulling the pipe and shower myself.

Argh, what is wrong me? I squat on the floor, gaining strength as I suddenly feel so dizzy and nauseous. I crawl to the toilet bowl and waiting for myself to vomit but nothing goes out. The water splashing on my body doesn’t make me feel any better. I cannot take it anymore, I need to find some ice. This hotness feels like you are standing at the edge of the hell. I stand up from crawling, barely made it and get out of the bathroom. Water drips down from my body, making the entire floor wet. I forgot to turn off the shower, and also forgot that I am actually . I don’t care anymore. I’M TOTALLY DYING OF HOTNESS.

Before I can make it to the freezer, my feet suddenly become very numb and I stumble pathetically at the living room. I want to scream for help but my mouth gives no sound anymore. At that moment, I remember that my mom told me that whenever a person suddenly become paralysed and cannot speak, it means that the death is near.

So, is this how I will end my life? Without a strand of cloth, feeling hot and nauseous at the same time? Am I going to hell?

I cannot think of anything anymore. Whatever happens to me afterwards, I don’t want to give a damn about it. Let this pain go forever. I will not debut with my friends but I know that they can go on without me. My mom, my dad and Junghyun will mourn at my death so I pray that they will become stronger soon. I hope that my brother can take care of our parents properly. My friends, my fellow classmates, goodbye. Hope to see you guys at other times.

Suddenly, I remember about Yoonji.

Yoonji nuna.

I’m so sorry for behaving like that to you. I am rude. I know that you were upset.

Please someone sends my regard to her. Tell her to forgive me so that I can rest in peace.

Yoonji nuna, it’s not that I hate you very much. It’s because I don’t see you as my girlfriend.

For all this while, you nagged at me, scolded me, and sometimes screamed at me. However, I admit that there are some parts of you that I adore. You taught me very well, helped me when I have troubles, leading me every time we walked together, pampered me by feeding me your favourite food.

You are more than that Yoonji nuna. I love you..but only as a sister.

It’s good if you know about this feeling of mine.

 

Darkness surrounds me everywhere. I am very sure that this is only a part of transition from world to somewhere else, my grave indeed.

Click!

Hmm? What was that clicking sound?

“Uarrrghhh! Aigoo, why do humans need to wake up early in the morning?” I heard Jimin-hyung, yawning while also grumbling.

Where is he? I cannot see him.

Wait, I am....alive?

My eyes are being pierced by the source of light from the lamp above me. Indeed the clicking sound just now was from Jimin-hyung turning on the lamp.

Wah! I’m alive! I’m safe! Thank god for giving me a second chance to breathe. I thought that I’m already dead and will later wake up inside my coffin.

So, what were the symptoms last night?

Whatever, I need to see the doctor later. But right now I need to slip away carefully without Jimin-hyung noticing me. I am for god’s sake, without any clothes or pants! ( I just remembered about it). I don’t want Jimin-hyung to have nightmare early in this morning.

Come on now, I need to turn my body a little bit before crawling. I’m so lucky that I passed out next to the coffee table, so Jimin-hyung might not be able to notice me very easily.

However....

I....cannot move.. my feet are not numb anymore but...I cannot move? What’s wrong?

I try to reach the table’s leg beside me with my hand.

Hold on...

What is wrong with my arms?! Why are they so small and chubby? I raise my legs a bit just to see them. Same! They are also small and chubby! What had happened?!

“Hello, is anyone there?” Jimin-hyung’s voice hits my cochlea.

NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO! Don’t come here!

“AAAGAGAGAGAAAAAGAGAAAA!”

...............Pardon? What did I just say? I actually want to prevent him from approaching me but why was that word came out from my mouth?

“Agagaga, aaa,”I tried again. No kidding, I can’t even speak properly?! I notice that my voice is no longer hoarse and sounds like a mumbling little baby.

“Omo, you surprised me,” now I can see Jimin-hyung clearly. I’m totally exposed! It’s too late... he saw my thing already. I really hope that either me or Jimin-hyung was dead right now.

“Aigoo, cutie why are you here? Who left you honey? Why are you ? Where’s your parent?” Jimin-hyung lifts me up while asking me.

Since when did this guy gain so much strength to lift me easily? Did I lose weight?

He put my head on his shoulder and starts patting my back softly.

Why, am I feeling so small? What had happened to me?

“Jin-hyung! Look at this baby! I found him and alone at our living room!” Jimin-hyung shouted loudly for Jin-hyung who is upstairs.

Baby? Who ? Me?

“What? A baby? Why does suddenly there’s a baby inside our building?” Jin-hyung walks down the stairs while asking Jimin-hyung.

“I don’t know,” Jimin-hyung answered Jin-hyung . Of course he doesn’t know anything.

“Holy goodness gracious, find something to warm him up! Hurry, he’s going to catch cold!” Jin-hyung urged Jimin-hyung to do so after seeing that I am exposed.

“Hyung, where on earth can I find clothes for him? Since when did we raise a baby in our dorm?”

“Then find a blanket!”Jin-hyung told Jimin-hyung. He takes me from Jimin-hyung’s arm and put my head close to his chest while Jimin-hyung, with the speed of light climbs the stairs to get me a blanket.

“Omo, honey. Let’s not catch cold, okay? Hang in there, our uncle Jimin is going to find something warm for you,”Jin-hyung said to me.

His words are the answer for all of this chaos inside my head.

Now I fully realised that I had transformed into a baby. So, the symptoms last night were because of this.

The only question inside my head is, WHY?

How should I react as a baby? Normally babies will cry if they are cold but I just fall into silent, which is of course not normal at all.

While Jin-hyung is patting me on my back, I don’t realize that a tear came out from my eye. No whining like a baby, only a silent tear.

 

All Bighit staffs are surprised with the sudden existence of a baby inside our dorm. Bang PD told the members to ask the staffs whether they know me, or happened to see me somewhere. Some of them already made theories, where a couple broke into our dorm to leave me there so that we will be accused of having an illegal child. Of course Bang PD would get angry after hearing those irrational assumptions. However, rather than handing me to the police, he told the members to take care of me for a while as the media will definitely going to be wild with the rumors. Better safe than sorry, he said.

“Where is Jungkook?” Yoongi-hyung is the very first person to notice my mysterious disappearance.

“Yeah, when I woke up just now, he was not beside me,” Hobi-hyung added.

“Maybe he had gone to the gym? He has no classes today right?” Namjoon-hyung asked the other members.

“Yup, but usually on weekends he will get up late,” Jin-hyung, as the eldest who cares very much about our routines gave Namjoon-hyung an answer.

“I’m checking the gym now, he needs to know about all of these chaos ” Hobi-hyung left the others to find me at the gym.

Only if he knows that I didn’t go anywhere. For all this while I am with them, only I cannot speak the truth.

“Aigoo, such a good baby you are..He is so well-mannered right? Look at him, not even crying a litte bit,” Namjoon-hyung said to other members while looking at me.

I will not cry if I don’t want to. Someone please tell him that.

“I want to hold him. Gimme,” Tae-hyung insisted to take me from Namjoon-hyung’s arm. He then kisses me on the cheek and I can’t even stop him.

My sufferings had begin.

“Taaaaa,”I gave him my respond and Tae-hyung just smiles. He doesn’t know that I actually wanted to say ‘get off my face’ to him.

“Aww, so tiutttt,”Jimin-hyung pinches my cheek. I really want to bite his small fingers of him but I have no teeth.

“Now don’t make him suffocated, it’s good that he is not whining now. I really hope that you guys will not make him cry,” Yoongi-hyung warned Jimin and Tae.

I guess, I am safer with Yoongi-hyung, so I stretch my arm towards him.

“Taaa,”I make that cute baby sound to him which means ‘take me away from them’.

Yoongi-hyung seems to be flustered, of course. A baby suddenly wants to be carried by him. As a tsundere, Yoongi-hyung takes me away from Tae-hyung without any smile, but I know that he is excited.

They do a lot of things on me like pinching my chubby cheeks, my hair, playing with my little hands and kissing me on the cheeks which I hate the most. They seem to forget for a while that I am actually a stranger who claimed to be ‘left’ at our dorm.

“Guys, we have problem,” Hobi-hyung comes back after going to the gym.

“I cannot find Jungkook. He is nowhere to be found,” said Hobi-hyung. Well, for me it is logic because I had turned into a baby. But for the other members, they start to get worried.

“Have you tried to find him inside the toilet? Maybe he is having bad stomach this morning,” Jin-hyung suggested the others.

“I’ve went there but there’s no one. The toilet is just clean and there’s no sign of him,”Hobi-hyung added.

“The place where he is usually studying?” Namjoon asked him.

“Negative,” said Hobi-hyung.

“Oh god, where is he now? This morning we found this little baby and now Jungkook had disappeared? What are these going to mean?,” Jin-hyung looked like he’s going to lose control of his emotion anytime.

“Wait! I haven’t finished yet. Just now I went to our room to check again whether he was there, and guess what? I’ve found this letter on his bed next to mine.”

All members, including me are interested at the letter which is being held by Hobi-hyung.

“I’m so shocked to read the content of this letter. It seemed like he already went out last night, while we were all sleeping,” Hobi-hyung said to us.

“Taaataaataaa,” I can’t help to respond. I really want to say something but this cursed mouth of mine is against my will. What letter? I didn’t write anything!

Namjoon hyung took the letter from Hobi-hyung. When he opened the envelope, I spot something at the back of it. A brushed stamp of a man with a wide grin, looking so hideous.

Joker.

Namjoon-hyung sighed heavily after reading the letter.

“Jungkook said that he has problems. Lately, he was so stressed by the routines and in the mean time, he also needs to catch up with his school things. He said that he will be back in 10 days, just to clear up his mind,” Namjoon-hyung said to all of us.

What? Stressed with my routines and school? Okay, maybe a little bit but to the extent of running away from our dorm? In my life, I NEVER choose to run away from my responsibilities! Whoever wrote that letter, I swear that I will beat him half-dead for slandering me!

“He told us not to tell his family and not to involve with police. He begged us to understand his situations or he swears not to come back,” the last words said by Namjoon-hyung.

“Aaaaa....aaaaaaaa,” and whatever I was saying to them are useless. I struggled really hard because I am angry. Despite that, I can’t even do anything.

Yoongi-hyung hushed me as he thinks that I am going to cry. He tightens up his hug. God, I feel like crying. Who dares to do all of these things on us? Who hates us so much and really want to see us down? Who sends this curse on me and makes me paralysed?

“He never said anything to us before...why suddenly he leaves us at this critical time? There are only two months left before our debut, and he chose to do this?” Jimin-hyung suddenly said that. He looks really disappointed. Not just him, all of the members too. The fat tears start to roll down my cheeks as I feel like I am being accused. But the truth cannot be told.

Regardless what had happened, Namjoon-hyung needs to tell Bang PD about this. Bang PD’s reaction is of course, not good. Even though he did not blame Namjoon for my ‘rebel’, I know that he had hard times facing our CEO. He is the leader. We know him well. He must be feeling like he failed to take care of us properly.

Now, the members gather at the living room. It is weird though. Last night, I remember that I left the shower opened and the floor supposedly covered with water this morning as I walked out from the bathroom soaking wet. My clothes that I threw after the sudden hotness had also disappeared. They should be lying in front of the bathroom but as Hobi-hyung had said, the toilet seemed clean like no one had used it this morning. This is really one kind of sorcery.

Yoongi-hyung is still carrying me. He looks upset so I don’t dare to make a sound. Other members also fall into silent. Hobi-hyung seems to space out due to all of these confusions. Jin-hyung, Jimin-hyung and Tae-hyung look very discouraged.

“It’s okay, just let him away for only 10 days. I believe that he will be back,” Namjoon-hyung finally speaks.

“But, promise me that when he comes back, don’t get angry at him. He is just a teenager, not yet an adult. It’s normal for him to get into this rebellious phase,” he gave the members the advice which will sooner be useful for me from being scold.

But, will I really come back to them as Jungkook? Or, will I stuck in this small body?

“Guys, will you promise me? I don’t want any of you to be upset at my request,” Namjoon-hyung demands an answer.

“Okay, but only for 10 days. If he is not coming back, at least tell his family. They deserve to know,” Yoongi-hyung said to Namjoon-hyung.

The other members also agree with Yoongi-hyung. I can’t believe that instead of complaining, they worry more about me.

“Yeah, Yoongi-hyung is right. I’m upset, of course, but I remember that I used to be like him last few years. I wish that he is just fine out there. Where ever he is staying, I hope that he is healthy and eating well,” Jimin-hyung added.

Now, all of the members agree to wait for me for another 10 days. No more sullen faces, only hope filled in their eyes. They care so much about me. I’m glad that I am able to see this by my own eyes.

“About the little kid-” Jin-hyung suddenly spoke.

“What are we going to do with him?” Jin-hyung asked them.

“We can’t hand him to the police either since Bang PD is against it,” said Namjoon-hyung.

“Until when?” Hobi-hyung asked Namjoon-hyung.

“Until he says ‘ok’,”he added.

“Oh....hmm... fine then. So we need to look after him?”

“Seems like it,”

They have a serious discussion afterwards. For the upcoming days, they will take turn to look after me. However, they cannot bring me outside to avoid controversies and the wild eyes from looking at us. They also came into an idea where they want to give me to the staffs who already had experiences in handling kid. Since most of us have zero experience in taking care of babies, Namjoon-hyung thinks that it is quite unsafe for me to stay with them.

“Nevermind, I want to look after this kid. Our JK is not around so I need someone else to lighten up my mood everyday,” Jin-hyung insisted of not letting me go.

“You don’t mind listening to him crying or washing his poops later? Are you serious?” Namjoon-hyung asked Jin-hyung.

“I’m fine with it, I think. Sooner or later we will be a father, so this is the best chance to practice,” Jin-hyung said to them.

I could hear that Namjoon-hyung mumbled ‘wow, so early’ to Jin-hyung.

“And, I don’t believe that this secret is safe with our staff. They have a lot of things to be settled so they might feel uncomfortable taking care of this kid. Since JK is away, our activities had come into a hiatus, except for Namjoon, Yoongi, and Hoseok as they need to settle the lyrics,line distributions and the choreography. Of course I will help you guys if you need me, so don’t worry.” Jin-hyung added.

Tae-hyung and Jimin-hyung nod as a sign that they agree with him.

“I will take my part to look after this kid as well,” Yoongi-hyung told Namjoon-hyung. Namjoon-hyung has no other choices left.

“Me too,” Hobi-hyung joined to this agreement.

“Alright then, since everyone had no objection, we will take care of this little boy together. I’m glad that all of you are being so kind. Well kid, welcome to bangtan family,” Namjoon-hyung said while looking at me.

My heart...there is something crawling inside me....It is so warm...

For a moment, I forgot that I’m actually stuck in this deep trouble. Everyone loves me.

 

I am still thinking about the joker stamp behind the envelope. Was that old man a sorcerer? He hates me very much for what I’ve done so he sent this curse on me? But what actually did I do to him? He was the one who gave us trouble, and also the only cause for my broken relationship with Yoonji.

Not that I care much about it, only I don’t like it when the situation seemed to be like I am the one at fault.

The members had asked the trustworthy staffs to buy my necessities yesterday. More like smuggling the things into Bighit building. They needed to do so to avoid suspicion from our neighbours. Of course, why suddenly six young boys bought all of these things when all of us are still single, with no wives or girlfriends?

Today, as the eldest, Jin-hyung volunteers to take care of me. There is no cradle or crib since they are very expensive so he needs to carry me around or puts me on a mattress.

“It’s weird that you still haven’t poop or pee from yesterday. Aigoo, you got a strong bladder, right, little boy?” he said to me.

There’s no way I’m going to poop. It feels weird when I imagine that they change my diapers and wash my . No, it is a real definition of nightmare.

“I’m going to prepare you some food. So, stay here for a while, okay?” he said again and leaves me. I took this opportunity to twist my body. I strengthen my arms and legs so that I can be in crawling position.

Ah hey! I can crawl.

I tried my best to crawl around the living room. I’m an expert, I admit it since I can crawl like a freaking cockroach. Very fast until suddenly-

“Wah, you can crawl? Look at you, so cute with your chubby little hands. Come here,” wild Tae suddenly appears out of nowhere. He gestures me to crawl to him.

Heh, like I’m going to.

I crawl away from him. He seems very surprised and starts to chase me. I look back and am shocked to see him behind me. He is very big while I am very small, it feels like a monster is going to get me and eats me alive. I suddenly feel very scared looking at how big he is, chasing me very fast so I start to scream.

“Honey, come here,” Tae-hyung added. Oh god, when he said that I can’t help to feel that he is a ert (I’m sorry Tae). My fear grows bigger so I start to slip under the table and stay there.

Somebody please save me from wild Tae!

Tae-hyung crouches and looks at me under the table with his meme face. He stretches his hand to reach me but I have nowhere to go. I start to shriek a little bit since I am so terrified.

“Got you!” Tae-hyung’s hands finally reach me and he pulls me out. He lifts me up and throws me in the air then starts to kiss me non-stop.

I scream loudly because it cringes me like hell. Even though my body is a baby but my soul is still the teenage Jungkook. This guy is kissing me and I really want to throw up!

Think Jungkook, think! What will a normal baby does when he is suffocated?

They cry.

In order to stay alive, I pull out the saddest face ever and make a sobbing baby sound. Tae-hyung is startled. I did it! It works.

“Omo, jagiya, please don’t cry. Uncle Tae will not scare you again,” he said to me and kisses me on the cheek again.

I wish that I can bite this guy, for my own sake.

“Taehyung-ah, did you make him cry?” Jin-hyung appeared from the kitchen with a bottle of milk.

Damn, with this body, I cannot enjoy my favourite dishes anymore. Milk is going to be my meal now. I freaking hate it! Like it or not, my stomach demands to be filled so I have no choice left.

“He almost cried but I managed to stop him. I’m the real daddy here,”Tae-hyung said and I can’t help to notice how cocky he was.

“Yeah, good for you. Give me that boy. It’s time for meal,” Jin-hyung said with a cute voice before feeding me.

But.......

Splurrrr! I can’t help it anymore. The milk is very diluted. It tasted like plain water!

“Hyung, how many spoon of milk did you put in?” Tae-hyung asked Jin-hyung while wiping my mouth with a tissue.

“Only one,” Jin-hyung answered him.

“Aish, don’t be too stingy, hyung. Next time make it three. It’s too diluted,” Tae-hyung said again and leaves with my bottle to the kitchen. He might go there to add more milk powder.

“Like I know that you are a picky eater....A picky eater,” Jin-hyung said while teasing me. He puts his forehead on mine then kisses my tummy.

Lol, you were the one who said that you want to practice taking care of babies to Namjoon-hyung, yet he had already failed this simple task.

 

Jimin-hyung takes turn to watch me at night. My nightmare starts again. He, just like Tae-hyung, always wants to kiss me. I am so tired to resist it, so I just let him does whatever he wants.

I wonder what makes them like to kiss me very much. Am I that cute? I still haven’t see my face after the transformation.

“Stay here baby. Uncle Jimin is going to get the blanket for both of us. It’s almost 10, so you need to sleep now,” Jimin-hyung left me and goes to his room. I notice that he left his phone on the coffee table (my place now is always in the living room since our bedrooms are already cramped). I want to see my face so badly so I crawl towards it and try to get it.

Pap! Omo, it falls and hits the floor! Oh god, I hope that Jimin-hyung’s phone is not cracked. Please don’t! I don’t want to be scold!

I touch the screen to check it. Phew! Nothing happen. It works like usual. Without wasting time, I touch the camera button and quickly change it to the front camera.

“Ayee, honey. You cannot play with this. It’s mine,” Jimin-hyung suddenly takes the phone away from me.

“Agagagaaaaagagagaaaa!” I scold him with my own language. I just want to see my own face!

“What? Do you want to play with this? No, it’s not good for your development. Kids nowadays love to play with gadgets and tend to be stubborn when they had grown up,” Jimin-hyung said to me.

I make my sobbing face again. It’s hard to shed tears quickly from my eyes so I just put my face on the floor. Only certain babies do this when they are unsatisfied with something. I hope it works to lure Jimin-hyung.

“Okay, okay... don’t cry honey. I didn’t mean to scold you. Please don’t put your face on the floor, you might get rashes,” Jimin-hyung said while lifting me up. He snuggles me tightly and whenever I lift up my face, a tear had successfully rolled down my cheeks, making me look more pitiful. Jimin-hyung seems to admit his defeat.

“Alright, only for this once. Next time, I’m going to hide this from you. So, what were you looking just now, camera? Okay, I turn it on for you,” Jimin-hyung touched the camera button and now I can see my face clearly.

“You look like one of our fellow members a lot, kid. His name is Jungkook.. I wish that he is here, playing with you together with me. I miss him,” Jimin-hyung said sincerely.

I have no words to describe my emotion right now. He is right. I look like my own self when I was a baby. Only, my cheeks are much chubbier.

Do they even come across their mind that I am actually their Jungkook?

Who will? How can a teenager suddenly turns into a baby? That is really some acts of magic. No one will ever come across that thought.

“The other guys also miss him very much. Hobi-hyung and Namjoon-hyung asked if Jungkook ever called me or Uncle Tae today. Well, he didn’t.”

I have no response to give him. My heart is flooded. Poor them, worrying about me very much.

“It’s okay though. Only 8 days left and he already promised to come back. However, I wish that he is being well out there, and whoever meets him will treat him nicely. How can we are not worried about him? He is just a teenage, and he is out there alone by himself,” Jimin-hyung added.

“He is not fully understands about the meaning of responsibilities, so we just let him away with this. But, we are also amazed, you know, because at his young age he already took risk to join this field, where our future is not yet confirmed. Being a trainee is already hard, yet, he uses all of his might to do well in everything. School, sports, dancing, singing, you name it. He’s our Golden Maknae for reasons.”

“I miss seeing him being cold towards me. I miss how he pulled me away whenever I tried to sneakily hug or kiss him. Well I purposely did all of that because he’s so cute when he got angry. We can’t help to spoil that brat very much,”

“Aaaaaa,” I want to say something to him. I want to say that I miss my old body too. I miss to play around with them.

I miss you guys, even though I’m not going anywhere but I miss them very much. I miss our normal interactions.

To Jimin-hyung, I admit that I have been so rough towards him. However, he seemed not to put in heart about all of my actions. Maybe he did sometimes but not for such a long time as he already thinks me as his own brother who just like to be spoiled.

My round eyes settled on him. He just smiles looking at me before pulling me closer to kiss my forehead.

I guess I just let him slide tonight. It’s okay since I am a baby.

“You rarely cry, little one. I’m so amazed that you are such a good baby. You seem to understand our situation now, so thank you. If our Golden Maknae is away then you can become our Golden Baby,” Jimin-hyung added before lay me down on the mattress. He put the small pillow under my head before lying down beside me.

“One day, if I am to become a father, I hope that my sons are as good as you,” Jimin-hyung said before closing his eyes. His hand is still patting me slowly on my tummy, just to make me sleep.

5 days had passed and they took care of me very well. I was well-fed and always clean. Even though I’m quite embarrassed when they changed my diapers or bathed me, I just let them did it since I can no longer manage myself.

“I’m taking this kid with me, can I?” Namjoon-hyung asked Jin-hyung . Since Jin-hyung is the eldest, the other members need to ask his permission first to take me out of my safe territory (our dorm). However, I am not allowed to be brought out of Bighit building.

“Who’s with you? It’s okay if you bring him together if someone else is with you,” Jin-hyung said.

“Ouch, you don’t believe me, hyung?” Namjoon-hyung seemed to be hurt a little by Jin-hyung’s words.

“It’s not like that. I’m quite worried since you want to take him out of this dorm. Furthermore....you...you like to break things nowadays,” the last sentence by Jin-hyung was hardly to be heard. Well, he tried not to offend Namjoon-hyung I guess.

Nevertheless, Namjoon-hyung just giggles.

“I knew it, hyung. You must be worried about that. Aigoo, we are not even debuting but I already got my nickname as a monster of destruction,” Namjoon-hyung said.

“Well, blame those kids though. They called you that so I can’t help it,” Jin-hyung murmured.

“I’m going with Hobi. He is going to settle the choreography today, so he asked me to accompany him and he wants me to bring this kid together,”

“You seriously want to bring that kid to the studio?! What if or neighbours see him?” Jin-hyung starts to get worried.

“Aaayaaaayaaa,” I did my baby sound, meaning that I agree with Jin-hyung.

“Only for today, hyung. Poor this kid, he’s being caged inside our dorm. It’s not good for him. Besides, I think it’s okay if I only bring him out for a while. Even if they see him, it is not something weird since I just bring him there only for today, right? Like they will care. If they happen to ask me I just tell them that he is our staff’s child,” Namjoon-hyung tried to change Jin-hyung’s mind. Suddenly I change my mind and also think the same as Namjoon-hyung. It is so stressful for me to just crawl around our living room for these five days. I need to see the outside world too. I’m deadly stirred crazy here.

“Okay, but be careful.” Jin-hyung easily gave his permission with a warning tone.

Jin-hyung put my necessities inside a bag before giving it to Namjoon-hyung.

“Remember to feed him on time. If he cries, bring him home quickly,”his last message towards the leader. Namjoon-hyung nods before leaving our dorm. Hobi-hyung is waiting at the main entrance.

“Aaaaa, my little boy! Come to Papaseok,” Hobi-hyung takes me away from Namjoon-hyung’s arm. He is more advanced than the other members. The others only call themselves as ‘uncle’ while Hobi-hyung uses ‘papa’ when addressing himself to me.

Hobi-hyung has this weird habit of kissing my ear. I can’t help to wriggle everytime he did that.

I’m amazed with all of them. I am supposed to be a ‘stranger’ who they only need to take care of my well-being before Bang PD asks them to hand me to the police. But, they keep showering me with their love, like I am their own son. Hobi-hyung and Namjoon-hyung even want to bring me to their workplace. They don’t even say that I am troublesome.

Hobi-hyung takes turn to carry me. I put my head on his shoulder and hug him tightly as they start to cross the road.

However, I saw someone at the other side of the road. She is watching us.

Yoonji.

What is she doing here, near our building? Is she looking for me?

Her blank stare was given to the three of us. She looks very sad. Her eyes are red but there is no tear. Only, there is a look of disappointment. She then turns her back and walks away.

“Aaaa! Aaaaa,” I screamed loudly but there’s no way she will hear me due to the busy traffics. There’s no use either if she heard me. What can I say to her with this small mouth of mine?

“What’s wrong honey? Feeling cold?” Hobi-hyung said to me before fixing my little beanie.

“Affuu,” I said with my eyes widened. Hobi-hyung only finds that my action was cute so he pinches my chubby.

“Ayee, don’t be too cute today. Papaseok and Papajoon are not going to fall for you,” Hobi-hyung said cheekily.

I wish to say that I’m tired to be like this. I want my body back. I want to properly speak to you guys again, teasing each other like usual and laugh together. I don’t want to be their burden anymore even though they never complain. I want to help them settle the last minute preparation before our debut.

Also, I want to speak to Yoonji nuna, apologizing to her properly.

“Euu....euuu,” since I am so emotional right now, I don’t realize that I started to cry like a real baby.

One droplet, two droplets, then my eyes completely turned into an opened faucet. Tears keep streaming down and I am also sobbing hardly. Namjoon-hyung and Hobi-hyung stop walking and exchange their looks with each other. They are surprised to see my sudden tantrum.

In the letter, I was said to leave the dorm to find peace. But the reality is, I am here with them, watching them struggling alone without me.

I’m such a useless person. The old man was true. I have become a burden to them. I had made a serious sin, not only to Yoonji nuna, to my brothers as well.

I hardly remember what had happened after I suddenly raged. The last thing I saw was both Namjoon-hyung and Hobi-hyung returned to our dorm quickly. My eyes started to become so blurry. I could hardly listen to things around me.

I really hope that I just die at that moment and put an end to this ridiculous curse of mine.

 

Fever, is something that I really want to avoid. It’s because I don’t want them to get anxious. It’s already four days but my fever is not going down. Jin-hyung volunteers to get me to the clinic with the company’s car despite the early warning from Bang PD. However, they are lucky as Namjoon-hyung was able to console our CEO.

“Okay, he needs to get treatment, I admit it. But please be careful. I’m saying this for your own sake,” Bang PD said to the six of them. He visited me on the second night of my fever, just want to see my condition.

Indeed he is the kindest CEO of the world. We really appreciate his hospitality.

I try my hardest not to cry and not to whine even though my head feels like exploding. Therefore, I make myself sleep most of the time during the day. Sometimes, Tae-hyung and Jimin-hyung force me to wake up as they are worried that I might pass out again.

I am sure that the just begins as my fever is getting worse day by day.

“Jagiya, what is happening to you? Why is your fever still high?” Jin-hyung said to me when I refuse to eat. I am hungry, but I cannot eat since I always want to vomit.

This is a punishment for me.

They had put the cold pack on me countless time but the decrement of my temperature is not that satisfying.

Whatever it is, I force myself to eat as I am too hungry only to vomit everything out later. At least, by doing this, the members still know that I have hope to cure from my sickness. They also change the milk given for me with quite the expensive one as they thought that I dislike it.

Please don’t do this to me. Enough is enough. I am not their responsibility at first place but why are they treating me like this? They don’t know that I am Jungkook but they keep pampering me.

God, if I am to leave this world later, please take care of my brothers. Shower them with your blessings and never let them be sad. Fill their lives with success and make everyone in this world love and treasure them. They are the most precious things that I have in this world.

 

Bang PD seems to be worried so much about me.

“I think you guys can no longer watch after him. His condition is getting worse, so tomorrow, bring him to the hospital. I’ll contact my acquaintance to find his parent. This is my mistake as well. I should not let you guys do this just because of our reputation. I am so selfish, I’m sorry,” Bang PD said to all of the members. They just looked down when Bang PD was talking, knowing that they will lose me.

“So, enjoy your last day with him. No activity for you guys today, just fill in your time playing with him. Who knows that miracle might happen,” Bang PD said before leaving our dorm.

Despite that, it cannot take away the sadness from all of their faces.

Yoongi-hyung lifts me up. He looks at me before kissing my cheek. Yoongi-hyung, even though most of the time he is expressionless, but I know that his heart is full of affections, only he doesn’t know how to show it very often.

“It’s not that we don’t like you, but this is the best. I hope that when you had grown up, you will remember these uncles’ faces,” he said to me.

I look at him weakly before blinking my eyes. Truthfully, I am frustrated too. In the letter that they first found on my bed, it said that I will be back after 10 days. I have high hope that it actually means that I will return to my old body after 10 days. But, what if I am wrong? I am afraid that this curse is endless and I will continue to be a baby. If I am not returning back tomorrow, what will they do? What will my mom, dad and my brother feel?

“Guys, I found this girl standing outside of our dorm,” Namjoon-hyung suddenly broke the silent.

“She said that she wants to see Jungkook since he didn’t attend school this week,”he added.

A girl? Would it be...

Yoonji appears at our living room. She looks like she just came back from school as she is wearing her school uniform. She looks tired when she steps in.

“She said that....she is-“

“WAS. I’m no longer his girlfriend,” Yoonji cuts Namjoon-hyung’s words.

“I’m sorry that I was rude, but it hurts me whenever I think about that,” Yoonji-said to them. Namjoon-hyung invites Yoonji to sit before extending their conversations.

“Aaah,” I respond to her a little bit. All eyes are looking at me since it’s my first time reacting after my fever.

“Who’s child is that?” Yoonji asked them.

There goes the long explanation of how I suddenly appeared at our living room and what not. Also, they told her about my letter from last week.

“He...left? How can he suddenly he left?” Yoonji asked the members.

“He said that he can’t keep up with the busy routines. He said that he was so stressed and need to clear up his mind,” Jimin-hyung answered in behalf of the members.

Yoonji is silent for a while before she asks the next question.

“Did he say....what troubles him so much?” she asked with hesitation. Just now, she looked very tired and disappointed but now, she looks very anxious.

“He didn’t tell everything in the letter, only he said that our schedules and his school life messed up his mind,” Tae-hyung answered Yoonji.

“It’s my fault,” Yoonji suddenly said that. Tears start to stream down her pale face.

The members, of course, are surprised with her sudden reaction. I am not excluded to be surprised.

“I.....don’t know that he didn’t like me. He didn’t say anything either so that’s why I am so angry. It’s like he was giving me a false hope. How can I notice it if he keeps obeying what I want him to do? It’s like he had no problems with me until suddenly...he can’t bear with it anymore.” Yoonji is now sobbing hardly.

“I thought that everything was his fault and I was the real victim here. I asked all of his friends and their answers were the same, he thinks that I am his burden. But, why didn’t he admit it? Why, the turning point is I am the one at fault?” she continued. The other members listen to her words carefully.

“It hurts my head very much to think about him. I always asked myself, is this relationship good to both of us? Will both of us end up this bond tragically? I am so scared that he will hate me. I treasure him very much and I don’t want him to hate me,” Yoonji added.

“He noticed that I am quite unusual before we started to fight the next day. If he disliked me so much, why bother asking me about my condition, like he cared for me? What was he thinking? That kid made me so confused,”

Yoonji continues to cry.

“ Just now, when you said that his school life bothered him very much, I can’t help to blame myself. I was so stupid all these while. I am so ego. I remembered how we start this so called relationship, it’s because I didn’t give him chance to say his opinions. He agreed with me because I force him to do so, I admit it. It’s not that I didn’t notice that he was uncomfortable, but sometimes he also showed me that he cared about me. And at other times, he also showed me that he wanted to run away,”

Her words make me think. So, I did make her confuse.

“I am so embarrassed, maybe it’s just me that feels this way while he might want me to disappear from his life,” Yoonji ended her sentence.

Hobi-hyung passes a tissue paper to her. Yoonji snorts hardly with it, like she does not care about her looks anymore.

“What’s your name girl?” Hobin-hyung asked her.

Indeed, she came into our dorm without any introduction. I found that this situation is very comical (of course as she blatantly admit that she was my GF and crying without even care about my brothers existence- sorry nuna) and Hobi-hyung seems to cannot read the mood carefully so I can’t no longer hold my giggle.

Only a small giggle and all of my hyungs look at me with a surprise look.

“He giggles,” Yoongi-hyung said. There’s a light of hope in their looks.

“What’s wrong? Is he sick?” Yoonji asked them. The members nod simultaneously.

What astonishes me more is that she suddenly comes toward me and makes an ugly face.

Her face was so ugly so I burst into my baby laugh...goodness since when she became so extra?

The members smile fondly listening to my laughter. It’s like a therapy to them I guess.

“I think he likes you,” Yoongi-hyung passes me to Yoonji nuna. Yoonji takes me away from his arm without hesitation.

Yoonji is also one kind of tsundere, so she just looks at me without a smile. With her face covered with traces of tears, she looks like an ogre to me therefore I smile again as it is too hilarious.

Am I like to be spoiled like this? This is such a serious situation but I just want to make fun of it. Don’t blame me.

“No, I am serious. What’s your name?”Hobi-hyung came back to his topic.

“Yoonji. Min Yoonji,” she said.

Now, everyone spares their looks at Yoongi-hyung.

“Is she your sister, hyung? Look at you guys, same manners, only different feelings,” Tae-hyung suddenly spoke.

“Yeah, and she looks like you a little bit,” Jimin-hyung added. I also admit it after making some comparison between both of them. Yoongi-hyung is quite smaller than me, so does Yoonji. Both of them has the same gaze- cold. The only difference is that Yoongi-hyung wears pant while Yoonji nuna wears skirt.

“Pfffft,” I can’t help to laugh again. Yoonji gives me a piercing stare so I just look down.

“No, I don’t know her,” Yoongi-hyung answered with a flat voice(meaning that he’s not kidding).

“How old are you,” he asked Yoonji.

“I’m two years older than Jungkook,” she answered. Yoongi-hyung nod as he does not want to further this conversation.

There’s a long pause afterwards. I take this chance to pull Yoonji’s hair. I’m a baby and I am currently sick, so I have rights to do anything that I want. However, Yoonji just pouts and let me continue to make fun of her.

“I don’t think that he dislikes you, Yoonji,” Jin-hyung suddenly breaks the silent.

“We have been living together for quite a long time, so we know what kind of person he is,” he added.

Indeed he is. Moreover he is the eldest so he knows us, his dongsaengs very well.

“Firstly, I apologize for his behalf. Jungkook is not used to girl. He rarely interacts with them unless it is necessary,” Jin-hyung stops to take his breath.

“Maybe, just maybe that he feels uneasy since this might be the first time he encounters with this kind of relationship. He’s a shy person, so he might not know how to interact with you. Nevertheless, when you said that Jungkook sometimes looked like he cared about you, I think it means something else,” Jin-hyung added.

“What kind of something else?” Yoonji asked.

“When did he show that he was comfortable with you?” Jin-hyung asked Yoonji back rather than answering her.

“Well, umm, when we walked together, during our lunch when I used to share my food with him, during our study group when he needed my consultation, when I always rooted for him for to do well in sports,”

“See? That kid actually didn’t hate you. If he dislikes you then he will forever be cold towards you. As his brothers, we have been neglected by him countless times. But there are always times when he also showed his affections towards us,” Jin-hyung said to her.

“He was right. You know Yoonji, I’m his number one victim. Being thrown away, being hit and being neglected are the usual things that he did to me especially when I . But it doesn’t mean that he hates me. He helps me a lot during our practice, prepares me food when I was sick and always enlighten our mood with his narcissistic jokes,” Jimin-hyung said.

Hold on, since when I am a narcissist?

“I don’t know whether this might hurt you or not. I think he only sees you as his sister, not as his lover,”Yoongi-hyung helps to clear up the conversation.

“Aaaai,” I give my respond this time, indicating that I agree with his statement.

That was what I want to say all this while. I don’t hate you nuna. You are so adorable and kind and I like you a lot. But, to make you my lover, it is very unusual for me.

“Tell me Yoonji, are you okay if later you found out that he actually thought of you like that?” Namjoon-hyung asked her.

Yoonji does not give an immediate response, instead, she fixes my position on his lap and looks at me.

I look at her with my round eyes, acting cute because I’m afraid that she will start to sob again.

She smiles and giggles at me, but a tear still stream down her cheeks. Did I just fail?

“Okay.....okay....Fine then. JK, I’ll let you go. Being a sister to you does not hurt very much. As long as you don’t hate me, then I am fine with it,” she said while looking through my eyes. It feels like we are having a heart-to-heart conversation.

“ I’m going home now, thank you for lending me your ears. Actually, I start to feel embarrassed to you guys. I suddenly came here and told you about these, god I need to fix my reputation. Please keep it as a secret. Also, don’t tell him that I came here, he might get angry,” Yoonji said while rubbing away her tears. She gives me to Jimin-hyung and picks up her bag.

“Tell him to forgive me...and I forgive him as well,” that were her last words before she exits our dorm.

I was mesmerized with her last sentence. To forgive and to be forgiven.

 

It happens again. I suddenly feel hot and itchy, like my body is burning. Only this time, it is stronger. Jin-hyung had checked my temperature but the reading of my body only shows 37 degree Celcius. It means that I’m the only one that feel the hotness.

Due to the itchiness, I scratch my face countless time and start hurting myself. The members try their hard to stop me. They think that I am having fever again and raging because of it. I try to crawl out from the living room since I want to shower myself under cold water very badly, but I forget that a baby can’t do very much.

I can’t bear the pain anymore, therefore I cried loudly and again, cause a chaos inside our dorm. Jimin-hyung and Tae-hyung try to entertain me with toys but I don’t want to play. Hobi-hyung tries to feed me but I refuse to eat. Yoongi-hyung and Namjoon-hyung takes turn to snuggle me but all I feel is the burning sensation under my flesh, so I cry even loud. It is not stopping. For this 10 days only, I am dying three times!

Jin-hyung puts a cold pack on my head and start undressing me. He then wipes my small body with a towel soaked in ice water. It helps me a little, so I suddenly stop crying. My face had swollen due to the tears and I am sobbing slowly.

“It seems like he had a fever again,” Jin-hyung said to them.

“Just now you checked him right? I thought that the fever had gone,” Tae-hyung said to him.

“I don’t know. I’m not sure anymore. Something is bothering him but I don’t know what it is. This ice helps him at least,” Jin-hyung said again.

“I’m going to sleep with him tonight. You guys should go to bed as well,” Jin-hyung commands the others.

To his surprise, the other members pull out their blankets and pillows to the living room.

“This is our last night with the baby, we are sleeping here as well. Bang PD is going to take him away tomorrow, so this is the only chance that we have before saying goodbye,” Yoongi-hyung said for the behalf of the others.

“As you wish,” Jin-hyung does not restrict.

The members surround me that night. They take turn to keep me cool with the wet towel. I am not crying anymore since the hotness starts to fade.

Jimin-hyung is the best when it comes to lullaby. When the other members had sleep, he snuggles between Jin-hyung and me so that he will be able to sing to me.

“Aigoo, Jin-hyung had passed out but you are still awake, little one,” he said while patting me slowly.

“Remember that we always love you. Go away, go away the pain,” he said and kisses my little hands before continue to pat me.

 

The members’ snoring becomes a music to my ear. Listening to their snoring makes me feel safer even though I don’t know what will be my fate tomorrow morning.

Where will Bang PD bring me to? He might bring me to the hospital to get further treatment but where will I be sent to afterwards? Am I going to be sent to the orphanage?

Thinking about this makes me feel discourage. I am not an orphan, I still have my parents and families, but it is impossible for them to recognize me in this state. Whatever it is, this curse is something that go against the logic.

10 days had passed, the members had promised to tell my family about this matter.

However, they just know that I ran away from the dorm, not that I was turned into a baby.

My family will be very disappointed. I am not a rebellious child though. The truth can only be buried deep in my heart without anyone knowing it.

I can see that the sun had rose as there is a shine of light behind the curtain, yet the members are still asleep.

I turn my body to the left, facing Jimin-hyung. This guy is still snoring lightly. I reach my hand to his face as I start to feel sorrow. I’m going to leave you guys for real, goodbye.

“Jin-hyung, I told you not to touch my face to wake me up. I’m going to have pimples later because of you,” Jimin-hyung mumbled while pushing my hand away. His eyes are still closed tightly.

He still does not let my hand go, and for a second I realise something.

My hand, it is big?

I force Jimin-hyung to let me go and quickly touch my face.

My face is bigger, my hair is quite bushy, my arms are longer and muscular. To confirm everything, I poke my Adam apple. (it happens automatically)

It is there! I’m back! I’m no longer a baby!

“Jagiya, why are you rustling aggressively early this morning, go back to sleep,” Jimin-hyung is still muttering. His hands were put on my abs(I can proudly say that it’s an abs as I got my body back) and he patted me there like he wants to put me to sleep again.

I cringe when he does that so I shove his hand away.

“Aigoo, honey. Uncle want to sleep more.. Why are you so energetic this morning? Let us sleep for a while and I’ll give you your milk later, arasso?” Jimin-hyung added and hugs me tightly. I almost screamed when he did that so I quickly cover my mouth with both of my hands, making sure that I stay silent.

I need to escape, I can’t stand this. My heart is beating really fast as I found that this situation is really weird and Jimin-hyung’s face is only an inch from mine!

“Why I feel like you are getting bigger?” Jimin-hyung is still muttering with his eyes shut. However, this time his hand is brought to my face and he touches it. He also pulls my hair and my nose.

“I’m not kidding, why are you so big?” Jimin-hyung finally opened his eyes and for a moment-

“Arrrrrrghhhhh!” Jimin-hyung screamed loudly when he saw my face. His scream are able to wake up the other members.

“Jungkook-ah! Why are you here?!” Jimin-hyung asked me in panic. I guess I should let him continue to be frightened for a while before I can answer his question. It’s no use to explain to him while he is still panic.

“Kookie? You are back?” Jin-hyung who sleeps next to me woke up drastically and asked me the question.

For a moment, I let all of them to recover from the shock before I can say anything.

“You are Jungkook. You are really back! And.....?” Jin-hyung stares at my body. I’m lucky because I already pulled the blanket to cover my bottom, so the only part of my body that is exposed is the upper side.

“What have you done to me?” Jin-hyung suddenly embraced himself while staring at me like I just did something bad to him.

“What are you talking about?! Don’t you dare to say that I just you, idiot!” I scream towards him spontaneously. It can’t be helped. My pride comes first.

“Then explain to us what is going on and where is the baby?” Jin-hyung seems to not recover from his trauma.

“I was the baby,” I finally said the truth.

 

“So, you want to say that you have been...cursed?” Namjoon-hyung asked me. I nod to his question.

“ I can’t believe it,” Hobi-hyung said to me.

“It’s normal if you don’t believe it. I can’t believe it either but that’s the truth,” I said to him.

There is a long silent afterwards. Their brains might be processing the words that I’ve said just now.

“Okay, if you don’t believe me, let me tell you what have you guys did to the baby, starting from the moment Jimin-hyung found him until last night,” and there goes the long story of mine, being told again to all of them. I need their trust so that this problem will be settled forever.

“Okay, but how? How can you turned into a baby? What is the caused?” Yoongi-hyung took turn to ask me.

“I told you, hyung. I was cursed. That’s the only explanation that I can give to you,”

“There must be a reason! I mean, what have you done until you were being cursed?” Yoongi-hyung still demands an explanation from me.

I think hardly. So long until finally I jump into a conclusion.

“It must be the old man, I knew it’s him because of the joker stamp that I saw on the envelope,” I said to him.

“Which old man?” Jin-hyung asked me.

Again, I tell them my stories from A to Z, which it also involves Yoonji.

“Don’t blame her. She has nothing to do with this. I’m sure that it was the old man who did this to me,” I beg them since they seemed to frown a little bit when I said Yoonji’s name.

Enough with all the troubles. I don’t want to start any conflict with her again.

“Dude, it felt like a magic,” Tae-hyung said to me.

“ It was a magic,” I said.

“So,for all this while...you were here, beside us? The baby was you?” Jimin-hyung asked me. I nod slowly, indicating that he is correct.

“Then, all this while, the baby that we used to feed, bathed, cleaned his poop and kissed for these 10 days was-“Jin-hyung seemed not to finish his sentence.

“It was ME,” I said to all of them.

You know what they do afterwards? All of them run the bathroom and throw up. They might feel nasty for kissing me a lot for these 10 days.

Tsk, I thought that they like me a lot.

I go to the kitchen, finding something to eat for breakfast while the others are still vomiting inside the bathroom.

I can’t help to devilishly laugh at them. I sip the milk a little bit and accidentally spurt it out as suddenly I remember about the incident.

 

The next day, I attend the school as usual. Jin-hyung drives me there. When I entered the class, lots of questions were asked by my friends so I just tell them that I purposely didn’t attend school for almost two weeks because I was sick.

Hey, it’s the truth though. I was sick but my sickness was rare because it was caused by a curse.

During the lunch hour, I gained my courage to meet Yoonji nuna but to my surprise, her friends told me that she just moved out from school. Her father just got promoted and was asked to move to Ulsan so she and her families need to follow him there.

Hmm, it feels like a drama. Whenever a couple broke up and the guy wants to meet his ex-girlfriend to properly apologize, the girl had moved out to the other school.

As far as I know, during my last day as a baby, Yoonji had forgive me so I feel quite relieve. At least, I don’t have any unsettled business with her.

Jin-hyung called and told me that he has a meeting until 6 today. Again, I need to walk home.

About the baby, Namjoon-hyung needed to lie to Bang PD. He said that the real parents had came to us and begged to take him away. Namjoon-hyung also said that the parents apologize for neglecting their responsibilities and causing us great troubles. To make everything smooth, Namjoon-hyung told Bang PD that the ‘parents’ had promised to keep this matter as a secret as it also involves their prides and reputations .

There it goes. Everything had ended and I feel grateful that I’m back.

I kick the stone on the road as I start to feel bored. There’s no need to hurry either since I have no work to do today. The teachers are so kind for not giving us any homework or group project, maybe they thought that we are already loaded with schoolwork and exam is just two weeks away, so they might want to give us time to do revision at home.

The stone lands near a dustbin. I recognize this place. This is where I met the old man.

To my surprise, he was there, rummaging inside the dustbin.

I approach him.

“Ahjushhi, are you searching for your cards again?” I said to him sarcastically. I don’t know what makes me so brave. If it is really him that sent me the curse, I should just avoid him. But my heart is against my will, there is something that I need to settle with him.

“Oh, young man, how do you know? Please help me, I need that card very badly. My life depends on it,” he said. Doesn’t he recognize me?

“You don’t know me?” I asked him. He looks at me with his old eyes and stares for a while.

“Cards,” he said again and ignores me.

I am quite irritated but I have no will to fight with him again. I’m afraid to just leave him either. Who knows that he might be upset and turns me into a baby again?

Therefore, I go behind him, trying to search for the card that might stuck behind his pocket.

Told you. It was there, at the same place.

I hesitate to pull it out as I am so nervous. What kind of card that it will be? Hopefully, it’s not a joker.

I close my eyes and pull it out from the pocket.

I’m ready to open my eyes in three, two, one-

“No need to worry,” I heard the old man’s voice and open my eyes slowly. He is looking at me with a smile.

“Look at it,” he commanded me. I look down at the card and examine it.

A butterfly.

“What does this card mean?” I asked him like he already knew about the meaning of the card. He’s not a fortune-teller but I just want to ask him.

“Butterfly? It means that you are free. From a crawling worm, you turn into a butterfly. You have lifted up all of the problems that trouble you so much. You’ve grown up and ready to receive more responsibilities with your teammates. See that two clovers over there? It means luck. One day, your name will be said by most people. Not just that, everyone who knows you now or later will love and protect you with all their might. In return, you also bring such a fortune to them,” he said.

“Will I turn into a butterfly later? Ahjushhi, I apologize for being rude to you but please forgive me. I’ve done wrong,” I took his hands and begged for his forgiveness.

“You did nothing wrong to me. Your fault is to the people that love you. Your parents, your family, your brothers and Yoonji. You failed to know that they actually love you until a big problem fall onto you and your life depends solely on their help. At that moment only, you can discover the meaning of true love. It is not something that should be taken for granted, young man. Learn to appreciate it,” he said.

I fall into silent.

“A baby means that you are still fragile and needs people around you to root for you. A joker means that deep inside your heart, there is a dark side that refuse to see the meaning of love,”he added.

“Tell me Jungkook, will you stay by their side, whatever happens to them? Will you love them like how they love you?” he asked me.

“I always love them,” I answered him.

“Then, it’s good for you. May God bless you in your entire life,” he said before putting the butterfly card inside my pocket. I have no word to say to him. He then leaves me. I am still standing there, thinking about the words that have been said by him. Then, I pull out the card that he had inserted inside my pocket and stare at it.

So, the curse and the letter were all his doing, were they? Tsk, I forgot to confirm about it.

“Ahjushhi, was it you that-“ I did not finish my sentence since he was not there anymore. He disappeared.

Where is that old man?

It’s already dark and I can hear that the dogs suddenly wail. I remember that my mom said to me if the dogs suddenly wail during the dusk, I should get into house quickly as it is a sign that a demon is following me.

 

It’s almost 4 years since our debut. Our schedules are getting packed day by day and we have no time to complain. Next project is our Festa. I’m preparing myself to practice with Jin-hyung and Yoongi-hyung for our cover of So Far Away, which was originally sang by Yoongi-hyung and Suran. It’s going to be a great present to ARMYs all around the world. I hope that they will like it.

“Kookie-yah, buy me dinner after this,” Jin-hyung suddenly ordered me.

“Okay, give me your card,” I told him, making a win-win situation. If I’m going out to get him dinner, he must treat me.

“Aigoo, you never spend money on me. I really want you to treat me,” Jin-hyung begged me.

“Then I’ll give you my card and you go get it for both of us,” I said to him, still don’t want to lose.

Jin-hyung pouts and makes faces towards me. I grin widely looking at how silly his face is.

“Fine then, I’ll treat you. But you owe me a massage. Hyung’s back feel like it’s going to break anytime soon,” he pleaded me.

“I’M NOT YOUR WIFE,”

“BUT YOU ARE THE DONGSAENG,” checkmate! I have no ideas left to beat his words.

Okay, I can’t sleep early today. It’s all because of Jin-hyung.

“You are already old, hyung,” I said to him.

“What? You think you are not going to age?”he bashed me.

“Think about your age when I had grown old,” I bashed him back.

“What’s so bad about it? Yah, one day, you and I will together become fossils and be buried deep in the ground so don’t be cocky about your age,” Jin-hyung is not going to lose to me.

“Arasso hyung! Okay, now go get me my dinner,”

“I only said that I’m going to treat you, not that I’m going out to get it for you!”

“Fine, I’m not going out either,”

“Then no dinner for both of us! Okay, fine!”

“LET’S JUST STARVE AND GO TO SLEEP,”

“YOU THINK I CAN’T HANDLE A ONE NIGHT STARVING?!”

“Good for you hyung! No massage either!”

“Arasso!”

“Arasso!” I said back to him.

Forgive us, we just want to bicker everytime, no deep feeling.

“Guys, let’s have our dinner together. Namjoon had booked a place for all of us,” Yoongi-hyung suddenly appeared and invited us out.

“Oh really, where?” Jin-hyung suddenly moved on from our fight just now. He is very fast when it comes to food. Food matters more than our endless bickering.

“There’s a new restaurant at the end of the junction there, Tae and Jimin said that its food were worth its price..I don’t know what does that actually mean...maybe they want to say that everything is delicious but quite expensive,” Yoongi-hyung said to us.

“Let’s go now,” I hurried them. I’ve skipped my lunch just now and currently hungry.

“Yeah, let’s go. This baby needs to be feed on time,” Jin-hyung said to me. I automatically slap his left arm for reminding me about that embarrassing moment when they used to feed me...on time.

“What? Be proud when we call you baby. You like your age that much right?” he seems not to give up.

“Oh my, can you guys please stop for a while? Since just now you guys were so noisy I can’t keep up with my works, duh” Yoongi-hyung finally complains.

And our fight officially ends (only for this night, I’m sure there will be another word fighting between the maknae and the eldest again tomorrow)

We walk together to the restaurant. Our neighbours had recognized us so there are rarely fans that chased after us for autographs or what not. Everything just seems in peace.

Yoongi-hyung and Jin-hyung enter the restaurant and join the others. The atmosphere is very welcoming and warm with our chats and laughter.

For a moment, I take this chance to look at their faces one by one.

They are not just the members that I was assigned to work with. They are more than that. They are my second family which I treasure the most. Looking at how they love me and always root for me, I know that they are the most precious gifts given by God to me. The destiny that I should be grateful for having it in my life.

Kim Seokjin, MinYoongi, Kim Namjoon, Jung Hoseok, Park Jimin and Kim Taehyung. They are the brothers that I will love for my entire life.

I wish that this bond will always be with us forever.

I love you guys. Thank you for always be by my side.