It had been four years since BTS debuted as an idol hip-hop group under Big Hit Entertainment agency. It had been four years since Yoongi, Namjoon, and Hoseok were introduced as Suga, Rap Monster and J-Hope. And it definitely had been a very tough four years for the three young men.

It had been so tough, yet it was not that they didn’t enjoy it though. It’s their biggest dream after all. It’s Yoongi’s biggest dream after all.

BTS was known worldwide now. They had loyal fans from all over the world, and they surely treasured their fans a lot. Yes, Yoongi was always so thankful of their fans. He was grateful that countless people could support and love them with all their hearts. And honestly, Yoongi loved them too, so much.

It was not an easy path for BTS to get there. They needed to work their asses off for that. And also, many things needed to be sacrificed for that. But all of the hard work and sacrifices paid off in the end, right?

It was raining hard now as Yoongi absentmindedly looking the wet air through the window from the living room. He was home alone now as Namjoon and Hoseok went to the studio in the company building earlier that day.

They didn’t necessarily need to work since it was the first day of a very rare three-day off for them. But Namjoon and Hoseok seemed have a plan to keep working on their days off. And apparently Yoongi didn’t have the same plan.

It’s not that Yoongi was a lethargic human being. Well, yeah, Yoongi sort of was. But that wasn’t the case. Because in the different day, he would never waste his time to be un-ing-productive and day dreaming all day. But today was not that day, today Yoongi was still not feeling well, and today was raining so hard to match his gloomy mind.

Yoongi was perfectly fine yesterday. He even planned to go to the studio with Namjoon and Hoseok for the day off. Just yesterday, everything went as planned, and really, nothing could possibly go wrong in a mere second. Except, there was this thing happened.

Last evening, Yoongi was visiting this newly opened restaurant by himself because several days ago one of their company staff told him that their lamb skewers were truly recommended. And Yoongi was always craving for lamb skewers apparently, and it made him went to the other side of the town to that said restaurant. No one really wanted to go with him, neither Namjoon nor Hoseok. But it didn’t stop Yoongi.

After putting on his black mask, white cap – thank God his now black hair not going to make him stood out – and hooded black coat, he drove – his manager’s private car – there calmly.

It was 40 minutes later that the black-haired man was seated in a cozy seat near the window in the restaurant, and no one recognized him in his disguise yet. Everything went relatively well at first. Until the moment he heard that voice.

That melodic laugh.

Yoongi had been looking at the menu quietly when he heard it. The voice that he would never forget. That he could never forget. The sweet voice that he would always recognize any day. The laugh that he had loved to listen. That he apparently still loved to listen.

The hooded man looked up to the entrance spontaneously. That’s when Yoongi saw him.

The black haired rapper suddenly felt heated. He could feel his heart beating fast. And his lips went dry. Surely, that person still had a certain effect on him. Park Jimin still had a certain effect on Min Yoongi.

Jimin almost looked the same as he was three years ago, except his hair was soft pink now (Yoongi could remember it was brown the last time he saw Jimin three years ago). Jimin still had that baby fat clinging on his cheeks –and it looked cute dammit – He still laughed with that bright crescent-shaped eyes. And he still talked animatedly.

Jimin was still endearing. He still effortlessly gorgeous. And Yoongi undoubtedly was still in love with him.

Jimin was always small Yoongi knew. But he looked even smaller now as he was standing next to a tall man whose arm was linked with Jimin’s hands. Uhm- wait. What?

Yoongi frowned. He had just realized that Jimin was not alone. Jimin was laughing happily with a tall handsome – Yoongi had to admit – man. The man’s hair was light brown, and his bunny smile made him looked youthful, and Yoongi envied him.

There was a sudden pang in Yoongi’s heart that he was almost no longer familiar with.

Yoongi didn’t know how long he had been staring until a waiter came and asked him his order. The rapper snapped back into reality and he didn’t think he still wanted to eat after that. That’s pretty much why he abruptly left the restaurant, leaving a confused waiter standing awkwardly there.

And that’s also why he decided to not to go to studio with his band mates this morning. He had said that he was not feeling well and his friends knew not to pry him more.

Yoongi never thought that he was over Jimin. No. He knew he would never over that boy. The boy was too precious for Yoongi to forget. Yoongi just kept his feeling locked in a secret box deep down his heart. Now the box floated. It had been unlocked by that certain beautiful smile, and he couldn’t help but recall.

 

 

**

 

 

It was a bright Friday afternoon that day and Yoongi had just got the news. Yoongi was running fast as soon as the meeting was over. He was running from the company building to the place where he knew he could meet Jimin.

Jimin was Yoongi’s boyfriend. Jimin was his first real love. Jimin was so important. Jimin was the one Yoongi shared everything with. Jimin was the one Yoongi talked everything to. And as soon as Yoongi got the news, telling Jimin was the only thing that came into his mind.

Yoongi arrived in front of Jimin’s school gate in ten minutes. The school had finished five minutes ago and many students in their uniforms were starting to leave the place. Yoongi looked at the school gate expectantly. He was bouncing slightly when he was waiting for the younger. He was just too excited to keep still.

Yoongi’s smile grew even more when he saw Jimin and his group of friends were approaching the gate.

“Jiminnie!” Yoongi called.

The said boy who was talking animatedly with his friends turned to Yoongi, “Oh- Hyung!” he beamed.

Jimin ran to Yoongi soon after saying ‘good bye’ to his friends.

The brunette haired boy greeted Yoongi with a tight hug as soon as he was right in front of him. The younger never cared of people’s stares, and Yoongi was still trying to not to care.

“What are you doing here, Hyung?” Jimin asked curiously after he released Yoongi from the hug.

Yoongi looked around and dragged Jimin away from the passing students before them. He was excited in telling the younger about the news. But he knew better than to say it out loud, especially here, in the crowd full of teenagers with curious ears. Yoongi dragged his boyfriend to find an emptier spot on the sidewalk.

Yoongi faced Jimin and looked at the cute boy in front of him. Jimin was looking at him curiously, and maybe a little bit worriedly. Yoongi held Jimin’s shoulders and talked softly yet excitedly, “It’s fixed now. I’m going to debut in five months, Jiminnie!”

Jimin widened his eyes. His brown eyes gleamed with excitement and Yoongi was drowned in those beautiful eyes. “OH MY GOD! OH MY GOD! OH MY GOD!” Jimin was bouncing before he enveloped Yoongi in another tight embrace. “Oh my God! Hyung! That’s awesome! Oh my God! I’m so happy!”

Jimin was loud and people were starting to stare at them. But Yoongi didn’t care right now, Jimin was gleaming and sending all his warmth into Yoongi’s body, so he hugged Jimin back as tightly.

“Your dream is coming true, Hyung. Oh my God. I’m so proud of you.” Jimin muffled onto Yoongi’s shoulder.

Yoongi felt so warm. He was blissful. Making Jimin proud of him was one of dreams that he unconsciously needed to achieve more.

Yoongi pulled back from the hug to look at his endearing boyfriend. He then smiled to the younger and took his hand to intertwine it with his. “Come on. I’ll buy you some ice cream.” He dragged Jimin to the ice cream stall nearby.

And the younger boy followed him, swinging their intertwined hands excitedly.

 

 

“So Hyung, what did they say about the debut?” Jimin said while his vanilla ice cream in his right hand. While his left hand was holding the strawberry one because-- ‘Buy me two, Hyung. You’re gonna be rich as hell. And I want you to learn to waste your penny wisely.’ And Yoongi hadn’t even thought to say no to that.

They were now sitting on a bench in a nearby park. Yoongi was looking at the younger boy who was religiously enjoying the ice cream. He was amused.

“Uhm yea, so today they gave us the exact date, and the exact number of members, and a particular name of the group.” Yoongi looked at Jimin who only hummed in response while enjoying his ice cream. “And it would be on June 13th this year. I will debut in a group consist of three members, you know Namjoon and Hoseok right?” Yoongi saw Jimin nodded then he continued, “Yea, they will be my band mates, not that I didn’t expect it before. Seokjin wouldn’t match our concept, I think he will be debuted solo.” Yoongi shrugged. “Ah- and our group’s name would be Bangtan Sonyeondan.”

Jimin suddenly snorted and almost choked on his ice cream. “I’m sorry- What??”

Yoongi sighed. “I somehow knew how you would react to that.” He glared at the shorter boy who seemed had almost finished his first ice cream, and now laughed hard beside him.

“I’m sorry, Hyung. That was just so- uhm- incredible.” Jimin tried to suppress his laugh.

“Thanks, Brat.” Yoongi rolled his eyes.

“So, you would be like, ‘Hi, I’m Yoongi of Bangtan Sonyeondan-‘” Jimin deepened his voice to match Yoongi’s. He then started to his second ice cream.

Yoongi chuckled. “It’s Suga.”

“Hm?” The brown haired boy looked up and raised his brows.

“My stage name would be Suga.” Yoongi said.

“Suga?”

“Yea.” Yoongi shrugged because he personally thought that it’s not so bad.

“Suuugaa” Jimin said softly, as if testing the new word in his tongue. And Yoongi decided that he really loved the sound of it.

“You like it?” Yoongi asked his boyfriend who continued eating his ice cream.

The younger boy turned to Yoongi again, “Yea, I like it.” He beamed. “It suits you.”

Yoongi couldn’t help but smile. He was still looking at the boy beside him. Jimin looked so happy, and it was the sight that Yoongi wanted to witness every day. Actually no, scratch that, he wanted to see it every single second. It was so endearing and it made Yoongi somehow relief. Jimin was Yoongi’s source of happiness. And Yoongi wanted to be with him forever.

It was cheesy and quite ridiculous to really think about it. Yoongi realized that he was still young, hell, Jimin was even younger. They were really young when they found out about their feelings for each other.

Well, they didn’t really understand it back then. It was happened on one of their serious conversations almost spontaneously. Jimin suddenly said something that Yoongi apparently had been thinking about too, ‘Hyung, I don’t know why, but I’m so happy when I’m with you. And- and it makes me always want to be with you. And it- it’s just different, what I feel about you is different and I’m confused. I just-’

And Yoongi, stunned Yoongi, only looked into Jimin’s nervous eyes, and tried to process the words. Yoongi was sure that he saw tears were starting to form in those beautiful eyes. Oh no- no. A sad-crying Jimin was the last thing that Yoongi wanted to witness.

Yoongi then embraced the younger boy and patted his hair gently. ‘I understand, Jiminnie. I totally understand because- because I’m feeling it too. You’re different, I don’t know you’re just- uhm—important. You are so important and special. And I’m so happy when I’m with you. So I think- I think we- we should stay together. Let’s stay together, shall we?’

And that was nearly two years ago. They were still so young back then. They had been figuring many things out together. And they knew now. They knew that they loved each other, maybe more than anything in the world. Possibly.

“Anyway Hyung, are you going to eat that?”

Yoongi’s mind stopped recalling as he heard Jimin’s sweet voice. He saw Jimin pointed at something in his hand.

Yoongi followed Jimin’s finger and saw a cone of chocolate ice cream which was forgotten and almost melted in his own hand.

A smile formed in Yoongi’s face, “Here.” He gave Jimin the ice cream. “You should eat well and grow. But stay shorter than me, okay?”

Jimin gleamed and took the ice cream from Yoongi. It seemed like he decided to not to care about Yoongi’s teasing at the moment.

Yoongi watched as Jimin started to enjoy his third ice cream. He smiled fondly at the sight. “I would buy all ice creams in the world for you when I’m rich, Jiminnie.”

Jimin looked up at him and beamed, “Really?”

Yoongi nodded, “Yes. Really.” He ruffled Jimin’s soft locks and the other boy leaned into the touch. “And in fact I would buy anything you want. Because I’m super rich and all.”

The younger laughed at his words, “You don’t need to buy me anything though.” He locked his beautiful eyes on Yoongi’s, “Just stay with me is enough.”

Yoongi smiled and nodded. Well, why wouldn’t I?

 

 

**

 

 

And now Yoongi knew why.

It was still raining hard outside and Yoongi still had no intention of moving. It’s miraculous how Jimin’s smile could do this to the rapper. To invade all parts of Yoongi’s mind only with a little appearance.

Well, nothing is surprising, really. Jimin had always been Yoongi’s muse back then. Maybe he still was. Yoongi didn’t really know what he was feeling at the moment. There was a grain of relief, a bit of confusion, a little pain, and a crumb of hope.

Yoongi couldn’t understand it. He even didn’t know what he was supposed to think right now. It’s just the pang in his chest hadn’t left since last night, and he stared at the rain as if it would give him all the answers he needed.

The hard rain made everything outside looked so grey. The sound of it filled the air with sorrow. The rain was totally mocking his pathetic self right now.

Yoongi had tried really really hard to put his heart problem aside, and he kind of did it. He hadn’t think of the chubby-cheeked boy for a while now, and that was great. Really. Yoongi could focus on his career well and everything worked so well, it seemed.

But then Jimin appeared again. Still as ethereal as he was – or maybe even more – and Yoongi was drawn. He was brought back to his old feeling. It was somehow so familiar, it was somehow so homey, and Yoongi arguably wanted to be there once again.

 

 

**

 

 

Yoongi was putting on a mask and a cap when Namjoon entered the room.

“Where are you going, Hyung?” He heard the younger asked.

“Meeting Jimin.” Yoongi answered nonchalantly and looked at the full body mirror in front of him. He looked at the other boy through the mirror.

Namjoon was silent for a while. He seemed to think about something. He then looked up at Yoongi, “Be careful, Hyung. Don’t be careless. I mean, we are now-“

“Yea, yea, I got it. Don’t worry.” Yoongi cut his words. Because yes, he knew that so damn well.

BTS was debuted two months ago and people were starting to recognize them. Yoongi knew that he needed to be careful as an idol, a new one to be exact. Dating was one thing. And dating the same gender was a total different thing.

Yoongi knew that.

However, it’s been nearly three months since the last time he saw Jimin. Few weeks before the debut had been hectic, and it had been even more hectic after the debut. Yoongi couldn’t even find a little time to meet Jimin. And now when he could, he totally wouldn’t waste it.

God, he missed Jimin so much.

“Okay then. Have fun.” Namjoon smiled a little.

Namjoon was their leader, Yoongi could understand him being worried for the group. And Namjoon was also his good friend, Yoongi was glad he was still being supportive for him.

“Thanks.”

Yoongi turned to the younger who was standing on the bedroom threshold. He was about to leave when Hoseok was entering the room.

Hoseok looked at Yoongi from head to toe. “Oh- Hyung? You going somewhere?”

Yoongi sighed because he really didn’t want to deal with another ‘Be careful you’re an idol now’ advice. “Yea, I’m meeting Jimin.” He still answered.

“Oh-“ A smile slowly formed on Hoseok’s face. And he smiled his wide bright smile. “Say hi for me then.”

Well, Yoongi clearly didn’t expect that kind of answer. And He couldn’t help but smile back.

“Ok.” He said while leaving for real.

 

 

“HYUNG!!” Jimin screamed and waved his hand excitedly when Yoongi arrived at the park.

They decided to meet at the place because they knew the park was only visited by the elders. They needed to avoid younger people as many as possible for Yoongi’s sake.

Yoongi smiled behind his mask and approached the boy. He looked around to find some people staring briefly at his boyfriend’s direction and then to him. Yoongi silently hoped that no one would recognize him.

Well, his group was only two months old though. And younger people could hardly recognize him, let alone the elders. Yoongi was sure none of these elders knew him, so he took off his mask and put it in his hoodie’s pocket.

Jimin almost directly jumped and hugged him tightly when he was within the reach, and Yoongi couldn’t help but looked around before he hugged Jimin back.

Jimin pulled back but still keeping Yoongi in his hold. He looked at Yoongi longingly. “Gosh I’ve missed you.” Jimin was half whining and half pouting.

“I’ve missed you too. So bad.” Yoongi pulled the younger back into his hug because he didn’t lie, he had missed the younger’s warmth so much. It was the longest time they didn’t see each other.

Yoongi pecked Jimin’s hair. He knew more people were staring at them right now, but it’s Jimin. It’s his baby. And he smelled so nice. And Yoongi missed him too much to care.

Jimin suddenly chuckled.

Yoongi pulled back from the hug and raised his brows to his boyfriend.

“I watched your debut stage. They’re awesome, Hyung! You’re awesome.” Jimin looked at him almost shyly. “And well, I didn’t manage to get to the fan-sign event, but I came to your fan meeting!”

“Really?” Yoongi’s grin grew wider. Well, he kinda saw a glimpse of his pretty boyfriend in some occasion, but he thought he was just imagining things since he missed the cute boy too much.

“Yeah, it was fun. And you did really great too in the fan meeting.”

Yoongi smiled warmly because he needed that, he wasn’t sure why, but he needed Jimin to tell him he was doing right at least.

“Thank you.” He then said.

Jimin smiled and looked at him fondly, longingly. He then pulled Yoongi closer and buried his face into the crook of Yoongi’s neck. “Hyung, I miss you.” Jimin muttered onto his skin.

Yoongi’s heart clenched at how vulnerable Jimin’s voice was, “I’m here, Baby. I’m here.”

He was not sure how long they were standing like that until later, they decided to go to some Chinese restaurant. Because Yoongi wanted to treat Jimin to all things the younger boy was craving for, as the celebration for his debut.

 

 

**

 

 

A flash of light grabbed Yoongi’s next-to-non-existence attention. It was his phone, which was going off, on the windowsill beside him. Yoongi sighed and took it.

‘We’ll be home as soon as the rain stopped. What do you want for dinner?’

Yoongi stared at his phone. It was a text from Namjoon.

His band mates were probably aware of Yoongi’s state of mind right now. They even planned to go home earlier than they usually were. They usually went home at least when the clock reached eight. And it was barely five in the afternoon from what his phone informed him.

Yoongi didn’t mind of his friends concern though, really. He maybe would go crazy if he was alone a little longer.

But the pouring rain seemed wouldn’t stop anytime soon, so he wasn’t sure if his friends could come home before his sanity totally left him.

The black-haired rapper stared at his phone and his fingers automatically moved to open his gallery. He didn’t even remember that Namjoon’s text needed a reply. His hands worked on their own accord. Because Yoongi suddenly really needed to check something. He scrolled down and scrolled down to check that maybe-

Oh.

There it is.

That was what Yoongi was looking for.

A folder named ‘Your Jiminnie <3’. Which clearly wasn’t named by Yoongi himself.

Yoongi knew well what he would find if he opened the folder. It was full of Jimin’s selcas, which some of them were, no actually most of them were their selcas together.

Yoongi was not sure if he should open it. But his thumb apparently betrayed him again as it tapped on the folder briefly.

 

 

**

 

 

It was a very cold evening on February, and Yoongi was walking on the not-so-quiet sidewalk slowly, with Jimin was walking beside him.

It’s in the late February. There was still a certain atmosphere of Valentine’s Day surrounding the world. They passed a few couples as they walked. And Yoongi realized at how Jimin were looking at each couple longingly. Every couple were holding hands and talking with each other happily. And Yoongi knew Jimin would also hold his hand if Yoongi didn’t keep them inside his coat pocket.

Jimin’s face dropped and Yoongi felt the urge to just- screw everything! And really, he just wanted to gather Jimin in his arms and keep him forever in his embrace. Provided warmth and safety for the boy.

But Yoongi was on his right mind now. So, he didn’t do it.

It had been eight months since his debut and he was aware that BTS was starting to be known globally. He couldn’t be careless. Because apparently, a little mistake could break what they had been building until now. Yoongi and his band mates had built everything since a very long time, and he couldn’t break it for the sake of his own selfishness.

At least, that’s what his manager said yesterday, after he caught Yoongi was talking on his phone with a lover. But boy, if that wasn’t right.

Yoongi glanced at the brown haired boy beside him. Jimin was looking at the distance and then putting his chubby little hands inside his own jacket pocket, copying what Yoongi did earlier. And Yoongi really, really wanted to punch himself now.

Their previous meeting had happened on December, when Yoongi was hospitalized due to appendicitis, and Jimin was constantly visited him then. Now Yoongi and his group were in the middle of a promotion of their new mini album, and the rapper tried hard to manage this date in the middle of their tight schedule.

Yoongi had missed Jimin so damn much. He really, really needed to see Jimin’s pretty face. That. And also, he had felt so damn guilty for not being able to come to Jimin’s graduation three weeks ago. That’s why he asked his boyfriend to meet now. Jimin had answered it with a blatant excitement, and that had made Yoongi excited too.

And now, he kind of regretted his decision because he was sure that he was only hurting Jimin even more right now.

Firstly, Yoongi didn’t hug Jimin back when the younger greeted him, because he was too busy looking around to make sure no one was looking at them.

Secondly, Yoongi hadn’t showed Jimin his face since they met two hours ago. The older came with a mask, a cap, and a hooded coat, because he just didn’t want to risk his band mates’ career too if he screwed things up.

Thirdly, Yoongi flinched when Jimin tried to hold his hand, and then put his hands into his coat pocket in reflex.

Jimin’s face dropped more every time, and Yoongi felt like a total right now.

“Uhm h- hyung?” Jimin’s voice sounded scared and Yoongi wanted to cry, because, seriously? Did he even manage to make Jimin felt scared to speak to him?

“Yea, Jiminnie?” Yoongi answered softly. He didn’t want to break his boyfriend even more.

“I- uhm-” Jimin was looking at his own shadow on the pavement.

“Yes?” Yoongi’s heart was beating fast for unknown reason.

“I mean- uhm-” Jimin glanced at the older and sighed.

Yoongi frowned in confusion.

“No- nothing.” Jimin smiled at him. No, Jimin tried hard to smile at him. “Yes. Nothing. Sorry. It’s nothing.”

Yoongi really wanted to shake Jimin by his shoulders. Yoongi really wanted to scream on Jimin’s pretty face to just tell Yoongi what’s on his mind. He wanted to pry the younger, really. But-

“Okay.”

Jimin paused and turned to look at him. The younger boy frowned. Maybe he couldn’t believe what he just heard. Hell. Even Yoongi himself couldn’t believe what he just said.

Jimin was still looking at him in his confused face, and Yoongi decided to not to look back.

There was a silence for a while before Jimin abruptly took his phone from his pocket.

“Oh- look. My roommate forgot to bring his keys again and he was waiting for me outside the door.” Jimin said nervously, while putting his phone back into his pocket. “I- I think I need to go home now, Hyung.”

Yoongi frowned because Jimin was apparently the worst liar ever. Yoongi knew there was no text, and the younger just made up an excuse to leave.

But he also knew that he had made the other boy uncomfortable, and he didn’t want to hurt the boy more than he had already did all evening.

But wait—

Did Jimin just say roommate? Is he no longer stay with his parents? Since when? Where does he live now?

“Hyung?” Jimin called softly.

“Well, I’ll walk you home then.” Yoongi finally said. He decided not to think of Jimin’s possibility of moving out from his parents’ house without telling Yoongi.

It hurt. The fact that they were slowly drifting apart hurt like hell.

“No- no, Hyung.” Jimin said immediately. “I mean- I’m fine. I- you better go home. I’m fine.”

Yoongi was silence for a while. He didn’t know what to do. What should he do? Should he ask Jimin to stay? Because for God’s sake, he missed Jimin so much, and he just needed Jimin’s presence right now.

.

“O- okay then. Be careful.” Well, Yoongi at least managed to say something.

He was about to hug the younger boy when he suddenly flinched from Yoongi’s touch.

Jimin was flinching from his touch. And Yoongi was taken aback.

It surprisingly hurt Yoongi’s heart to the core. He felt like he was stabbed on his left chest over and over again. It was so painful. . Did Jimin feel like this when Yoongi refuse to hold hands?

Jimin looked away from the rapper. “G- good night, Hyung.” He said before he ran without sparing a glance at Yoongi.

His happiness was running away from him.

Yoongi looked at Jimin’s back until it disappeared from his sight. And then he broke down.

 

 

**

 

 

Yoongi was staring at his phone intently now.

As soon as he opened the folder, he was greeted with many pictures of Jimin and him together. All the happy memories were flooding back. And it brought smiles on Yoongi’s face.

All the pictures reminded him of how happy he was with Jimin, and how happy Jimin was with him.

But they were so young back then. They didn’t know anything about how cruel the world could be. They were so naive. They thought that love was simple. They thought that life was fair.

Yoongi opened one of Jimin pictures.

Jimin was so beautiful in the picture. His brown hair was disheveled, his chubby cheeks were glowing, and his plump lips were so pink.

Yoongi Jimin’s glowing cheeks, more like, his phone’s screen actually.

The rain was starting to stop out there. And Yoongi closed his eyes and hugged his phone on his chest.

For all the highest power in the universe, I wish Jimin would always be happy and be loved wherever he is.

 

 

**

 

 

Yoongi looked at the mirror in front of him. A hair stylist was styling his hair for an interview BTS would attend.

He and his band mates had just been told about the interview by his manager, because apparently the program had just called this morning before they went to the music bank show, their previous schedule.

Yoongi couldn’t focus well on everything he did recently. He forgot some moves and lyrics on stage. And he even spaced out during a live interview. This was really, really bad for him since BTS was getting more and more known now.

But he couldn’t get rid of his guilt towards his boyfriend since their last meeting a month ago. Jimin somehow had decided to not to talk about it again, and Yoongi went along with it.

Their text messages and calls were getting rare, but nothing unusual about it. Yoongi had been so busy since their last comeback and Jimin, the sweetest human being on earth, had never complained about it.

And that had made Yoongi even felt more guilty.

Yoongi felt like an right now. Even though Yoongi never gave Jimin anything, neither a proper date nor a proper explanation, Jimin never demanded him into anything. Jimin was too good for him. Jimin was too perfect.

Yoongi wondered whether they should break up or not. But he loved Jimin too much, and he was too selfish to let the boy go.

Or should he quit instead?

No. Quit had never been in the option. Yoongi loved music so much, and made the world listened to his music had always been his dream. He had almost fulfilled it, no way he would ever break it. And he was making Jimin proud of him with all of this, wasn’t he?

Yoongi felt so weak right now, and he didn’t know what to do.

Hoseok entered the room just in time with Yoongi got his hair done.

Yoongi looked at his friend who was frowning at him.

“Hyung, your phone was going off. And I think I saw Jimin’s name flashed on the screen.”

“Jimin?” Yoongi thought of some reasons of why Jimin would call him, and a realization suddenly hit. “!” He then ran to the next room where he left his phone.

 

 

The room was empty when Yoongi entered. He grabbed his phone on the table and opened it.

3 missed calls

Well that’s weird. Yoongi was supposed to meet Jimin three hours ago, and he had forgot about it because of the sort-noticed interview for today.

Yoongi of-ing-course, had also forgot to tell Jimin about it. And he expected to have at least 50 missed calls by now. But three?

Yoongi pushed his thoughts aside and called Jimin’s contact.

 

“Hello?” Yoongi heard a soft voice from the other line. God, he loved that voice so much.

“Jimin.”

“Yes, Hyung?” Jimin replied softly.

Yoongi sighed. He felt so bad for Jimin. “I- I’m sorry I got another schedule and- and I forgot to tell you about it.”

There was a pregnant pause before Jimin answered.

“Ah I see.”

Yoongi sighed again. “I’m really really sorry, Jiminnie. I should have told you.” He sat himself down on the coach beside the table. “Uhm- where are you now? Are you still in the park? Have you been waiting for me? . I’m so sorry.”

There was another silence.

“That’s okay, Hyung.You’ve been busy. I understand.” Jimin’s voice was so soft and understanding, and Yoongi felt even worse now. Jimin was indeed too good for him.

“Jiminnie--” Yoongi called softly. He leaned his back on the armrest and closed his eyes. He pictured Jimin in his mind. A sad Jimin sitting alone on a park bench, being cold from the night breeze, yet waiting for Yoongi patiently. Oh boy, Yoongi was the worst boyfriend ever.

“Hm?” Jimin hummed in response.

“It’s getting dark now. Just go home, okay?”

“Yes, Hyung. Good luck with the interview.” Yoongi could feel that Jimin was smiling from the voice. And it made Yoongi smiled with the boy.

“Thank you. I’ll need that.” Yoongi opened his eyes and looked at the white ceiling above him. “It’s a live interview anyway.”

“Ah I see. I will- uhm- I will watch you from home then.” That’s exactly what Yoongi was trying to prompt by saying that the show was live. Thinking of Jimin watching him would be such a spirit boost for him to be honest. Jimin was so supportive. He had always been.

Yoongi was starting to wonder, did he really deserve Jimin? Because Jimin was all sweet and kind, and Yoongi was a jerk. “I love you.” He blurted out instead. “I love you a lot.”

“I love you too. So much.” Jimin sounded so helpless, and Yoongi blinked to prevent some tears from falling.

Yoongi closed his eyes with his free hand. “Okay then. Night, Jiminnie.”

“Night, Hyung.”

 

 

**

 

 

“Hyung?”

Yoongi was woken up by Namjoon’s voice. He blinked and tried to look at his surroundings. He was currently sitting on the couch beside the windowsill, in his dorm living room.

Why did he sleep here?

“Hyung?” Namjoon’s voice once again could be heard from before him. Yoongi turned to the voice and found Namjoon hovering above him. Hoseok was behind him.

Yoongi found his hands were still holding his phone on his chest, somehow rather tightly. He frowned. He turned his phone and opened the lock. He was rather shocked when he was greeted by Jimin’s pretty face.

Well, he must be fell asleep at some point because there was no more sound of the rain from the outside. Damn his neck felt so numb, he must be had just slept in the most awkward position.

“How do you feel now, Hyung?” Namjoon spoke again.

Yoongi closed his phone and turned to Namjoon who apparently was glancing at Yoongi’s phone too.

. He saw it, didn’t he?

“What do you mean?” Yoongi frowned.

“Well, this morning you said that you didn’t feeling well. So, how do you feel now? Feel better?” His friend answered calmly.

Yoongi knew what Namjoon was implying with his questions. He hadn’t told Namjoon about his encounter with Jimin, yet Yoongi was sure that his friend had sensed something.

Yoongi decided to not to lie to his friends because really, what more to lose? “Oh- yea- no. Not really.”

Namjoon looked at him concern. “What happened, Hyung?”

Yoongi sighed loudly before he answered. “I saw Jimin last night.”

 

 

**

 

 

Yoongi had been too busy. Everything went so fast, and he could hardly remember dates and days. Yoongi hardly had time to think of anything other than composing songs, practicing, and performing. Well, he surely had enough time to think of Jimin in almost every occasion though. Jimin was his muse and motivation after all.

Yoongi couldn’t help but felt guilty for abandoning Jimin for another two months now. The phone call he made for Jimin two months ago was the last time he talked to Jimin.

Other than his daily ‘good luck’-text every morning, Jimin had never been contacting him either. Knowing Jimin, he must be too scared to disturb Yoongi in his schedules.

Yoongi being on TV while Jimin watching him on TV, was becoming their regular date at this point.

Yoongi knew that it must be hard for his boyfriend to be in a relationship with him. Yoongi could hardly give a proper attention and affection for Jimin.

It . Really.

He knew that he was hurting Jimin, yet he couldn’t do anything about it. His schedules were way too hectic to begin with, and well, he and his band mates were still climbing the stairs of fame, so he really needed to work his out to be able to reach the top.

When he was thinking of Jimin, he couldn’t help but felt so damn guilty. Jimin didn’t deserve to be hurt. He only deserved happiness. But, what was Yoongi giving him right now?

Yoongi had made up his mind. He had thought about his relationship with Jimin and he knew that he couldn’t keep doing this to Jimin. Jimin deserved better. Jimin deserved a better relationship, with a proper date. Going out to the movies and walking hand in hand happily without caring to the world.

He really needed to stop hurting Jimin. So, he needed to stop this. Dammit. Yoongi’s heart clenched so hard thinking about that.

Yoongi was standing in the park where he always came to meet Jimin. He was in his hoodie and mask right now. Even though the park was visited mostly by some elders only, he still couldn’t risk anything. It had been a year since he debuted, and people could easily recognize him now.

He spotted Jimin who was walking in his direction slowly. Jimin was wearing stripped long-sleeved t-shirt and dark-blue jeans. He was adorable as ever. He just looked rather tired. . Maybe Jimin had been busy, yet he still made some time to come in such a short notice from Yoongi.

Jimin was approaching him and Yoongi felt his heart was beating faster. It’s been awhile. He missed his boyfriend (Well, almost not his boyfriend anymore). He missed hugging Jimin. But Jimin didn’t seem to feel the same since he was just sending a small smile when he was in front of Yoongi. Okay, maybe Yoongi was really a jerk and didn’t deserve a warm hug from his Jimin (Almost not his Jimin anymore, dammit!).

“Hi, Hyung.” Jimin smiled slightly, it didn’t reach his eyes. His eyes weren’t forming those beautiful crescents which Yoongi missed so much. Something was off.

Yoongi smiled back. Or more like, grimaced back, from behind his mask. He looked around and saw some teenagers were chatting happily. Damn. It’s indeed too risky to hug Jimin right now.

“Uhm- do you want to talk about something, Hyung?” Jimin asked him quietly. Crap. Jimin was aware that Yoongi had something to say.

“No-” Yoongi saw Jimin frowned. “Uhm- yes actually.” He corrected directly when he saw the look on Jimin’s face.

“What is it?” Jimin sighed softly and smiled widely. ing smiled widely.

Why was he smiling widely now? It was already so hard for Yoongi as it was.

“I- uhm-” Yoongi looked at the younger’s pretty eyes and couldn’t find his words. “Jiminnie- I-” He tried again.

“Just say it, Hyung. It’s okay.” Jimin still smiled, softly this time, tried to reassure him and it made Yoongi sighed in defeat because goddammit he really didn’t deserve the kind-hearted Park Jimin.

“I think- Uhm- I think we should break up.” Yoongi finally said it, and he didn’t feel any better. If anything, he felt even worse now.

Jimin’s smile was suddenly wiped off from his pretty face. And yes, now Yoongi felt so damn worse indeed.

Jimin didn’t say anything for a goddamn forever later. He only looked at Yoongi’s eyes with an unreadable expression. Yoongi wondered, since when Jimin could mask his emotion this well. He used to be an opened-book for Yoongi. Now, Yoongi was not sure that he knew anything about Jimin at all. And he knew it was his own fault.

Yoongi couldn’t stand the silence any longer. Jimin’s gaze was boring into his deepest soul and made him weaker. “I’m sorry- it’s just- that I-”

“I understand, Hyung.” Jimin cut his words.

Yoongi stared at the younger boy before him and raised his brows. He didn’t really know what he had expected, but surely not this. Jimin was a fighter, but why didn’t he fight for them anymore? His heart clenched harshly and he could feel his eyes started to sting. Well, it’s not like it’s Jimin’s fault though.

Yoongi still needed to explain, so Jimin at least wouldn’t hate him too much. “I’m sorry, Jiminnie. I don’t wanna hurt you any longer.” He sighed. “I’m loving you too much for that.” Saying the words out loud made everything being even harder to cope.

“Okay, Hyung. I- I understand.” Jimin pressed his lips in a thin line. “Can I- uhm- can I hug you, Hyung?” Jimin looked at him with sadness and a little- hope maybe?

Yoongi looked around and there were still some girls chatting happily not far from them. Yoongi could even hear what they’re talking about since they talked so loudly. One of them suddenly turned to Yoongi’s general direction while still joking with her friends. It’s too risky. .

“Let’s just-” Jimin’s voice made Yoongi turned to the boy in front of him again. “Let’s just shake hands, okay?”

Why was he too ing scared? Goddammit!

“O- okay.” His heart felt so ing hurt, he might die on the spot.

Yoongi reached Jimin’s stretched hand. And then squeezed it lightly. Jimin’s hands were the cutest hands in the world. They’re so small, so soft, and so so warm. It’s one of Yoongi’s favorite parts of Jimin. Yoongi wouldn’t be able to touch it again after this. This would be the last time Yoongi held this very very pretty hand of his Jim—

“Okay, cool.” Jimin suddenly pulled his hand from Yoongi. And he smiled slightly.

Yoongi felt a sudden cold from the loss of warmth from Jimin’s hand.

“I- uhm- I think I need to go Hyung.” Jimin looked at everywhere but Yoongi’s eyes.

Yoongi was so confused right now. It was his own decision. He needed to be focus on his carrier. He needed to achieve his dreams. He needed to stop hurting Jimin by dating an idol like him. But now, he started to question it again. Was it the best decision after all?

“Sure.” Yoongi still looked at Jimin’s eyes. Because he just really needed to look at those beautiful brown orbs for the last time.

“Good luck, Yoongi hyung.” Jimin finally looked back at Yoongi. “Bye.” The boy smiled warmly at him. So, so warmly.

Yoongi sighed. No, it’s not a bad decision. Because Yoongi had been thinking so hard before finally made up his decision. It’s really for the best.

Yoongi was pretty new in this idol-life and he needed to be acknowledged by the world before he revealed Jimin to them. And to be acknowledged and to be able to reach his high dreams, he needed to focus. He had been thinking too much about his guilty feeling towards Jimin lately. And it only made him weaker at this point. So yea, it was indeed a great decision.

Yoongi wouldn’t try to hold Jimin back from pursuing his own happiness. Yoongi didn’t want to tie Jimin in an instability and uncertainty. So that, he set the boy free. Well, at least for now.

He might be broke up with Jimin, but it wouldn’t be the end for them. Their bond was too strong to be ended just like that. And Yoongi knew that somehow Jimin would understand.

“See you Jimin.” Yoongi smiled back.

 

 

(After seeing Jimin laughing so happily with another man though, Yoongi had been starting to question it again. Was it the best decision after all?)

 

 

**

 

 

“Really? How’s he?” Hoseok replied instead of Namjoon now. The man widened his eyes.

“Did you guys talk?” Namjoon also asked.

Yoongi stared at his band mates for a while and then blinked. He didn’t really expect that his friends would sound this excited. “No. I only saw him. He didn’t see me though.” He shrugged.

“Well, so how’s he?” Hoseok still insisted.

“He’s-” Yoongi stared at the phone in his hands. And thought about Jimin’s beautiful smile. “I still love him.”

Namjoon smiled slightly, while Hoseok looked somehow relieved.

“Then you should do something, Hyung!” Hoseok exclaimed.

“Wait-” Namjoon frowned. “Do you think this is the time, Hyung? Are you ready now?” Namjoon sounded purely concern. “You know we don’t mind it, Hyung.”

Yoongi smiled slightly.

Namjoon and Hoseok knew well about Yoongi and Jimin. Yoongi told them not long after the break-up. He told them about his thoughts. Yoongi could clearly remember how Hoseok had looked at him skeptically and asked ‘So you broke-up with the love of your life partly to pursue your biggest dream. And then you’ll come back to him when you are able to make him happy, and you expect him to somehow still waiting for you when that time come? Aren’t you a little too confident, Hyung?’

Well thinking about it now Yoongi felt that indeed, he was too confident.

“I won’t do anything about this, guys. I saw him last night, but he was holding hands with another guy. And they looked good together.” Damn. It hurt to say it out loud apparently.

“What?!?” Namjoon and Hoseok replied simultaneously.

Yoongi shrugged.

“Well, he can be Jimin’s uhm- good friend, right?” Hoseok didn’t sound so sure himself.

Yoongi stared at his friends and sighed loudly.

“Do you still have his number?” Namjoon asked suddenly.

Yoongi frowned at the man before him. He didn’t know why Namjoon asking that. “Well no, I don’t. But, uhm- I do remember.” He did remember it by heart.

“Call him.” Namjoon then said without missing a beat.

“What? No!” Yoongi widened his eyes. “And I didn’t know whether he still use the number anyway.”

“Well, still. Try it! You can’t back out now, Hyung. You don’t have to back out now. We’re here now, Hyung. We’re no longer crawling, we’re flying now. Well, still not at the very top, but damn we’re reaching it. We’ve built an entire ARMY to protect us. I think we’re save, I think you’re save now. You’ve done all of this partly for Jimin. To make him proud, to be able to make him happy. To be able to reveal him to the world! And you’ve known Jimin since forever for God’s sake. I really believe that you know him so damn well. So, if you somehow knew that Jimin would wait for you. Then let’s find out whether Jimin knows you well too.” Namjoon spoke in one breath. Damn. He wasn’t a Rap Monster for nothing.

Both Yoongi and Hoseok raised their eye brows at Namjoon. They were taken aback by Namjoon’s sudden outburst.

“I’m sorry. I just-” Namjoon spoke again. “You’re different, hyung. Since Jimin hadn’t been in your life anymore, you’re different. It’s so subtle. I can’t explain it how, but I could feel it. I think you really need to keep him in your life.”

“O- okay.” Yoongi didn’t really know what to say now.

“Good. Now call him.”

 

 

 

“Hello?” It’s not Jimin’s sweet voice which Yoongi heard answering the phone. It’s a deep voice which Yoongi was sure belonged to a man about his age. The voice was raspy as if the man had just been sleeping when Yoongi called.

“I’m sorry. Is this Jimin’s number?” Yoongi didn’t know why he felt so damn nervous right now.

Yoongi glanced at Namjoon and Hoseok, and saw the two raised their eyebrows curiously. He then turned, back-facing his friends because honestly, the anticipation in their faces was making Yoongi felt even more nervous than necessary.

“Yea, it is. But I’m afraid he’s asleep right now.” There was something shifted from the other line, before the voice said again. “Who is this? I’ll tell Jiminnie you called.”

Jiminnie. Yoongi couldn’t help but notice the affection which was sounded from the pet name.

“It’s uhm- it’s-” Yoongi was not sure how he should answer to that question to a man who was possibly Jimin’s current lover. Should he say that he was Jimin’s ex-boyfriend? . Why did that sound so horrible now?

Yoongi cleared his throat. “It’s his old friend.”

“Well, do you have a name, old friend?” The voice sounded like mocking him, it’s unsettling.

Before he could answer the question, he could hear something shifted again from the other line. Then, he could hear a groan before a voice that he knew so well suddenly spoke up.

“Who’s that, Tae?”

. It’s Jimin’s voice. Jimin’s cute groaning voice.

“He said he’s your old friend.” The voice was kind of distance now. “Are you cheating on me, Jimin-ah?”

Cheating? . That man, Tae, was indeed Jimin’s lover.

“The are you talking about?” Yoongi could hear some groaning from the other line. “Give me the phone.”

Yoongi could suddenly hear more groaning. “Dammit! You two are too loud. I’m still ing tired! I need more sleep!” The voice was different. It was not Jimin’s. And it was not the other man’s, Tae, either. “Cuddle me Hyung!”

Cuddle?

“What— wait. Get off of me!” It was Jimin’s voice now. “Kookie! I need to answer this.”

Kookie? Another man? What?!

After several groans and shifts later, Yoongi could finally hear Jimin’s soft breath before his sweet voice came clear.

“Hellooo?”

Yoongi released the breath he didn’t know he was holding. “Ji- Jiminnie?” . Could he sound any more stupid?

Yoongi swore he could hear a soft gasp from the other line.

“Yoongi hyung?”

And it made Yoongi somehow relieved knowing Jimin could also remember him in an instant.

“Yea, it’s me.”

 

 

**

 

 

To say that Yoongi was anxious was understatement. Yoongi was so freaking terrified, he could feel himself fidgeting on the bench he sat on.

Yesterday, Yoongi had told Jimin to meet him in the park where they always met back then. Jimin sounded hesitant through the phone, but he had said ‘yes’ anyway. Yoongi didn’t really tell Jimin anything more after that, since he wanted to tell Jimin – anything that he wanted to tell – directly.

And now, anxiousness and excitement combined, had made him came thirty minutes earlier from the designed time. At least he got more time to think of what to say to Jimin now.

Yoongi was looking around the quite large park he was in. He hadn’t come to the place since his break-up with Jimin. Coming here now, apparently made the memory came in full force.

Dammit. He shouldn’t feel hurt anymore about that.

Yoongi sighed and looked at the other visitors in the park.

It seemed that the place still became elders’ favorite. There were only two teenagers he’d seen so far. And thankfully, they didn’t seem to notice him.

As usual, he was wearing a mask and a cap to prevent himself from being recognized. But well, actually it was not really his concern for now. He barely care of being recognized, since the only thought he had is about how he was finally properly meeting Jimin for the first time since forever.

Yoongi wondered, how Jimin would think about him now. Would Jimin still look at him with the heart-eyes he always had for Yoongi. Would Jimin still be the Jimin he knew back then. Would Jimin still—

“Hyung?”

That’s the sweet voice that Yoongi would always love to listen. Suddenly felt so close and so real. It’s overwhelming.

Yoongi turned and saw Jimin was standing beside the bench he was on.

And damn, Jimin was – he was still as pretty, or even prettier.

Jimin had pastel-pink hair just like the other night Yoongi saw him. His hair looked messy but styled. He wore black jeans, and a white T-shirt with a striped-oversized shirt outside it. Yoongi realized that Jimin had applied soft make-up on his pretty face. He wore thin eyeliner and pink lip balm. And damn, he was even wearing grey lens on his orbs. Three years ago, Yoongi was sure that Jimin barely knew what make-up was. But now, he seemed like he had been good friends with it.

“Yoongi hyung?”

. Yoongi knew that he had been staring, but well, that’s the love of his life who was standing before him. He was allowed to stare!

Yoongi then abruptly took off his mask. “Uhm- sorry- I was- uhm- Hi, Jiminie.” And that’s totally a lame greeting.

Jimin gave him the crescent-eyed smile that he had missed so much. And it surely melted his heart and he couldn’t help but return the smile.

Yoongi then gestured Jimin to sit down next to him and the younger complied easily. He looked so carefree and it made Yoongi wondered, was he the only one who had been so worked up about the meeting?

“How have you been, Hyung?” Jimin asked as soon as he was sitting down.

Despite the break down he got yesterday, his life didn’t feel that bad apparently. “Pretty good honestly. How about you?”

“Yea, me too. It’s really good even.” Jimin smiled at him. And he looked so serene.

It’s actually a relief to hear that Jimin’s been –

Wait –

It’s really good even.

Jimin’s life had been really good.

It’s been really good even without Yoongi.

WHAT??!

“Really?” Yoongi’s voice was weak, but it was enough for Jimin to hear.

Yoongi looked at the younger who was still smiling so serenely and dammit, he was so so beautiful, Yoongi really really wanted to embrace him.

“Yes, Hyung. I was one of the best dancers in my school, you know? And I teach dance in a famous dancing studio now. Uhm- that’s really good, right?” Jimin looked at him with those beautiful expectant eyes that Yoongi would always fall for.

“Wow- Yes it’s great. You always love to dance, and now you’re living with your dancing. That sounds great, really.” Yoongi paused, still looking at those expectant eyes, and then he sent a gentle smile for the younger. “And the best dancer? Damn you’re wonderful. I’m so proud of you, Jiminie.”

And those beautiful eyes were sparkling more, Yoongi was so drawn.

“Thank you, Hyung.” Jimin was blushing so hard, it’s so endearing. Yoongi really wanted to pinch those adorable pink cheeks.

There was a peaceful silence before Jimin spoke again. “Uhm Hyung- I-” He spoke reluctantly.

“Yes?” Yoongi asked almost too eagerly.

Because of Jimin’s expectant eyes. Because of Jimin’s serene smile for him.

Because Jimin’s eyes were still sparkling in Yoongi’s presence. Because Jimin was still blushing for him. It gave Yoongi some hope, that maybe. Maybe Jimin still—

“I watched everything, Hyung.” Jimin said. He looked at Yoongi somehow shyly.

Yoongi frowned. He wasn’t sure what Jimin was saying. The younger must knew it, because he then explained.

“I watched every show and every interview.” He started. “I watched your every concert in Seoul. I watched when you got your first trophy on music shows. I watched how your MVs broke the record for the most viewers in the first day. I watched how your album and songs reached the billboard chart for the first time. I watched how you got more and more fans every day. I watched when you got your first Daesang. I watched everything.”

Yoongi raised his brows, because he was taken aback. Apparently, Jimin watched everything. Jimin had been following his progress. Jimin cared. Jimin still cared!

“I’m so proud of you.” Jimin smiled so, so warmly. “You did it, Hyung.”

Yoongi sighed in relief. He sent a fond gaze at Jimin, and he got a warm smile in return.

“Yea, I did it.” Yoongi didn’t break the eye contact with the other. “But, there’s still something more that I need to reach before I’m completely happy, Jiminnie.”

Jimin’s look was still so expectant. “What is it, Hyung?” He kept looking at Yoongi in so much anticipation. It’s so endearing. He’s so ing endearing.

Yoongi shifted on the bench to face Jimin better, and the dancer did the same. Yoongi then took off his cap and ruffled his black hair a little. It would surely make him could be recognized even more easily – and really, he could even hear a gasp from a distance – but it didn’t concern him now.

The adorable expectant look before him that made him sure about it.

Jimin didn’t say anything. He only looked at Yoongi in anticipation. Yoongi couldn’t help but smile softly.

The rapper then raised his hand and touched Jimin’s pink cheek that looked so inviting. He caressed it gently and dang it, it felt so ing soft. It felt almost unreal.

Still caressing Jimin’s cheek, Yoongi leaned forward slowly. He glanced at Jimin’s plump lips and then whispered. “May I?”

Jimin only nodded in response.

Yoongi smiled before finally closed the distance between them. He closed his eyes when he felt Jimin’s lips were on his. Goddammit. Yoongi had missed this so, so badly. It felt really good to finally taste it again, the taste of coming home from a long exhausting day. It made him feel so content. He kissed Jimin gently and lovingly. He could feel Jimin’s hands holding onto his front jacket tightly. He could even hear a quiet moan coming from Jimin. That’s addicting.

The taste of kissing Jimin was so addicting. How he had made it this far without one was really a wonder.

Yoongi opened his eyes when Jimin was pulling away slowly. He then put his forehead on Jimin’s. The younger opened his eyes and chuckled widely and breathlessly. Yoongi loved that sound. He ruffled Jimin’s pink locks and laughed widely too. It was a great feeling.

“I still need to reveal you the world.” Yoongi whispered from their short distance. “Uhm I mean – that – that if you’d still take me as your boyfriend.”

Jimin pulled away only slightly. “I never stop waiting, you know?” He spoke quietly.

It apparently made him so warm inside. Jimin was indeed waiting for him. It meant, Jimin knew that Yoongi only loved him. Jimin knew that Yoongi would always love him.

Maybe being Yoongi’s boyfriend wouldn’t bring all happiness for Jimin, but Yoongi would always try his hardest to give all the happiness in the world for the younger. Maybe Yoongi still didn’t deserve Jimin, but he would try his hardest to make him being someone who Jimin deserved.

“Thank you for being patience.” Yoongi smiled and cupped Jimin’s pink cheeks.

Jimin leaned in his touch. “It’s a hard struggle. But I didn’t mind it a bit. It's worth it.” Jimin sent another soft smile. “Is it okay to reveal me now though?” He then asked worriedly.

Apparently, it was a useless question. The revelation had been happening for a while now. Yoongi had taken off his disguise. Yoongi had kissed Jimin – his boyfriend! Finally! – in a public park. Yoongi had heard some gasps and some shutters from a distance. Yoongi had been revealing Jimin without the younger realizing.

Really though, Yoongi was sure that Jimin didn’t realize it. Because Yoongi knew that Jimin would be so damn worried and maybe even fainted by now if he knew. Why he didn’t realize? Well, maybe Jimin had lost in Yoongi’s eyes, as he had been looking at Yoongi’s eyes since he sat down on the bench and he looked so drawn by them. And honestly, Yoongi didn’t mind it at all.

The rapper caressed Jimin’s soft cheeks gently, before he leaned and pecked Jimin’s lips softly.

“Don’t worry.” He whispered. “Because I love you, Jiminie.” He pecked Jimin’s lips once again. “I love you more than anything in this world.”

Jimin seemed taken aback, and his adorable cheeks turned even ‘pinker’. “Oh my God! Don’t do that!” Jimin chuckled and hit Yoongi’s chest weakly. “I love you too, Yoongi hyung. I love you so much.”

It was a relief that Yoongi could finally hear those words again. It was heart-warming.

It was a beautiful sight when his beautiful Jimin laughing so contently in his hold, and he could laugh back just as content.

It was the best feeling.

 

 

(“Wait- Jiminie?”

“Yes, Hyung?”

“Who are Tae and Kookie?”

“Don’t worry. You’ll meet them soon.”)

 

 

---

 

NETIZENBUZZ

[Article] BIGHIT confirms BTS SUGA is dating a male dance teacher named Park Jimin.

 

 

1. [+870, -23] Hul so it’s official. It’s true.....
2. [+510, -22] Wow, so the official statement is out....
3. [+311, -25] It means Bighit supported them. That’s good to know.
4. [+223, -28] Wake up BTS stupid fangirls
5. [+222, -20] Why do a lot of comments in the article sound like he’s some criminal? Suga is gay. So what? He hasn’t done anything wrong.
6. [+118, -12] I don’t care about the gay part but I’m scared in case they get hate. There are so many homophobes.
7. [+110, -11] I heard that countless international fans of BTS are standing up for them.
8. [+106, -14] I want to be happy for them. But, it still breaks my heart ㅠㅠ
9. [+89, -7] I looked up about Park Jimin. Apparently, he’s a very talented dancer and was the best dancer in his school. And he’s so handsome too.
10. [+75, -5] Honestly, they match well. Hope they’ll be happy...
11. [+60, -0] I hope that they’re not hated or harassed and hurt ㅠㅠ
12. [+59, -0] Wow, they’re so brave. I really hope this will not ruin their careers.
13. [+51, -0] It will not affect his music. Suga is still Suga. I will still be BTS fans.
14. [+25, -8] Stupid fangirls are funding their gay dates ㅋㅋㅋ
15. [+24, -0] I’m fine that my bias came out of the closet. There’s nothing wrong with it. I’m just scared of how people will treat him now ㅠㅠ

 

 

---

 

a/n:

Yesss.. You made it!! Thank you~ Please tell me what you think of it^^

(Oh anyway, I kinda took those comments from some different articles in netizenbuzz and edited them a little. Sorry.)