16th of October

After spending the day outside in the garden, I had dinner with my uncle and Lady Chou. They told me a great deal about the history of this place and the village nearby. My mind wandered back in time and perhaps for this reason, I had to visit the library in the evening. All the talk about historical events, places and people aroused my hunger for more stories. I wanted to find something to read that would take me far away, because the days here are long and sometimes I do not know what to do with myself.

The bookshelves in the library are quite high and therefore a ladder is needed if one wants a book that is not within reach otherwise. I was not looking for anything specific and as some of the books are very old and it excites me to just pull them out and look at the covers. I was occupied in this way on the left corner of the room, standing quite high on the ladder when I found a beautiful, illustrated fairytale collection with emerald covers. I leafed through several pages and decided to bring the book down with me. However, in my excitement, I lost balance on my way down the ladder and fell – for a brief moment I was certain that my end had come.

However, before my body reached the floor, a pair of arms caught me and laid me down gently, so gently, that I barely felt it. My scream died in my throat and I looked at the face above me, surrounded by a faint, dark grey light coming from windows on all sides.

"You ought to be more careful," Tzuyu said, but I must have lost my voice somewhere as I could not say anything in return. Even as her face was stern with worry, a soft glint in her eyes made me feel slightly out of breath. Or perhaps, it was only a by-product of my fall. Nevertheless, my attention was stolen by the nearness of our bodies - I was lying down on the carpet, with my upper body supported on my elbows, as Tzuyu crouched over me with her one hand around my shoulders, and the other on my hip. My breathing should have been calming down by then, but it only seemed to quicken. I longed for something I could not quite understand, so I only stared and wondered how she had managed to save me just in time.

Tzuyu stared back at me and gripped the fabric of my dress so tight that her knuckles turned white from effort. However, when my gaze moved to the curve of her lips, she drew away sharply and left me lying there.

"Here is your book," she said as she walked back to me, holding the reason to my sudden stumbling in her hand. She smiled and I flushed from embarrassment, thinking of how I had gotten myself in to the position I was in.

"Thank you... for saving me," I said, got up and took the book from her. I looked at the cover with great interest so that I would not have to look her in the eye. Now that my head was beginning to clear, I wondered how long Tzuyu had been in the room without me knowing. She must have been close to me to be able to catch me. Had she been watching me?

"How long have you been here?" I asked and hold the book close to my chest, hoping that it could cover the sound of my jumping heart. However, she only flashed me a smile and chuckled, turning towards the bookshelves again. She went near one and lifted her hand to glide it over the backs of the books. Then her hand came to a stop and she pulled a small book with black covers from the shelf. I watched curiously as she walked back to me and I forgot my earlier shyness.

"I am very fond of this one," she said and gave me the book. "I have read it several times."

The title was called The Moon Song, and if I understood it correctly, it is a gothic tale. I asked Tzuyu whether the book is very scary, but she told me that it is more metaphorical than anything. I always get a feeling when I talk to her that she is somehow avoiding direct answers, no matter how simple my questions are. It is strangely fascinating and not as infuriating as one might thought.

We sat in the library and talked about books for a long time. It is surprising how much Tzuyu has read considering how young she is. Every time I mentioned a certain novel, she always told me she had read it. I even thought that maybe she was deceiving me, but when I questioned her about the books she could always talk about them in great detail. I think she knew that I was testing her, as her eyes were smiling at me the whole time.

"I should not be here," she said after a while and looked at the clock on the wall. We both listened carefully to the sound of ticking, which was evident in the quiet part of the house.

"Why?" I asked and watched her face that was obscured by her long hair. For a reason unknown to me, she looked like a knight who has battled long and hard during many lifetimes. Perhaps, because she seems so mysterious to me, my mind must fill in the blanks with romantic stories and ideas.

"I should be resting,” she said and looked down on the space between us. I had not noticed earlier how close we were. As beautiful as the library is, the chairs in the room are altogether too uncomfortable, so we sat on the floor like girls much younger than us.

My left hand was resting by my side, as I had been using my hands while talking. Now when I looked down to where Tzuyu was looking, I could see that our hands were nearly touching. Slowly, Tzuyu moved her own hand and I watched while my heart hammered in my chest. It was a queer feeling, especially knowing that we had hold hands many times before - it seemed to be something that Tzuyu liked. Carefully her hand came nearer and it was like watching a slow lightning, wondering where it would strike.

When our hands were only a fraction away from each other, I extended my own hand so that our fingertips brushed. A bolt went through my body and the whole world could have been the spot where our fingers met. Tzuyu let her fingertips glide over the skin of my hand until she reached my wrist. I thought, she would grasp it and I held my breath as my whole hand tingled.

"I better go," Tzuyu said suddenly and rose from the floor. I had hardly lifted my gaze from my own hand when the girl was already striding across the room. As she went through the open door, she did not turn to look back and reveal her face, so that I could have guessed what was on her mind.

I sat in the library for a long time, wondering if I had done something wrong. The sky outside was completely dark when I finally got up and took the books with me.

Supper passed me by like a fleeting dream and I thought that everyone could see my hand, marked by Tzuyu’s touch that seemed to make my skin glow.

17th of October

News have arrived from villages that have turned the atmosphere rather bleak in this great house. In the middle of dinner, a servant came in carrying an urgent letter to my uncle. I watched his face as he read and with every passing line a shadow on his face grew darker. I did my best at eating small bites, but my curiosity was too grave and when he finally lifted his gaze from the paper, I was not even trying to eat any longer.

"The strange illness in the villages seems to be spreading," he said, while his eyes looked somewhere far away. "They have asked me to come and help the local officers. I must go as soon as possible."

"I will come with you," Lady Chou said with her melodious voice that carried a new, more serious tone.

I watched their silent conversation as they regarded each other carefully. I tried to make myself as small as I possibly could, as I felt I was intruding on something that was not for me to partake in.

"Very well," he said, after the Lady had won their silent battle of wills. "We will leave early tomorrow morning. It is vital that we make haste."

A stone fell over my heart. I had been at my uncle's for less than a week and already they would be leaving. Did that mean I would have to go back home? Would Tzuyu go with them? My mind was swarming with questions as my dinner grew colder.

"Dear niece," he addressed me, as if he had read my mind. "I will not ask you to go with us, but I hope you will stay here. This matter should not take longer than a few days and Tzuyu shall remain here with you. I hope her company will soothe you while we are gone."

"Thank you, uncle. That is more than I can ask for," I said and bowed gratefully. As soon as I knew that Tzuyu would stay here, my heart felt lighter. Yet, I would have felt happier if I had known what had come between us.

The rest of the day was a flurry of preparations as the servants went from one room to another, setting everything ready for the journey. My uncle told me that he would let most of the servants have a few days off, as most of them would not be needed here while they would be gone. Only the cook and two maids would stay with us, together with