She stared at the trees outside her office window. It was kind of sullen. With the sun not exactly shining out, but the sky not being clear either- covered by a thin sheet of clouds. It was so quiet, being alone in her supposed division's office when most of her colleagues had gone out to have their lunch.

She relished the silence, after a full day of running around and making calls and attending to meetings.

Yet she also, dreaded how the silence brought back thoughts she pushed back deep into her mind.

She was thirty. And yet, a lot of times, she felt she didn't know if she lived her life right. 

She hated ambiguity though for most people, that was her most outstanding trait. Of course, if asked why she often kept her distance before letting anybody closer, she'd say, "I like to observe. To know things, before I plunge in. I need certain things clear."

And though she was probably near borderline paranoid with the amount of caution she took, she always stumbled and made mistakes. She was still human, despite the pedestal her peers or family have placed her on. 

A human with a lot expected from.

Yet for all the ambiguity or the boxing of her identity as some "too deep and serious lady" by many of her friends, Lisa was also just a baby to the people that meant to her the most- her family. She was always someone that needed protection. Someone who tended to be too haphazard with handling her own things, as can be seen by anyone who took real notice of her desk. Piles of paper stacked almost everywhere. Pen scattered. Her wallet on top of some notes that were written hurriedly.

But still, she thoroughly disliked that at past half-fifty of her age, she still couldn't feel the so sure about where she'd landed herself.

She let out a puff of air, making a sound as her lips shook from the motion. And then another sigh.

"What I'd give for some coffee right now," she softly whined to no one in particular, not taking her eyes off the sky that slightly lit up as the clouds apparently continued to move. 

For her mother, who Lisa vowed to protect and stand by when their father had abandoned them when she just graduated her degree (he was never really there in their twenty plus years of being "family"