“There’s two things I need to tell you.”

Mijoo has herself perched on alcove window in one corner of their campus building, briefly looking up from newest volume of One Piece she’s been reading to her friend with curiosity. It’s a rare sight of Jisoo being so deeply serious. “Sure. Fire away.”

“First, I got selected for the student exchange program to London. I’ll be over there for the whole holiday!!” The stiff face from before instantly breaks into huge grin.

“For real?!” Mijoo springs off the seat, launching herself into Jisoo and they bear hugging each other. “Congrats girl! Bring me some cool souvenirs, and mind you, I don’t want keychains or fridge magnets, okay? And—” It’s not until a minute later she realizes that someone is standing behind Jisoo, inches shorter than both of the two, watching them awkwardly since the beginning as though waiting for her presence to get noticed. Mijoo relents her non-sense blabbering and quickly steps back.

“Oh I didn’t see you before. Hi.” She belatedly greets Jisoo’s girlfriend, giving a small half-hearted smile.

“And the second.. The second is actually kind of a request.” Jisoo shifts back to calm, humourless mode as she continues. “Actually Soojung will stay in Okcheon for winter break. But since now it turned out I can’t go with you two, may I ask you to accompany her during the trip? She’s never been there before, and I’m a bit worried considering she has no sense of direction.”

“Yah! I’m not that bad, I’m just…”

“Cannot tell apart left and right?” Jisoo finishes the unfinished sentence, laughing despite Soojung’s squeak of protest.

“You’re going to Okcheon? I thought you’re from… Where was that again.. Gwangju, isn’t it?” Glimpse of annoyed expression flashing across Mijoo’s face.

“True, but.. Actually my parents divorced long time ago, and since the beginning of this year my mother is.. Uh.. Building new relationship with someone else in my hometown. I kinda want to give her space. Getting out of her hair.. However this will be their first Christmas together. So I accepted the offer from my aunt who lives in Okcheon to spend this winter break. It’s been awhile I haven’t seen granny too.” Soojung explains it lightly, but the uneasiness is there. “It’s okay, we don’t need to meet continuously once I get there. I just think maybe I can take the train together with you?”

“I see.” Mijoo nods dejectedly, zipping her bag up and sling it over her shoulder. “Fine. I’ll inform you about the ticket and train schedule later when I reach home.”

———————  

Winter in Seoul this year has been exceptionally cold and bitter, and three of them head out of the building with hands tucked on respective’s coat pockets. Today the sun’s decided to go down earlier that it’s supposed to be, leaving the world dark beneath canopy of black and gold sky at barely 5 PM.

“Mijoo-yah.” Tall shadow looms from behind as Mijoo’s steps to come to a stop.

“I know you’re not really in good terms with Soojung, though I can’t really understand why because she’s a wonderful person, but please… Take care of her for me, okay?”

Few hearbeats pause. Then Mijoo finally turns around, face schooled into her usual cheerful smile, and says, “Yeah leave it to me, silly lovergirl.”

———————  

Attention to all the passengers of Korea Train Express bound for Daejeon, your train is approaching at platform 2. Please stand back from the edge of the platform…..

Lee Soojung hops onto one of the cars once the train halts completely, weaving through crowd of passengers which are just boarded like herself, down the narrow aisle until she arrives at her seat. It’s a reserved one in standard class, window seat facing forward just as her preference, the leg room is pretty spacious, everything seems super comfy… Until she looks up at the compartment placed way too high above her head. As she struggles to haul her huge rucksack up there, Soojung begins to regret bringing too many unnecessary souvenirs - and also for being so darn short.

Oh .

Soojung’s already 100% certain her head’s gonna be crushed when the bag unfortunately slipped from her hands and—

“Watch out!”

—caught by someone behind her, right before it ever hit her face.

“Be careful, midget.” Mijoo snorts, tossing Soojung’s and her own belongings to the compartment, and Soojung has no idea if it’s just a joke or that girl actually tries to pick fight. There’s always something she can never fathom with this Lee Mijoo afterall; while notoriously known as whimsical girl with extra cheery and hysterical attitude by everyone, her behaviour towards Soojung whenever they’re alone is just scathingly cold. Mean, even.

The strange thing is, Mijoo wasn’t like that before, when they first knew each other and Soojung hasn’t started seeing Seo Jisoo. That’s why her main hypothesis is Mijoo probably feels left out. However, the two used to be inseparable friends once before Soojung appeared between them during the beginning of their college days.

She’d once tried to talk with Jisoo about the assumption, but her younger girlfriend just laugh it off, saying that Soojung was overthinking things. Mijoo was the one who’d encouraged them to date at first, so there’s no way she hates the idea of them being together, Jisoo reasoned.

On the other brighter side, her cool, distant manner actually makes Mijoo a good company during the trip by Soojung’s standard. She talks only when necessary, looks out through the window most of the time but doesn’t comment on every single scenery, which means less distraction and headache for the older girl who’s determined to finish her paperback before they reach Okcheon.

(On the other very, very much brighter side, her side profile - perfect nose and long, smooth jawline - while nodding into slumber is something nice to glance at when Soojung’s eyes get tired from walls of text.)

———————  

KTX ride from Seoul to Daejeon took about an hour and half, and from there they had to take another train to reach downtown of Okcheon. It’s a little past 8 PM when the two arrive safely to their destination at last.

“Anyone coming to fetch you?” Mijoo asks as they pass through the ticket gate.

“Yes, my aunt should be…” The smaller girl trails off, eyes land on a woman in her 40s, eagerly waving hands towards their general direction while approaching with half-running steps. She grins so wide even from quite a distance they can see set of white teeth. “Well, it’s her there.”

“Soojungie, my dear, I miss you very much! You really look like your daddy now! And didn’t grow up much since last time I saw you ten years ago, eh?”

“I grew up well auntie you surely didn’t remember our last meeting clearly.” Soojung smiles while denying, but her glare is dangerous at Mijoo who’s now making strange coughing sound to mask her snicker.

“Ooh isn’t this the other Lee’s daughter?” Soojung’s aunt exclaims, now realizing the taller girl’s presence. “I know your parents! Loyal customers of our shop for over a decade..” She keeps elaborating while Mijoo just nods awkwardly.

“Could it be… Are you two together?”

“NO!” They can’t decide whose voice - Soojung’s or Mijoo’s - is the louder one, but the old lady chuckles nonetheless.

“Well, too bad then.” She tuts, tone still teasing. “Anyway, about time for us to leave, it's really cold now after the sun set. Mijoo-ssi, do you need a ride? I can drop you on your place.” She asks.

“Nah, I’m fine. My parents should be here soon too.” Mijoo declines, shaking her head politely.

“See you later then.” The short girl waves her hand.

“Yeah see you later on our way back to Seoul.”

If only Mijoo doesn’t turn her gaze away, she would definitely catch the way Soojung frowns a little disappointedly at her cold answer.

———————  

“Welco— Oh it’s just Mijoo unnie.”

“Yah how dare you it’s just Mijoo unnie me, lil’ punk!” Long arm reaches over the cashier counter, playfully slapping Jiho’s head. 

“Your job seems nice, by the way!” And by nice, Mijoo means all those snacks from various brands, flavors, and sizes lining up along an aisle near the counter. She spots her favourite chocolate bar, then grabbing one - of in’ course - without permission.

“Hey, you should pay for that first!” Ignoring Jiho’s complain, Mijoo’s already taking big bites.

“Pay it for me, okay? You’re making money here, I’m just college student living in poverty.” She winks. Jiho gapes incredulously.

“How long would you be staying here?”

“Until my winter break ends. Means around February.” Mijoo replies, now aiming for instant popcorn.

“That’s great.” Means two miserable months for me, Jiho grumbles internally.

“Too bad you didn’t bring along that hot unnie slash best friend of yours again.”

“You nuts, she’s not available for you to hit on, y'know!” Mijoo laughs, taking out a pack from box of Butter Lovers and handing it to Jiho.

“Tch. It’s okay, this year you came home with another girl, didn’t you?” Jiho throws the flat bag into microwave.

“…. How did you know?”

“I have eyes and ears everywhere in this town.” The younger girl smirks.

“Fabulous. You’re some sort of thug leader now?” Mijoo snorts. They wait and listen to the corn kernels popping inside the microwave quietly, until Mijoo continues, “It seems your eyes and ears missed a thing and I’m so sorry to be the one to inform you, she’s taken as well. So whatever crazy plan you’ve been thinking of, just don’t. Or I will drop-kick your myself.”

“Whaaatt? Bummer!” Jiho frowns exaggeratedly. “Oh well.. If that’s the case then I’m definitely not going to mess up with your lady.”

“She’s not mine.” Mijoo shakes her head, suddenly feeling her face heated slightly. “Hey, what about repent from your sin of being womanizer and try settle down for once?”

“Says someone with list of victims longer than mine. Don’t try to change the topic, unnie.”

“But really, in all of seriousness, there’s few good girls that would suit you well. For example, that someone who’s been close with you since forever..”

“Blah blah blah…” Jiho turns back to the microwave, feigning ignorance. Three minutes have passed and their popcorn is ready.

“You’re truly a brat.”

“Same to you.”

“By the way, she’s your favourite Jisoo unnie’s girlfriend.. That girl who came with me to this town.” Even Mijoo herself doesn’t quite know why she feels the urge to fill Jiho in on that information. 

“Is that so?” They begin to pop the warm popcorns into their mouths. “Hm. I can see those two are cute together.”

“Though I would not be opposed to the idea of she’s being your gf.” Jiho adds, doesn’t even bother to chew first before talks.

Mijoo makes a face at her. “Please, my type is girl who looks like SNSD’s Seohyun or Apink’s Chorong or…”

“Whateveeer~” Jiho says in mocking sing-song tone. “Next year bring someone cool and available for me!”

“In your dream, kid.” No longer interested with the popcorn, Mijoo steps into another aisle, looking for another prey to devour.

“Where are you going? Yah don’t eat things as you please Imma call security for shopliftings! YAH!”

———————   

Okcheon is a beautiful place, with vast open lands, and whenever direction you turn at, there’s only rolling hills seen, bordering every edge of the town. No pollution, no packed bustling city life - but also no movie theatres, no decent shopping mall, basically not much entertainment. So after Christmas and all of the euphoria it brings passed, Soojung spends time just helping her aunt in their family’s liquor store, which is extremely busy now with New Year right around the corner.

There’s sound of door being pulled open followed by cheerful I’m home!, Soojung stands up from her seat immediately. Her uncle and aunt’s only daughter - who’s became Soojung’s favourite cousin after a week - is finally back from college.

“Welcome back, Seunghee!”

“Gaah I hate going to school in holiday!” Seunghee’s face scrunches up cutely. Their family cat, a four year old, fat, seal point Siamese runs up to her feet, and she hoist it for a hug. “Gotta withdraw from some of club activities and next year I can stay home playing with Cookie all day throughout winter break.”

Cookie meows, as though in agreement. The adorable scene of her cousin and the cat elicits an amused smile from Soojung. “What were you doing today?”

“Oh, practice. With the choir club, there’s annual festival held by the beginning of new semester and we will perform.” Seunghee replies dramatically, then echoes the same question. “What were you doing today, unnie?”

“Work? What else would I be doing..” Soojung laughs, little sarcasm in it. “There’s this Japanese girl working for a jokbal place nearby came earlier to order few kinds of liquor.”

“Booooring~ Hey, let’s go hang out! My friends are fun they’ll love to see you!”

“We got lots to do here, kiddo..” Besides, Seunghee’s friends means bunch of teenagers, it would be awkward for her to hang out around them.

“Nah, Seunghee is right. You’re here for holiday, to have fun.” Her uncle suddenly butts into the conversation. “Just go with her, we got everything under control here.”

Soojung looks like she’s about to refuse again, but the fifty years old man’s already shooing them away, making dismissive hand gesture. So she relents and goes with Seunghee to change their clothes.

———————   

When they finally reached the appointed place to meet with Seunghee’s friends - an ice cream shop, popular with local youngsters as after-school hangout because it’s the only stylish place in Okcheon and not for the cold desserts they serve - the last person Soojung’s ever expected to see sitting among the group of girls is Lee Mijoo.

“Uh. Hello again..” Pitch of Soojung’s voice ascends slightly at the end, more similar to a child asking permission from their mommy to be in one place instead of an act to get her presence acknowledged.

“What are you doing here?” Mijoo demands.

“She’s my cousin!” Seunghee answers instead of Soojung, obviously failed at grasping the tension building between the two older girls. “Wait.. You two knew each other already?”

“We’re attending same college in Seoul.”

“I’m Jiho. Just like Seunghee to you, I am cousins with Mijoo unnie.” Jiho cuts in smoothly, grinning from ear to ear and holding out her hand to Soojung for handshake. “Now let me introduce our friends! The eldest Choi Hyojung, used to be Mijoo’s classmate since elementary school.” She points at smallest girl between the three, then to the other wearing school uniform. “And our maknae, Choi Yewon - call her Arin, by the way - is Hyojung’s sister.”

“I see.” Inside Soojung’s head is an imaginary hierarchy table; Seunghee’s college classmate a.k.a Jiho is Mijoo’s cousin and Mijoo has friends from middle school named Hyojung, who has a younger sister that is Arin. In conclusion, it’s true this world is a very small place.

“What are you guys up to?” Seunghee asks, snatching one of the ice cream cake on their table.

“Planning for our own New Year party in Hyojung and Arin’s mansion! We’re heading downtown to buy sparklers after this!”

“You two should come with us! The more the merrier!” Hyojung exclaims, clapping both Soojung and Seunghee on their backs in friendly manner.

“Sounds great! You’re coming as well, right? Soojung unnie?”

“Uh. Yeah, I’m cool with anything.” It’s not like she has other better things to do anyway.

“I’m going home.” Suddenly Mijoo interrupts. Everyone stare, flabbergasted, as she shrugs her coat on and grabs her bag.

“Wait!” Jiho stands up, hands banging on the table rather loudly. “What’s wrong with you are you having PMS or something?! It was your idea!”

“Don’t feel like going anymore. I’m tired, I’ll take short nap at home. See ya later.” Mijoo waves her hand to noby in particular before leaving.

———————   

The truth is, Mijoo is actually tired and in dire need of sleep. The peaceful one, free from ed dreams about certain girl with cute mole under lips and even cuter dimples shown while smiling at her. 

Except, she’s been lying down on her extra comfy bed for about two hours or so now, yet her mind never let her pass out at all, until Mijoo hears someone’s knocking at the door.

“Crap.”

When Lee Soojung walks into her room, Mijoo almost thought she’s dreaming again. But no, her dream usually doesn’t involve Jiho shouting from behind the wall, “Have a mature conversation like adults you two are supposed to be! And we don’t want to welcome the new year with some bloodshed so please don’t fight!”

Her back leans against closed door, as though blocking the only way for Mijoo to slide her way out of this like she always did. “I’m sorry for disturbing, but I think we need to sit down and have a decent conversation.” Soojung never really likes to talk. But there’s too many questions that’s been lingering for way too long, and tonight, she’s determined to get it all answered.

“There’s nothing to talk about, and I kinda not want to see you now so please, get out.” Mijoo doesn’t speak in harsh voice, but the venom is there, laced between every word.

“What is this with you?! I’ve been trying to make friendship works between us but I just can’t understand you anymore! What did I ever do wrong that makes you hate me so much?!” Two years. Two years full of questions and anxiety finally materialize into this blowup.

But Mijoo, however, doesn’t seem affected by Soojung’s displeasure. “You didn’t do anything. Can we drop this already?”

“Hey, do you have feelings for Jisoo?” Soojung blurts. “It’s because of it, am I wrong?! You’re like this to me because you love—”

“Me and Jisoo have been knowing each other since I moved to Seoul. Means during our first year in high school.” Mijoo interjects, quick but calm, and looking slightly wistful. She finally gets up, sitting in her study desk. Soojung’s brows furrow as she begins story-telling. “People always say that we have too many things in common. Same interests, similar taste.. We play basketball together, love sports and outdoor so much. We often bought clothes or shoes in pair, ordered same food, watched same movies and listened to same music. Everything.”

“It was fun in the beginning. Felt like having twin sister I’d always been wanted.” A thin, broken smile forms. “Until one day we fall in love with same person, one same person, which has no duplicate anywhere else in this world and cannot be multiplied for each of us…”

Soojung stares hard at her.

Oh.

That’s when Soojung finally understands. Mijoo wasn’t upset or jealous because she likes Jisoo all this time.

The one Mijoo loves, is Lee Soojung.

Her.

“Since when?”

“Table eight. Hot latte with no sugar. Extra skimmed milk. The incident.” Their first meet.

It seems Soojung also remembers those memories, because soon her lips curve into the slightest fond smile. “You spilled the whole tall cup into my newly bought Detective Club. Hadn’t read even one page of it.”

“I almost got fired. They cut my wage quite a lot back then. Happy now?”

Soojung ignores the sarcasm. “Why didn’t you say anything?”

“About how I didn’t have enough money to last a month because of that incident?”

“You got jokes now, huh?” Soojung scoffs. She takes a little step forward. When Mijoo doesn’t move away from her spot, she takes one another. Until their distance is close enough to see each other’s face clearly under dim light of the room. Or more precisely, close enough for Soojung to see crown of the other girl’s head, because Mijoo’s still obstinately looking down like there’s something very enticing on the parquet floor.

“You.. You said all those good things. Egged me on to go out with her. Why?”

“Okay, try to put yourself in my shoes. Imagine you have this bestest friend and she comes to you for an advice regarding ridiculous case of innocent love, hey I have this massive crush on that regular who comes by our coffee shop every morning, would you just go oh wow me too buddy! So I suggest you back off and let make move on her? Unlike some popular belief, I’m not that immoral.”

Silence falls. Then Mijoo dares herself glancing over, eyes landing at the other girl’s.

Soojung does good at holding in whatever she’s actually been feeling - as good as Mijoo pretends to never care about Soojung - yet if one pays close attention, her expression and gestures are subtle giveaway. Only this time, Soojung seems to be unreadable; is that an uncertainty flickering on those dark brown orbs? Or…. Thrill?

Nah, that cannot be it.

“Soojung, there’s no hidden agenda, no wishful thinking at all here. I’m just answering your question, not giving you something to answer. So please, don’t mull over this, okay?”

In fact, Soojung doesn’t think anything besides how nice the sound of her name coming from Mijoo’s lips.

———————   

It’s one thing to have little secret crush on your lover’s best friend, and quite another to realize that friend reciprocrates your feeling. And if this were in Seoul, Soojung would definitely be too busy with preparation for her final project and internship to let herself mull over it too much. 

But they are on a small town, in the middle of nowhere. Far away from campus and Seo Jisoo. Far away from reality. Nobody knows about who they are or their lives in details, besides probably Mijoo’s parents, and even Soojung doubts the girl actually tells stories about her love life from A to Z to her mom.

No one will know.

It must be satan. Soojung shakes her head adamantly.

But satan doesn’t give up easily, of course. He comes back bringing short movie of their first meeting to be played inside her head; a very jittery waitress kept rambling apologies with head hanging low, probably hundred times before Soojung managed to assure her that everything was fine and she wasn’t gonna be punished by death sentence. It was only later when the said waitress had scraped together enough courage to lift her head, Soojung got a chance to have good look at her feature.

She was so pretty then.

More scenes roll in. Antithesis of every disappointed customer who had bad experience with a place, Soojung visited the coffee shop regularly. And she did just to get a glimpse of Lee Mijoo. Becoming guinea pig for the barista-wannabe’s coffee experiment, hearing her horribly noisy laughter between small stories the two exchanged; they grew familiar with each other little by little, to the point where Soojung had slight thought that maybe, her hopeless crush wasn’t that unattainable afterall.

Until one day, Jisoo came into the picture, then Mijoo vanished faster than she’d made way into Soojung’s life.

She is still as beautiful now. 

Still crafts an awful latte with unbalanced amount of milk - now that she thinks about it, maybe Mijoo got that habit because of her preference on coffee. Her laughter is still as hideous as before, it still faintly reverberates in the recess of Soojung’s mind all the time.

No one will know.

Soojung feels like the absolute worst of the worst, taking her phone then texting Jiho where is the new year countdown party?

———————  

But Mijoo doesn’t show up on the said party, so off Soojung goes to find her. There are three places their friends suggested, she decides to stop by the nearest one first.

Infinite is the only modern bar in Okcheon, and tonight, they’re holding what is probably the most abysmal New Year party Soojung has even seen in her entire life. She struggles moving as fast as she can, squeezing through throng of people from young lads to ahjussis ready to get wasted on the first day of 2017, tiptoe-ing and head turning left and right in search for scarce glimpse of brunette head. After wasting almost twenty minutes and getting all over her clothes reeked with nasty combination of tobacco and alcohol, Soojung figures it out that the girl she’s been looking for definitely isn’t in this place.

The second and third places are, thankfully, located in same site and aren’t as loathsome as the previous horrible bar; Okcheon County Primary School. Once Soojung’s certain nobody, especially security, is present in the nearby to see her, she swiftly climbs over the school’s gate, landing succesfully with two feet onto the ground then proceeding to her destination in flash speed. (Even Soojung herself is impressed by such burglary skills she posseses.)

The recently renovated basketball court is empty - even without entering Soojung can already guess, because looking from row of huge windows, the whole building is almost pitch black. Still, she creaks the door open and takes a few moments to adjust her vision before able to peek around. Small smile appears as she vividly imagines Mijoo in the basketball uniform, ponytail bouncing as the tall girl dribbling typical orange rubber ball around this very room. Soojung mentally makes a self-reminder for her to make a visit next time Jisoo and Mijoo play at their university in Seoul.

Satisfied, she leaves and resumes her mission. Mijoo’s ex-school is pretty big, but despite her abominable sense of direction Soojung navigates through the area without much problem. Rooftop Hyojung had told about located in the main building, thus she goes into biggest building next to the court, carefully walking past dark entrance hall, climbing up linoleum stairs with her phone as torchlight, until she reaches the last floor and finds a small metal door.

Heart thumping madly, small hand twists the rusty knob. And finally, behind the door, is a silhouetted figure of Lee Mijoo, sitting across the floor with eyes fixated at the clear night sky.

“New Year’s eve in here is nowhere near spectacular, but we have small fireworks display since few years ago.” Mijoo welcomes her flatly. “You just arrived at the best spot to see them. But don’t tell anyone else, I don’t want to share this view with more people next year.” 

“What do you want anyway? I saw you climbing the gate like a monkey.”

“Go out with me.” is Soojung’s answer. Without hesitation. And Mijoo almost chokes on air. “Just until we go back to Seoul, forget about our status or everything happened in the past.”

“But, I… We—”

“We do it secretly.” Soojung cuts Mijoo’s stuttering words, half shouting against the blare of fireworks which just went off a second ago, signaling the year has changed. 

“Jisoo doesn’t need to know anything about this. No one will know.”

This is hella insane. Mijoo tries to think about Jisoo, their long time friendship, everything that is at stake - but she also can’t help but thinking about hundred midnights she’s spent trying to get Lee Soojung off her mind. And, oh heaven can’t help her, the hands that are now catching her face before she could move away, their lips smashed against each other, Soojung kissing her without reservations…

It all feels wrongly right.

So when the next firework flies up the sky with another piercing blasting sound and explode into multicoloured sparks right above their heads, Mijoo kisses Soojung back harder.

———————  

They set few rules.

What happens here, stays here. They are absolutely prohibited to share stories about their relationship to anyone in Seoul, even to the closest, most-trusted bffs. Uploading pictures or videos together on any SNS accounts is out of question.

Topics about Jisoo aren’t really restricted, but they shall avoid talking about her too much, and comparing the two relationships is big no-no. Comparing two people is emotionally dangerous trap, wise words Soojung got from her grandma.

Time is gold. They only have less than two months and want to make the most out of it. So first week into the relationship, Mijoo begins spending as much of her time as possible to be with Soojung by working unofficially in the liquor store - and it’s weird as hell.

“This is our Mijoo unnie. The sentences ‘working in holiday’ and 'Mijoo unnie’ cannot appear in same paragraphs. Something’s definitely not right!” Arin is utterly confused. Jiho smiles evilly as though she understands about this something going on. Hyojung, the other one with keen eyes, shakes her head, thinking you kids aren’t supposed to know. And Seunghee actually doesn’t care, she’s just angry that her beloved Lee Soojung doesn’t baby her all the time anymore.

Turns out, making transition from two awkward friends who only talk for approximately two minutes everyday to closet lovers isn’t all that hard for them. As the shyer of the two, Soojung with no doubt moves a little slowly in the start. But days go by and she’s no longer holding back on showing her affectionate side; entwined little fingers turns into looped together arms, stealing glances turns into stealing little kisses amidst doing chores around the shop when nobody else sees them.

“Are you sure you’re alright?” Soojung watches the taller girl, veins pop out along her forearms as she struggles carrying a wooden box containing bottles of wine from storage room.

“I… Am… Ugh!” Mijoo gives up, letting out heavy groan at the same time she let go the wooden box. “Not alright.” She doubles over, catching her breath.

Soojung chuckles, gently the exhausted girl’s back. “Leave it to me. You can carry something lighter.”

“Where did you get all that strength, I wonder..” Mijoo deadpans. Distance from their storage in backyard to the shop is around 20ft, they barely walked half of it yet all of her arms muscles are terribly aching and both palms shaking. “Hey.. Will you turn green and gigantic when angry?”

“Dunno. Don’t try, anyway. You’re gonna be the first one I topple over when I’m green and giant.”

Mijoo grins. Apparently the only words that went through her mind are Soojung, on top of her.

(And green. Green isn’t so bad. Green can be the new y.)

———————  

Firstly, there’s sound of someone getting smacked. Followed by shrieks and shrill laughs. Seunghee’s father wonders what’s going on in the backyard and when will the two girls come back with wines their customer requested.

———————  

When they have downtime, and feel like being domestic, Mijoo takes Soojung and barges into small flat Jiho’s been renting for herself, fully taking advantage of the young girl’s long- work hours which keep the whole place empty until evening. They play games (Jiho freaks out finding the one month worth of Super Mario Bros save data on her Wii has been overridden accidentally by them), try out some simple cooking, watch movies on Netflix, or simply enjoy each other’s company in comfortable silence.

“I have question.”

“Mhm?” Soojung hums distractedly, not looking away from the TV screen, until Mijoo reaches over and presses pause button at the Wii controller on her hand.

“What kind of person is…” Your soon-to-be new father? Your mother’s new guy? Mijoo isn’t sure as to how good or bad Soojung’s relationship with her family. She then decides to go with something safer. “I mean.. Can you tell me a little about your family in Gwangju?”

But Soojung understands. “He’s divorced. Ordinary guy, working nine to five in trading company, has daughter who’s most likely will be another older sister for me. He is nice. Maybe. I don’t know.” She tries to resume the game again, only for her girlfriend to takes the controller and puts it completely away from her reach. “At least I know mom is happy.”

“Don’t you want to know more about him?”

“Want it or not, I have to, Joo. It’s just.. Not now. I’ve never been good with strangers, give me some time to get ready.”

“Need some tips from pro?” Mijoo leans closer, eyebrows raised. “First of all, you must stop thinking of them as strangers. Second, the more you prolong things, it will become harder, y'know?”

“Oh I never knew you’re pro in approaching anything other than hot girls in our campus?”

“I didn’t approach every single of them. Chicks threw themselves at me.” She tilts Soojung’s chin up, staring deeply at her eyes. “Third, don’t try to run as soon as you find yourself out of your comfort zone.”

“Fine, fine. I’ll call them to… Saying belated happy new year?” Yet Soojung pushes away the cellphone Mijoo’s shoving at her direction very quickly. “After we finish this stage.” She nudges at the game console in front of them. Her girlfriend doesn’t look convinced. “Or do something else.” Fingertips linger at the hem of Mijoo’s sweater.

They choose something else.

(Hours later, Jiho comes home and freaks out again because 1. all of her Zelda save data has gone, and 2. the perpetrators are sound asleep on the guest room, leaving both the television and Nintendo Wii still on.)

———————  

Since Soojung’s status is just an unknown visitor, most of the time they can go on dates freely around the whole town. More problematic thing is, Okcheon doesn’t have many places designed specifically for couples to have peaceful, romantic date - not that they are much of a romantic, but nobody would love to hang out with their significant other in family restaurant or noisy public park, sipping on cheap soda with elder people staring and kids running around and occasionally bump at them.

Thus, they have to be more creative on selecting a date spot.

“Have you heard about Hyangsu bike road? We’ll do the shortest trail today!” Mijoo announces her 'creative’ plan, looking so eager with complete cycling gears from head to toe. Right beside her is a mountain bicycle she’d stole from Hyojung. “Not many people go cycling during this kind of weather, so we can be alone for the whole time! Plus, the view around here is great, I guarantee! Yay?”

“Yes, but…” Soojung’s eyes narrow, bad feeling coming on. “Why is there only one bike here?”

“Because I can’t ride.” Mijoo tells her, patting the additional seat of their bicycle. “You’re the pilot today, come on!”

“….. What the hell?”

Most of Hyangsu trails are well-maintained and fairly easy even in winter season. The one they’re going on right now is expected to be finished in two and half hours and has seven stops - so far they’ve passed the first four with Soojung constantly cursing at Mijoo along the entire way, threatening her keep moving around recklessly and I will drop your off here! while the latter just laugh obnoxiously.

“There’s place with excellent scenery where we can sit down and get some rest on the next stop! C'mon!” Mijoo claps the smaller girl on the shoulders, prompting her to go faster.

Despite cold wind beating hard against her back, beads of sweat still form on Soojung’s temple, dripping down to her cheek and neck as they’re reaching the rest area. She shivers slightly, parking their bicycle then following Mijoo to a roofed bench, facing scenic view of lake and vast area of tall pines and meadows. Fresh snow from last night which haven’t been thawed discolours everything into clean white, and Mijoo was right, it is indeed a great landscape to see.

“Say cheese!” Sound of shutter click, and Soojung, still pants irregularly, lets out noise of surprise.

“What are you doing?!”

“Sorry, just have to capture this moment since finally one of my wish is fulfilled now. I think it’s fine as long as we don’t appear too close together in a frame? I’ll only upload the ones of you without me.”

“Excuse me.” Soojung’s brows furrow, both hands on her waist. “Making me go for over seven miles bicycle ride with heavy, useless load in the back is on your wish list?”

“Not particularly you actually. It’s just— Ah this is embarrassing. Long time ago I listed few things I want to do or places I want to go when I find someone, the love of my life, that’s how I wrote it.. That someone just happened to be you.” Mijoo flashes shy grin. “Friggin’ cringey, yes. But oh well, y'know how teenage girls are! And seriously, Okcheon have lots of beautiful places you wouldn’t regret going to each of them.” She pats the space beside her with one hand, signaling Soojung to sit down, and another free hand grabbing two bottles of water from her bag.

Once in a blue moon, Lee Soojung is a petulant child who holds grudge. So she chooses Mijoo’s lap to plop herself down instead of the actual seat. “Mmhm. What else you have on that list? Because if there’s something involving extreme cliff diving or rock climbing or anything that require me splitting my bones, I’m backing out from being the love of your life now.” She snatches a bottle water offered to her and drinks quickly.

“Don’t worry, there’s no such thing. The only one left that’s involving high place is watching sunrise at the peak of Doonjoo-bong, my favourite sunrise. Hey, that mountain isn’t even considered as high!”

“Okay you’re definitely a perfect epitome of cringey.” Soojung scrunches her nose, faking a disgusted expression. “Is there anything else?”

“Manage a shop together. I already crossed that off the list, because those times when we worked in the liquor store counted, so yay!”

“You…”

…are so cute.

“Are so stupid.” Soojung smiles, shaking her head. More at herself than at the girl pouting in front of her.

Mijoo takes more decent photos later, and lastly, a four-frames selca with them getting closer in each frame - from standing side by side pose at first, to kissing soundly in the fourth.

The rules are crumbling. None of them care.

———————  

“What made you decide to give up on me and go out with Jisoo?”

They are on their way home, and this time, Mijoo actually behaves. She sits still in the back seat with hands around Soojung’s waist and head resting on Soojung’s sloppy shoulder, comfortably pressed against plush fabric of winter jacket the older girl’s wearing and her fruity-scented, smooth dark hair Mijoo always admires.

“Why?”

“I’m just asking.” And it’s true, the question’s just slipped out, she just has that tendency to inquire something randomly.

“Well. Believe it or not, Jisoo is the first person to ever ask me out. The fact that she didn’t stop even when I gave no respond, everything she’d done for me, all of them were… Intriguing. She seemed nice, you said she’s nice. So why not?”

“So it’s because you were curious.”

“That’s one way to put it, I guess.” Soojung hums, nodding lightly.

“Are you with me because of curiosity as well? Like, how does it feel to be with this gorgeous Mijoo…”

“Hell no. Even from the very beginning I’d already knew it you’re some pain-in-the- jerk who would drive me nuts with all those idiocy of yours..” There’s roaring laughter, then Soojung resumes. “And would make me fall so hard in love.”

“Wow. You got flirting skill now?” . Flirting is her forte, she’s not supposed to feel this foolish, highschool girl-ish, thumping sensation in her heart.

Soojung shrugs, one hand slips into Mijoo’s, giving it light squeeze. “At least I can assure you the falling part isn’t lie.”

———————  

It’s barely seven in the morning, she hears sound of someone yawning and stirring on the bed, and Soojung - in all her glory - freezes from her activity of rummaging through a closet.

“An exhibitionist, you are, huh?” Mijoo’s smile is full of mischief.

“You ing ripped my underwear last night, you jerk, so shut up.” Soojung grumbles, bright red to the tips of her ears as she feels pair of eyes blatantly scanning every inch of her frame in the half dark room. “And maybe stop ogling too.”

The younger girl laughs. “I’ll go find something fits your size, surely Hyojung has few clothes left in here..” She gets up, dragging herself towards Soojung, encircling her arms around the small shoulders. “But after this.”

There’s creaking sound when the two jump back into the bed, whispering each other’s name between whimpers.

———————  

“You know what, the spare room you’ve been using isn’t really that soundproof. And just fyi, I’m not deaf.” Mijoo knows she’s ed up when her cousin stares at her, hands crossed, thin smile and sharp eyes scrutinizing her soul.

“What do you want to do? Telling the whole town that I am a low human being?” The older girl says in defeated tone, deciding that throwing back fire at Jiho wouldn’t do any good.

“Will think about it later. But one thing I can tell you now… You are betraying Jisoo, who is, in case you forgot, your friend.”

Okay, that hurts.

“And you have to pay daily rent fee. My place isn’t free love hotel.”

———————  

Have you ever really loved Jisoo?

Soojung could never answer that question with either yes or no. They began dating without much expectation on her end, and evidently, it's always easier to like someone who loves you first.

Seo Jisoo is... perfect, for lack of better word. The best partner anyone could ever ask for. She's good natured, and good at imparting her cheerfulness to everyone around her. Well-planned person who knows what she wants and strives after it meticulously, dependable, also incredibly kind and patient. And Jisoo loves Soojung unconditionally - loves everything Soojung hates about herself and finds her beautiful even at her worst. Though it means disregarding her own welfare, Jisoo would do everything to make sure Soojung is never breaking, never be unhappy.

In contrast to everybody's shallow opinion, Mijoo is very different from Jisoo. That, Soojung has learned while they're being together.

While Jisoo offers peace and stability, Mijoo passionately comes up with yet another adventure everyday. Overwhelming at first, but Soojung quickly found herself being addicted to the other girl. They understand each other. It's like having some tell-tale telepathy skill, like they just make a three seconds eye contact and then burst into laughter because they know what's going on each other's mind. Mijoo treats Soojung like she's her sidekick and not a damsel-in-distress who needs to be protected at all cost; if Jisoo promises to bestow upon her the whole world, Mijoo otherwise takes her hand and invites her on a journey to discover the world together.

And most importantly, Mijoo makes her feel.

Now you're comparing them. Geez, Lee Soojung why are you like this? She chides herself, but the train of thoughts doesn't stop. A moment later, Soojung takes her phone and begins typing.

Dear Jisoo, there's something I want to tell you...

———————

Slap. Slap. Slap.

"Yah, stop stealing meat! There won't be anything left by the time Seunghee gets here!" Hyojung scolds, shooing away two pairs of naughty hands trying to snatch the chicken skewers she's been grilling for Seunghee's surprise birthday party.

The plan is simple, Soojung is trusted with task to haul her cousin's attention away for a day - which she did very well by dragging the younger girl to a bookstore located pretty far in downtown, thus sparing more than enough time for Jiho and the others to prepare barbeque party in small backyard of the liquor store.

"Incoming birthday girl!" Arin comes running from the house, alerting everyone, and they quickly grab their respective props; confetti and party blowers for Jiho, Mijoo, and Arin, while the most important cake is with the most sane person, Hyojung.

Loud tooot and happy birthday!! along with shower of confetti welcome Seunghee as she opens the door to her backyard, followed by Soojung and another college friends they'd invited as well. The birthday girl yells in actual shock before falling into happy crying mess and mumbles nonstop gratitude towards her friends.

"So!" Arin starts, when they are all seated in long wooden table filled with various kinds of grilled food. "Seunghee unnie who just turned twenty one today, please give some advices for this lovely 'lil sister of yours to get into university safely and be model student like you!"

"It's not that hard to get good marks." Seunghee manages to say with piece of beef in . "If you have enough will to study."

"Typical Seunghee." Some of them comment. They all laugh, but the outbursts isn't loud enough to bury down Jiho's voice pitching in, "Or you can go on a date with the TA."

Even Soojung notices Hyojung's usually friendly face hardens a bit, like, losing its friendliness, before slapping the dark haired girl on the shoulder. "How dare you suggest such obscene thing to my sister!" She hollers, her cheery expression is there again.

But no one responds, and it becomes awkward. So Hyojung quickly stands up. "I'm going to get more meat to feed all of you monsters."

"Wait I'll he—"

"Stay there!" Hyojung nearly shouts. Everyone freeze in even more stupor. Everyone and especially Jiho, who's already in half standing up position. So she tries again, softer. "I... I don't need help it's not that heavy. I'll be right back soon.."

———————

"Joo, is there something up with those two?" Soojung asks in whisper, propping her chin on Mijoo's shoulder.

"Yes." Mijoo holds her glass tightly, the second beer for her today. She takes a sip of it before continue. "I'm not in place to talk about somebody else's something. But yes, it's been going on for awhile."

Not in place to talk about someone else. Right. There's another thing about themselves that needs to be discussed as well. Soojung looks around, Hyojung keeps getting away with various reasons, Seunghee still with Arin and her other friends, Jiho is busy with her phone, typing something furiously.

"Mijoo-yah." Words swirl inside of her, yet none of them seem able to get past . "I... Let's..."

Let's go out for real. Just say it. It's not like that she would reject you. Soojung tries to convince herself.

"I want to go see the sunrise. The one you've said before." In the end, she doesn't believe herself.

"Really?" Mijoo looks unsure. "It's been extremely cold lately, we don't need to do that if you don't really want it."

"Nah I just said that I want to." A soft nod. "We've come so far.."

"Hm. You have a fine point. This is our last chance together, why not make the most of our time while it lasts, right?" The taller girl smiles.

She misses the way Soojung's expression tenses and eyes turn forlorn.

———————

Quick footsteps of someone chasing someone echo, striding throughout long corridor, down the stairs, and finally come to halt at the empty hall of their college.

"Please. Listen to me." Jiho's grip is firm around Hyojung's arm, stopping her from runaway even further.

"Do you really think that you passed and got all those straight As because we... Because of what we did?" The older girl turns around, shrugging Jiho's hand away roughly.

"I'm sorry, okay? I just kinda let it slip without even thinking!"

"Because it's been rooted deep in your bones, of course you don't need to think!" Hyojung lets out derisive laughter. "In order to gain something, you should present something else of equal value, that's what you believe, right?"

Jiho shifts uncomfortably. She hadn't expected such response. "Well but it's true."

"It's not always like that! I never persuaded the professor to give you good marks, you can get the worst grade for all I care and I'll still proudly tell the world I like Kim Jiho. In fact, I'm not waiting for you to be a someone successful like my parents, I'm waiting for you to be yourself. Just yourself."

Jiho's lips quiver a bit, like she still wants to talk back, but Hyojung already beats her to it. "Jiho-yah.. You're much more worthy than you think you are. If only you'd lower that stupid, stubborn pride of yours, just for a little bit, you'll be able to see it as well, I reckon."

And with that, Hyojung walks rapidly past Jiho, then out of the building, leaving the other girl alone with mind even more mussed than before.

———————

"I'm home!" Mijoo announced to no one in particular, kicking out her boots before going towards the kitchen to grab whatever her mother has made today. True to her intuition, hot dumpling soup welcomes her as she takes lid off a pot on the stove. The fresh aroma of pork and ginger makes her stomach twitch in hunger.

"Lee Mijoo. When did I ever raise you to be food thief?"

She freezes at the icy voice calling her name, turning slowly like deer in the headlight to find her mom leaning against the kitchen entrance, hands folded across chest and expression dangerous.

"What's the point of us paying for your train fares from Seoul if you’ve never spent more than half an hour in this house everyday and instead holing up in Jiho's place all the time?!" The old woman hollers. "What is this with the daughters in our family and desire to live independently.. You two don't even care about your parents?"

"Moooom~" Mijoo drawls oh-so-sweetly, latching onto her mom's side like an oversized, overly attached bear cub. "I'm sorry! I'll be good and stay at home helping you for the whole day tomorrow, I swear. Don't be angry, you'll get more wrinkles.."

Mrs. Lee rolls her eyes, making noise of indignance while brushing her daughter away. "I've heard same promises since weeks ago! Years even, since you ranaway to Seoul!"

"I won't break it this time!" Mijoo laughs, persistently following her mother. She unawarely bumps her hip against the dining table, yelping an ouch, then realizes something's fallen from the pocket of her jacket.

It's Soojung's phone - Soojung gave it to Mijoo because the clothes she was wearing earlier didn't have pockets and forgot to take it back before they parted ways.

———————

Mijoo knows snooping through her girlfriend's phone is never okay.

She glances at the white, slim device sitting nicely on her desk, its little red notification LED blinking slowly, as though tempting her. It's very unhelpful too that Soojung has foolishly set 940923 as her password.

Just peeking a bit won't hurt. No way someone like Soojung would have anything inappropriate saved inside her phone, right?

There are about five messages from Jisoo in the inbox, which all has been read but not replied:

Good morning! Have you eat breakfast? I miss you.

Is Okcheon really fun? I bet it is, since you seem too busy to even read my message. Well, enjoy your time! ;)

I saw a pic of you on Mijoo's Instagram! Hehe I'm so happy that you two get along well there! She's actually a nice and goofy person like I've said, right? But... I wish I were there as well. I really really miss you :(

Hey :) If you read this, I just want to say don't skip dinner because of whatever diet program s you've been doing, okay? I love you so much, you're perfection to me.

But the thing that's piquing Mijoo's interest more is dozen of unsent messages on the draft folder. She taps it open, feeling sharp twinges jabbing her chest as she skims through all them; apparently, Soojung has been trying to write a break-up letter, ranging from three-words-only let's break up, to longer one:

Dear Jisoo, there's something I've been thinking for awhile regarding us, and I need to tell you.

Maybe it's not the best idea for us to continue our relationship. It's just.. Everything between us aren't working out.

Though I hate to do this, I really think it's better if we end things now.

This must be confusing for you, but I've went through lots of confusion as well at first. So I hope one day you, too, can understand my decision.

Sorry, and thank you for everything you've done to me all this while.

I wish all the best for you.

———————

two winters ago

"Mijoo-yah. I.. I think I'm in love."

Slowly, Mijoo stopped from her activity of pouring cream into a cup of coffee, her expression morphed from completely concentrated to a horrified one, shot at her best friend who was standing next to her anxiously.

"Not with you of course, you crazy." Jisoo snorted. "Come here and see that girl, with glasses, reading book.."

They both turned around to the direction Jisoo pointed out. It was nine in the morning, they only had few customers that day, all of them were reading something. Suddenly, Mijoo felt her blood run cold.

"Yeah. Face like perpetually upset pug." She said jokingly. Jokes always made her calm.

"NO. The one on next table, moron!"

Mijoo's heart sinked even lower. "Oh. Well, I'm happy you found love at last. Good luck then."

"Don't good luck me, help me." Jisoo hissed.

"What? What am I supposed to do?" Mijoo forced a laugh, raising an eyebrow.

"Aren't you sort of close with her? I've seen you two talking numerous times before.."

"Uh. Talking, yes. Close, not really..."

"What is she like? Is she from our college? What department she's in? Do you know her name? Her age? Is she single? Does she like girls?"

"Whoa whoa one question at a time, tiger."

Mijoo swallowed hard, willing her voice not to show any kind of emotion. "Her name is Lee Soojung, she's in communication design major, our senior of one year, and..."

And I'm in love with her too.

"And?" Jisoo repeated, excitement Mijoo had never seen before in her eyes.

"And she's available. She will like you, I guess."

———————

The last day of January marks the end of Seollal holiday period. Here comes February, which is a much more quiet month, and everyone in the liquor shop - including Soojung and Mijoo - finally can catch their breath for awhile.

"Wait. Don't." Mijoo puts a finger against Soojung's lips. They just earned permission to leave early, reward for their nonstop hard works during the Korean new year before, and Soojung didn't waste any time to drag the younger girl to their 'second home', pushing her down the couch and stripping her out of thick padded coat.

"What? You have another plan for today?" Soojung laughs breathlessly, planting kisses over the bony fingers.

"Nope. But there’s something I gotta tell you."

"Mmhm?"

"We—" Mijoo stops momentarily, mixture of words brewing inside, but then realizes there's no other, nicer way to say this. "We have to break up now."

"What?"

"We still have a week.." Soojung falls silent watching Mijoo sits up, suddenly taking out her missing phone and unlocking it. Her eyes go back and forth, from list of unreplied messages sent by Jisoo which Mijoo's showing now, to unreadable expression on the younger's face. Sickening, nauseous feeling seeps into her chest.

"You read my messages?" She says, quietly, in disbelief.

"Sue me all you want for breaching of privacy later." Mijoo's voice begins to sound scratchy. "But say, can you betray someone like this any longer? She stayed up all night just to talk with you and you never replied her even one single word. What is it with this letter? We didn't plan for you to ditch Jisoo like this!"

"It's.. Because I think i love you more.."

"We can't do this. Jisoo's my best friend how could you treat her like she's some sort of free trial lover?! God I should've never went along with your damn idea!"

"Why are you so pathetically scared of your best friend?!" Soojung snaps. "You wouldn't make move first if I didn't. Since we first met, if only you'd have more courage to speak up honestly to her no way we'd end up this way!"

"Oh so you say I'm coward now!" Mijoo fires back hurriedly, head aching so much and beginning to lose its ability to think. "Look at yourself! You're here because you were afraid to face your mother and her new family aren't you?"

"Huh? Why are you dragging my family into this mess—"

"What do you think about everything you've planned so far— you intend to write some Pullitzer-winning, made-up reasons to hide this affair and break up with Jisoo, don't you? Who's the coward?! You're a deserter! A liar!" Trembling finger points out accusingly. "Even if we keep dating, how can I be sure that one day when we fight or you find someone else better than me, just like I am better than Jisoo now, you wouldn't lie and leave me?!"

"We're not lovers, Soojung, we're just two sinners."

They both pant heavily, and Mijoo slowly regains her vision back - everything before her that seemed blurry from haze of anger now turns clear. Just by now, she finally realize how Soojung's face has been really, really wet of tears.

"Is that how you truly see me all this time?" Every of Soojung's words comes out shaky; and at the same time, causes stinging pain inside Mijoo's heart.

"I have a lot to say to you too.. Like I want to tell you how much I'm grateful for what we had this past month, and being with you was the happiest moment in my life."

. . .

Why regret only comes when everything has burnt?

"Guess you won't believe it, right? You've also never believed that time when I said, the falling in love part isn't lie."

———————

Jiho and Hyojung appear from the main bedroom right a minute after Soojung's gone, don't even try hiding the fact that they've been there the whole time, listening - not that they intended to anyway. But just like Jiho had once said, place with less than a million won monthly rent fee doesn't come with the best soundproofing system.

"Please tell me you guys are here to kill me."

"Why the hell are you still here and not after her?! You're so— Oh goddamnit!" Jiho kicks a cushion laying on the floor in frustration.

"Hey.." Hyojung scoots closer to Mijoo, her broad shoulder. Jiho follows soon, and they envelop her with the closest hug they can give. "It's gonna be okay. Everything's gonna be okay."

Mijoo eventually breaks down.

———————

Jiho walks her two guests home; her cousin first, then now Hyojung. Their feet fall heavy on the pavement, the older girl few steps ahead. By the time they reach the strip of sidewalk in front of a high class mansion, home to the Choi family, Jiho stops.

"Do you want to be my girlfriend?"

It takes quite awhile for the words to sink, and Hyojung's round eyes slowly go wide as she turns around to meet Jiho's. "Where's that come from?"

"Here." Jiho points to her own chest. "Sincerely from the bottom of my heart."

"Look.. Hyojung, I'm not trying to kid you here." She adds, because the older girl looks torn between wanting to runaway or haul Jiho to nearest mental asylum.

"What's been possessing you? Lee Mijoo?"

"Mijoo unnie's still alive and busy weeping at her own problem, cannot possess someone else."

"Oh. Right."

Hyojung has known Jiho for a long time - loved her and waited for a long time for Jiho to get over her silly anxiety about their slight differences; Hyojung who always came to school with trendiest bicycle or sometimes car versus Jiho who wore secondhand uniforms and brought old textbooks previously used by her cousin, a student council president whose name never left Top 3 versus mediocre student who had to struggle passing Math and sometimes take remedial classes, daughter of businessman owning biggest company in Okcheon versus daughter of farmers couple who sell fresh vegetables every morning.

Hyojung looks like a princess, so I shall be one too to be a good match.

We will go out when I'm taller than you.

I'll be your girlfriend when I get better grades than you.

Let's make our status official when I can afford a nice car so we don't need to take bus when going on a date.

I'll take you to the top of Eiffel and by that time, I'll confess to you seriously.

Jiho always came up with even more absurd excuses every year no matter how far they've gone with their relationship and how much Hyojung tried to prove her undying love.

"It's just, seeing them two makes me realize I've been taking what I have for granted." Sad smile on Jiho's lips. "I love you. I don't want to lose you."

"Wow." Hyojung mumbles in astonishment, cloud of her breath covering half of her face. "I can't believe I'm finally hearing those words from your mouth after all these years."

"I know. I'm sorry." Jiho wrings her hands together nervously. "So. Do you still want to be with me or...."

"Hm." Hyojung smirks, watching flustered Jiho with little mirth. "You won't be such a worrywart over things like who spends more money for who?"

"I won't."

"You will let me choose where to go during our date?"

"Yes."

"Even if it's pocha with tarp and plastic stools you often visited with Seunghee?"

"That place is so cheap and nasty how could I bring you there—" But Hyojung narrows her eyes, here you go again, and Jiho laughs. "Oh well, wherever you want, milady."

"Then it's a yes." Hyojung smiles, letting herself being pulled into close hug. "Hell, it's always been a yes for you."

———————

six winters ago

Mijoo stumbled out of the basketball court later than another players after they won that day's match and succesfully brought their school to the semifinals of national tournament. A miracle, one would say, since this was the first time ever for Woollim High School's women basketball team to participate.

The changing room was already empty just like she'd hoped, and Mijoo finally let out a low grunt, wincing at the throbbing pain in her right ankle.

"Lee Mijoo-ssi!"

The familiar voice coming from outside the room startled the hell out of Mijoo. She turned, finding Seo Jisoo just kicked the door open with scowling face. The slightly older girl walked over, then placed a little cylindrical object into the palm of her hand.

"What is this?" She blinked.

"Muscle balm, what does it look like?" Jisoo said, looking incisively at the taller girl's ankle. "Why didn't you tell us if you're injured?"

"We don't have subs. Tell or not, no one can replace me." Mijoo shrugged. Their school's team had just been established few months prior to the tournament, only had six players, most of them were first year, and - not to sounded cocky, but Mijoo was really the best shooting guard they got.

"Still, you can't play in this condition. What if your injury gets worse? You might never be able to play anymore for the rest of your life, y'know?" Jisoo clucked her tongue, followed with long sigh. "At least if you tell me, I could help covering your position so you wouldn't need to move around a lot."

"Also, I believe Mimi and Bini and Yooa are capable enough of doing their role, they'll be upset if you keep playing on your own. Be more confident with your teammate!"

"Sorry, captain." Mijoo smiled sheepishly.

Jisoo broke into a huge grin, sliding an arm around Mijoo's waist to help her walk towards a bench. "Look. We're friends for life, right?"

"Yeah of course." Mijoo sat down, wincing when Jisoo kneeled beside her and took off her shoe to examine the injury.

"So promise me this. If you ever need something, want something, just say it. You can always say anything to me. As much as you're willing to sacrifice for your friends, I'd love to be the best support for you too."

———————

"Soojung-ah, Mijoo is here. She wants to talk with you." Soojung's grandmother tells from the first floor, following doorbells couple of minutes ago.

"Tell her to go home, please." She retorts, not wanting to leave the comfort of carpeted floor and Cookie lazily curling up on her lap, emanating warmth. What's there to talk about anyway, in three days they'll have to go back to Seoul. Everything has over to Soojung.

The old, raspy voice comes back after awhile. "Mijoo said she will wait. Are you sure you don't want to come down a bit?"

Soojung glanced at the window. It's all dark blue sky and white snow falling violently to the ground. Light snow storm, weather forecast had informed earlier. Mijoo would give up against the cold in no time, she decides.

"No."

———————

Around an hour later, her assumption's proven wrong. And regret comes in full force.

"Unnie! Mijoo unnie is still waiting for you!" Seunghee, who just arrived home, says half-shouting. Even her shoes is still on her feet. "For Christ sake, go get her. Unless you want to find dead, frozen body by our front door this morning."

Outside the window, world has reduced into all black and white, trees and buildings disappear behind abundant of snow swirling so densely. Fear pulses inside Soojung, congealing the marrow of her bones as she flying down the stairs for the front door.

Mijoo sits still on the porch, arms tight around knees and there's audible clacking teeth. The sight of it slaps Soojung harder than below-freezing temperature. She wastes no more time to help Mijoo stand up, draping one of the long arms across her shoulders and heading inside.

"What the.."

On the entryway, all of the elders are watching wide-eyed, until Seunghee shushes and leads them all into the living room for some 'quality family time'.

———————

"Are you crazy?! It's ing blizzard, Joo! You could die!" Once they are save in her room, Soojung quickly takes Mijoo's damp jacket off. Haphazardly shoving clean towels, thick blanket, then eventually herself. It feels like hugging a giant ice block, and Soojung has never been this guilty.

"I missed hearing you call me that." Weak smile forms at Mijoo's pale face. "I miss you."

"We'll talk later. Now let's get you a warm shower then rest."

Soojung ends up not sleeping that night. It's a circle of her tossing and turning in her side of bed, then getting up to check the temperature of Mijoo's body, staring at the sleeping face, then back to lying restlessly at her own side of bed all over again. When the clock strikes three, Soojung feels the hand she's been holding is moving slowly.

"Go back to sleep.." Soojung coos, as if talking with a newbord baby, and it makes Mijoo giggles softly. She still shifts to half-sitting position though, looking up to meet the shorter girl's expecting eyes.

"I'm sorry for what I've said the last time." Mijoo starts. "I didn't mean to hurt you— God I hate myself so much for saying all those mean things to you." For days, Mijoo's been mumbling apology hundred times even in her sleep. But when this time comes for her to say it out loud, it still feels so, so horrible.

"Don't think about it anymore." Soojung says, tilting her head to Mijoo's shoulder, her fingers playing with the end of dark hair. "It's impossible for me to hate you however."

"But I still say we break up." At the corner of her eyes, Mijoo sees Soojung's smile immediately falters. The horror of their last fight is replayed inside her mind. It makes her dizzy. Unable to breath. But Mijoo forces herself to inhale deeply. Things need to be set right. Now.

"It's best for us not to meet anymore after we go back to Seoul. At least until we get over each other."

"Why do you have to make things so hard for us?" Tears begin to well in the back of the older girl's eyes, ready to flow again. "Why is it so hard for us to be happy?"

"Jisoo will make you happy, that we both know." Mijoo replies calmly. "She loves you, needs you. Will break into irreparable pieces if you ever leave her like this."

"And you don't?" Soojung hisses.

"I am, as you said, a coward. Your love is something too precious for someone who doesn't even have courage to face the world and declare their own feelings."

"It's not too late to change that! We'll talk to her honestly if that's what you want. She will understand!"

"I'd considered so too for awhile. But.. No, I can't." Mijoo insists. Her voice is still so steady. "Jisoo always told me to stop sacrificing myself for her sake. But when you look at it closely, it's her who's too selfless and kind. She was there to save me on all of my worst moments. It's time I become her best support."

"I can't understand. Love is.. The strangest thing ever. Is this even love?" Is it supposed to be this excruciating?

"This doesn't mean I don't love you. But we both have commitments. You're with Jisoo. I am her friend. I just want us to be responsible to it and that's all. Or else, we'll never grow up, never know loyalty and how to treasure anything we have."

Both of Mijoo’s hands softly touch Soojung's warm cheeks, guiding the older girl to meet her eyes. Things she always does when she wants Soojung to listen at her seriously.

"Soojung, just like you said, our moments together were the best thing ever happened to me. I will never take it back that you're the love of my life. Only maybe, we're not meant to be together. Hey.. Love doesn't mean you have to be with someone, you know? So now, I learned to give you up. To say farewell. Because I know I can trust Jisoo to take care of you, better than anyone else including myself."

Her eyes are still wet with tears, but Soojung finally nods. "I have a request before we break up for good."

"Sure."

"Let's go on a date. One last date."

———————

They slept until high noon, soundly and peaceful. It is Soojung who then wakes up first because of faint sound of footsteps facing back and forth from somewhere behind her room's door.

"Mijoo, wake up." She taps Mijoo's shoulder few times, until the other girl opens her bleary eyes. "It's midday already. You should eat a bit."

So off they go leaving the comfortable bed, half-alive Mijoo dragged slightly by the shorter girl. When Soojung pulls the door open, four figures of her family - and a cat - freeze instantly on their track of pacing back and forth the second floor hallway.

"Do all of you have any special reason for standing over there?" Soojung deadpans.

"Uhm. Yes. We are..." Granny turns to the other three, signaling help.

"Planning to redecorate your room’s door!" Seunghee blurts out to the rescue right in time.

"Yes! We are discussing about which colour would look good here! Right, honey?" Soojung's aunt and uncle nods rapidly.

"Mmhm! Say, what about blue?"

Soojung chuckles, shaking her head at their antics. "Okay, go on with the discussion.. And now if you'd excuse us, me and Mijoo are kind of starving here and we need to get some food."

They move aside, making way for the two, all faces comedically stunned at how Soojung and Mijoo's hand linked closely.

"Oh, and Seunghee.."

"Y—yes!" Seunghee answers so quickly she almost bit her tongue.

"Can I borrow your hiking boots? We're going to see sunrise tomorrow morning."

———————

Half of Okcheon - everyone besides those people who are already on their way to the market for trading business - is still sleeping when Soojung and Mijoo reached the summit of small mountain located in northeast of the town. The walk up road was a lot shorter than they expected, leaving them enough time to kill. They sit closely behind a small campfire Mijoo has set, occasionally talking about random things, until beam of orange begins to spread across the horizon.

The scenery is absolutely one Soojung never forget in her entire life; valleys shrouded in fog and the sun goes up little by little, casting warm, brilliant glow all over the land. It's wonderful and now she understands why Mijoo wanted to show this.

"So. This is it." Soojung says, eyes never leave the amazing view sprawled before them, but her hand holds steadily to Mijoo's.

"This is it."

A pause. Then Soojung asks. "Do you regret this?" Do you regret everything we've done?

"No." Mijoo replies to it without single hesitation. "Do you?"

"No, of course no."

Another pause, longer than the previous one.

"Joo..." Soojung trails off, unable to quite find the right words to carry out all the complicated feelings bubbling inside her. I love you is a way too heavy sentence; too sacred to be used by someone like them. And Soojung knows if she say those, they would fall once again. She would.

"Promise you won't forget about me.."

No tears, they've decided before. This time Soojung doesn't break the rule.

"Never. Until the day I die, you're my favourite sunrise."

Always in my heart.

———————

From the corner of her eyes, Soojung can see Jiho and Hyojung are worriedly staring at her while bidding last goodbye personally to their friend in the other side of the station hall. And she is 100% sure it is because she had chopped more than half the length of her hair before they all went there.

"Little change once in awhile is good. It looks fresher like this, right?" Soojung hadtold them earlier.

No one bought it of course.

"Yes. You're so pretty like this." Mijoo still complimented nonetheless.

———————

"Are you two okay?" Seunghee asks afterwards, when Soojung is about to step into the train.

"We are." The elder lets out a worn-out, forced grin. "We will be. In time."

"I'm not sure if I can be any of help.. But if you want to talk about just anything and have nobody else out there in Seoul to listen to you, you know you can always call me. Anytime, twenty four seven, alright?"

"And you know you're the best, sweetest sister to me, right?" She ruffles Seunghee's hair, and the girl whines in protest.

"Take care there, Soojung unnie."

“Yeah, will do.” They share last brief hug before Soojung disappears into the train car.

———————

"Don't ever try, midget."

Mijoo is already behind her before Soojung ever has chance to lift her luggage. She reaches out, gesturing the older girl to hand the red rucksack, still as big as that time they departed from Seoul.

"Don't ever try to look cool, weakling." Soojung shakes her head. "Jiho told me about the forearm injury you got while working in the store." Together, they hoist all of their belongings one by one onto the overhead bin.

"One of these days I'll definitely sew that kid's big mouth."

Both of them laugh at the joke, it doesn't sync along with the hollow pain in their hearts, but the two keep schooling their faces into the best smile they can muster. Train begins to move leaving Okcheon Station as Soojung and Mijoo sit down, side by side, in a journey to their separate ways.

———————

Hello!!

I'm back with cheater!Soul nobody ever asked HAHA! Have started this story since Joy and Seulong released their song, the reason why it took hella long was because I kept changing the plot and avoiding to alter their characterization too far (;_;) Half of this story haven't been beta-ed so sorry for all of the non-senses

Baaaiiii the way, I hereby declare that I have never even once in my life set foot on Mijoo and Jiho's hometown, so please do not ever use this as guide for your trip if you want to visit Okcheon lel everything written here are completely fictional things
Doonjoo-bong (the place they went to see sunrise) looks like this.

Hope you enjoyed my fic!

/sits and waits for people to destroy me