It was a Monday morning, the water drizzled outside my window as i lay in bed. I wasn't alone. My daughter was snoring softly beside me. She was 5, the fluffiest brown hair you’ll ever see and a tan resembling her fathers. I rubbed my eyes and looked at the time, 5am. Lucky me. Today was the day we picked up Kai. He was my husband of nearly 8 years now, we started dating in high school. 5 years ago, he left for enlistment. And they liked him so much, they wanted him in the airforce and so he stayed another 3 years after the mandatory enlistment. We were supposed to enlist together, but due to my heart condition i was not eligible. And unbeknownst to us, i was also pregnant. 

It had been years now. I missed him every single day, i wrote him letters every week and sent him photos. I tried to comfort myself but watching videos of him just wasn't enough… i missed waking up in his arms. i missed our petty arguments than ended up us kissing. i missed coming home from work to seeing him cooking. i missed the way he’d look after me when i was sick. i missed the way he’d bring home flowers if i had had a particularly rough day at work. i missed him. i missed him every second. I blinked away the tears i hadn't realised were falling, sitting up and rubbing my arm as i watched the droplets race down the window. I got myself out of bed and went off tot he kitchen. I stood there alone after making myself a cup of coffee, looked at the empty kitchen. Remembering the times we would dance around to whatever random music came on the radio. I took a sip before hearing Hwasa start to wake. “Mama?” 

i got her and i showered and dressed. His flight wasn't due in for another few hours so her and i set ourselves down in the living room and started designing banners. She chattered on and on about how she was excited to finally meet her daddy. I remember writing the letter to Kai that i was pregnant and his response to that was a letter that read about how he was excited and that he was sorry that he wasn't there. I sent him the ultrasound updates, photos of me pregnant, my progress, when she was born… Everything important i sent to him so he didn't miss out. i admit… it was pretty crap to be honest. Going through pregnancy alone. I mean, i had my best friend, Chen, with me but it wasn't the same you know? He wasn't with me all the time. I wish Kai was there but i’d never hold it against him.. 

When Hwasa wrote her first letter to him, he wrote back that he cried when he read it and that he cant wait to meet his little girl. We decorated our banners for him, had some lunch before it was finally time to go. I sat in the car a bit even after we both buckled and ready. I was just not comprehending it to be honest. Was this even real? It wasn't until Hwasa whined that we weren't moving i got into gear and drove off to the obstacle course that was the airport.

[For full effect in my opinion, play Vance Joys’ ‘Fire and the Flood’ before continuing]

It took a little time but we finally got there… i walked into the airport, anticipation making my bounce on the balls of my feet. He was coming home today. I held the banner in my hands as i waited, in paint it read ‘We’ve waited 1852 days for this moment!’ My daughter beside me as we waited for her daddy to come home. My hands shook a little as i joined the crowd of families waiting for their partners as well, tears had already been shed by some. He was coming home today. I could feel my tears building up in my throat as i waited. The automatic doors slid open as soldiers in their green uniforms and shaved head walked out, people started running to their partners. I watched as they were getting embraced and was starting to feel a bit of stress. Where was he? They kept filing out but alas, the soft pair of eyes hadn't met mine yet. 

“Mama where is he?” My daughter asks me and i broke from my frustrating search to look down at her, she had a cute banner in her little hands. I sent her a smile. “He’ll be here soon.” i look up again to search the sea of camouflage. And thats when his eyes met mine. I held my banner up high for him, “Jongin!” i waved it and Hwasa held her banner up excitedly and waved it. Tears stung my eyes as he looked at us and he ran to us. 

Everything seemed to go in slow motion, He ran over and collected me in his arms and kissed me, it was gentle and long awaited. i cupped his face in mine before he pulled away, he looked down at Hwasa and he fell to his knees and pulled her into his chest. “DADDY!” I fell to my knees and wrapped my arms around them, he put an arm around me and i broke down, i bunched his uniform in my hands as i held onto him, the banners since discarded. 

“My loves-“ He sobbed as he held us. I buried my head into his neck and sobbed, he was home. My husband was finally home. “I love you so much-“ i sobbed into his skin. I could feel his protective arm around me, his hand massaging my hip. He sobered a little and gave a small laugh, making me poke my eyes up from his neck. “Oh look at this little girl- she's much prettier in real life-“ He kissed over the girls tan face and she giggled happily. “Daddy has no hair!” She reached up and rubbed his peach fuzz equivalent of hair he had on his head. He laughed softly and wiped his tears on his shoulder before hugging us both close to him. 

We sat together in a tight embrace on the airport floor. “Alright, i love you both so much but i need to get my bags.” He chuckled softly and kissed my hair, wiping his tears. I give a nod and moved away, collecting up Hwasa as he helped me to my feet. I held his hand tightly, he collected the banners and we left off to the baggage conveyer belts. I didn't let him go as he pulled his large suitcase off the belt, a birthday present from my parents years ago when we moved in together. “We have so much to catch up on- Lay finally got married and-“ He pecked my lips to shut me up before giving me a charming smile. “Love, that sounds amazing.. But i’d rather hear about you.” He smiled at me and i softened up. “W-well no-not much happened with me..” i blushed. “I’m sure you can catch me up. Come on… Lets go home..”