Everyone knew it was coming. The members, the company, the fans. No matter how hard he tried, he couldn't carry on this way forever. When the news hit that Zhang Yixing had officially left EXO, everyone went into a frenzy. The members spammed his kakaotalk begging him to come back, all of them clutching the individual letters Yixing had left for them on the kitchen table before leaving. The company were working on a lawsuit to bring him back, adding to the other 3 they currently had. And the fans... they divided. People who had never supported Yixing were overjoyed, spamming Twitter and Weibo with hateful messages and the ones who had loved Yixing and always supported him were torn, they wished he was still in EXO but they knew how he'd suffered under the hold of SM and now he was free, he'd be healthier, he'd be happier and that's all they wanted, even if it meant him leaving his brothers. After a month, the news dies down and EXO return to their usual lives, but they occasionally slipped up, seeking the member that was now a ghost.

Chanyeol would giddily grab his guitar and rush to Yixing's room, excited to play with him, only to remember once he walked into the empty room, his hand clasping tightly around the guitar, feeling the strings cut into his fingers.

Sehun would go running up to Yixing's door, clutching his Mandarin book because Mandarin lessons with his favourite ge were always his favourite part of the week. "Ge! Ge! Ge! Are you ready?" He'd open the door and be faced with the cold reality of a dark room and a missing ge. He slumps back against the wall sliding down, tears gathering in his eyes. "Ge wo shiang ni... (1)"

Baekhyun would be sat on the sofa with his and Yixing's favourite movie playing, too excited to wait for his cuddle buddy to come through the door. After it gets to the part that always makes Baekhyun nuzzle his head into Yixing's neck to hide his tears, he realises that Yixing isn't there, and he will never be there again. Baekhyun's tears hide behind his hands that day.

Kyungsoo rushes around, preparing the food for everyone, he was making kimchi spaghetti, because he knew the members loved it, especially Yixing. He'd helped Kyungsoo taste test it for over 10 hours, scrunching his nose up at the less desirable versions but still happily eating all that Kyungsoo gave him. Kyungsoo snaps back from his memory and brings out the plates setting them out, once he'd finished filling them all he calls s for tea. They immediately rush in and take a seat, wolfing down their meal. It's only when Kyungsoo looks up halfway through the meal, he notices the plate next to him is still full. His eyes trail up the chair and he realises he no longer sees Yixing's eyes gazing at Kyungsoo as he ate. Yixing's no longer there. Kyungsoo doesn't finish his meal and goes straight to bed. The other members see the full plate and understand. Kyungsoo cries himself to sleep that night.

Jongin's dressed in workout gear, about to head to the studio to work on the new choreography like he and Yixing do every week. He stops in front of Yixing's door, knocking on it. "Hyung, you ready to go now?" He opens the door and walks into the cold room, heart breaking as he remembers Yixing's not here anymore. He doesn't go to the studio that day, he stays lying on the floor of Yixing's room, tears staining his cheeks.

Minseok goes up to his and Yixing's secret hideaway one night, the roof of the dorm. He walks around the corner and finds their spot, hidden underneath a makeshift roof, chairs pressed next to each other. He lugs the box he was carrying onto the table in front of the chairs and empties out the contents. He lays the blankets across the chairs and brings out the extra ones to put over the top of them, he places the pillows on the chairs and pulls out the two soju bottles placing them on the table. He flops down and sighs loudly. He cracks open the bottle and drinks slowly. When he's about halfway through the bottle, he notices a shooting star. He gasps, hand shooting out to slap the chair beside him. "Yixing look!" He turns to the empty chair beside him, realisation sinking into his bones. He recoils tight into his seat and wraps himself tighter in his blankets. Raising his bottle to the sky he makes his wish. "Bring him back to me... please."

Jongdae has his camera in one hand and an air horn in the other. He pauses outside the bedroom door, turning on the camera. He turns it to face himself, chuckling quietly. "Sorry Xing hyung but you're the last one on my list." He turns the camera around again before bursting open the door, blaring the air horn. He bursts out laughing until he turns the light on and realises no ones there. No one’s been there for a while. Junmyeon comes scrambling through, startled awake by the air horn. "What the fu-" he stops when he sees Jongdae facing into the room, shoulders shaking roughly, camera dangling from the wrist strap. He doesn't say anything as he walks towards Jongdae, arms wrapping around his waist. In a flash, Jongdae turns around to bury his face into Junmyeon's shoulder, sobs escaping him. "I know Jongdae, I miss him too."

One night Junmyeon's sleeping, curled in on himself. He hears the door open and suppresses a smile, knowing who it is. He feels a warm body pressed against his back. He feels the arms wrapped around his waist and the warm breath spread across his neck. "Hi Myeonnie." He blushes at the nickname, even though he's gotten the same greeting every night for the past 2 years. "Hi Xingie." He feels the arms around him tighten and he rests a hand on the arm draped over his waist. He's lulled back to sleep by the sound of calm breathing and the slight press of lips against his shoulder. In the morning when he wakes, he rubs the arm around his waist. "Morning Xingie." The arm around him stiffens. "Hyung, I'm not Yixing." Junmyeon's eyes widen and he turns to face a bleary-eyed Sehun. "I'm sorry hyung, but I could hear you crying last night, I didn't know how to make you feel better, but when I cuddled you, you muttered something and I knew I needed to be here for you." Sehun's avoiding Junmyeon's gaze. "What did I say, Hunnie?" Sehun lifts his eyes to meet Junmyeon's and Junmyeon can see the pain hidden behind them. "You said... 'Hi Xingie'." Junmyeon feels his throat constricting, heart beating heavily and tears misting his eyes. Sehun just cuddles him closer, the hand resting on the back of Junmyeon's neck rubbing slow circles. "It's okay to miss him, I do too, and hyung, it's okay to still love him." The sobs fell from Junmyeon's lips at the last sentence, heart feeling like it was ripping out of his ribs, body aching for the touch of someone he'll never have again. The touch of a ghost.

i wrote this a while ago one day and i wanted to put it on here

(1) - I miss you