D - 7 Till Christmas 

 

Christmas season was in full swing at the Wang’s with the entire apartment decorated through and through with Christmas decorations, with a giant ten foot tall tree as the piece de resistance. Everything was glittering and shining and the entire apartment was filled to the brim with Christmas joy- all thanks to Hajin. 

 

Hajin loved Christmas. She loved every aspect of it. Buying gifts for people you loved, spending time with them, decorating the house from top to bottom, gingerbread houses and ugly sweaters, she loved it all.

 

So, on the other hand, was a lot less enthusiastic, he had been a bit of a grinch before he had met Hajin but he loved Hajin and that meant accepting her love of Christmas that she started celebrating promptly once the clock strikes twelve after Halloween. He loved Christmas too, if it meant he was spending it with Hajin. 

 

The two were sat on the couch while Hajin dutifully recreated her Christmas television marathon that she followed every year. So just didn’t understand how she could watch claymation “Rudolph” this many times without wanting to claw her eyes out but like the good husband he was, he cuddled up with her while she watched the movie for the umpteenth time. 

 

But despite his jests, So loved how much Hajin loved Christmas. He loved how happy the season made her and how enthusiastic she was about things and in the five years since they’ve been together she had made him appreciate the holidays with just the two of them, their only little family he appreciated it now especially when he saw the little bump protruding from the ugly Christmas sweaters that she insisted they wear every day for the two weeks leading up to the big day and he couldn’t wait the next Christmas that they would spend with their little girl. He couldn’t take his eyes off of his beautiful wife as his heart swelled up at the sight of her.

 

He drank in the sight of her. She was sat upright, revelling in the joy of Rudolph  and… crying? As the movie draws to a close and Rudolph finally gets to be in the front position of the sleigh. Hajin begins to tear up which soon turns into full on sobs. 

 

“Stop staring at me you creep.” Hajin says, turning away and burying her face in her hands. 

 

“Are you crying… over Rudolph becoming head reindeer?” So snorts. 

 

“Stop laughing at me. It’s all your fault that I’m like this. It’s the hormones.” Hajin says, refusing to look in his direction but So can’t help but break out into huge bursts of laughter. 

 

“Stop it! You’re so mean. You’re not allowed to laugh at me when this is all your fault.” Hajin yelps, tears still running down her face. She swats at So, whose laughter only grows louder. 

 

“Ok, ok, I’m sorry, now please, call of the attacks, my lady. I can’t possibly fight against you and win. I shall offer up a cup of the finest hot chocolate that all the lands have to offer as a peace treaty.” So says, attempting to stop the laughter. He lifts his hands up in mock defeat as Hajin scowls at him. 

 

“Fine.” Hajin says, leaning back and smiling in victory. 

 

So walks to the kitchen and makes the hot chocolate, loading it up with marshmallows, sprinkles, and whipped cream because Hajin thinks that’s the only way to do things during Christmas time. It’s a balancing act trying not to drop any of the sprinkles on the white carpet but it makes it straight into Hajin’s waiting hands, free of spills. So plops down on the couch next to Hajin and holds her close.

 

“What did you get me for Christmas?” Hajin suddenly says, turning to face him and then pointedly towards the wrapped gifts under the tree.

 

“You’ve been asking me every day for the last two weeks since I’ve placed them there. You should know by now that I won’t tell you. It’s amazing that you still bother asking every year.” So says, rolling his eyes.  

 

“Why won’t you tell me? They’ve been tempting me under the beautiful tree that I decorated.” 

 

“I was the one that decorated it! Besides, there’s only a week left till Christmas so what’s the rush to know now?”  

 

“It’s only because you wouldn’t let me get on the ladder! I directed you so I was the mastermind behind it all. I’m the brain and you’re the brawn. And what if your present is so much better than mine? I don’t want to lose again. Can I have a clue?”

 

“Are you saying that it’s a good idea for you, who’s five months pregnant and has two left feet to get on a ladder that high and the answer is still no on the present by the way.”

 

“Well, I’m not telling you what I got you.”

 

“How will I live on? Oh, and don’t try and sneak a peek, I’ve y trapped it.”

 

“You what?” Hajin asked, turning to him in shock.

“y trapped it. See that string connected to the presents? If you touch the presents it’ll activate the trap and an unidentified projectile will be launched” So says, pointing to the string  that was rigged up to a bucket on the wall. 

 

“You’re too much.” Hajin says, rolling her eyes. 

 

“Every year, you try to peek. The steaming and resealing method doesn’t work, by the way. I totally knew.”

 

“What? I have no idea what you’re talking about.” She leaps up from the couch heads towards the kitchen.

 

“Sure sure.” 

___________________

Christmas Day 

 

“Hajin. Hajin, wake up, if you don’t we’ll be late for lunch.” So says, leaning over towards his sleeping wife and shaking her shoulder gently.

 

“I don’t want to. I’m tired.” Hajin says, her voice muffled by the pillow in which she had buried her face in. 

 

“What’s wrong? You love Christmas.” So tried to keep calm but it was just so out of character for Hajin who would’ve normally woken him up at sunrise to open presents. He gently coaxes her, hoping to get her out of bed.

 

“I’m scared.” Hajin says, rolling over to face him. Her eyes are red and puffy and So can tell that she’s been crying again. 

 

“Don’t be. The doctor says that there’s only a ten percent chance that the baby could have con heart disease. The odds are in our favour and there’s no use worrying about something that we can’t change. Are you going to love her any less?” 

 

So Hajin’s hair and reassures her even though he’s scared too. But he knows that one of them has to be strong and he’s willing to do that for Hajin, so he tries to convince her, and himself, that it’ll all be ok because he can’t bear to watch the tears well up in her eyes as she takes on the blame for something that is blameless. 

 

“Of course not! I’ll love this child more than anything in this world… but.. heart disease runs in my family and.. I just want out baby to be healthy and to live a happy life.” 

 

“Fate works in strange ways and if that’s in the cards there’s nothing we can do but love this child to the best of our abilities and be the best parents possible to her, right? Now get up! It’s time to open presents!”

 

He scoops her up in his arms and carries her towards the living room and he’s thankful that she doesn’t protest but instead, she wraps her arms around his neck and snuggles her face into his chest and he’s hopeful because that means that the very least, she knows that she can lean on him and won’t try to take on everything alone. 

 

“Present time!” So says, bending down next to their ginormous tree. He holds Hajin close and beckons her towards the presents under the tree. She reluctantly unwraps her arms from his neck and reaches towards the presents, with reassurance from him. She reaches for the smallest box first which immediately triggers the y trap that So had set up. 

 

Little glittery plastic bits floated through the air, covering them. Hajin sticks out her hand, catching the bits of plastic in her palm. 

 

“This was your y trap?” Hajin says, turning her face to look at her husband who beams at her. 

 

“It’s a white Christmas! It was looking more and more like we wouldn’t get any snow on Christmas and I couldn’t let that happen. Not to my beautiful wife.” 

 

“I love you. So much.” 

“I love you too. Now open your presents.” So hands her the small box that she had dropped in her lap. 

 

“It’s nothing big. I just saw it in a shop and the shopkeeper told me that it was a replica of a Goryeo era hairpin, but it just felt.. right.” So rushes out when Hajin says nothing upon opening his present. 

 

“I love it. It’s beautiful.” Hajin says, admiring the delicate white peonies and the vibrant red holly that surrounds it. She fingers the delicate leaves and the pretty purple butterfly and imagines a Goryeo era man giving a beautiful hair pin like this to his lover. She imagines a man that can’t wait to give the woman he loves this hairpin. The woman that he adores more than anything in the world and loves despite all her faults. The man that loves his partner more than anything, more than he even loves himself. 

 

Just like the man who has given her this hairpin, he loves her more than anything, more than she deserves, but still, he gives her everything and more and she counts her lucky stars, counts them every day, that she found him.  

 

“I love you so much. So much more than I deserve to. You’re too good to me.” And as much as she tries to smile and be strong for him, her tears betray her as they spring to her eyes. 

 

“Of course, you silly girl. I love you. You and our little girl, you two are my everything.” 

 

___________________

 

“Are you ready?” So says, walking into the room, he watches as Hajin twist her hair into an elaborate do. 

 

Hajin takes a quick glance at So’s reflection in the mirror and decides once and for all that she’ll be strong and she’ll be brave and that she’ll be the best wife she can possibly be. She can see how So hides his own pain away to tend to her wounds and how his heart aches every time she hurts. 

 

“Almost. Can you put this in for me?” Hajin says, holding up the hairpin. So takes the pin in his hand and delicately slips it into the thick braid and secures it. 

 

“You’re really going to wear it?” 

 

“Of course! I love it. Why wouldn’t I wear it?” 

 

“I just- Nothing. Let’s get going!” He gives her his hand and helps her up. 

 

“You don’t have to baby me you know.” Hajin says to So who says nothing and keeps walking.

 

“I’m okay. Really, I’m okay. Everything will be alright as long as you’re here by my side. This baby will be ok too because she’ll have the best dad in the entire world. Don’t try to take on everything by yourself, you dummy. We’re in this together.” Hajin continues, but still So says nothing and she wishes that she was strong enough for the both of them. 

 

“It’s snowing!” Hajin yelps, untangling their fingers and running towards the grand windows that overlook the city. She looks out the window in wonderment, like a child seeing snow for the first time. She watches the snowflakes breeze through the sky in a flurry before landing on the ground like it’s the most magical thing in the world and So watches her like she’s the most magical thing in the world. 

 

___________________

 

When Baekah had called So and asked him to come out and meet his girlfriend, he needed no convincing. He pounced on the chance to see the girl who had actually gotten his brother to commit and settle down, now that was a sight to see. 

 

He walked through the streets that he and his friends used to haunt a mere six months ago and he suddenly felt so old. All the college kids and couples walking through the street, immersed in their conversations and he suddenly felt that he didn’t belong, but he still easily made his way to the chicken shop that he used to frequent. 

 

“Welcome! Oh, it’s you! Long time no see, how are you, son.”  The elderly owner of the chicken shop said, ushering him into the small store. 

 

“Miss. Lee! Still as youthful as ever! How are you?” So says, giving her a hug.

 

“Good. I miss seeing your handsome face.”  She says, winking, 

 

“Oh Miss. Lee, you flatter me. Be careful, I might steal you away from Mr. Lee.” So replies with a wink of his own. 

 

“Hyung!” So looks over to the sight of Baekah waving his hand furiously from their regular table, his clings to a girl his age, she’s pretty and So knows that she must be Woohee, the girl that his brother couldn’t stop gushing about.  

 

He doesn’t think much of the dark haired girl at the table who has her back turned to him until she turns to face him. The sight of her literally sends chills down his spine. Her face captivates him. It’s like he has tunnel vision and all he can see is her. While she’s certainly pretty, she isn’t such a great beauty that her beauty would put him at a loss of words, but something about her face feels so familiar to him, and every single one of her delicate features are ingrained in his lead, like he’s admired it a million times before, like he’s spent long nights watching her and admiring her while she slept but he knows for a fact that they’ve never met. He would remember this feeling.

 

So isn’t one to believe in soulmates or fate but the ache in his heart leads him to believe that she’s special and he knows for a fact that somehow, some time, she’ll turn his world upside down. 

 

Maybe in his last life, she was someone special to him and that’s why his heart aches and races at the sight of her and why he can’t look away and why he wants for nothing more than to get to know her. 

 

He approaches the table and the niceties and introductions are all a blur to him and like a school boy trying to approach the prettiest girl in school, he is giddy and he can’t help but want to look at this girl that has his heart racing and his palms clammy. But yet, he feels brazen, a need to impress a girl whose name he has yet to learn but somehow already has the contours of her face memorized. 

 

“Hyung, hurry up, I’m hungry.” Baekah whines like a little kid.

 

“Tsk-tsk. Where are your manners, Wang Baekah? Aren’t you going to introduce us after you brought us all here?” 

 

“Oh right. Guys, this is my eldest brother, Wang So. He’s my favourite brother so that’s why he’s the first to meet you, Woohee. But don’t tell the others, hyung, they’ll kill me. And this is my girlfriend, Woohee and our friend, Hajin.” 

 

“Too late, er, you admitted it so you bet your that I’ll be lording this over Eun’s head till we turn old and grey, and nice to meet you all. Woohee, nice to finally meet you. You’re far too pretty to be dating my little brother. Be careful Baekah, you better treat you well or she’ll easily find someone better.” So adds with a cheeky wink.

 

“Did you hear that? Take notes.”  Woohee snickers. 

 

“Hyung!” 

 

“Hey, I’m just saying. And nice to meet you, I’m Wang So.” So says, turning to the girl who is still yet to be identified. 

 

“Hi, there, Baekah’s elusive brother. How do you do? I’m Go Hajin.” The girl says, turning so that they are face to face. She extends her hand towards his, initiating a handshake. 

 

Hajin. A pretty name. It suits her, but somehow, he was expecting something different, something mono syllabic. 

 

“Nice to meet you, Miss Go Hajin. How did you get roped into this, also, elusive?” So replies, shaking her hand. He can’t help but notice that her small hands are nice and soft and how he likes the sensation of her slender fingers wrapped around his hand. 

 

“Well, Woohee and I are supposed to be best friends but boy oh boy do I feel like a third wheel  right now. And yes, elusive. You’ve cancelled on use so many times but don’t worry Baekah made sure to tell us everything about you. I promise I won’t tell anybody that you’re an INFINITE fanboy and that your house is practically a shrine to them though. Your secret is safe with me.”  Hajin replies with a wink of her own.

 

“Oh thank god, thank you so much. I don’t know what I would do if anybody found out I’m an L fanboy.”  So replies, holding his chest in feigned relief. 

 

He finds himself laughing along with her at something that isn’t all that funny but he likes how her eyes crinkle when she laughs and how she throws her head back and puts her into body into it. They’re in their own little world for just a second. 

But when they return to earth Baekah and Woohee are still preoccupied with each other and pay them no mind.

 

“So, Miss. Go Hajin, how did you meet these two?” 

 

“Well I met Woohee in first year at an arts festival and we met Baek through a fundraiser this year.”

“Oh, so are you an modern dance major too?” 

 

“Me? No way. Not with my two left feet. I’m a Korean history major.” Hajin chortles. 

 

“History? Really?” 

 

“Sounds boring, I know, but I really enjoy it. I love learning about figures who were people just like us but seemed to live such interesting lives and survived so much. It’s crazy that people actually lived these lives and in history, you can bring it alive again, continue someone’s legacy, tell a great story.” 

 

“No, no that’s now what I meant. It’s just that I imagine an old man with dusty elbow patches when I think of history, not pretty girls.” So replies and hopes that it’s not too brazen. 

 

“Smooth.” Hajin replies, eyes crinkling as she smiles. 

 

“Tell me your favourite story in  history. Think carefully, I won’t accept any second rate stories.” 

 

“Hmm.” Hajin thinks for a second and at risk of sounding creepy, he thinks she's beautiful when she thinks long and hard like this. Her brows are furrowed as she thinks and So is happy that she takes her request to heart. 

 

“I got it! My favourite story would be the story of Gwangjong, the fourth king of Goryeo. His nickname was wolf-dog, which is quite sad and apparently quite inaccurate because he was supposedly very handsome. But he was the son of the first king of Goryeo, Taejo, and Queen Shinmyeongsunseong and was the adoptive son of one of the most powerful clans in the country but despite that, he had a very hard and abusive childhood but despite the odds, he worked his way up and with his wits and brains he became a great king, possibly one of the greatest kings in the entire dynasty. But the romantic in me also loves how he apparently loved a noble lady turned court lady since he was seventeen and she was the only woman he ever loved. Their love story was famous in the palace and she was meant to be his queen when he became the king, but there were too many complications and she died not long after. But they were the very definition of star crossed lovers and they just couldn’t catch a break.” 

 

Hajin purses her lips at the story of a king and his starcrossed lover and he feels as though he’s heard this story before even though he’s never cared for history very much. Maybe he saw it in a drama. 

 

“Oh! And did you know his name was also Wang So! And he had a brother whose nickname was Baekah. Your parents must’ve really liked the Goryeo era.” 

 

The two talk for hours about nothing in particular but he finds himself catching on to her every word. It’s not that he has suddenly fallen in love with her and he’s not even sure that he’s interested in her but he just wants to spend time with her and be by her side. He knows that she’s special and that he doesn’t want to lose her again. Wait what. Not again, how could he have lost her when they’ve just met. 

 

But she feels so familiar and warm and he enjoys himself talking to her about absolutely mundane things and laughing it at like it’s the best joke in the world and he just wants to talk to her. 

 

“Guys! Let’s go! The subway is going to stop running soon.” Baek yells, clapping his hands like a seal in front of his face. Both him and Hajin snap out of their trance like state. 

 

“Hyung, can you walk with Hajin to the station? She lives on Euljiro too.” Baekah asks politely, more polite than he’s ever been and he’s secretly glad that he can say goodbye to Hajin on his own terms so he nods and they walk out of the the chicken shop together and he hugs his brother goodbye. 

 

“Bye Woohee! It was nice meeting you. And Baek, text me tomorrow.” 

 

“Bye guys. See you monday.” Hajin says, waving goodbye and shivering from the cold winter breeze. 

 

“Ok, we’re going to go before Hajin turns into a human popsicle.” 

 

They part ways and him and Hajin walk side by side towards the station. 

 

“You and Baek seem really close.” Hajin says as they walk through the still busy streets. 

 

“We are. He’s a good kid.” 

 

“I know. Let’s take the shortcut through the sports quad- ahchoo” 

 

“Tsk-tsk. Here.” So unravels his scarf from his neck and turns to Hajin, looping the thick scarf around her neck before she has time to protest. Her round eyes greet him when he looks up after securing the scarf and she says nothing. She’s the one to break the gaze as she walks off ahead. 

 

“Thanks for the scarf, it’s so cold!” Hajin jogs through campus, running across the track until she stops in front of the bleachers on the soccer field. So trails behind her slowly because he can sense that she wants space. 

 

“Hold on. Can we take a quick break? I’m winded.” Hajin leans against the bleachers and So walks over and takes a seat on the bleachers and they share in a comfortable silence. 

 

“It’s snowing.” Hajin yells. So looks up to the sight of glittering flakes of snow falling onto them and then to Hajin who’s like a kid who’s experiencing snow for the first time. She looks at the sky in amazement and sticks her palm out and watches as the flakes fall into her palm and dissolve into nothing. She watches the snow and So watches her and he’s sure. He knows. 

“So?” Hajin says, eyes still glued to the falling snowflakes. 

 

“Yes?” So replies. 

 

Quicker than the speed of light, Hajin turns toward him and before he knows it, they’re face to face, mere inches apart. 

 

“I’m going to kiss you.” Hajin wraps her arms around his neck and he’s so shocked that he forgets to respond for a second but he snaps out of it soon and nods. 

___________________

 

“Why did you kiss me that day? On the bleachers?” 

 

“What? I don't know. I liked you and they say that you’re supposed to confess during the first snow of the season and it just felt… right.” 

 

“I know we still have a little while to go but what do you think of the name “Seol”?” 

 

“Seol, like the first snow of the season? Seol… Seol… I love it.” 

 

“Really?” 

 

“Yes, it’s perfect. She’ll be perfect. She’ll be fine. Everything will be fine.”