I sat on a bench at a park near my apartment.My eyes were fixed on my laptop’s screen as I was busy reading online comic.The story that I read was ‘So I Married An Anti-Fan’.While I was focusing on my reading,someone approached me.

Chanyeol: Hye,my sweet little friend.What are you doing here by your own?

I : Oh..Chan-ah..I’m reading comic here.My apartment is too loud for me to read it.So,I came here to read in peace.

Chanyeol: Owh...What kind of story?Can I read it with you? *seatbesideme*

I : Sure,you can,but I can’t ensure that you will like this kind of love story though. *laugh*

Chanyeol: It’s okay..If you like this story,I’m sure that I will like it too.. *smile*

I only nodded and continue my reading.Chanyeol leaned at me and read the story with me.But...I can’t focused on my reading as my heart was thumping 1 thrillion time per minute.

I : Chan-ah!Do you want some juice?I want to buy it at the vending machine.

Chanyeol: Juice?I will go and buy it for you instead. *stand up*

I : It’s okay,Chan-ah.I will go buy it myself. *push him to sit*

Chanyeol: Okay..Mango juice please..

I : Roger..Wait for awhile,kay?

I ran as fast as I could to the vending machine that located near children swings..I felt so confused,embarrassed..and..arghh!Too many feelings to describe.As soon as I reached my destination,I put in coins that I brought and chose juice that Chanyeol and I want.After I got my juice,I went back to the bench and saw Chanyeol was talking with someone that I really know.

I : Joong ki oppa!! *run and hug Joongki* I miss you so much!

Joong ki: I miss you too..How long it have been since I last met you... *rubbing my head*

I : *laugh* It’s 5 years ago.When I’m still sixteen..

Joong ki: Oh..I remember..You cried a lot when Jihyo noona and I went to Seoul..

I : Hey..I’m not crying..There’s too many dust in my eyes *pinch Joong ki’s cheeks*

Joong ki: *laugh and pinch my cheeks too*

Chanyeol: Ehem..How could you two leave me aside..Huh..I felt so sad.. *pretend to sulk*

I : Don’t sulk,Chan-ah..Here’s your juice..

Joong ki: Chanyeol-ah..It’s not gentleman,you know..

Chanyeol: I’m just joking,hyung...

Joong ki and I : *laugh happily*

 

 

 

*bell ringing*

I went to open the door.I felt so excited when I saw Jihyo unnie stood in front of me while smiling brightly.

I : Unnie!!! *hug Jihyo*

Jihyo: Yeodongsaeng-ah!!I really really really miss you!

I : Me too!Come in,unnie..We can talk more inside.

Jihyo: I would like to but I must go and meet my friend.Actually,I came here to invite you to the party at my house.Joong ki and I want to celebrate our happiness because we can transfer here again.

I : Jinjja?When?I’ll surely come.

Jihyo: Tonight..Around 8 pm..

I : Roger..I’ll surely arrive before 8

Jihyo: That’s my dongsaeng..Then,I’ll get going now..Remember to bring Chanyeol along tonight.

 

 

 

That night,I walked to Jihyo unnie’s house with Chanyeol.We didn’t talked much as an embarrassing incident had happened when I went to fetch Chanyeol at his apartment.

Chanyeol: Chingu-ah...You still mad at me?

I : You think?

Chanyeol: Please don’t be mad at me..I’m sorry about earlier..I just want to save you from falling.

I : How can I can’t be mad at you?If you don’t pull me back then,I will never fell on you and your sister will never mistaken us doing R-rated scene.

Chanyeol: I’m sorry,kay..I’ll explain it to my sister later. *making cute face*

I : *look at Chanyeol* Huh..Okay..I forgive you..But..Don’t do it again,kay.

Chanyeol: *smile happily and hug me* Gomawo..

I :Yah..Chan-ah.. *try to push Chanyeol* What will Jihyo unnie say if she see us..

Chanyeol: It’s okay.We’re not doing anything bad.It just ordinary for a friend to hug his best friend..

Suddenly....

Jihyo : Wah!!Youngster couple..So sweet~*giggled*

Joong ki: Yea...Sure... *look unpleasant*

I : No,we’re not *escape from Chanyeol’s hug* You’re just imagining things,unnie,oppa..

Chanyeol: Ouch..It hurts...It felt almost the same when someone dumped you. *put his hand near his heart*

I : Yes,you are. *grab Jihyo’s hand and went in the house*

Joong ki: It’s alright,Chanyeol-ah..I know your feeling.. *rub Chanyeol’s back*

Chanyeol: It’s okay,hyung..It’s okay if she dumped me..That’s the best decision she ever make if she really dump me.. *smile sadly*

 

 

 

Sunday,
I woke up from my sleep right after my alarm clock start ringing.I stretched out to straighten my back..Ah..It’s good to wake up early in the morning.I quickly rose up from my bed and went to the sink in my bathroom.I brushed my teeth and washed my face.Then,I went to the wardrobe and changed my pyjama into tracksuit.I tied up my hair into a bun and went for a jog at the park.When I was jogging,Chanyeol came out of nowhere and talked to me.I,who was busy singing Monster,was so surprised.

I : Chan-ah..If you don’t want me to die early,please don’t surprise me like that.I might get a heart attack if you do it everyday.

Chanyeol: *laugh* I love to see your surprised face..It’s too cute..

I : Well,I know I’m pretty..You don’t need to tell that.

Chanyeol: Aye~You’re too full of yourself..

Chanyeol & I : *laugh*

Chanyeol: Hmm..Are you free today?Let’s go to amusement park.My sister gave me many coupons.

I : Yeay!Let’s go!I’m free today.

Chanyeol:Good!Then,we’ll meet up in front of amusement park’s entrance at 1 pm.

I : Roger!

 

 

 

I stood in front of my wardrobe and took out all my gorgeous dresses.I put it on my bed and tried out every single of them.I don’t know why I’m doing this.Everytime I went out with Chanyeol,I would always wore simple attire but this time,it’s different.After the incident that happened a few weeks before holiday,I started to feel strange when I’m with Chanyeol.I didn’t understood this strange feeling...

I : Chan-ah,why did you tease my feeling like this..I’m so confused right now.

 

~A few weeks ago~

I walked out from study hall after helping my lecturer arranging his worksheets.I walked in front of Art & Music Department to go to the cafe.Suddenly,I heard Chanyeol’s voice.I followed the voice and saw Chanyeol with university’s most beautiful freshman,Seolhyun.I hide behind the wall and heard their conversation.

Chanyeol: What do you want to tell me,Seolhyun-ah?

Seolhyun: I...err..I like you,Chanyeol oppa.Let me be your yeoja-chingu.

Chanyeol: *looks at me* I’m sorry but you can’t be my yeoja-chingu. *walks towards me and pulls me with him* My yeoja-chingu is her..

I : *stares at Chanyeol*

Seolhyun: What?!This nerd is your yeoja-chingu?!Please don’t pulls my leg,Chanyeol oppa..

I : *stares at Seolhyun and mumbles slowly* Nerd?

Chanyeol: Well,she’s my pretty,nerdy yeoja-chingu.

Then,Chanyeol pulled me and kissed my lips intensely.My eyes widened and my heart was beating fastly,as fast as the light..Seolhyun who stood in front of us covered as she was so shocked.She ran away from that place.She cried hurtly.Chanyeol released me after Seolhyun went away.I looked at Chanyeol with stirred feelings.

I : Why did you do that?

Chanyeol: I’m sorry....

I : That’s my first kiss...

Chanyeol: I’m sorry..

I : *lost my cool* Just stop apologizing,you...ergh!

I ran away from Chanyeol and didn’t talked to him for about 3 days..But,I can’t be apart with Chanyeol for a long time as we had been together since middle school.In the end,I’m the one who started talking with Chanyeol.I still remembered his happy face when I talked to him.

 

 

 

Chanyeol sat on his bed while holding his phone.He his phone called Joong ki’s number.

Chanyeol: Yoboseyo,hyung...

Joong ki: Oh,Chanyeol-ah..What’s up?

Chanyeol: Can you accompany [Y/N] to amusement park at 1 pm?I have an urgent business after this.

Joong ki: Um,sure..I can..

Chanyeol: Thank you,hyung..Can you get amusement park’s coupons at my house,please?With these,you can get more tickets for free..

Joong ki: Okay...

Chanyeol: Thank you again,hyung...

Chanyeol put off his phone on the table beside his bed.He sighed heavily.Suddenly,he felt a sharp pain attacked his heart..He put his hand on his chest.He quickly took his medicine and drank it with mineral water that he put on the table..He looked hurt.

Chanyeol:  [Y/N]-ah..Mianhae..

        

 

I waited for Chanyeol in front of the amusement park patiently.I wore black and pink dress with a pair of wedgeheel that Chanyeol bought last year as my birthday present.I looked around to search for Chanyeol.Suddenly,Joong ki oppa appeared in front of me.

Joong ki: Hye..

I : Hye,oppa..What are you doing here?

Joong ki: Err..Chanyeol ask me to come here.

I : Owh..Then,where is Chanyeol?

Joong ki: I’m sorry [Y/N]-ah..Actually,Chanyeol ask me to come here for him instead.He can’t come because he have an urgent business to do.

I : Eh? *suddenly,my phone ring* *turn on my phone*

      -I’m sorry,[Y/N]-ah.I can’t accompany you to the amusement park.I have to visit

               my sick uncle at the hospital.Please enjoy yourself with hyung-

                                                                                                    Chanyeol

I gripped my phone tightly.I felt so dissapointed because I can’t went to the amusement park with Chanyeol and was mad because he didn’t tell me about his sick uncle earlier.If I know it,I would cancel our promise..But I can’t blame everything on him.Maybe he asked Joong ki oppa to accompany so that I would not be blue.I looked at Joong ki that stood in front of me.

I : Well,I have know the reason now.Let’s go.He tell me to enjoy myself.

Joong ki: Let’s go!

Joong ki and I went into the amusement park..but..I don’t realized that Chanyeol was lying.Actually,he was tailing me and Joong ki.It looked like that he was plotting something behind my back.

                                                                                        

 

After I parted ways with Joong ki oppa,I quickly went to Chanyeol’s apartment which is just one floor below my apartment.I pushed the bell.After a few seconds,someone opened the door.

I : Yoora unnie..Is Chanyeol home yet?

Yoora: [Y/N]-ah..Come in..Yea,he’s home.He is resting in his room.

I : Thank you..Then,sorry for interrupting. *go into the house and walk to Chanyeol’s room* Chan-ah!!!

Chanyeol: [Y/N]-ah...What are you doing here? *shocked*

I : Nothing...I just want to meet you.. *sat on a chair*

Chanyeol: *smile* Well,how’s your date?Did anything happened?

I : It’s not a date..You’re the one who asked Joong ki oppa to replace you to the amusement park..You can just cancel it if you have business.

Chanyeol: Sorry..I just don’t want to dissapoint you..

I : You don’t need to do that..It’s dissapointing me more if you are not the one who accompany me...

Chanyeol: *smile sadly* Did anything happened?

I : Eh?Err.. *blush*

Chanyeol: Hoh,looking at your face reaction,something happened right?

I : It’s...err...J..joong ki oppa confessed to me..

Chanyeol: *look at me* Then?

I : Then what?D..don’t be ridiculous..No..nothing happened after that...

Chanyeol:Aye,don’t lie.Your face tells everything..

I : Urghh...Okay...I will tell you...Actually,oppa...kissed me..

Chanyeol: Wow!Hyung is really brave..

I : It’s nothing,you idiot...Eventhough he confessed and kissed me,I still didn’t give him my answer yet..I’m still confused..

Chanyeol: Why?Don’t you like hyung?You should take this opportunity..

I : That was a long time ago..I..like someone else.. *look at Chanyeol*

Chanyeol: Jinjja?Who?

I : Urm..I can’t tell you right now..One day,you will know him...

Chanyeol: Okay...But,I hope that person is someone that I know.I don’t want to see you with strangers.

I : *laugh* You know him well,Chan-ah...

 

 

 

 

 

A week later.....

I walked in the apartment’s compound after went to the library to search for info to finish my holiday’s assignment..Then,I saw Yoora unnie was distributing things to the residents.I went near her and talked to her.

I : Unnie..What are you doing?

Yoora: Ah..[Y/N]-ah..I’m just giving things from my apartment to the residents..Want some?

I : *looking into the things* Why did you do this,unnie?

Yoora: Don’t you know,[Y/N]-ah..Chanyeol and I will move out from this apartment tomorrow.Chanyeol didn’t tell you?

I : Eh?When?

Yoora: Tomorrow... *look at me* Tell me,[Y/N]-ah..Is Chanyeol didn’t tell you about this?

I : *shook my head* W..where is Chanyeol? *uneasy*

Yoora: I think he’s at the park right now.

I : Kamsahamnida,unnie.. *quickly run to the park*

I ran as fast as I can to the park.The park which is usually felt near to me became too far even when I was running.My heart cried for Chanyeol..Please don’t go yet!!How can he didn’t tell me this important thing.If I didn’t ran into Yoora unnie,I would never knew about this and I would never have a chance to tell him my true feeling..

As soon as I reached to the park,I searched everywhere for him restlessly..Luckily,I saw Chanyeol sitting on a bench under a cherry tree..

I : Chanyeol-ah!!

Chanyeol: [Y/N]-ah...How rare for you to call my full name..

I : *hug Chanyeol* Why didn’t you tell me that you will move out tomorrow?Why?

Chanyeol: I...just don’t want you to know... *push me*

I : Why?Because of that,I almost lose my chance to tell you my honest feeling..

Chanyeol: Eh?Feeling?What do you mean?

I : The one that I like is you,Chan-ah..I love you!!I..I start to love you when I realize that you always treat me kindly eventhough I always treated you coldly..That personality of you attracts me to love you...I....I...

Chanyeol: Hajima,[Y/N]-ah..Please...Don’t talk more..I don’t want to hear anymore... *cover his face with his hand* I...I’m sorry,[Y/N]-ah...I...don’t like you...Not even a little...

I : *shocked* But..that time...you said to Seolhyun...

Chanyeol: That was just a lie to save me from her..I don’t even have any feeling for you...

I : That kiss...too? *touch my lip*

Chanyeol : *sigh* Yes...That’s a lie too..It’s just an acting to add impact in my lie...So,[Y/N]-ah...Please..stop loving me...

Chanyeol went away from that place right after he finished his words.I only stood there without stopping him..I couldn’t because...tears have rolled down my cheeks.Too many of them that I can barely see anything.I sat on the bench and cried hardly.My heart had broken into pieces.Suddenly,it started to rain.The heart-broken me walked hopelessly..Then,without realizing,I arrived in front of Joong ki’s house.I rang the bell.A few seconds later,the door opened and Joong ki appeared.I looked at him sadly and cried so hard that I got hiccups.

I : Oppa...Why did he hurt me?Did I do..anything wrong to him?

Joong ki: Who are you talking about,[Y/N]-ah..

I : Chanyeol....I..thought that he also love me..but..he’s just playing with heart...Why?

Joong ki: It’s okay,[Y/N]-ah...I’m here for you..I’ll make sure that you will not be blue.. *hug me*

I : Emm.. *hug Joong ki back*

 

 

 

Tomorrow,at the airport...

I just kept my mouth shut when I sent Chanyeol and Yoora unnie at the airport..Yoora unnie said that they were going to Japan as Yoora got work’s promotion there.When I was daydreaming,Chanyeol talked to me..

Chanyeol: Chingu-ah...I hope you will always be happy even without me by your side..Hope we can always be best friend forever..

I : *restless* O..okay,Chan-ah..I will surely miss you...Please don’t forget to contact me later..

Chanyeol: Yeah..I will contact you if I’m not busy with my assignment..I heard that my new university love to burden student with assignments.

I : *fake laugh*Don’t get stress,kay...

Chanyeol: Okay...Well then,I’ll go now..Bye,my true friend...

I : Bye-bye..Have a safe trip.

I waved my hand to Chanyeol while smiling hurtly..It’s too hurt,Chan-ah..I can’t keep acting like this..Chan-ah,don’t leave me..That’s what I really want to tell you...But..I can’t..I don’t wanted him to hate me.He had said before that he didn’t love me..I don’t want to hear he said that he hated me so,I would just tried to forget him no matter what because this kind of love would never succeeded.

I looked at Chanyeol who were going away from me with sad eyes..Suddenly,I saw Joong ki oppa giving something to Chanyeol..What did he gave to Chanyeol?Farewell gift...Maybe..

 

 

A year later...

I was busy finishing my assignment at public library.I must submitted it before summer vacation.If not,I would got a penalty and had to attend extra classes during vacation and it’s the most  thing that I hate in my life..Studying while the others were having fun..No,no,no...I’ll never let it happen..

Suddenly,my phone rang loudly.I switched on my phone and checked a message that I got from an unknown number.

                       -[Y/N]-ah,please go to the beach immediately-

                                                                       Chanyeol

After reading the message,I quickly tidied up my books and laptop and rushly went to the beach near my apartment.Why did I’m rushing there?Did I forgot that Chanyeol had rejected me before?Why?Why all this feeling kept stirring up my mind?I  don’t understand..

Around 10 minutes later,I reached at the beach.I saw Chanyeol was standing by the beachside.I quickly got to him.

I : Chan-ah!!

Chanyeol: *look at me* [Y/N]-ah...I miss you... *hug me*

I : Chan-ah...You’re acting weird..Are you okay?

Chanyeol: [Y/N]-ah..Mianhae...Jeongmal mianhae..Eventhough your feeling for me is true,I still hurt you..Eventhough you...

I : Wait,wait,wait..What are you talking about,Chan-ah?I can’t understand.

Chanyeol: Last year,when I’m going to Japan,hyung had gave me a letter that contained your feeling that you wrote on the day I rejected you..That letter really make me guiilty because I had hurted you..I want to apologize and confirm each other feelings once again..That’s why,I ran away from my treatment...and come here to meet you..

I : *touched* Chan-ah...It’s okay..I forgive you..I’m not hurt anymore.. * Chanyeol’s head* But.Can you tell me more about your treatment..I don’t know anything about it..

Chanyeol: *release his embrace* Actually,I..have a chronic heart disease..I need to take daily treatment to prevent it from getting bad..I rejected you that time because of this illness.

I : But..Why didn’t you tell me earlier?We’re friends,right?Did you think that I will left you if you tell me about your illness?

Chanyeol: I can’t tell you....I can’t..because...I..I love you... *put his hands on my shoulders and kiss me sincerely* Sa..saranghae...Neomu saranghae..

I : *surprised* Eh?You..love me?

Chanyeol: When I said that I don’t like you that time..It was all lie..I love you but I can’t said it...I can’t live longer anymore..My disease has reached its 3rd stage..I’m afraid that you can’t move on from me if I die one day.

I : *hug Chanyeol* You stupid..Why didn’t you said that earlier?Nado saranghaeyo..Even if you has a heart disease..Even if you can’t love me right....Even if you’re gone from this world..I’ll always love you forever..*cry*

Chanyeol: Is that so?What a relief...It seems that..I can go from this world...urgh...without any regret.. *collapse in my hug*

I : Chan-ah..Yah,Chanyeol-ah...Jebal...Tteonajima...Chanyeol-ah..Chanyeol-ah!!! *cry while hugging Chanyeol’s body.

 

 

 

 

 

 

6 years later...

I sat on a chair at the balcony while looking at the scenery in front of me.I can hear my children’s voice talking happily at the backyard.I stood up and went to my children.

I : Sungyeol-ah..Junghwa-ah..What are you two playing?

Sungyeol & Junghwa: We’re playing pretend as a doctor and nurse who want to save a patient..

I : Ah~Who is the doctor?

Sungyeol: I’m the doctor..Junghwa plays the role as my nurse.

I : *smile* Then,who is the patient?

Junghwa: Lily is the patient *point at a doll*

I : What is her disease?Can I know?

Junghwa: Sure..She has a weak heart..

I : Aaahh...Poor her..That is really bad..

Sungyeol: Don’t worry,eomma..I,as the most awesome cardiologist will surely cure her.

I : *smile happily* That’s my boy...

Someone: Hey,what all of you doing here?Can I join too? *happily*

I :Ah,yeobo..Our children were playing pretending just now..

Sungyeol: Yes!I’m pretending as a cardiologist because when I grow up,I want to be a talented cardiologist and cure everyone whom have uncure heart diseases so that they can live happily with their loved one.

Junghwa: I pretend as a nurse because when I grow up,I want to help and take a good care of anyone who are sick.

Someone: *kneel on the ground* That’s really ambitious..I’m Park Chanyeol,really proud of my little children. *hug both Sungyeol and Junghwa*

I : Aye..It’s not fair..Eomma want a hug too...

Chanyeol:Okay...Here’s a big hug for you.. *hug me*

I laughed happily.I felt so happy right now because I can live my life with my precious one.On that day,when Chanyeol collapsed on me,Yoora unnie who was tailing Chanyeol had called fo ambulance earlier because she worried that Chanyeol would collapsed..And..Because of that,the doctor managed to save Chanyeol’s life...Eventhough,chance of Chanyeol to be alive was 50/50 but I believed that God would surely helped him..I felt so thankful that God had helped him.

Chanyeol: Jagi-ah..Were you daydreaming?

I : Eh..No..I’m just thinking of something..

Chanyeol: Can you fix me a meal?I feel so hungry right now..

I : Ne..Sungyeol-ah..Junghwa-ah..Please play here quietly,kay?Don’t go anywhere or else Bigbear will eat you... *evil laugh*

Sungyeol& Junghwa: Ne,eomma!

Chanyeol: You sure like to tease them,huh? *follow me to the kitchen*

I: *laugh* Well,it’s me after all.

Chanyeol: *laugh* Well,you’re my wife,after all..

I : What do you want to eat,yeobo?Is curry okay?

Chanyeol: Anything is okay if you’re the one who cook it.. *hug me from the back*

I : You’re too sweet,yeobo..

Chanyeol: Jagi-ah..

I : Hmm...What is it?

Chanyeol: Saranghae...

I : Nado saranghae..