The biggest lie we tell ourselves is that we're fine. Jongin is one of those people who hate to show vulnerability and basically any kind of negative emotion. He's one of the purest, happiest humans in the whole world, but once he's hurt he closes in front of everyone and hides in his shell. He'll never admit something's wrong and can pretend he's totally fine for days, but when he finally cracks it's the saddest, most heartbreaking sight anyone can see. It's a cold afternoon when one of these moments appears;

See, it's only a month before one of the biggest kpop-boy-group's anticipated by practically every teenage girl (and some boys) in South Korea. The twelve members have a lot of pressure and responsibility on their shoulders. Their schedules filled with dance practices, vocal rehearsals, more dance practices and guess what? Yeah, more vocal rehearsals because they can't even think about messing something up. Jongin feels like something bad is going to happen for a few days now. He realizes he caught a cold when he starts coughing and his nose is blocked to the point he has to breathe only from his mouth. "Jongin, are you ok?" Kyungsoo, one of his fellow hyungs asks him with concern in his eyes.

The younger smiles at him in reassurance. "Yeah, I'm ok. Thanks for asking, hyung." He says with a bit higher-pitched-voice.

The other furrows his eyebrows, obviously not convinced by the sweet smile on his face, but decides to let go of the subject for now. It goes like that for a few days; Jongin's flew get worse each and everyday. He tries to drink tea but it's not helping his coughing which start to appear a lot more and stronger too. Kyungsoo asks him once again if he's feeling good in one of their vocal rehearsals, and the younger nods with a pull of his nose.

 

The loud music pumps in Jongin's suddenly sensitive ears. He feels like Satan crawled from hell and hugged him tightly; his whole body is burning and he shivers lightly. His nose is still blocked, the coughs catch him unprepared and basically he feels like he's going to pass out in the next seconds. His vision starts to get blurry, eyelids suddenly heavy on his brown eyes. His fringe sticks to his forehead from sweat, but it doesn't make sense because they're only ten minutes into their dance practice. Someone bumps him from his left. "Jongin, move on!" he can't recognize the deep voice.

For a short second, it feels like the linoleum floor reaches out for a hug and he falls onto it. "Jongin!" Someone else calls, and he can see a glimpse of big round eyes before his vision goes black.

 

It's warm. That's the first thing Jongin indicates when he comes back into conscious. It's warm and cozy, and there's a really good scent in the air; something like chocolate and soup. Surprisingly, he feels his stomach growls. He's so hungry.

He opens one eye to meet the white ceiling, then, moving his head to his left, he recognizes a small figure. A small ball of fluffy dark ruffled hair rests on the bed on a strong pair of arms. His fingers touch lightly at the dark locks, ruffling them between them. His hand falls back to its place when Kyungsoo suddenly shots from his place, making Jongin smile weakly at his cute confused expression. "Good morning, hyung." He chuckles.

Kyungsoo's eyes return to their normal state, and then he recognizes something similar to tears in his eyes. But the room is dark and he's still burning, so maybe it's just his imagination.

Jongin freezes when the older suddenly jumps off his chair and leans forward to straddle him in some kind of a hug, head buried in his neck. "How many times did I tell you not to hide things from me?" he asks, tone soft and warm yet scolding.

"I'm sorry," he mumbles in return.

"I was so worried, Jongin. I asked you a few times, why couldn't you tell me you're not feeling well? Look what you've done to yourself, you silly." He almost sobs, fingers dig into his sides.

Jongin sighs. Of course he knows the older is right, but he doesn't want to worry him or get in the group's way with his stupid flew. "It's just a flew, Kyungsoo-"

"You passed out, you moron!" Kyungsoo suddenly jolts up from his chest, eyebrows furrowed in concern. If Jongin was feeling better he would probably hit him already. "Are you trying to kill me- us, with worry?" he gulps and adds right after, taking a small breath into his lungs. "I made you soup." Jongin's senses blur to the last words he said. Me. he said 'me'. The older tries to act like he didn't just make Jongin's heart flutter in the best way. He smiles lightly while moving into a sitting position on the bed. "Take that stupid smile off, I'm pissed at you if you didn't notice yet." He huffs adorably and takes a spoonful of soup.

"But I don't like-" his last words muffle into the spoon.

Kyungsoo smiles, a glimpse of sweet revenge glinting in his big eyes. "I made it especially for you, so eat it."

Jongin's lips pout around the metal utensil while he gulps the warm liquid. "Don't be mean." He murmurs.

Kyungsoo's expression softens somehow and he sighs. "Don't make me worry like that again, punk." He pokes lightly at his closed lips with the spoon, smiling warmly.

Jongin opens his mouth. "I'm sorry, hyung," he says and looks down at the bowl of soup.

Kyungsoo sighs in response, and ruffles his golden locks with a smile. "It's okay. But promise me you'll tell me next time, okay?"

Jongin nods, but the fast movement makes a sharp pain flow through his scalp and he's sure his head is going to explode. He lets out a pained gasp that makes Kyungsoo put the bowl aside. "What's wrong?" he asks with worry in his eyes.

"My head hurts." He whispers, not being able to raise his voice because his ears are so sensitive to everything right now, making the slightest knock on the door sound like in stereo.

Kyungsoo presses carefully his palm to his forehead. "You're still burning." He says and presses his plump lips. "I'll go get you a cold cloth, finish the soup until I'm back." He says and exits the room.

Jongin closes his eyes for only a second. He's so tired. He doesn't understand if he's more hot or cold, eyes squinting in concentration, only worsening his headache. He sighs in pain and coughs a bit. Minutes pass and he feels like everything's getting only worse. He's so into his thoughts that he doesn't even hear the door opens and closes. Kyungsoo sighs silently in the nth time this evening and puts the cold cloth on Jongin's forehead. "Rest well," he whispers and tucks the blanket around him.

"Hyung," Jongin gets to mumble sheepishly a second before the latter is gone. He hums in response. "Please stay," he opens one eye to look with pleading look at him.

Kyungsoo smiles softly and walks back to his place. "Ok."

"Can you sleep with me?" Jongin asks then shamelessly.

Kyungsoo's thick eyebrows shot upwards. "Uh-"

"It's okay if you don't want to." he mumbles in a low tone.

"Move your ." he pokes at his side, a faint smile on his lips.

Jongin smiles back immediately and moves closer to the wall, looking at his hyung with anticipation. He slips into the bed, head resting on the shared pillow and body stiffed a bit in nervousness. Jongin smiles at him and finally closes his eyes. "Good night, hyung." He mumbles while wrapping an arm around the older's shoulders.

Kyungsoo's eyes widen when the younger nudges closer to him, his heat radiating from his burning body. "G-Good night." He greets in response. 

---

Ah- carring Kyungsoo is life tbh<3 It's actually something I written a few weeks ago but didn't get to actually publish, so there you go lol.