'Ugh its just the fourth lesson'

I whispered to myself as the change of lesson bell rang out. Looking out the window from my seat, the very last seat almost a mile away from others.

why?

I like it like that or maybe my classmates made it like that. The different one, Busan boy,  country boy, stump, freak and many more were the nicknames I have acquired since I transferred here. 

Of course I was different, a different accent, a different outlook, a different appearance. I wasn't like the cool Seoul boys in my class, I wasn't as tall, as handsome, as shiny-haired, as outspoken. 

Therefore I had spent countless days trying, trying to be cool, trying to speak out, trying to change my accent, trying to sleek my fluffy bangs back with a lot of hair gel, trying to tuck out my white shirt of my grey pants...to no avail.

I couldn't be like them, couldn't speak like them, couldn't be cool like them, couldn't dress like them..I stopped because..

Now, I enjoy my own company and as a matter of fact, my nickname...Busan Boy.

 

'Hello class!"

The Korean traditional music teacher made an entrance in his usual high-pitched voice. I cringed but something caught my eye.

He had entered with another person. A tall young boy with a one-shoulder bag instead of a backpack, his black hair styled in a half part and he was in our uniform, short-sleeved white shirt and long grey pants.

'Guys, we've got a new student, he has just transferred here from Busan' The teacher interrupted my thoughts

My eyes brightened at the mention of Busan, my hometown.

'Say Hi to your friends' the teacher said as he placed one arm on the new student's shoulder

 

"Hi, my name is Jeon Jungkook from Busan High'

 

All I could hear around me were whispers of  'ooh handsome..ooh good-looking....so tall....omg god'

But my ears quickly blocked them out and my eyes widened when I heard him speak

'where was the accent?'

The accent, all Busan people especially guys were known and loved for their accents....but ..but his was missing. He sounded like he was born and bred in Seoul, not only that his appearance....his hair, visible muscles under his white shirt, his height, his style

' why does he blend so well with these Seoul guys?'

I questioned myself over and over again. I thought I had made a new friend in class but I guess not

He's clearly out of my league

 

'okay guys, its the lesson you have always looked forward to' the teacher grinned. The class groaned at his sarcastic comment.

'take out your chosen musical instrument and starting from the front seat, come out to the front ot the class and play a musical piece'

the class groaned even louder.

'20 percent of your final mark this semester!' he yelled, and that was enough to shut everyone up

He-the new student- had already found his seat beside a girl...of course, the most beautiful and the biggest bully in class. 

Yes, everyone sat in twos usually with their friends  ...

Did I mention that I sit alone, at the back of the class?

 

It was my turn to play my Gayageum, the most popular Korean traditional instrument oh and my expertise because I have learned how to play since I was 9 years old. 

'Neh'

I strutted from my seat to the front of the class amidst jeers from my classmates...while avoiding his- the new student's- serious gaze

'why was he staring?'

I cringed but lifted my shoulders in defiance as I sat facing the class placing the Gayageum on my lap.

I started slowly but surely. I could hear the 'Busan boy' chant die down as I captivated everyone with my rendition of the great freedom song Arirang.

Few heads started to move from the crowd as seen from the corner of my eyes but I never fully looked up so as not to lock eyes with -him.

"was I scared?'

I shook my head and concentrated on my instrument, even closing my eyes as my fingers caressed the strings, back and forth with a few hums of the song from the crowd my heart rate soared in pride.

'they love me...they are listening to me....they enjoy my presentation....they are not making fun of me..'

My heart danced, just as my fingers on the strings of the instrument, my head in the clouds, my foot tapping to the rhythm until my ecstasy was cut short by a loud laughter from the one person in the audience. I continued playing as my head was still in the cloud not fully present and taking note of my surrounding until the whole class joined in the laughter

'what's wrong? why are they pointing at me and laughing? why...why..why?

I looked down at my instrument and to my surprise found a loose string hanging up in the air. It had cut while I was playing, throwing me off-key and I had kept playing because my eyes were mostly closed and I must have been listening to the music in my head...they loved me, so I reveled in the rare moment.

One minute everyone was laughing and the teacher was calming them, the next moment I was dashing out through the door with my instrument. I didn't stop until I had reached the gym and thankfully, it was empty.

I sat in a corner breathing heavily as I processed what had just happened. It went from a very good performance to my head being in the clouds to my instrument damaging to being made fun of. I had lost my only chance to make friends in class, ruined -his- first impression of me and most importantly my grandmother's beloved Gayageum. Hot tears streamed down my face as I mentally hit myself.

'you unfortunate piece of ... .... ..'

I remained in the gym for the fifth and last lesson before lunch break. I couldn't bear to look my classmates in the eye, I knew they were going to make fun of me for the rest of the semester.

____________________________________________________________________________________________

I sneaked back into class to pick my lunch after making sure everyone had left for the cafeteria. I entered slowly into the room with my head down so even if there was someone in there our eyes wouldn't meet...no one was in there, I was sure until I bumped into something, something sturdy. I lifted my head slowly to look at who it was but I remembered I had spent the last hour crying and my eyes would look like so I put my head right back down and walked briskly to my seat without uttering a word.

I picked up my lunch and headed straight to the stairs that lead to the football field. I have only seen maybe two people eat lunch there and they weren't from my class. It has become my own private lunch area where no one bothers me and I'm alone with my thoughts. 

As I opened the back door leading outside, the warm but fresh breeze hit my face, suddenly everything smelled fresh, the grass, the rose bush by the walking path or maybe because I had just cried for an hour, my nostrils must be clear...in any case, I was glad to be away from my torture, to be alone again. I hummed Arirang as I walked to the stairs. I arrived there in no time and sat, smiling as I opened and separated the first two layers of my lunch box and set it on my lap. The fresh smell of rice and Kimchi stew filled my nose, curious about the last layer..and as I had expected, rolled eggs!! my favorite.

'That looks really good'

I heard a voice from behind me. I turned swiftly and it was him. My mouth immediately went dry. I swallowed hard as I tried to get up but he only held his arms out to me motioning me to remain seated. He positioned himself beside me, so close, so close I could see his sparkling eyes, his sharp jaw-line, his proportionate facial features, so close I could see a drop of sweat trickle down his neck. 

'its hot isn' it?'

He caught me staring. I swallowed and even harder when he started to his shirt. I looked away but thankfully he had something underneath

'ooh' 

I shot myself mentally as he revealed his tank-top, revealing his strong arms, broad shoulders, perfectly tanned skin. 

'was he enjoying this?'

'your food might get cold, you know'

'true' I replied and started eating, slowly as I kept watching him with a corner of eyes.

'you don't have lunch?' I managed to ask without looking at him

'I don't'

I picked up my lunch bag and brought out an extra spoon, handed it to him then placed my lunch on his lap. He smirked and cleared his throat.

'you want me to eat your lunch?'

It was our first close eye contact and I could have sworn I broke out in shivers in the 38 degrees weather. His focused, piercing gaze unarmed me as my knees felt weak, thank goodness I wasn't standing 'what is wrong with me?...what is this feeling?' I shook my head in defiance

'no, I'm just confused thats all'

'no?' he said.

'no, i don't mean no, I...I was just thinking about something, not you' I stuttered as I looked at the smirk he had managed to retain ever since he had sat beside me.

Without another word and to my utmost surprise, he dug in taking big spoonfuls of rice, kimchi stew. My mouth watered as I watched him eat and strangely felt a wave of satisfaction wash through me. I have never had a 2-minute conversation with a classmate not to speak of sharing my lunch. Tears welled up in my eyes and I quickly blinked them back before he noticed.

'I think I owe you dinner'

He said after eating all my lunch.

'tonight'

he continued, waiting for a reply but my brain had stopped working as usual. He just asked me out, he wants to spend time with me, he likes me? my eyes shot up at him.

'its okay if you're busy we can do it another day'

'yea, I have somewhere to go with family tonight' I said and instantly began to regret it. No matter how much I craved acceptance, I couldn't give up the Han River festival date with my family. It was the highlight of summer and the last festival of the summer.

'argh my life ' I groaned.

The bell rang and our short date came to an end. He sprung up and put his shirt back on. 

'thanks for lunch, I really enjoyed it'

I didn't reply 

'how are you going home today'

'bus' I replied

'I could drive you'

'you drive?' was the first thing that came to my head but I spilled out something else instead

'umm, its okay, I'll just take the bus'

He smiled and walked up the stairs then stopped abruptly

'It's the most times I've been rejected in a day...anyway thanks for lunch'

he smiled brightly, waved at me and turned around, running to class.

' i'm sorry..i don't mean to be a jerk, I just don't know how I'm feeling around you..I can't control myself and I don't even know you'  apologies filled my head as I walked back to class, slowly.

Thankfully no one paid attention to me when I entered the classroom as everyone was focused on the new student, they gathered around him asking him loads and loads of questions not noticing as I tiptoed to my seat.

I avoided eye contact with him for the rest of the day, I couldn't dare or bear to face him after rejecting him twice. I felt horrible.

Monday was going to be a different day.  I was happy it was the weekend, two days to forget my mistakes and him. He probably won't speak to me on monday but I was grateful for the little time we spent together at lunch, it would probably be the last time he would eat my food but even with my empty stomach, I was grateful in every way.

__________________________________________________________________________________

Later that evening, my family of 4 had traveled down to the Han river for the yearly festival of foods, traditional dances, and fireworks. The Han river was crowded with mostly couples who had come for the last event of the night-fireworks- usually they would hold hands and share a kiss as they watch. It wasn't almost as enjoyable as it was cringy with thousands of couples kissing at the same time. Of course, only a lame guy like me comes here with their mom, dad and younger sister.

I soon separated myself from my family for my own free time.

'get an ice cream for your sister will you?' my mom said as I turned to walk away

'sure'

'strawberry flavor' my13-year-old sister screamed

I slapped my earphones on as I found my way through the crowd. Everyone had stood still as it was starting to get dark and they were getting ready for the fireworks. I finally got to the ice cream vendor and got my sister one, I found my way back and handed it to her and left immediately, walking through the crowd, debating whether to go back to the ice cream vendor or just stand where I am to watch the fireworks. I decided on ice cream. it isn't my favorite but I wanted to keep busy. 

'ugh' I rolled my eyes at the long queue

'A chocolate chip cookie dough flavor please'  it was finally my turn

'Thank you' I said as he handed it to me.

I turned around and started to walk away without any destination in mind but stopped when I heard a familiar voice.

 

'Vanilla flavor please'

'thank you'

My feet refused to move as much as I wanted to sprint out of the vicinity. It was him, the new boy at school. what was he doing here?

'There you are'  he said like he's been looking for me or expecting me. I wanted to disappear.  I couldn't look him in the face, the fact that he wasn't mad made me even more intimidated.

He had changed his uniform and he looked even more gorgeous in his white oversized round neck shirt and 3-quarter tan khakis emphasizing his leg muscles. I swooned.

'Hi' I managed to say after summoning up the courage to look him in the eye.

'Hey'  he smiled brightly. 'what a pleasant surprise, i didn't expect to find you here'

 we walked around our fast melting ice creams as we talked..well he did most of the talking.

'so is your family here?' 

'yes' I replied.

'where are we going?' I asked as he led me further and further away from the crowd

'it's a secret'  he said as he ran ahead of me motioning me to come along as the firework show was due to start soon

'where?' I asked as I ran after him.

Soon we got to a slightly elevated area with lots of trees

'careful....crawl up carefully'  I didn't listen but did what he did. we both crawled up the small elevated ground and finally sat on a flat rock that marks the highest point of the little elevation. It was dark and no one was around. I looked down and could see everyone's head 'cool' I muttered

'right?, you can see the fireworks better here and its a little more private'

I smiled, suddenly aware of him being so close to him. I forced myself to concentrate on the soon to begin show. Silence ensued between us.

'You don't have to be sorry for what happened today and I really loved your Arirang rendition, it was really cool'  he said in Busan accent.

My eyes glistened with tears, do I finally have a friend? his accent too.. I squealed inside. 

'you are not crying right'  

I wiped my tears as they fell, to my surprise he reached out and wiped them from my chin. His soft touch made my skin tingle and I quickly pulled away. He smiled.

The fireworks had already started but I couldn't pay attention because of him. I watched but couldn't make anything out of it as my head was still spinning from his touch. I my ice cream as I tried to focus

'I like your flavor of ice cream' he said after I had stopped crying

'wanna try?' I asked offering him

'yea'  he replied as he brushed my hand away, the hand that had the ice cream in it. My eyes widened as he came closer.

'what..what..what is going on?'

next thing I knew his lips were on mine, nibbling on my lower lip...l debating what to do in my head, I stood still but his soft lips on mine drove me crazy, still I resisted but then his tongue was already begging for entrance, he cupped my face with his hands and then tucked my hair behind my ears for better access, my body tingled and I unwillingly gave him access, he swept in and met my tongue every drop of ice cream from it. I  let out  a low groan and kissed him back tasting every corner of his mouth, he tasted like vodka and strawberries, I buried my fingers into his fluffy hair and kissed him deeply.

'where's your ice cream?'  he asked after we separated

''I don't know' I chuckled