Review by meeno24315

A Letter to Oh Sehun
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Title [7/10]

                Your title is short and straight to the point. It simply states what your story is: a letter… to a person named Oh Sehun; it definitely has relevance to the story! I don’t have any particular problems about it, but I will have to dock points because it’s not creative. Really though, there isn’t anything bad with it!

Description and Foreword [6/10]

                There is not much in your description besides, very literally, a description of your two main characters. I actually think you’ve done well in presenting the facts for both of them. There are a couple of grammar mistakes (Ex. Has a very complicated family background) but they’re minor.

                Hmm… although you’re trying to go for simple and straightforward, I actually think that you’re offering a little too little in your description. There isn’t enough substance for readers to decide whether or not they want to continue reading. I suggest maybe at least the intro of the setting would help you!

Plot [10/15]

                I understand that your story is a oneshot and often that means a writer is not allowed to delve into a plot line a whole lot, but this time I think you tried to add too many elements. There was never enough time to really understand what was going on in this character’s life with Sehun. Right when things seems to be making sense, the situation would be over and we’re introduced to a new part of her life. So while there aren’t any gaping plot holes or parts that don’t make sense, I think you’ve moved a little too quickly in my opinion.  

                In terms of substance, until the end of the story we still are not given enough. It was simple with barely any which makes it slightly dull. It’s definitely not a bad plotline! But it is also a little typical – sort of what readers would expect in a typical gang-related story.

Character Development [4/10]

                Out of all the parts, I think character development is your weakest. I have no idea who your characters are.

                Sehun: some type of badb

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Comments

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RinaBelle #1
Chapter 2: Omg, that letter of her was so raw, true to its own and filled with so much of confidence for her to move on. I like that mentality. I wish there were Sehun’s POV.
pjnn24 #2
Chapter 2: This MUST have a sequel. Author-nim wrote it well.
silverysky #3
Chapter 2: Hi. I was so speechless and how I wish you could write about Sehun's point of view when he read this letter. Your story is awesome !
nishka #4
Chapter 1: I didn't expect it to be so extreme, to be honest. When you first read the titles you think to yourself, oh, it's another love letter. But it's not, not in the entire sense of the word. Maybe it's a bit about love too, but it gets twisted in the end. The experiences are horrible, but the end result kind of gives you hope that they didn't break the main character. It's unusual to see a woman in that kind of place, having that kind of empowerment and how it can all crumble in a split second because, well, she's a woman. It was for sure an interesting point of view.
eternal_exol_ot12 #5
Chapter 1: Omo no I feel so depressed now I would never kill a baby no matter if I was . I would actually thank God for giving me a miracle out of something so bad as
loveablelacy #6
Chapter 1: oh wow this was heartbreaking, would love to hear letter from sehun also!
superdupper #7
Chapter 1: Omo this is sad. You are so cruel oh sehun
superdupper #8
Oh sehun really suit for the playboy character
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