Minhyuk has long since given up the hope that his love will ever be returned. In the years that they’ve known each other, and after the realisation of his own feelings, the other has never truly shown any indication that there might be a possibility of anything more happening between them. And now, a year into being idols his dreams of having one of those sickly sweet romantic relationship is all but what it is, just a dream. Even so, it doesn’t stop him from portraying the love that he feels. From giving him the love that he deserves. It hurts knowing that he doesn’t receive them the way he hopes them to be received but with being an idol, Minhyuk takes what he can get because it’s all or nothing, isn’t it?

Being attuned to Wonho’s emotions, from the years spent together, Minhyuk is easily able to pick up any uneasiness or dejection felt by the elder. It hurts him to think that Wonho, precious, lovable, talented Wonho figures himself not good enough. Thinks that he does not give enough. When in reality, he was the one that has been motivating everyone to be the way that they are now. So Minhyuk made it his goal to bring back Wonho’s self confidence that was lost somewhere between harsh comments by anti-fans and the reprimanding of training coaches. However, the 23-year-old knew that his actions alone won’t help much. What difference could he make especially when he is not able to be around all the time, and he’s not all that special to Wonho anyways he thinks.

So, it shouldn’t come as a surprise to see Wonho being coddled by the other members as well. It definitely shouldn’t hurt as much as it did when he sees Wonho and Hyungwon going out more often together. He knew, even from the time they were in No Mercy, even when everyone was supposed to be rivals of some sort that Wonho and Hyungwon had a special bond that he could never have with the elder. Still, the unnecessary ache in his chest and the heaviness in his stomach doesn’t stop itself. In any case, Minhyuk does find comfort in the fact that Wonho himself seek out Minhyuk’s presence during broadcasts and interviews. Even if it’s to make use of him as a shield to cover up for the latter’s lack of confidence. Minhyuk will take any opportunity he gets to be close to the one he loves. Don’t get him wrong, Minhyuk knows that the older loves him too but he is also well aware of the fact that it is not the kind of love he wishes it to be and it never will. Minhyuk thinks that maybe there is already something brewing out of Wonho’s relationship with Hyungwon. Though that doesn’t diminish his ever-present feelings. He can’t stop trying his best to pull Wonho out of his slum nor could he prevent the two visuals from their daily outings. Not when he can see for himself the effects those private times have on Wonho. Minhyuk can’t even bring himself to resent Hyungwon after seeing how happy he is able make Wonho. Hence whenever Minhyuk unfortunately, in his case, catches the two back from their day out he gives them a small welcome before disappearing into his room before Wonho’s bright smile could pierce through his breaking heart.

They had a radio show scheduled for the day and as usual, Wonho had requested for Minhyuk to sit by him. Naturally Minhyuk agreed without a second thought, all the while trying to keep the pounding in his chest to a minimum. The show went on with the routine questions asked every comeback. However, there was a special segment carried out this time round where the DJ gave each member a chance to convey any messages or confessions they have towards each other. As each member took their time in letting out their innermost feelings, Minhyuk was near bursting with the need to spill his thoughts into words. Regrettably due to the limited time they had, Minhyuk couldn’t say all that he wanted and Wonho didn’t even manage to get his turn. They did however promise that they would film him separately after the ending as compensation. Minhyuk on the other hand could only return his impressions back into their cages, locked in his heart. He didn’t think there would be any other appropriate time for him to ever be as honest as he was ready to be a moment ago. And just like that their radio show came to an end as Shownu gave his ending comments and the DJ bid goodbye for the night. As they were all ushered out of the studio into the waiting area, the staff preparing to film Wonho, Mihyuk couldn’t help reflecting on his feelings. He had an inkling on what Wonho had to say to all the members. Minhyuk was positive that Wonho would comment on how much Hyungwon has helped in pulling him up. On the other hand, Minhyuk wasn’t sure if his efforts for the elder had much payoff. He was resigned to never being of much significance in the older vocalist’s life.

Once all the members gathered behind the camera giving Wonho his solo shot, Minhyuk sat back to the side observing his crush. The black-haired boy could see Wonho’s feelings shining from his eyes as he spoke, his regrets, his gratefulness, his appreciation to all the members. It was easy, even if you weren’t apt in deciphering Wonho’s emotions as Minhyuk was. Because the blonde boy has always been an open book. He wasn’t afraid to show his true feelings even though that will be his down fall one day. Hearing Wonho’s confessions, Minhyuk let a frown mar his face. He hadn’t realise just how much his hyung has kept pent up. One by one, Wonho relayed his thanks to each member. Minhyuk listened, his chest warming witnessing Wonho’s love for them. When it finally came for Minhyuk’s turn, the younger was surprised by how much the elder noticed his efforts. Wonho’s voice shook as he tried to hold back his tears and talk at the same time. Minhyuk himself took deep breathes to stop from trembling. He felt his own eyes moisten the more Wonho spoke. Thankfully the elder moved on before Minhyuk could do anything stupid like cutting him off by jumping on him.

The next member Wonho had in mind was Hyungwon. Upon hearing the name, the brunet held his breath preparing to hear words of gratitude and love towards his friend. Yet when Wonho failed to mention how much Hyungwon was the reason he is still able to smile these days, Minhyuk was confused. Sure, it wasn't like Wonho could declare that Hyungwon was his world, his beacon of light or anything of that sort. But it still took Minhyuk aback noting how little Wonho had to say about Hyungwon as compared to himself. Visibly shaking his head, Minhyuk reasoned that it meant nothing to have Wonho listing his every deed yet failing to confess about the model-like vocalist. He probably did that so he doesn't accidentally reveal something he shouldn't have with his current emotional state. The blonde singer went on with the remaining members and when the staff signalled for him to wrap up, Minhyuk couldn't contain himself any longer. Without thought, he rushed in to embrace the elder. Minhyuk's heart was aching at the sincerity and regrets that spilled out through his words. He wished more than anything in the world to tell Wonho that he loves him, that he is perfect in every way and sense to Minhyuk. When he finally gained his bearings, Minhyuk released from the hug to allow for a proper closing.

By the time everyone had packed up and settled down, the other members made their way to Wonho. Offering him their comfort and support. Minhyuk hung back observing his team, but in particular the other two thirds of visual line. Hyungwon didn't seem the least bit dismayed at Wonho's lack of acknowledgement like Minhyuk expected. On the other hand, he seemed oddly proud of the elder. Though that is not an issue in the current situation. Still, Minhyuk wondered if maybe their reltionship had come to some sort of a standstill. Before he could ponder more, their manager had came herding them back to their van.

It was close to dawn when everyone found themselves showered and ready for bed. Most of the members have already made themselves comfortable lying on any available surface, some too tired to make it from the bathroom to their rooms. Minhyuk was about ready to pass out after the long day they had. Sadly, he didn't get to make any further movement from his position on the couch before he heard his name being called out. Looking towards the direction of the voice, he found Wonho freshly showered with his hair still a little damp standing at the mouth of their hallway. Minhyuk tilted his head in askance, mind having slowed down considerably after allowing himself to rest.

"Can I-can we talk? For a while," Wonho's voice was soft and quite filling in the gentle sounds of night.

"Sure," Minhyuk nodded and Wonho turned, making his way to the bedroom. Minhyuk took that as a cue for him to get up and follow. He turned to look back at the members who are sprawled in the living room. Finding Hyunwoo and Hyungwon both releasing soft snores and sniffles, Minhyuk guessed they'll be getting more privacy for the talk than they've had in ages.

When the raven-haird vocalist entered the bedroom, he found Wonho sitting at the foot of his bed. Head hung low and looking like he's trying to calm himself down. Or gear himself up. Minhyuk isn't sure what he should expect of the talk. It's much too late, early, his mind quipped, for him to be able to process long thoughts. Instead, Minhyuk shuffled towards the elder keeping his feet light of noise. It seemed fitting with how quiet the room was with only the two of them. Taking a seat beside Wonho, Minhyuk waited and observed the other man. He so much wanted to reach out and embrace his love and although he knew he would not be rejected, the vocalist doesn't think he'll be able to hold back his feelings tonight. The events hours prior were as fresh as winter breeze, playing in a loop inside his head.

Wonho released a sigh as he prepared himself for what he has to say. His mind had been running a mile a minute for the past few weeks. Thoughts jumbled up from thinking of work, of his shortcomings, of their fans, of disappointing them and of Minhyuk. Minhyuk. The mood-maker of Monsta X, the sunshine that never fails to put others before him. Minhyuk who has done so much for him, being his pillar of support. Yet he hadn't managed to show the younger just how much he means to him, how much he appreciated him, how much he love him.

In front of the camera he sticks close to Minhyuk, reaping off of his loquaciousness but once they are behind closed doors he retracts himself from the other. Finding purchase in the presence that is Hyungwon. He could see how much he hurt the younger with his act. Could see the pain in those bright eyes whenever he and Hyungwon were together. But he couldn't go to him. Couldn't approach him before he was positive of his own feelings. That was the reason why he sought out Hyungwon. He needed someone that knows him and is willing to listen and even though Hyungwon is younger, he knows the right thing to say. After weeks of letting his feelings brew and with the excitement of a new comeback having settled down, Wonho needed to clear things up with Minhyuk.

Looking up at the younger male as he sat down, Wonho felt himself calm. It was one of the many qualities Minhyuk possessed. He was able to make you feel at peace even when everything is in a whirlwind. Wonho gave the younger vocalist a small smile, one that was returned filled with tenderness.

"What did you want to talk about, hyung?" Minhyuk questioned. He thought it would be better if he prompted the elder, seeing as how his hyung was still trying to organize himself.

Seemingly to have made up his mind, Wonho started pouring out all of his thoughts and feelings that he had repressed.

"I need you to promise to just listen to what I have to say because it took me a really long time to finally be able to say this and I don't think I can continue if you interrupt, alright?" to which Minhyuk gave a nod of his head in understanding.

"I wanted to say thank you. To you. First of all. You've always been there for me, ever since we were trainees, even when we were all fighting for a position in the group. You never once turned your back on me when I needed support and for that I am very thankful to you. I know I haven't been able to show you just how much I appreciated your efforts. I'm sorry for that. You're always the first one to know if something is wrong with me or if I just needed a shoulder to lean on. And you've never complained about any of it. You could've just left me be but you didn't and I appreciate that. I'm sorry that I haven't been able to give you much in return. I'm sorry that I hurt you when I chose Hyungwon even though you offered yourself. I never meant to. I'd never mean to hurt you but I needed to set some things straight. Clear up my mind about certain things. That's why I can say this now, to you. I'm not good with words. As much as I would like to be but I'm trying my hardest right now. I'm sorry that it took me so long to realise this. I'm sorry that I probably broke your heart a million and one times after all these while. I've known how you felt for quite some time. It's hard not to notice someone's feelings when they so willingly go out of their way for you." Wonho let out a small chuckle, a wispy blow of air at remembering all the times Minhyuk was there by his side. Minhyuk sat stock still beside the elder. He hadn't been aware of how obvious he was. He had thought he'd kept everything concealed.

Suddenly it felt like he was underwater, with his airways blocked and constricted. He understood why Wonho needed to speak with him in private, recognised the telltales of a rejection coming. And he couldn't breathe, forgot how to breathe. Inhale and exhale. He knew his feelings would never be returned, has accepted the fact ever since he caught onto his feelings. Yet knowing that a rejection is coming still hurts his heart in ways that he wishes never to experience. Minhyuk almost missed the words spoken by the elder during his inner turmoil. "Hyungwon has helped me discern a lot of things. He was the only one I was truly comfortable talking to, apart from you. And I very well couldn't have spoken to you about this because you're the main concern here. What I'm trying to say is that you don't have to hurt anymore, Minhyuk" Wonho led his eyes to look at his companion, a hand slowly ascending to cup at pale cheeks. The elder caressed a thumb gently across the smooth skin, trying its best to sooth the glistening eyes now mask with confusion as well. "I love you too, Minhyuk. It took me longer than expected to comprehend my emotions but I see it for what it is now, for what it feels now. There's no denying that what I felt, what I'm feeling is love." By now, the tears Minhyuk has been trying to hold in can't be stopped. Overflowing with relief and washing away heartaches. For the second time in a day, Minhyuk brought his arms around the elder. Burying his face into the crook of his neck, Wonho could feel his shirt soaking up Minhyuk's tears but he could also feel how the taller male is trembling against him. Bringing his own arms around the ebony-haired male, Wonho squeezed the lithe body. Wishing with all his might that Minhyuk is able to feel the love he feels through their entwined selves.

Minhyuk was the first to pull away. Chest still heaving from his prior breakdown. This time, it was the younger who took the elder's face in his hands. "You have no idea how much, how long I've wanted, wished every night that I will be able to hear those words from you. Even when I knew it was near impossible, there was a tiny part of me that still hoped, and I am so glad that it didn't disappoint me. I love you so much, it hurts when I see how happy others can make you feel and I'm left helpless in the corner." Minhyuk wiped away the droplets found on his love's face. "How many times I wished you would look at me and tell me that you feel the same way, that I am hurting for nothing. And now you did. I can't be any happier than at this moment right now. I didn't think you loved me back but you proved me wrong. Thank you, hyung."

The smiles that donned both males were the most sincere and genuine either have ever managed within the last few months. Nothing could have tore them away from each other in that moment as the drifted closer into the other's warmth. For the first time in years, Minhyuk felt his heart healing. The erratic beat in his chest slowing down to a slow tempo as rest took it's place. Wonho was facing a similar sentiment, having his self filled with love and care for the one in his arms. He could feel lethargy wrapping them up, noting how the younger's hold is a little looser around his waist. "Hey Minhyuk, would you like to sleep with me tonight? It's kinda lonely since Hyunwoo and Hyungwon are dead to the world in the living room." Minhyuk blinked up at the older male, having nearly succumbed to sleep with the warmth surrounding him. He gave a tired smile at the request, "I can't think of a better thing to do than that right now, hyung."

Settling down on the bed once it was dark, both maes couldn't keep the smiles off of their faces. As the night gets deeper and their breathes fall into a steady rythm, their last thoughts were of how well the other fitted in the arms.

When the sun rose signalling a new day, Hyungwon entered his shared room to a view that instantly brought a smile to his sleep-laden features. He was glad they have finally found each other. Now their days will be happier and much lesser heartaches, hopefully.