What… “…what are you talking about?”

The words leave his lips before he realises that he had said them. Woohyun barely has time to wonder why Sunggyu had asked the question or the fact that his response doesn’t sound incredulous – which in itself is probably an answer – because he’s filled with a strange sense of what feels vaguely like relief. But at the same time, Woohyun registers that the feeling is also much more insidious than plain simple relief.

(Because, finally, Sunggyu knows.)

He doesn’t have the time to contemplate further on what he’s feeling because in front of him, Sunggyu blurts out, “You aren’t surprised.”

Woohyun blinks. He’s not sure what Sunggyu means.

“I mean,” Sunggyu continues, as if he’d picked on the question in Woohyun’s mind (or maybe he just took a while to put his words together), “Won’t a normal reaction be to think that I’m out of my mind for even asking that? You just sound…”

“…relieved?”

Sunggyu’s eyes narrow. “Is that what you’re feeling right now?”

Woohyun doesn’t even have to think. “No.”

There’s a long pause where they both look at each other like they have more they want to say, but don’t know how, or where to start. In the end, Woohyun sighs. “I’m surprised you figured it out, actually.”

The “oh” Sunggyu makes is barely audible, but Woohyun catches it anyway.  Sunggyu looks up, then to the floor, and eventually he says, “So… you do?”

“Do what?”

“Like me like me.”

Woohyun feels like laughing at Sunggyu’s choice of repeating the words to get his point across. Or maybe the laughter is an automatic response to prevent him from his other reflex – crying – but he’s in control enough to realise that either would be inappropriate. So he settles for, “I guess, yeah.” He doesn’t expect his answer to make Sunggyu jerk his head up suddenly, but it does, and now he’s wondering why Sunggyu looks angry.

“What do you mean, ‘I guess’?”

Woohyun contemplates evading the question, but it seems a little too late, so he shrugs, trying to ignore the uncomfortable feeling growing in his chest. “I mean, I do like you that way, but it doesn’t matter.” After a pause, he adds, “Nothing needs to happen, you know. We can still be friends, like we’ve always been. Nothing needs to change.”

Another pregnant pause hangs in the air, strained with words unsaid and unreadable looks passed, before Sunggyu mumbles, “Okay.”

Woohyun’s alone in his apartment. Sunggyu went off already, saying he needs to go shortly after he mumbled that “okay”, and Woohyun’s not sure what he’s feeling at the moment. Now that he’s alone, with all the time he needs to examine his thoughts and emotions, Woohyun’s not sure if he’s glad that the conversation went the way it did, or disappointed.

He’s not disappointed that Sunggyu didn’t declare his undying love for him after confirming that Woohyun does indeed like him. It’s not how things work. Woohyun’s realistic enough to know that such stuff only happens in dramas and rom-coms, and besides, it’s not like he ever thought it’ll be possible, Sunggyu liking him back romantically when Sunggyu has only ever liked girls.  It’s one of the reasons why he never told the other about his feelings, keeping it a secret for who knows how long. No, that’s not the reason why he might be disappointed. It’s the fact that the conversation ended on a relatively anticlimactic note.

He’s not sure what he was expecting. Sunggyu getting angry? Sunggyu getting upset? Sunggyu getting worked up? Any or all of the above? Although Woohyun hadn’t really considered the possibilities because he had never intended to tell Sunggyu about his one-sided feelings, he didn’t think the conversation ending with just an “okay” to his “we can still be friends” would be how things went if (when) the secret got out. Wouldn’t people normally have a bigger reaction? Then again, maybe Sunggyu isn’t exactly the most normal person. Woohyun doesn’t know if he should be disappointed or glad that his little secret got found out with little to no fanfare (he’s not even sure how Sunggyu suddenly noticed when he hadn’t in all the years before). There’s a tiny bit of relief in not having to hide his feelings any longer, but to be honest, Woohyun’s grown so used to transforming any romantic feelings he has for Sunggyu into