Hoseok shifted in the darkness, rolling onto his side and pulling his arms around the pillow under his head. Crisp early morning air filtered in through the open window and the quiet buzz of silence pushed him deeper into his thoughts and farther from sleep. The covers were warm, but at the same time almost suffocating. Maybe he was running a fever? Or maybe it was just another night of nothing.

It was nothing; there were no reasons to be awake at three in the morning. No reason to feel empty, to feel like everything was slowly losing meaning, there was never a reason. But that didn’t stop the sensation of his heart just stopping, or at least the wondering of what it would be like if that actually happened.

You’re okay, you have nothing to be sad about.

But I still feel this way.

It’s the shallow emotions that come with lack of sleep.

And if it’s not?

It is. It has to be.

What do you do when you’re not sure? When the option to reach out and ask for help only leads to thoughts of you just making this bigger than it needs to be?

“Awake?” A groggy voice broke the silence and the thoughts. Yoongi shifted behind Hoseok and wrapped an arm around his waist. His lips lightly touched the back of Hoseok’s neck before he lightly nuzzled into his shoulder.

“Awake.” Hoseok replied, voice cracking with disuse.

“Tomorrow, okay?” Yoongi sighed, grip tightening. “Tomorrow let’s deal with this, but right now you need sleep.”

Hoseok nodded even if Yoongi wasn’t looking. Yoongi’s hand pulled his shirt with a light tug, a sign that the older of the two wanted him to roll over. Hoseok did just that, pulling Yoongi into his arms and Yoongi placed a soothing kiss onto his lips before closing his eyes again.

Conclusions can be hard to come by, but maybe this would end and maybe things would be okay. Maybe Hoseok would always have Yoongi to kiss him and ease his mind, at least enough that he could fall back asleep on nights when the air was too warm and the quiet was too deafening. Maybe Hoseok wouldn’t have these nights and eventually when things should be good, they’ll feel good.

Or maybe there will only be nights that don’t feel like anything.