"Ah, it's cold," Yuta says, more of a statement than a complaint, and hides his face in the collar of his jacket. Jaehyun glances at him, at his flushed cheeks and tired eyes. Yuta has been not feeling that well for the past few days, and Jaehyun really has no idea why Yuta insisted to go with him to the convi store. The shopping list Taeyong made for him isn't that long, he could handle it himself.  

"You should have stayed home, hyung. You can still go back—"

"It's fine," Yuta cuts him off, his tone leaving no room for discussion. Jaehyun frowns; it's not like Yuta to snap so easily, he must really be feeling out of it. Yuta seems to interpret his expression as something other than worry, because he ducks his head and the next words he speaks sound apologetic. "I needed a breath of fresh air."

"Seoul air isn't all that fresh," Jaehyun jokes, hoping to lessen the tension between them. Yuta looks up, his eyes crinkled in a smile.

"Shut up," he replies, tone soft. It's not like him not to come up with a snarky comeback either and Jaehyun almost voices his concern but then Yuta continues, "Besides, Taeyong said if someone doesn't watch over you, you're going to buy too many snacks."

"I don't buy that many," Jaehyun huffs. "Ten hyung is much worse when it comes to that. He buys tons of chocolate.

"You can't trick me. You're our only cute pig."

Jaehyun can't even feel offended, not with the way Yuta is smiling at him, his eyes lighted up with affection. He sighs, looking down on the park alley, covered in dry, colorful leaves. They crunch beneath their shoes with every step they take.

"At least I'm cute."

"Yes," Yuta agrees with a laugh. There's a pause and then he continues, much softer. "Very much so."

They turn left to a path that leads them out of the park and to a street crossing but before they reach the crossing, Yuta stops in his tracks.

"What?" Jaehyun asks, giving him a confused look. Yuta turns to him but he doesn't meet his eyes instead looking down at the ground.

"Actually, there is a reason I wanted to go with you." He digs his hands into his coat pockets, shifts his weight from one foot to another. "It's hard to find a time alone these days and I need to tell you something or I'm going to explode." He laughs a little but it sounds tense and forced.

"What?" Jaehyun prods, worried. Did he do something to make Yuta angry? Or is Yuta in some sort of trouble?

"I like you," Yuta blurts out. Jaehyun gapes at him, not quite processing the words. Like, as in…? "I've thought about it. At first I thought maybe it's because we've got few opportunities to date and I know you're into guys so I just—" He pauses, lets out a sigh. "But it's not like that. I genuinely like you." He gives Jaehyun a quick, worried glance, then looks away. "I thought… you should know."

Wow, Jaehyun thinks. Knowing Jaehyun is gay probably made it easier for Yuta but still, confessing just like that… he's really got guts. Not that Jaehyun expected any less of him.

Thing is, he's not sure how he feels. Being attracted to men and living under the same roof with a bunch of cute boys isn't easy, but he's learned to ignore the ual attraction and he's not reckless enough to fall for straight— or, in some cases, taken— guys. Of course, he knows sometimes you can't help it, but until now he's managed to keep his feelings in check. And Yuta… for one, Jaehyun was sure he was straight. Also, they've been roommates for a while and Jaehyun is just used to him, he doesn't think that way about him anymore. They're comfortable enough to burp and make poop jokes in each other's presence, is there any room left for romantic feelings?

Apparently for Yuta, there is. And Jaehyun can't ignore the fact that hearing Yuta confess made him happy.

"I… need some time to think about it."

"That's okay." Yuta finally looks up at him. "But you better not take too long, or else," he adds with a faint smile. The threat is clearly meant to be playful but instead, it sounds a little helpless. Jaehyun has the urge to pull Yuta into a hug and tell him if someone doesn't agree to go out with him then they must be incredibly stupid, but unfortunately he is the one hesitating.

He does need to think it through, though. Yuta did, he doesn't want to be with Jaehyun just because he's there and he's available. Jaehyun doesn't want to be with anyone like this, either.

They barely talk in the store; Jaehyun is lost in thought, but he manages to get every item on the list. Yuta seems much more distracted; he wanders the aisles aimlessly, picks up products from the shelves and puts them back without even looking at them. It makes Jaehyun wonder— does Yuta like him that much? It's flattering but worrying at the same time. He doesn't want to hurt him, but he knows he can't start going out with him just for that reason.

On their way back, he finds himself stealing glances at Yuta. His thick mop of golden brown hair, already too long, falling into his eyes. The sharp line of his nose, his lips, red and plump. He wonders what it would be like to kiss them. It's not like he's never thought about it before but it's different now that the possibility is very real. And… he doesn't find the idea unpleasant at all.

Then his eyes wander over the colorful trees, lighted up by the park lamp posts, the dark sky, the sparkling city lights, the dry leaves beneath his feet.

He used to think Yuta should have been born in summer. It suits him; he's bright and dazzling like a sunny summer day, sometimes a little overwhelming in its intensity, and he's an untamed force, like a violent summer storm.

But now that he thinks about it, maybe autumn suits Yuta even better. There's something soft and soothing about him, something that makes people feel secure with him around. Maybe it's the way he doesn't let little things bring him down, maybe it's how he's always ready to laugh, how he tries to smile even through tears. And the way he notices when someone is shy and uncomfortable, the way he's able to make everyone feel at ease. So maybe he's more like the sun on a chilly autumn day; people are naturally drawn to him.

And Jaehyun is too. He must be, for thinking all that in the first place, because let's be real, who compares their platonic friends to the autumn sun. There aren't that many people he always likes having around but Yuta is definitely one of them and— he was right. He'd be stupid if he didn't want to go out with him.

"You're too quiet," Yuta says suddenly, pulling Jaehyun out of his thoughts. "Don't let it bother you too much, okay? You can just ignore it if you like. I don't want things to get awkward or anything."

"No, hyung— sorry. I was just lost in thought." Jaehyun gives Yuta a reassuring smile. "I never feel awkward around you."

Yuta smiles back. Jaehyun catches himself thinking it's really cute, the way the corners of his eyes turn down a little. "That's good I guess? Or does that mean I have no chance?" He gives a soft laugh. "I mean, you get nervous if you like someone."

That piques Jaehyun's interest. "Do you get nervous around me, hyung?"

"I… sometimes? I’m really ing nervous today, if you didn't notice."

Jaehyun hums. "How cute."

"Oh, shut up," Yuta huffs and shoves at his arm. He's smiling, though, and Jaehyun decides if they were going out, he'd have to kiss Yuta right now. Actually, he really does want to kiss him anyway. His heart speeds up a little at the thought and he his lips; he would do it, if they weren’t in public.

Turns out he didn't need a lot of time to make up his mind. He already knows the answer when they enter the building. He catches Yuta's arm before he manages to press the elevator button; he turns him around and presses him against the wall. Yuta's shopping bag hits the wall with a soft thud, the olive and sesame oil bottles jingle inside it.

"What?" Yuta's eyes are wide and Jaehyun laughs at his baffled expression. Seeing that, Yuta smiles too— he's really always ready to smile. "What?" he says, this time sounding amused. Funnily enough, Jaehyun is a little nervous. Or maybe he is just excited. He can't wait to see the look on Yuta's face after he says it; he wants to see Yuta happy.

"I've thought about it enough."

Yuta visibly tenses, and his smile falters a little. "Already?"

"I really like you too, hyung," Jaehyun says softly. There's a moment of stunned silence and then Yuta tilts his head, giving him a doubtful look.

"Are you sure? Hundred percent sure? Because I'm serious about—"

"I'm sure, hyung," Jaehyun interrupts and leans in for a kiss.

Yuta is still for a second but then he kisses back with great enthusiasm— it's a little clumsy and messy. Yuta's lips are chapped from wind and he tastes like Taeyong's kimchi fried rice and Jaehyun can smell the shampoo they both use on his hair; it's all very familiar but new and thrilling at the same time.

Yuta is smiling again when he pulls back; his lips are kiss swollen and his eyes are bright, and Jaehyun is more than a hundred percent sure that this is exactly what he wants.

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