We had been a wonderful couple, done everything together. Ryeowook cooked, I ate. Sometimes, it seemed as if he was the oldest one, but then other times, I was the elder he loved. That was, until I made the mistake of falling for another. My threeway had lasted for almost a year, so easily I thought I was being. But, of course Ryeowook knew something was wrong. In his defence, his gentle understanding nature had defended me as best he could. But, I never was good at loving one person, and Hangeng, was the complete opposite of Ryeowook...

/Flashback\

“Hyung, can you go to the market and buy some sides for me?” Ryeowook asked, the smell of dinner wafting in the air. I moan, looking over from the television.

“Is there a list?” I ask, both of us know how bad I am at remembering things, especially from the kitchen. Ryeowook smiled as he handed me a piece of paper.

“Don’t get lost, and please hurry up.” Ryeowook ordered before leaning up and pecking my cheek in a chaste kiss. I smile at him before stealing a kiss from his lips.

“I have never been lost before in my life since you arrived.” I purr before grabbing my coat and keys, and walking out the door. The walk down the busy streets of Shanghai always made me happy. The smell, the looks, everything was exotic. Loud voices calling for customers, and the beeping of cars and other vehicles drew my attention. It was rush hour after all, but Ryeowook loved to cook early so he could spend the evening with me. His work usually kept him busy at all hours though. The problem of having a lover who wrote music as a home job.

“Fish, fresh fish!” a woman called as she stood outside the market. I glance at the list in my hands. Fish was not on the list, although, Ryeowook was not usually one for fish. Entering the market, I grab a cart and begin my walk around the aisles. My first stop, was always the alcohol row. Again, it was not a place Ryeowook enjoyed my presence at, but I did linger here either way.

As I rummage to search for a drink to my liking, a flash of flesh skirted my eyesight. Looking over, I noticed a tall man with white hair and tattoos on his right arm, dressed in black leather.

“Sorry, am I in your way?” I ask moving to the side for the man. He glanced over, and that was when I fell. Those dark eyes that seemed to glisten with the sparkle of danger and confidence, and that smile, no smirk. It screamed cocky and conceited. This man read trouble, and at the time, I ignored it. It was my first, of many, mistakes I made.

“Not at all, infact, you are welcome to return to your spot. I was enjoying the view.” his attitude and words attracted me like a moth to flame. The forbidden draw, that need and desire all men have.

“And, what view would that be?” I slip my list into my pocket, dinner, and the man waiting for me at home, leaving my mind in the moment. I should have stopped him when he caressed the side of my face, when his curled a strand of my hair around his finger. But, I was not a very good monogamous person. I loved to flirt, and I hated being tied down for too long.

“My name is Hangeng.” he spoke, his words like a whisper, his actions like a scream.

“Heechul,” I reply, my mind intoxicated by his presence. I followed him towards the back of the store, our bodies merging unnoticed through the mass of people. Hangeng quickly pulled us into a workers only room, our mouths quickly finding each other as we made out.

Again, I should have seen the warning and danger I was playing at. The fire I was starting. But, as Hangeng’s hand ventured to my crotch, all sense and sensibility left me, and only those sinful flames of desire were left.

I always said I was not good with monogamous relationships.

When I did manage to make it back to my shared home with Ryeowook, I could see the anger in his eyes.

“What took you so long?” he asked, hands on his hips as a large wooden spoon rested in his hand.

“Lot’s of people out today.” I replied handing over the groceries and taking a seat at the table. Ryeowook seemed to believe the lie at the time, sadly, it would not be the last he heard the words fall from my lips.

For weeks, I snuck from my job and joined Hangeng. Riding his motorcycle around all of Shanghai and always ending up at his home. I knew it was bad, I knew it would kill Ryeowook when he discovered my dirty secret. But, Hangeng was a drug, one I was addicted too with every fiber of my being.

“You seem a little distant Rella, is everything alright?” Hangeng asked as he played with my hair. He knew about Ryeowook, in this weird messed up relationship. It was wrong.

“I can’t keep doing this.” I tell him, despite my words I was already hard and ready for him again. He knew what I said was the truth, but, it was a truth I had repeated for over a month now.

“Why don’t you just leave him?” Hangeng asked, it was another of the same questions we always asked.

“I still love him.” I wasn’t lying, I loved Ryeowook, but, I also loved Hangeng. It was my dilemma. What was even sadder, was that, this was not the first time I had cheated on Ryeowook. When we lived in Korea, he had caught me with the church boy at his church. Siwon, had been the reason we now lived in Shanghai.

“He will find out eventually.” Hangeng warned. I nodded in agreement, Ryeowook wasn’t stupid by any means, he just refused to hate me. Sliding from the bed, I gathered my clothes from the floor and headed to shower. I had three hours before Ryeowook expected me home from work.

Hangeng was wise to stay away from the bathroom as I got ready to return home. My walk of shame covered by rush hour evening’s.

When I opened the door to my apartment, the usual smells of dinner were absent, instead, the silent streams of a whispered conversation drifted from the kitchen. When I entered, Ryeowook was leaning against the counter, and his business partner Yesung was at the table.

It wasn’t the first time I had seen the male. He and Ryeowook worked together even before we started dating.

“Hi Yesung,” I greet as I take a seat, careful to watch Ryeowook’s eyes. The youngest in the room though, seemed to act as if nothing was wrong. It always meant he knew something was wrong. And I was right. That night was yet another fight.

“You promised Heenim, you told me it was just a one time thing.” Ryeowook screamed, the glass of scotch that flew to my head shattering against the wall and spilling it’s contents on the floor at my feet. He was drunk and angry, and it was my fault. Again.

“If you know, why are you still here?” I scream it back, but just as I push him away, I cling to him. Ryeowook’s anger is usually well contained, but I always seem to bring it loose.

“Because I wanted to trust you.” there it was, trust. I craved it and he knew it, but we both knew I never deserved it.

“Then leave!” again I push him away despite trying to keep him. What happened next, I never expected, but always knew would happen.

“I am leaving, my plane for Korea leaves tomorrow. I’m going home with Yesung hyung. I can’t stay here anymore Heenim. I’ve given you too many chances.” Ryeowook whispers, his eyes downcasted and brimmed with tears. I can’t move, those tears are my fault. As I watched Ryeowook pack and leave the next day, I shed my tears. I played with fire, and danced with the devil.

“Rella, are you coming?” Hangeng asked as he appeared at my side. I can only nod, knowing, that one day, I would hurt him too, just like I had Ryeowook. Like a sakura tree in fall, I had lost my petal....