it's his safe haven, hidden in a forest of looming everests where green grow galore and beautiful flowers flourish. sweet smelling creeks and a makeshift waterfall flow throughout the mass of nature, animals scamper around peacefully and birds sing into the lavender blue skies.

on days when heaven's water would pour down onto the earth and the soil would become soft, when the creeks would fill to the brim and the clay would crumble into a dangerous trap yet form into a beautiful sight; taeyong would travel through the woods with a small bag of clothes and make his way onto a path to a brighter day.

follow the small creek, pass the large rock, step over the rusty shovel and walk past the cardinal's nest; there stands a large tree, thick vines adoring its maroon bark. nothing special once explained, but a sight to see instead. this is taeyong's heaven, his secret place, a place of memories. the place where his heart belonged; a tree house.

taeyong is a slim boy, thin form often thought of as useless until he slinks up the tree in cat like movements, hands gripping the slick vines as he eases up and hops into his small wooden house.

he remembers when he built it, back in his second year of highschool with his best friend. they'd escape the hellhole called school with planks of wood and nails in their pockets, always returning to their classroom with stained clothes and dirtied hands. it had taken them to the very last day of highschool to finish the treehouse--but memories still seeped into the wood when they were still working on it.

he'd close the small door with trembling hands--it was something he did even in summer.

jaehyun, what the lanky boy had called himself with a confident smile. that was who taeyong spent his days with; lazing around and living out the days of youth with not a single care. many memories fight their way into his head and he accepts them all.

there was a piece of wood they'd painted red, and another painted blue. jaehyun slept on the blue side, taeyong slept on the red. he had never understood why the younger male had split them up, leaving them both cold at nights, but he found out soon.

a mason jar sat lonely in the corner of the room, filled with paper hearts and promise rings, brought the thought of how one day jaehyun had pinned him to the floor of the small treehouse and confessed the strong feelings he held for him. "I love you"s were shared. fears were confessed and heartbeats fastened in fear of rejection. taeyong had accepted it wholly.

the scratches on the floor were embarrassing reminders of the results of his acceptance of love, of how he'd lost his ity to his best friend. breaths were mingled, lips were molded together and bodies made heated contact, rain fell unnoticed outside the wooden heaven as young love bloomed in the form of a kiss. words were exchanged to be forever remembered.

an empty flower vase pressed the promise of growing old together onto the tip of his tongue, forced tears to brim in his eyes and for pain to sting at his heart. inside the vase sat a ring--different from all the smooth ones locked away with colourful hearts; this one was beautiful and held a bright stone in the middle. it was breathtaking, a gorgeous ruby sitting pretty on a silver ring--the stone meant for him and him only, it was his birthstone of course.

there was the memory of when they first started college, when they had drunkenly escaped to the treehouse with thoughts of confessing newfound fears for their relationship. jaehyun fearing judgment, and taeyong a loss of love. he knew of jaehyun's recent flings and he didn't agree with it.

and then he remembers from the empty picture frame with cracked glass, hanging crooked on the wall, the first time they'd gotten into a fight; things had been thrown, tears had been shed, wounds had bled and hearts had been broken. taeyong remembers how scared he was, how he thought he'd lost the only person he loved, how he didn't know how to get back home--how he would be alone once more. jaehyun had come back for him, apologizing over and over that he never meant to hurt him, he never meant the bruises nor the screams or lies.

and then the next day he was gone, never coming back.

times would never be the same though, they really wouldn't be.

things had changed since then.

everything was a big mess and no matter how hard he tried, he couldn't help it.

he had run, like a coward, from his problems. just like jaehyun did, all those years ago--he had run.

back at home he was smothered with unnecessary care and kindness. he'd never accept it though--because he was normal for s sake! they always tried to help him with the most simple things, but he didn't need it! he could simply be going to brush his teeth--his sister would snatch away his toothbrush "I wouldn't want you to use too much" she'd reason, handing it back.

taeyong ran, no bag with him, eyes watering and body aching. he furrowed his eyebrows, trying his damn best to focus. his eyes flickered to and fro despite his concentration--and nothing seemed to clear up. pain pulsed in his head and nausea bubbled in his throat. rain poured hard on his bruised and battered body; he had tripped into the flooding creek, body dragged against jagged rocks as it rushed angrily. it had been a mistake, he hadn't been able to see clearly--it was an honest, normal mistake.

and then he found himself sitting cold near the big rock, no recognizable landmark anywhere near him. until he finally spotted the rusted shovel--he'd lost his footing, scraped his hand on a rough tree and gotten a nasty gash on his knee whence he fell onto the ground. it must've been the rain, no other reason.

and then he couldn't spot the nest. it was too far away. too blurry. he tried to gather up anything, any reason other than a loss of eyesight as the reason as to why he couldn't see something that was barely a foot away from the ground--there was nothing though; no rain in his eyes, no branches hiding the nest away, nothing blocking his vision: nothing.

and he couldn't help but break down in tears.

he sobbed and screamed in anger, banging on the muddy floor with all his might. rain fell heavy and wet his already drenched clothes--he didn't care, he couldn't.

soon enough lightning struck down on the wet earth and thunder boomed loudly, tree tops trembled and animals cried in distress.

the cardinals nest fell before him, empty except for brightly coloured feathers--vivid red gleaming with rain and irony.

hope struggled to build in his heart, but once it defeated doubts and fears; he found himself climbing the large and precious tree.

his hands slipped, his grip went slack and his body pummeled towards certain death--left for dead by nature itself, what a tragic story. he became angry, everything; his family to his eyesight, from jaehyun to the neighbors that called him a : it all pissed him off, and he just didn't want to let go. he had to prove them wrong.

anger surged fiery hot in his veins and he grabbed at a vine as fast as he could--he held onto it with all his might and hastily wiped his tears away whence the securing blanket of warm rain fastened around him and assured him that he could do it, a strange sense of relief with the niggling recollection of jaehyun's warmth even in the cold.

he lifted himself up, arms like jelly but with a bland hint of strength; he pulled up and into the treehouse, falling in head first.

he tumbled in, eyes shut tight. unnecessary but happening; he wait still, with bated breath.

thunder roars outside and rain pours loudly, lightning strikes in dreamy hues of white and yellow against the grey blue skies--mostly grey with fluffed out edges in hauntingly stormy clouds.

taeyong shivers with both relief and cold--clothes left to stick to his body like a second skin with merciless rain as the cause.

he sneezes, rubs his nose gently, and finally the grand unveiling occurs.

he opens his eyes.

and it's all a blur.

every detail he'd become so dearly accustomed to is barely recognizable. everything is terribly faint and barely coloured--like the paintings jaehyun would create on lazy sundays with too watered down paint and rough brushes that he never bothered to clean.

taeyong feels a sickly prickle at his bleary eyes and sobs into his dirtied hands; a rush of hot tears pour down his face along with long forgotten rain drops. he's tired. "I'm tired!" he sobs, tired of everything. he's sick of his stupid sister and her stupid cat, of his suddenly humbled father and his too-sweet-to-be-true mother.

he's sick of the healthy meals and hopeful "there might be a cure"s. of the folded laundry, already put away--of the sudden incapability to do anything for himself. of being alone even with family around.

he's perceived as a weakling, he's thought of as too pretty, no one knew who he really was and now? well he's ing going blind now. so he's just that blind from the house by a bar.

he curls up on his side, the side of his mud smudged face meeting the cold floor--small indents on softened wood bringing nothing but a sour taste to his mouth. he's a up in a ed up world--just great. nothing goes good for him. he cries for what feels like hours.

forever and a heartbreak later his head clears, finally he's pulled into the comfort of memory filled wood and wet earth, wafting in from the cracks in the walls. his heartbeat finally calms, his sobs stop, and his tears grow cold before drying. he's calm, no longer angry--though it peacefully resides in the depths of his heart; he's calm.

he's relieved of his burdens.

he's free.

the day had seemingly lost its excitement--but the storm had only gotten worse.

thunder boomed, bellowing out mighty roars of upset as spider webs of stringy lights spread throughout the glass-like sky; shattering its ever peaceful flood of rain and--taeyong yelps in shock, watching fearfully as several bolts of lightning touch the earth.

crackles and snaps, booms and loud cries falling from flowery woman's mouth--a loud snap, branches rustling and animals scattering' thumps and thuds and cold rain. a tree falls, fire on its wet extremities--leaves burning from healthy green to a sickly black--the tree rustles, seemingly taking a tumble, taeyong doesn't understand until it's quiet and cold.

last thing he remembers is the crumble of wood and collapse of the boards beneath him before everything goes black.

he feels like he's being crushed--buried alive even. his breaths are short, and he feels cold and light and so, so dizzy... he's under the pressure of a flowery woman's wrath, but he doesn't know.

the crunch of leaves and shouts plus the loosely patterned drop of rain reach his ears; muffled.

he feels a tug at his arm, pain shoots down to his waist before dulling out into a little shudder--he can't open his eyes, but brightness shines onto his eyelids and invades his inky dark dreams--he rolls them when muffled but speedy words are shout, and erratic, stuttery sentences are thrown his way; "I can't hear you ." and of course, they can't hear him either.

and then another tug--but at his leg this time, and he's slowly, cautiously to his back--but then another rough pull comes for his leg, he doesn't quite like how he feels; like he's being dragged out from underneath something. he furrows his eyebrows in confusion as cold and wet touch him once more. when warm droplets touch his face and a feminine voice lets out muffled words of fear to a masculine one, he finds himself even more confused.

and then the pressure dissipates into white noised nothingness.

pain--well, pain is an understatement when little bolts of said word spreads from his ankle to his shoulder, yet finds itself growing in his chest, sticking onto his ribs--he feels a headache coming on, and just a mouthful of curses try to bubble up but he can't speak; and suddenly, he can't breathe.

hands push heavily at his chest, a mouth--lips soft, almost familiar--meets his, attempting to breath him back to life; huffs and heaves surround him, his chest feels crushed as hands push and push--until he almost robotically sits up and all but pukes his soul out, hand automatically grasping the larger one on his chest. he gasps for air, shivering and in pain when a rain drenched blanket envelops him and he's picked up, body embraced with care and warmth.

his head lolls around as he opens his eyes and tries to focus, peering up at the stranger curiously. his eyes flicker to and fro, and the blur never fades--but he, just barely, make out alarmed, sparkling brown eyes and pale skin; eyes piercing yet soft, gently coloured brown and almost like stars--something that stuck with him oddly.

the stranger--taeyong'll call him stargazer--gave him a bitter smile and hastily ran up to what seemed to be a car, shouting behind him that whomever should hurry up. he looks beyond stargazer and sees a woman, hair put up and clothes too fancy for her to let the rain ruin--she speeds up, stopping right in front of him and pushing her face close.

"this is why I keep you home."

a sprained ankle and sutures in his knee, it took half a month to heal--courtesy of his overbearing family--which was less than the predicted healing time diagnosis. he was grateful, but that was all he took--he wouldn't accept anything more from them.

but of course, they didn't care. "I'm going to the police department." he declares, after his family had a fit of tears and tried to sway him to never visit the treehouse again. "I need to do something." he explains shortly, before anyone questions him. but before he can utter another word his sister is snatching the car keys out of his hand, "are you crazy!?" she exclaims, "there's no way I'm letting you drive!"

"not with those eyes of yours."

he's taken by the thin of his frail wrist and led to the car, "sit." she says after opening the door, staring expectantly and with an authorative and demanding look; he silently does as he's told and plops down onto the cold leather seat, her mummer more than just a simple sentence of worry to him.

the hum of the engine is almost comical in the silence as the car makes its way to the police department--"why do you want go there?" she asks, he doesn't reply.

a moment passes, she asks again--"because I need help, obviously!" he feels like she takes his words deeper than they should be taken, her smug look evidence; "of course."

the rest of the ride is a bore, the scenery passing by like a blur as he attempts to make out the city streets and artificial nature through the tinted car windows. when the car stops, he ignores the lingering glare in his eyes--blames it on the light shine of a glum Sunday sun on him.

he sighs at the small, modern police department; the glassy walls and fine metal plates lining the door drawing a sudden peak of nervousness to grow high inside him. he doesn't get a chance to calm himself as she unbuckles his seatbelt and pulls him up onto his feet, takes his hand like she would in their younger days and dragged him to the door; like the small shops lining their quaint street, a small bell chimes above them--taeyong doesn't think that quite fits such a chic looking building.

he makes out the closest desk, cluttered with files and empty coffee cups--like it jumped straight out of a hipster episode of law and order, where the cop has to deal with some mediocre case before it leads to a bigger one.

the glimmer of a cheap gold plaque catches his eye, but the name engraved in it too far to read--his sister pulls at him with urgency, just dying to hear what had her oh-so-handicapped little brother had to say. taeyong sighs, watching his feet as they move in a stiff dance to the desk, he glances up when the cheap plastic cover of the desk meets his thighs.

jung yoonoh, that's this officer's name--though it seems like he's more of a park ranger than anything.

a small cough and the typical 'click-clack' of busy hands on computer keyboards fills the room, his sister nudges him