Hyungwon was 17.

Every evening from Wednesday to Sunday, he would accompany his mother for a jog. She told Hyungwon that it was to keep both of them fit and healthy. Even though Hyungwon didn’t seem to be very convinced, he followed her anyway knowing the fact that his mother would definitely find a nasty way to get his out of the house. There was no point refusing.

At some point in time, Hyungwon regretted agreeing to this.

Hyungwon’s mum knew that Hyungwon was a slow runner. She would leave Hyungwon behind every time, running at her own pace. She never knew Hyungwon would stop running every time he is out of her sight, taking a seat at a bench near to a grass field in the park. He would pick up his phone and start playing the lame games that were barely able to entertain him for around 20 minutes, which is the time his mother would assume he should be back. Oddly, she never questioned why Hyungwon wasn’t really sweaty every time he “finished his run”.

On his first day of escaping, Hyungwon already started noticing that the same guy would be sitting at the bench opposite of him every time Hyungwon is here. Hyungwon also noticed that he would always be reading a book at the bench.

Brown hair. Fair skin. Pretty features.

Hyungwon can’t help but stare at him during all the times he went to the park and escaped from his mother. There was something about this boy that attracted his attention.  He wasn’t sure whether it’s because of how focused he looked when he is reading, or how his hair looks like they are softer than cotton candy, or simply because he has such a pretty face.

Initially, Hyungwon was worried that one day he might get caught for staring at the brown-haired boy but after a while he realised that there was no need to because the boy never seemed to notice or be affected by his surroundings at all. He was always very absorbed with the book he was reading. Besides, he always has his earpiece on.

After a week of contemplating, Hyungwon finally convinced himself that he should pick up the courage to talk to that boy he took notice of for 2 weeks.

You never know when he’s going to stop coming. It’s now or never.                               

Hyungwon came prepared. He didn’t want to come off as a rude person to the boy he wanted to be friends with. Knowing that he always wears his earpiece, Hyungwon decided that it would be better if he just wrote to the boy instead of requesting him to take off his earpiece.

He brought a stack of sticky notes.

Following the same routine, Hyungwon stopped running once he reached the grass field area. To his relief, the boy was still there and also still reading a book.

You can do this. You can do this. You can do this.

Hyungwon chanted internally as he gingerly took a seat at the edge on the right side of the bench the boy was sitting on. Hyungwon peeked at the boy to see his reaction.

Nothing.

Hyungwon quickly proceeded with his plan before he started thinking about chickening out. He wrote on a piece of sticky note and peeled it off the stack, pasting it on the bench right beside the boy’s right thigh and placing the pen with it.

Hello :-) I’m Hyungwon..

Hyungwon’s heart rate started increasing rapidly as he saw the boy shift his attention from the book to the note stuck beside him. A hint of smile appeared on the boy’s face. He took a look at Hyungwon before peeling the sticky note off the bench. He pasted it on the book he was reading and started scribbling below Hyungwon’s words. Hyungwon stared at the floor, tapping his fingers on his thighs nervously as he waited for a reply. He then saw the sticky note stuck beside his thigh with the pen.

Hello :-) I’m Hyungwon..

Hi I’m Minhyuk:)                                                                                                                                    

Hyungwon smiled widely as he read the sticky note. He was relieved that Minhyuk was willing to talk to him and quickly wrote back.

Hello :-) I’m Hyungwon..

Hi I’m Minhyuk:)

I hope we can be friends, Minhyuk.

Minhyuk read the note and smiled at Hyungwon briefly. He took a look at his watch before pasting the note on the first page of the book he was reading. He then stood up and waved goodbye to Hyungwon cheerfully, disappearing down the trail soon after. Everything happened so quickly that it was hard for Hyungwon to comprehend. He never felt so happy in a long time.

Hyungwon regained his composure as he realized that he was going to be late for meeting his mother. His mother is probably going to nag to him for running slower than usual.

Following the day they first interacted, they always used sticky notes to communicate for the next few weeks. They would keep passing the sticky notes, talking about random things and getting to know each other.

Hyungwon was still confused as to why Minhyuk never actually took out his earpiece so that they could speak to each other verbally. Not that Hyungwon minded passing sticky notes to him, but he was too curious.

What music are you listening to?

Nothing interesting. You wouldn’t want to hear it.

Come on, I won’t judge you.

I’ll share it with you when I’m ready:)

Hyungwon was puzzled.

When I’m ready? What does that even mean?

It had been quite a long while since they started talking. Despite how close they have became then just by passing sticky notes, Hyungwon still felt butterflies every time he was with Minhyuk.

Still interested in hearing the song I’m listening to…?

Hyungwon remembers how happy he felt when Minhyuk was finally willing to share with him something he had been refusing to talk about for so long. He was secretly hoping that he could finally hear Minhyuk’s voice as well.

Minhyuk was quietly staring at Hyungwon as Hyungwon faced him and nodded enthusiastically. He pulled the left side of the earpiece out of his ear and passed the ear bud to Hyungwon. Hyungwon eagerly placed the earpiece in his ear.

Silence.

He looked at Minhyuk once again, flashing a confused face. Minhyuk took the stack of sticky notes, scribbled, peeled it off and nervously pasted it beside Hyungwon’s thigh.

I make people think that I can’t hear them because

I’m wearing an earpiece. They don’t know that I

can’t hear them without wearing an earpiece either.

Hyungwon stared at the piece of sticky note long enough for Minhyuk to think that his worst nightmare was coming true - Hyungwon doesn’t want to be his friend anymore.

Hyungwon read the words over and over again to make sure that he wasn’t reading the note wrongly.

No way.

He felt stupid for not realizing this earlier.

Sensing how anxious Minhyuk was, Hyungwon wrote on another sticky note and slapped it on Minhyuk’s arm playfully.

Don’t worry. I’ll be here right beside you no matter what.

Minhyuk smiled happily at the note and stuck it at the first page of the book he was reading. He then waved goodbye to Hyungwon before walking down the trail to the exit.

It felt like déjà vu.

Fast forward to 4 year later, Hyungwon’s mum gave up jogging long time ago. Hyungwon didn’t feel like visiting the park either.

He regretted agreeing to jog with his mum in the first place.

It was painful enough when he found out that the path to his university passes by the park that held one year’s worth of memories. Memories that were hard to forget.

Every night before Hyungwon sleeps, he would lie on his left side where he would face the bedside table. He wouldn’t go to sleep without reading the sticky notes that he pasted on the side of his bedside table where he could see it. The sticky note lost it adhesiveness after a while and Hyungwon had to constantly paste it back on with sticky tapes.

Hey Hyungwon :)

I hope you are seeing this note and not the cleaners at the

park because I spent an entire day thinking about how I

should break this to you. I’m leaving for Germany by the time

you see this. I will be going through surgery there to get

cochlear implants & also go through speech therapy.

I want you to know that you are the reason why I’m doing this.

I was never willing to go through those torturous procedures

because of how expensive and pointless they were since I was

used to being mute and deaf anyway but I realised how much I

want to hear your voice and how much I want to speak to you

normally & have a proper conversation.

This may take a long time and honestly, I’m not sure when

I’ll be back but rest assured, I’ll return so I don’t want you to

feel sad. Also, you never actually told me about your feelings

and I can only find out after I come back but I want you to

know that…I love you. And I hope the day comes where I can

say it to you in my own voice.

                                                                                    - Minhyuk -

It was a mix of sadness and anger. But Hyungwon knows he can never get angry at Minhyuk because there was no reason to. He was too pure. Too angelic.

Hyungwon couldn’t take the sudden news well. He cried for days till he lost count. He couldn’t believe that Minhyuk didn’t even leave a number or just a skype username so that they could keep in touch. He was almost convinced that Minhyuk lied about never forgetting him. He almost wanted to give up waiting for Minhyuk.

Almost.

School was as torturous as the path to get there. Every day was the same boring routine.

Walk to school.

Get to class.

Sleep during breaks.

Walk home.

On the first week of university, Hyungwon had his orientation and surprisingly managed to make a new friend. He was too quiet and others didn’t dare to speak to him. Maybe it’s because of the scary dark circles under his tired eyes or his resting face.

His new friend was weird enough to want to make friends with him.

“Hyungwon, when will I see you eat during breaks?”

“Never.” Hyungwon’s voice was muffled as he was sleeping on his arms on the canteen table.

“Isn’t there any way I can make you eat? I’m not joking when I said you are looking more and more like a skeleton.”

Hyungwon raised his head to glare at his friend before going back to his sleeping position.

“Shut up Wonho.”

“Hey! Be nice to your only friend in this school.”

Hyungwon groaned in reply. He was too lazy to care.

It took Hyungwon 6 months to open up about Minhyuk to Wonho and Wonho finally understood why Hyungwon looked gloomy half the time they spent together.

“So does he know that you like him back?”

“Nope.” Hyungwon voice was filled with regret.

“I’m sure he’ll be back soon, and then you tell him how you liked him probably waaaaaaay before he did.” Wonho smiled comfortingly at Hyungwon.

“It has been 3 years, Wonho. I’m not so sure if he’ll be back.”

“I beg to differ. On the bright side, you still have me for now.”

Hyungwon was glad that he still had someone to rely on even though he lost his ray of sunshine.

Hyungwon started hanging out with Wonho on most days after school.  Wonho would bring him to an internet café Wonho’s uncle owned on Fridays. On other days, they would either play basketball or go to the gym near their school. Hyungwon had to succumb to Wonho’s habit of working out almost daily.

He also started eating a little during lunch break despite the disgusting taste of canteen food.

“I can never understand how you can enjoy eating this rubbish every day.”

“Shut up Hyungwon.”

They got along better than Hyungwon thought they would.