*My only sin was being in your way*
*Why couldn't you protect me? What kind of Aamon are you?*
*Did I die just for you to continue being useless?*
*How many people could you have saved if you were just more competent??*
*Are you sure you're strong enough?*

"Taehyung?"
I look away from the window, distracted from my reverie as the voices in my head slowly fade into silence. I smile as Jungkook comes in, holding a pair of sneakers in each hand.
"Hey, baby."
He holds both pairs of sneakers up to show me, one being bright red Jordan's and another a pair of bright orange Nikes. "Which one should I use for your meeting later?"
"Do you have any loafers?"
Jungkook pouts right then, his arms falling to his side. "Loafers are boring."
"Loafers are formal wear," I remind him. "You can wear sneakers during training."
"But I won't get to show them off," he whines.
"Wealth should not be your focus."
"You wear Dior and Gucci daily!"
"Because they are formal wear," I patiently answer. "Are we really going to argue about this?"
"You never let me do what I want!" the little one suddenly shrieks, before he stomps out of the room, slamming the door behind him.

*He doesn't love you.*
*He hates you.*
*It's so obvious.*

I close my eyes, drawing in a shaky breath as I ignore the whispers. I open them, resting my chin against my propped up hand. The whispers were getting louder by the day and they were reaching a point of being distracting. I knew they weren't real and they were just effects of trauma, but listening to them constantly was starting to put a damper on my mood.
Jin pops in just then, dressed smartly in a suit and tie and - thankfully - loafers.
"Is it just me or does Jungkook act more and more like a teenager these days?" I say as he retrieves the documents from the table.
"The boy is nine," Jin answers, skimming through the papers before he finds the one he's looking for. He slips it out, reading it in his hand. "You can't expect him to keep acting like a baby."
"But he's *my* baby," I sigh, leaning deeper into my chair. "He doesn't have to grow up so fast."
"Nine courts," Jin mumbles under his breath before he places the document back and rearranges the papers. "That's what children do," he continues, raising his voice slightly. "- grow up and break their parents' hearts. That's definitely what I did."
"Good thing my parents are dead."

*They would have been ashamed of you anyway. Worthless Aamon.*

I blink in surprise, just as Jin turns to me.
"That's… really dark."

*Even he thinks you're a burden.*

"Stop it," I snap, more to myself than to anyone else.
"What?" Jin says, squinting his eyes in suspicion.
"Nothing."
He quickly glances around the room. "Is there a spirit here?"
"Yes," I seamlessly lie, smiling reassuringly. "It's just kind of distracting."
"Do you need to settle its matters?" he asks, which was basically codename for 'do I have to eff off so you can start talking to yourself?'.
"Not for now," I answer.
"Then let's head for your meeting. All the respective Heads are here."
"Aren't we early?" I say, glancing at the clock. The meeting was supposed to start in seven minutes.
"So are they. Let's go."

**

Jin holds the door open for me as I walk through and enter my Court's newly renovated meeting room. Nine Heads of Court sit around the table, a pair of their own respective guards standing behind them. I see Yoochun and Yunho amongst the Heads. The Victor is seated to their left. Jungkook is seated directly next to the sole empty chair around the table. He is representing his own court today. They stand and bow in greeting as I enter and I bow in return, before taking my seat around the circular table.
I had to commend Jungkook on the sheer cleverness of the table's design, meaning that no Court would actually argue about the position at the head of the table. Courts held a ridiculously sensitive view on positions of power and simple seating arrangements would have been enough for full blown discourse to happen.
"Respectable Heads of Court," I greet, pulling my chair in. "I thank you for your attendance on such short notice."
"The Faerie Court congratulate you on the establishment of your new Court," the Head starts. "We are honoured to grace your abode."
"As are we," Yoochun speaks up. "What is the reason you have called for such a sudden meeting, Your Highness?"
I signal to Jin, who places the stack of documents before me.
"I require your agreement in a matter I find to be of utmost importance." I take one stapled stack of papers for myself, before passing it directly to the Head of Court next to me. They get my signal, retrieving a copy for themselves before passing it on.
"There was no prior discussion between us on this matter?" The Victor points out, taking his documents before passing them on.
"No," I say. "This is a matter decided by my own hand."
I am quietly surprised the Victor had came for this meeting - that he would even look me in the eye after the events that transpired with Layla. I'd left the Court without a word, leaving a trail of death and destruction behind me. His loyal advisor, Hector and many of his guards had been killed because Layla wanted to attract my attention. I'd seen their bodies.
Or pieces of them.
I allow several moments for them to read the documents, quietly bracing for their reactions.
"Your Highness," Yunho is the first to speak as he stares at the papers. "This is…"
"A dissolution order," the Victor finishes, just as the murmurs from the Heads of Court start.
"Your Highness," Yoochun says, speaking over the rest of the Heads, "I don't quite understand -"
"I am dissolving all partnerships involving the Aamon's Court," I explain. "I have realised that it is too dangerous for the Aamon to be involved in the matters of other Courts. The Asian Hunter's Court faced a massacre because an Otherworldly individual sought to strike me out. Your own Courts have countless soldiers dead in order to protect me. I have decided that for the safety of the public at large, all partnerships with the Aamon's Court will cease. My Court will immediately withdraw from all Court affairs."
"What of the Asian Lycan Court?" Another Head asks.
"I have relinquished my position as the Acting Alpha and have passed the title to the advisor."
"The Heir is still under your care?" Yoochun asks, glancing at Jungkook.
"The Heir to the Asian Lycan Court acts in his own capacity, to be guided by his advisor. His relation to me will not affect his future rule."
There is silence from half the Heads and opposition from the other half.
"Your Highness," a Head of Court says, "we cannot agree that an individual of your power chooses to only remain neutral in chances of possible conflict."
"I will not remain neutral. I will stand against oppression and injustice, but I will not be executing favours and play an active role in the scales of power. If a Court purporting to be my ally threatens another and uses my support as a threat against them, then I have failed my duty as the Aamon."
"A Court without partnership stands weak in the scales of power," the Victor quietly reminds.
"Like I said," I explain. "The scales of power are not my concern. I ensure peace and justice on this earth and the hereafter. I will not risk your safety, or anyone else's in my name."
"After all we have done for you, this is how you repay us?"
I swallow my tongue. The Victor had all reason to be angry at me. I'd be throttling my own neck if I were him. I needed to remain calm so I could end this on good terms.
"If monetary compensation is what you demand," I start, "my Court will provide it accordingly."
"The Asian Hunter's Court has provided you imperative aid when many others shunned you."
"I am not denying the aid you have given me. But you are only placing your Courts in more danger by siding with mine."
There is the sound of a pen scrapping against paper and heads collectively turn to the source of the sound. Jungkook is signing the dissolution order, acting as his own Head of Court.
He places the cover back on the fountain pen, looking up to the faces staring at him.
"His Highness King Taehyung is right," Jungkook says, pushing the bundle of documents forward. "A partnership with his Court may be dangerous to both parties. We should not be risking our men when the amount of enemies against him extends beyond our comprehension."
I glance down at Jungkook's shoes for no reason. He's wearing neon orange sneakers.

*See? He DESPISES you.*

Another sound of pen against paper and we shift focus to Yunho, whose signature ends with a flourish.
"I agree to the dissolution order not because I agree with the Asian Lycan Court, but I respect the Aamon's decision and trust that it will be for the betterment of our people."
Another round of discussion starts from the other disagreeing Courts, but ultimately, they each agree to sign.
The last amongst them is of course, the Victor.
The Victor would always have a special - if not somewhat strange - place in my heart. A family friend of my late parents, Jin had placed responsibility of looking after an infant me upon him when Ezekiel had refused to take me in. The Victor accepted - not from the goodness of his heart, but because he knew that there was the off chance that I'd grow up to be Aamon one day - and he'd wanted a feel of the status and power.
I'd grown under his guidance and watchful eyes for years. Although I was mostly raised by his hired nannies, the Victor was almost always around me, an eagle-eyed guardian ready to bite me if I toed out of line.
And stranger still, despite the years of living with him, we had no affection for each other. I would say the Victor tolerated me, and I, him. We were never close and we never made an attempt to try to be.
But still, I owed much of my life to him. I grew up healthy, strong and trained because of him, and he provided me more than enough necessities as a child to mould me into the person I am today.
I would never admit it out loud, but his approval of this order would mean the most to me.
Finally, he takes the pen and signs at the bottom of the document. I hide a quiet sigh in relief. I catch Jin glance at me as he starts collecting the documents again.
I thank the Heads for their time and presence, before each Head of Court exits the meeting room with their guards, until it is only Jin, Jungkook, Yoochun and Yunho and I in the room.
"How will the Aamon Court function now as a standalone?" Yunho asks, coming towards me.
"If you suspect ulterior motives, I have none," I say, standing as Yunho stands before me. "I'm just doing what I think is best."
Yoochun comes to stand beside Yunho. "I know," Yunho says. "I'm asking as a friend. How will your Court function?"
"We'll do fine. We've been through worse."
"And our prior agreement?" Yoochun asks.
"Prior agreements will be fulfilled," I reply. "But no future ones will be made."
Yoochun smiles, maybe in relief. "Thank you, Taehyung."
Jungkook skips over to us, coming to Yoochun to wrap him in a hug.
"Hello, my little wolf child," the Sovereign hums, reciprocating the hug as he kisses Jungkook's temple. "How are you?"
"I'm fine," Jungkook answers, breaking away.
"Why are you in sneakers?"
"Ummm, I don't like loafers."
"If you were in any other Court meeting, you'd be kicked out with that attire. You're lucky Taehyung always gives you leeway."
"It's just some shoes."
"Not in politics," Yoochun points out, gently tapping Jungkook's nose. "Don't risk your Courts."
"Okay," the little one pouts, jutting his lower lip out.
I roll my eyes. So he can listen to Yoochun but not me?
Yunho catches my eyeroll, smirking as he crosses his arms.
"Listen to your elders, Jungkook. If you don't dress like a leader, people won't treat you like a leader. And you must be taken seriously, as future Alpha of your court and acting representative for the Aamon. Do you understand?"
Jungkook nods again. His ego looks like it's taken a blow.
Yunho glances at me, winking. Jungkook takes his leave, needing to go back to his Court to update his people.
"Thanks for that," I sigh. "His rebellion is coming through."
"My sweet Jungkook?" Yoochun gawks. "He would never hurt a fly."
"It's his growing years. He's finding his own place," Yunho says. "My younger siblings are teenagers now. Screaming in the house is… mandatory." The Vampire King grimaces at the memory.
"We wish you luck in your future endeavors, Taehyung," Yoochun says. "If you need our help… we're a teleportation spell away."
"I hope you won't need our help too soon," Yunho muses. "You're a powerful individual in your own right."
"Thanks," I say, "for believing in me." I meant it. I truly did.
I hold out my hand for a shake. It was customary for the Aamon to avoid handshakes - or any form of contact from others. The Aamon was pure - untouchable and ineffable. Touches from outsiders were frowned upon.
It was a dumb custom.
Yunho takes my hand, smiling warmly.
I am hit with an indescribable pain the moment our hands touch and I gasp in shock. Yunho reacts the same, his hand instinctively clenching mine, tightly enough that I feel my bones crack. His eyes glow purple, and flashes of foreign memories hit me. I don't know who these people are and I don't know what's going on but I feel pain - a lot of pain. I scream, and I think Yunho does the same, before a burst of defensive power hits me and I am thrown back.
"Taehyung!" Jin catches me before I even hit the ground, the both of us tumbling in a mess of limbs. I sit up just as Yoochun pulls Yunho up to stand.
What was that? What happened?
"What did you do?" I yell, cradling my broken hand to my chest.
"I didn't do anything." Yunho is panting as Yoochun rests a concerned hand against his back.
Jin has a protective arm around my waist, using his other hand to take my wrist and blow on the broken bones. The bones restructure, rearranging themselves as the fracture heals.
"What did you see?" Yunho asks, voice low as Jin helps me stand.
"Your memories," I answer. I didn't realise I was shaking. Jin steadies me. "What did you?"
"The voices in your head."

*SICK CHILD*

I feel myself go pale. Jin turns to me, a questioning look in his eyes.
"Taehyung," Yunho starts, "your mind is -"

*CRAZY CHILD*

"Leave."
Yunho looks up at me, surprise in his eyes. Jin's hand falls away from my waist and he takes a cautious step back, eyes on me.
"It's corrupted," Yunho continues, "by your own trauma."
Even Yoochun turns to me, hesitant and confused.
"Please leave."

*UNWORTHY AAMON*

I press my hands against my ears, trying to block out the sound of the voices.
"Taehyung, we can help you," Yunho says. "We have experts who can heal this ailment."

*LOOK AT HIM MOCKING YOU*

"Taehyung!" Jin is calling me as I back up a step. I was getting increasingly stressed out, knowing that I had to be glowing with power as all three stare at me like I'm a ticking time bomb.

*FOOL*

I scream right then, the power taking over me, threatening to explode and cause a lot of damage when Yunho suddenly runs forward, wrapping a secure hand around my throat.
"SLEEP," he commands, staring straight into my eyes.
Did he honestly think that just because he said so, my body would somehow -

**

*Yunho, run!*

*He's dead, Yoochun*

*I sentence you with treason, and punish you with death, Father*

I bolt upright, Yunho's memories running through my mind, as fresh as vivid as the day the event happened. That handshake had blasted me with the worst of his memories, and they keep replaying in my head as if stuck on loop.
I close my eyes, trying to control my breathing.
I realise that I'm on a very comfortable bed in my own bedroom. They must have shifted me. I lie back down, forcing myself to calm down. I'm still pretty out of it so I stare up at the ceiling. There is silence in my head, which hasn't happened in a while.
"Mama, you're awake."
I turn to Jungkook, who's lying right beside me, his cheek resting against his palm as he stares at me. He's just waking up, his eyes still swollen with sleep. "I am."
"I'm happy."
"How long was I out?"
"Just over four hours."
I sigh, running a hand through my hair. "Where's Jin?"
"He's away. How are you feeling? Yoochun told me what happened."
I close my eyes. I don't know what to say to that. I am ashamed and angry that I'd succumbed to what I'd been trying to avoid.
"I'm okay," I say, smiling at Jungkook as I open my eyes. "I've always been okay."
My little one's eyes water as he stares at me, sniffling loudly in the silence of our room. "I'm sorry, Taehyung," he mewls. "I couldn't take care of you. I hurt you and act childishly and make you stressed."
"No, you don't," I answer. "You don't."
"I had to argue with you over some dumb shoes and make you upset and then storm out of the room and -"
"Hush," I interrupt him. "It's alright."
"It's not alright," he argues, wiping a tear away. "I want to be here for you."
"You are. You always are."
"Have you always been hearing voices in your head?" he meekly asks.
"Ever since I got back from Heaven," I say, "my mind is just not at peace. I hear people saying bad things about me."
"You're not bad," Jungkook argues. "You're the most selfless person I know."
"Thank you, baby. I guess my mind just doesn't believe that."
"Will a hug make you feel better?"
I smile, both touched and amused by my little one's simplistic approach to life.
The bedroom door opens, and Jin enters, Caine by his side. I sit up in due respect to our guest.
"Taehyung," Caine greets.
"Caine. I thought you had duties to attend to."
"I did," he answers, coming to my bed and sitting on the mattress. "But more important matters were at hand."
"What matters?"
He raises an eyebrow, and it takes me a few seconds to register.
Oh. He meant me.
I turn to Jin.
"He had to be informed." He passes a letter to me, sealed with wax. It's engraved with the Vampire King's emblem. I open the letter, seeing only one short sentence before Yunho's signature at the bottom.
'We'll call you in two days.'
I close the letter, holding it in my hand as I pull my legs up to my chest.
"How did Yunho know?" I start. "How did he get access into my mind?" I know for a fact that my mental walls are up and secure. I've always been trained to block mental invasions from other parties because control over a conscience would be control over the body. If Yunho had breezed through them by accident, as he so claimed, then I was in a lot of danger.
"For those with telepathic abilities, Taehyung, your mind sounds like a thousand screaming banshees," Jin reveals.
I stare at him, insecure and hesitant. "Really?"
"Yes," Caine confirms. "In fact, it's hard to actually hear you speak over the volume of your mind."
"Your stress is taking a toll on your control of the power, whether you realize it or not. Someone with as much telepathic power as the Vampire King only had to touch you before your mental walls exploded."
"How is he?"
"Frazzled, but unharmed."
I sigh in relief at Jin's answer. "I guess this is why custom states I can't touch anyone," I say, before turning to Caine. "What did Heaven say?"
Caine crosses his legs, resting a hand against his knee. "Heaven recognizes that part of this…predicament you're facing is due to what you have been through as Aamon. Your training in Heaven, your battles to safeguard the peace on Earth and the Afterlife... A Healer will be sent to heal you in due time. For now, just rest. That should be your number one priority."
I stare. Easy for him to say. "Okay," I say instead. "What did the other Aamons say?"
"You know what Adam thinks," Caine says, chuckling mirthlessly. "But Pakal and Sobekneferu wish you well. They send their regards."
I nod as Caine stands. "I'll take my leave now. Take a break from your duties, Taehyung. I'll see you next week."
He opens up a portal, walking through it before it disappears completely. I take a moment to take everything in.
A Healer. An Angel? In here? Would this Court even be able to withstand its presence?
"What time is it?"
"Twelve."
I slide off the bed, heading to the bathroom to wash my face as both Jungkook and Jin quietly stare. It's only when I enter my walk-in closet to change do they prompt their questions.
"What are you doing?"
"Where are you going?"
"In case you forgot, I have a meeting with PETRA at five today." I slip on my blazer before grabbing my watch. Jin and Jungkook only continue staring.
"I'm going to cancel your meetings," Jin, a.k.a Mr Secretary says.
"Caine told you to rest," Jungkook points out.
"From my Heavenly duties maybe, but my matters still need to be settled here on Earth. We don't have the flexibility of cancelling our meetings."
"Taehyung -"
"If I don't keep my mind off of it, it will get worse," I quietly say, tying my hair up in a half ponytail. "So just let me be."

**

I walk down the stairs to my library.
The library doubled as my research room. There was still a lot that I didn't know and reading up was important before I could properly execute decisions. Jin had spent a whole day merely gathering and arranging the books, sorting each by subject, and then colour. It would take a few hundred years for me to finish reading every book in the room.
After the events involving Layla and the members of PETRA, I'd quickly decided that it would be best to disassociate the Aamon's Court from other Courts. I'd established my own Court within days, with the help of Sikyung and Jin, quickly moving into the new abode.
I'd be damned to stay a moment longer in my old Court and staying in Jungkook's was out of the question. So I'd merely moved, heading to an entirely new continent and bought myself a place to stay and made it my residence.
It had been one of the few things I'd enjoyed after returning from Heaven. I'd bought horses and furniture and paint and books and for exactly four days, everything was bliss. We were so busy setting up the manor that I had no time for those voices. I had no time for insomnia, or insecurity or nightmares. I built my palace, designing and crafting it into my dream home and then I moved into it.
I designed my own kitchen, gave Jungkook his own bedroom for the first time in his life and filled my fridge with groceries of my own. Everything was bliss, and everything was alright.
And then those four days ended and I am thrown once again, into my life as Aamon.
I reach the bottom of the stairs, staring at the figure whose back was turned to me. He stands near my research table, staring at several books I'd left open because they'd seemed important at the time.
Only three people live in this manor - excluding Jungkook whose official residence is technically his own Court. It's easy to narrow down who I'm staring at.
"What are you doing?"
Namjoon glances over his shoulder to look at me before he turns completely, smiling in greeting. "Hey."
I don't return the smile.
The only reason I'd allowed Namjoon to come with us was because both Jin and Jungkook refused to let him go. They'd been insistent, knowing Namjoon would get into a lot of trouble if PETRA got a hold of him. Personally, I wouldn't have had any issues with that.
Namjoon had offered safe haven to me and Jungkook when we joined BigHit and debuted together as BTS. We'd seen each other through the highest high and the lowest of the low as bandmates. I'd honestly thought he'd been killed when the Seraphim had attacked our concert while I was still an initiate, and I'd thought I'd be happy seeing him alive and well.
But I didn't trust him.
Namjoon had attacked the Victor's hotel and the Lycan Court. He'd endangered the people I'd loved and even though he saved them, I'm constantly reminded that he placed them in the predicament in the first place.
I knew the voices in my head weren't real and were only figments of my consciousness, but if my own consciousness agreed with me, then I had to be right at least to some degree.
I come to stand beside him, staring at my own open books, analyzing what he's just read.
"Sorry for intruding," he starts. "I needed to find a book for research and I gravitated to your table." At my continued silence, Namjoon continues the conversation. "You're reading up on power redistribution?"
"Yeah," I answer, forcing a smile as I turn to him. "Just an idea in my head that I have."
"Do you need my help?"
"No," I answer. I'm suddenly very tired, even though I've rested. "Thank you for the offer. Did you find your book?"
Namjoon nods, holding the book up. 'A Brief History of the Vampire and Hunter Conflict'.
"I need to get my work done. Do you mind leaving?"
"Oh, sure. I don't meant to disturb you."
"You aren't," I assure. "I just need…some space."
He asks no further questions, nodding as he backs up a step, before turning around and leaving. I wait for the sound of his footsteps to disappear before I sigh, resting my hands against the table as I lean my weight on my palms.
"You just kicked Namjoon out your library."
"No, I kindly asked him to leave."
I straighten just as Jin comes to stand by my side.
"Have patience, Taehyung," I hear him say. "Every time you see him, your emotions skyrocket."
"I don't trust him," I confess.
"Give him a chance. He risked his life for Jungkook and I."
"I know."
At that, I feel Jin turn to me. I don't bother looking up at him.
"I owe him my life."
"No, you don't. He was the one who got you captured in the first place."
"Yes. And then he had a change of heart."
"It doesn't change anything."
"He reminds me of myself."
"He is *nothing* like you."
Jin pauses.
"I'll keep an eye on him for you."
My worries quelled, I fall quiet, appreciating Jin's presence and the silence of the library.
"I worry for you," I hear him say after a while. "Ever since you got back from Heaven -"
"I've been weird?"
"You carry yourself with fear in your heart."
I straighten.
"I'm just being careful. I don't want my mistakes to repeat themselves," I say, as Jin turns me around to face him. I lean against the table as he stares at me, looking deep into my eyes as if he's searching.
"What happened in Heaven?"
"I told you," I start pushing him back, immediately uncomfortable with the question. "It's nothing. I just had a lot of training."
"You speak so lightly of it, yet you've been so different since coming back. What are you hiding?"
"I'm not hiding anything."
"Then tell me what happened in Heaven."
I stare at him. When he wanted something, Jin could twist the whole world to fit in the palm of his hand.
"Would you allow me to say no?"
"Yes."
I search his eyes for traces of the lie.
"I spoke to every soul who died because of me."
Jin furrows his brows, not getting it. "You didn't kill anyone."
"Every soul who died because of my incompetence as the Aamon."
Jin leans against the table, resting lightly against the edge. He crosses his arms as he stares at me.
"What did they say?"
"A lot of things," I quietly answer, the memory of meeting those hundreds of souls flashing before my eyes. "Some were accepting of their fate. Others…not so much. I keep thinking I could've saved them. Maybe if I tried a little harder."
"You cannot blame yourself, Taehyung."
I turn to stare into Jin's eyes. "Look into my soul. Tell me what you see."
Jin takes a moment. "Power. Potent and deadly."
"Too much unrestrained power. I have the ability to destroy this whole continent if I want to."
"But you won't."
" - if I can't control my powers."
"But you will."
I raise an eyebrow. "I nearly killed the Vampire King and his liege because of my panic attack. You really think I will?"
"Your power will lessen once you choose the next member of Parliament."
"That's another thing. I don't trust anyone enough to do it."
Jin says nothing. He takes my hand, gently pulling me forward until I stand before him.
"What worries you, Fifth Aamon?"
"I have a list. It's alphabetized."
Jin sighs quietly, staring off into the distance. I think he's thinking.
"I regret that I can't heal you. Not this time."
I sigh in turn, looking away from him. I feel Jin take my other hand as well, holding them both in his.
"But I can make you forget those problems momentarily."
I turn to him, curious. "How?"
"Come closer. I'll tell you."
I heed, just as Jin leans forward, resting his lips against mine. I'm taken aback, freezing as I flinch away from him. He stares into my eyes, and whatever spell he has up his sleeve works. I'm calm again as I stare back at him.
He leans forward again, a hand against my chin as he kisses me, as softly and as gently as the evening sun.
I kiss him back, feeling him wrap an arm around my waist and pull me against him.
What is it with Jin that disarmed me so?
My hands travel to his hair, carding through the locks as Jin's hold against me only tightens.
Mint and vanilla. How he's always tasted.
The warmth I feel from his touches travels straight into my soul, a soothing, definite presence that holds me reassuringly. I don't know if it's a spell, a power transfer, or if it's just him, but I am rested.
I'm alright.
His hands lower to my hips, suddenly lifting me up and straddling him. The kiss deepens as I wrap my legs around him, Jin's hands resting against my thighs.
My hands travel on their own. Pretty soon they are on his shirt, ing the top buttons and roaming the skin underneath.
I feel the gentle bumps and ridges that were his scars hidden from the n@ked eye. He had so many secrets to him.
Could I unravel them all?
Jin knicks my lower lip and I gasp, before feeling his t0ngue enter my m0uth. It is a welcome presence despite, and I smile between the kisses.
How does one person taste so addictive?
And he suddenly flips us. I'm suddenly seated on the table while he looms over me.
I flinch at the sudden change in position, dazed and confused as I instinctively lean away from Jin.
"I love you," I blurt out before I can even stop myself.
Jin pauses, staring blankly at me before a smirk slowly forms on his lips.
"You're turning pink," he points out.
"I literally have no idea what you're talking about."
That smirk forms a chuckle as he kisses me again. Whatever emotion I'd been feeling dispells as the intensity of the kiss distracts me. I lean back, resting my weight against my palms. I feel Jin's hand creep under my shirt, tracing lazy lines against my back. I reach up to hold him, placing my hands against his jaw when a thought suddenly crosses my mind and I panic, roughly pushing him away.
"Ah, shhit," I swear.
He blinks, confused at my reaction.
"I have a meeting with Sikyung at two. I nearly forgot that I have to go through some documents with him."
Jin physically relaxes at my words before he leans forward again, kissing my forehead. He straightens, starting to button up his shirt with one hand as his other hand fixes his hair.
I won't admit Jin looks good, but he looked *really* good doing that.
Well, he was right about forgetting my problems momentarily, because Jin was a *distraction*.
"The voices you hear are not their souls. You know they've moved on."
I stare.
"How do you know the voices in my head are the souls of those who died?"
He doesn't answer, but that's answer enough.
Instantly, whatever high I'd been feeling disappears. Jin takes access of my thoughts like he owns them. He kissed me just to distract me from the spell.
"I told you to stop doing that."
"I did what I had to do."
"You could've just asked."
"Would you tell?"
I get off the table, feeling my anger rise. "I can deal with it on my own."
"Can you?" Jin answers back. "After you nearly killed us all with your panic attack?"
"You have no right to access my mind like that!"
"I do when everyone's lives are at stake!"

*He's trying to kill you!*
*Watch out, watch out!*
*Kill him first!*

I feel the panic rising in me again and I fight to swallow it down, closing my eyes as I control my breathing.
I know the voices are not real. I know they can't really affect me if I just ignore them.
I press my hands against my ears, trying to block out their voices.
"Taehyung." I feel Jin rush forward, feel his warm, reassuring hands on my shoulders. "Look at me."
I'm panicking. The fear is rising, the voices are getting louder and I'm nearing another panic attack.
"Taehyung, I'm right here." I feel his hands on my cheeks, forcing me to look up. "Please look at me."
I open my eyes to blurry vision. I am literally about to cry as my eyes fill with tears.
"Taehyung."
I can't see him. I can feel him, I can hear him, I can still fcuking *taste* him on my lips, but I can't see him. It makes my panic escalate and I feel my power coursing through my veins, ready to attack anything it understood as a threat.
"I'm sorry," I hear Jin say as I start to glow. "I'm sorry. I love you. Taehyung, please."
I find myself calming down, my breathing returns to normal and I relax in his hold. My heart still beats erratically, but it wasn't going to cause a anytime soon.
Jin wraps his arms around me as soon as my power dissipates.
"It's alright," I hear him say. "It's okay."
I'm winded. The voices are quiet, almost as if Jin's voice managed to drown them out.
"Are they always there?"
"No," I reply, resting my head on his shoulder.
"You know they are just illusions."
"I do. But for how long?"
Jin tightens his hug. "I'm sorry. The injured mind is too delicate for my magic."
I feel my eyes well up with tears again.
How long was I going to be this dangerous? How long was I going to be this crazy?

**

"I still don't think it was wise to have the meeting here. Your Court is still young."
"We don't have a choice. It's not like you can teleport us to PETRA's headquarters," I sigh, crossing my arms over my chest as the four of us stare at the nearing convoy.
Or was that a small army? They looked like they had enough weapons.
"Look. I think they brought a tank," Jungkook whispers.
We stand with my Court behind us, out in the open fields. Jin stands to my left, Namjoon beside him. To my right, Jungkook gets into position. He's wearing loafers this time.
The small army finally stops, probably twelve jeeps in all. The main director is easily identifiable, being the only one in a suit and tie. Which was honestly kind of dumb. If he didn't trust us, why come unprotected?
The soldiers file out, positioning their weapons at us. I hadn't noticed the machine guns propped on the roof of each jeep, but now I sure did.
"Let's get this party started."
I watch as the director finally leaves his jeep, taking off his shades as he comes towards us to reach within normal human hearing range.
"He does realise it's night time, right?" I say.
"He's trying to assert himself as Alpha," Jungkook says.
"He looks stupid."
"Focus," Jin quietly warns as the director stops before us, pocketing his shades. He was standing like, five feet away? I didn't know humans were this deaf.
"Your Highness," he greets. "We finally meet."
I know who he is. This was the main director Namjoon had talked about, the one who had shot him and the one who'd threatened to shoot Jungkook. Also the one in charge of the decision of trapping Jungkook and Jin in glass jails.
I remember.
"Director Anthony. I've heard stories about you."
"I hope they are good," he smiles.
"They're not."
He doesn't even flinch, his smile still plastered on his face. "Well, any publicity is good publicity."
I say nothing, calling for the records I had in mind. They appear in my hand, a thick, brown paper file that contained the records of events with Layla.
"My representative spoke to you," I say. "He brought two requests forward. Will they be granted?"
"Of course, Your Highness. The privileges requested shall be granted."
I step forward, cautiously eyeing the soldiers that follow my every move. I stop about a meter away from the director, and I turn my focus to him.
"It has come to my attention that my representatives were mistreated by members of your organization."
"With all due respect, Your Highness, all our guests are treated equally." He has a relaxed smile on his face, a sort that I want to knock some teeth out. "And it has come to our attention that you house someone amongst our ranks. A traitor." I wait as his gaze shifts to someone behind me, undoubtedly Namjoon. "Kim Namjoon."
"Yes," I answer, calling on to my powers. "Namjoon will from here on out, be under the protection of the Aamon's Court."
"Namjoon is answerable to our organization for his actions," Director Anthony says. "He must be made accountable."
"If you want to talk about accountability," I say, letting my hands glow with power. "Let's talk about the fact that you threatened my Lycan ward with silver bullets." I know the light is travelling up my hands as the weather changes in response to my growing power. "The fact that you stripped away authority that I had granted him. The fact that you attacked my acquaintances and barge into my home to try and capture me. In that sense," I feel the Seraphim appear behind me, standing tall, stamping their staff into the ground. I see the soldiers hesitate. "I will hold you responsible and retaliate accordingly."
The main director glances up at the Seraphim before turning to me, smiling tightly. "There is no need for violence."
"Yes," I agree, knowing my eyes are starting to glow with power. "There is absolutely no need for violence. So you will drop your charges, and I will drop mine."
I see the calculative look in his eyes, see him consider whether it would be worth it to fight.
"You are disrespecting PETRA by demanding this," he says, tone non-threatening, but very much cautious.
"And you disrespected me," I remind him. "Hence, we shall keep the matter confidential. I will ask for no more favours from PETRA, should you leave my Court alone. This matter will die here."
"The people will talk," the director answers, "if they see Namjoon amongst your ranks."
"What is the talk of others to the safety of your own organization? If you do not agree, I will charge you accordingly. And we know how that will end." The Seraphim roar in dominance, a show of power and threat to the director and his soldiers.
"Leave us alone," I repeat. "And we'll leave you be."
Finally, the director nods. "PETRA will allow this one exception for the Aamon's Court."
I smile. "We are grateful." I hand him the file. "Everything you need regarding the events is available in there, including the clean up. I will send my representative to retrieve the file once you are ready. You may leave."
Director Anthony stares at me, part insulted, part calculative and part hesitant.
"Very well, Your Highness. May we meet in better circumstances."
I don't say a word as he turns his back to me, heading towards his convoy and speaks to one of the soldiers. I watch as he rides his jeep, the rest of the soldiers follow, and all of them collectively leave.
I let out a quiet sigh, feeling the gentle night breeze in my hair. I turn, walking back to my members of Court. The Seraphim have disappeared.
"They'll leave us alone for now."
"I'm kinda disappointed they didn't use the tank. I wanted to see how it works."
"You can see that on TV," Jin says.
"Yeah," Jungkook pouts, "but it's not the same."
Both Jin and Jungkook start walking back to the house, talking idly.

*One day, they'll come back.*
*They'll come back and kill the ones you love. Just like how you killed us.*

"Taehyung."
I snap out of it, turning to Namjoon.
"Are you okay?"
"No," I bluntly reply. "I'm very tired. Sunrise is in two hours. I just want to catch some sleep."
Namjoon smiles tightly. "Thank you," he says. "For helping me."
"I didn't do it for you."
"Doesn't matter if you didn't. I would be in a lot of trouble and pain if it weren't for you. If there's -"
"Stop it," I snap.
Namjoon shuts it, staring at me in confusion.
I mentally backtrack, immediately feeling apologetic for my outburst. "I'm sorry, Namjoon. I can't look at you without feeling anger. I don't know whether I can trust you."
"I'm not asking for your trust," Namjoon replies, careful of his words and tone. "But, you have my word that I won't take what you've done for me for granted. If there's any way that I can help you -"
"No," I say. "I don't want your hand in my affairs. Just do as you please and leave me alone."
Namjoon says nothing, only nodding after a momentary pause. "I hope that one day, I'll gain your trust. In the meantime, I'll work hard for it."
I smile tightly, before walking away, back to the Court.

**

I card my hand through my Jungkook's hair as he rests his head against my lap. I lean against the headboard, propping myself up with pillows as the both of us lie languidly on his bed.
"Monsters aren't real, you know," I muse, as Jungkook lazily twirls the edge of his pillow around his finger.
"I know," he says, "I just want you to be here with me."
"Is your bedroom not good enough?"
"It's almost perfect."
I pause, making him peer up at me in curiosity. "Almost?"
"It's only perfect when you're here."
I smile. My little one knew when to say the nicest things.
"I miss how things used to be," I hear him say, as he settles himself once again, curling around the pillow he now hugs against his chest.
"How?"
"I miss doing the small things. Like singing in a concert. Or going to 7-11. Or filming videos."
"Me too."
"I miss being small again. Remember when Yoochun used to bring us horseback riding?"
"You remember? You were only four." The memory comes flooding back to me at his words. Yoochun would bring us through fields and forests. We would ride for miles, have a picnic near the beach, and then ride all the way back. It feels like many year ago, when it was only five.
"I do. I remember Hector being angry because we missed classes, but Yoochun defended us. And then the Victor yelled at us and you yelled back."
"And then I got punished with four straight hours of running."
"Yeah…" Jungkook trails off. "And now Hector's dead. And the Victor probably won't talk to us anymore."
The both of us fall into silence. There is a heaviness in my heart at the words my little one has said. The days where we could wake up and sleep with the promise of safety and survival were long gone. I couldn't even guarantee Jungkook an education now since we were running around so much.
I feel the heaviness in my throat travel up to my eyes, and then feel that same heaviness trickle down my cheeks.
"Mama?"
I glance down to Jungkook craning his head up to look at me.
"Why are you crying?"
I lift my hands up to start wiping the tears away, forcing a smile.
"It's nothing," I say, sniffling loudly. "I guess I just miss those moments. I miss living without worries. I miss so many things. I even miss Hector and the Victor. I thought I hated them… but I miss them."
"Me too," Jungkook says simply, shifting as he wraps an arm around my legs. "I miss them. They were always yelling and angry but they were there."
"I'm sorry, baby," I say. I was surprisingly done crying as I rub my still runny nose. "I couldn't protect them. I can barely protect you. I wish I could give you a better life."
Jungkook says nothing, though his half-hug on my legs tightens.
"Hector would be alive if it weren't for me. The Victor wouldn't be angry either."
"Mama, don't blame yourself," Jungkook says. "You didn't choose this life. You're giving me the best life you can give. Thank you."
The heaviness in my throat returns.

*He doesn't mean it*
*You know he doesn't*

"You know what?" Jungkook continues, his voice suddenly determined. "I don't miss Hector and the Victor. They were always angry. They never celebrated my birthday and they always said we weren't good enough. They beat us all the time! I had to tiptoe around the castle whenever they were home. They never said they loved us. They never even kissed us good night! I changed my mind. I don't care that they were there. People who love you don't do all those things, right?" Jungkook cranes his neck up at me again, as if to confirm.
I slowly process his words. "You're right."
"Sure, I miss their presence. But I'm happier without them. I'm happier with you! And Jin, and Sikyung and Caine and Yoochun. People who really love me and care for me. I don't need Hector and the Victor and neither do you!"
Jungkook turns over to lie on his back, a loud frown on his face. "Sikyung told me about abuse a few days ago."
"He did?"
My little one nods, still staring adamantly up at the ceiling. "He said it was highly likely that we grew up in an abusive home, with the Victor and Hector. But I told him I didn't feel abused. I didn't think it was abuse."
Jungkook pauses and I wait for him to continue, all the while thinking of how wise my little one was, to be nine years old and to speak in conversations this deep with me.
"Then he told me that was how victims of abuse mostly think. They think that they somehow deserve the abuse. Because their mind is so… broken, that they somehow feel like abuse is normal."
I watch with a heavy heart as Jungkook's eyes water, as his nose turns red and his tears fall down the sides of his face.
"But you don't treat me like that and Jin doesn't treat me like that and Sikyung doesn't treat me like that and I realise that I'm lucky. At least I got out of the cycle. But it makes me so angry that there are other children like me who aren't so lucky. That they're still stuck in the cycle because they don't know it's abuse, and they think they deserve it."
He turns to me, his face turning a shade of red. "It makes me so angry, Mama. So angry, I could bite!"
I lean forward, wrapping my precious one in a hug as I pull him tight against my chest. My precious little one with all his heavy thoughts. How I wish I could protect him from the world.

*How could you - when you can't even protect him from your self?*

**

I stare up at the ceiling. I was exhausted and thought I could barely keep my eyes open. Now I've been lying in bed for an hour yet I can't fall asleep.
I'd shifted from Jungkook's room after he'd fallen asleep, thinking I'd cried enough for exhaustion to claim me once my head hit my pillow, yet I'm wide awake with my thoughts.
I sigh, rubbing my hands against my face. Voices in my head and now insomnia too? What a life to live.
"Can't sleep?"
I turn my head towards the sofa, seeing Jin seated and staring at me.
"Do you knock? Like - ever?"
Jin gives me a tight smile in reply, before getting up and coming to sit on the bed.
"Where have you been?" I ask. "I thought you had errands to run."
"I was speaking to Namjoon. It was important."
"So what are you doing in my room?"
"I sensed you were awake."
"And?"
"Someone has to be your bodyguard," he points out.
I roll my eyes but sit up.
"I couldn't sleep," I finally confess.
"You haven't been sleeping well for a while."
"I know. Caine said the healer would be coming soon. Maybe I can get a few hours once I'm fixed."
"Why do you say 'fixed' as if you're broken? You're not a robot."
"Am I not broken?" I say. "It feels like I am."
Jin studies me, maybe thinking of what to say and do.
Then he suddenly stands, extending his hand out to me.
"Come on."
I blink, staring up at him.
"I'll take you somewhere peaceful."

**

I stare up at the sky, watching the northern lights slowly wave in and out, their lights illuminating the dark night with colours of their own.
"I don't get it," I say, seeing my own breath come out of my mouth in smoke.
"What?"
"It was morning where we were from, and now it's night."
Jin takes a seat beside me on the bench, draping the blanket over my shoulders. "I shift you to Sweden to see the Aurora Borealis and the different time zones is what amazes you."
I turn to him, smiling as Jin stares up at the sky. His face is illuminated green and he has his chin resting on his propped up palm.
He looks handsome.
"You know, you're awfully nice…for the Future King of Hell."
Jin glances at me, an amused smile on his face. The way the light catches his eyes make them look hazel. "I told you I don't want to be the future king."
"And I never planned to be Aamon. Yet here I am."
"Lucifer will rule for all eternity."
"One day he will pass his title down," I remind him. "And as his oldest, you'll be expected to inherit the throne."
"I left that life behind long ago," Jin sighs. "He won't pass it to me. Even if he does, I don't want it."
I stare at Jin, deliberating what to say.
"What if the day comes when I fight Lucifer - to the death this time? What will you do?"
"The prophecy says the Aamon will fight him. It's not specific on which one."
"The prophecy also says the Aamon will fight the future king of Hell."
"Maybe it's not this Aamon," Jin says. "Or this future king."
I don't know what to say to that, so I shift my focus to the northern lights, appreciating their beauty as I stare at the snake-like lights running across the skies.
"Jungkook talked to me," I say, after a while.
"About?"
"Life in general," I answer, pulling my legs up to my chest. It's getting cold. "And I realised how grown he is."
"Only now?"
I turn to Jin. "My little one talked about abuse, and how he realised we were victims under Hector and the Victor's care."
Jin slowly turns to me, a concerned look on his face. "I'm sorry about that. I thought he would be capable of raising you. I didn't know anyone else I thought would be capable."
I shake my head. "It's not your fault. I've come to terms with it. The Victor and Hector gave me the necessary skills and connections to survive. But Jungkook… he is nine. He's only been alive for nine years and what does he know? Hardship, from one phase of life to another."
"You're doing your best."
"It's not good enough. What nine year old has to fight for his life, has to manage his own Court and has to act as representative to another? What nine year old has gone through what he has?"
Jin is quiet for a while, considering what to say. "Not very child is born that privileged. What will you do about it?"
"Nothing," I reply. "And that angers me even more. There's nothing I can do about it. Nothing I can change."
I turn to him. "Do you ever feel that? Hopeless over things that will never change?"
Jin smiles lightly, before turning to me. I realise it the moment he locks eyes with me.
Of course Jin has felt that before. Jin was still trying to change what had already been written, what was already fated for him. He was still trying to avoid his fate of being his father's successor, my destined enemy. Why'd I have to run my mouth like that?
"I'm sorry," I automatically say. "I should've -"
"No," Jin says. "Just drop it."
I fall quiet. I feel horrible. Why did I have to say that?
"How long do you think this will last?"
"What?" I prompt.
"This peace," Jin answers, staring up at the sky. "Not fighting. Not running for our lives."
"I don't know."
"Do you get tired of it?"
"Running? Yes. I'm exhausted. But this is our life now."
"Do you regret being Aamon?"
"I can't say. I'm tired of fighting. But it lead me to the life I have now. I met people I never thought I'd meet. I went to places I didn't know exist."
"You try to make light out of everything," Jin points out.
"If I didn't, I'd go crazy."
Jin leans forward, resting his elbows against his thighs.
"One day, this will end," he quietly says. "And it won't end nicely."
"I know." Jin was right. There is no point denying it, because it's true. One day, we would lose all of this. He as the son of Lucifer and I as the Aamon. This moment, these precious moments where we had nothing to run from, would end soon. "I've thought a lot about it."
He glances over his shoulder at me.
"One day, my luck will run out," I say. "I'll be killed in battle and a new Aamon will be elected. There are so many things I can't run away from."
Jin says nothing. There's no use denying it because it's true. No matter how many promises he makes, one day, my reign as Aamon will end one day with my assassination. No Aamon other than Adam has ever lived long enough to willingly pass on. This was the life I had to deal with.
I was accepting the fact.
"I don't want to worry about it anymore," I continue. "I'm just going to do my best to stay alive. And be a good Aamon."
"I don't want us to lose this," I hear him say.
"One day, we'll lose each other. You know that."
He straightens, turning to face me. "It won't be today."
Jin slowly leans forward again, resting his lips against mine and kisses me. I don't know what was possessing Jin to suddenly act like this but I can't say I'm complaining.
I kiss him back, turning my body to face him as I place a hand against his thigh. Jin's hand finds mine, and he twines our fingers together. I've kissed him many times, but it is that little act of his hand in mine that makes my heart beat out my chest.
I part the kiss, opening my eyes to stare at him.
"So what did you see in my mind this time?"
"I thought you said you didn't like it when I did that?"
"Has that ever stopped you before?"
Jin only smiles, my hand still in his. He reaches up to rest a hand against my chin as he kisses me softly once more.
"I've lived many millenia thinking I fit right in on this Earth, yet it is you that makes me feel like a fish out of water."
*Take a fish out of water and the fish will die.*
Pakal's words suddenly resonate in my head, and I catch my breath. Jin's hand falls away and he looks at me quizzically.
"What's wrong?" I hear him ask, as his other hand slips out from mine.
"Nothing."
I stand, walking forward as the anxiety of it all slowly gets to me.
"Taehyung?"
I turn to face Jin, seeing him seated, relaxed with an arm slung over the back of the bench.
"What if it kills you?"
"What if 'what' kills me?"
"This," I exasperate. "All this. Me and you."
"What are you talking about?"
I deflate, seeing his mildly annoyed expression staring back at me. Did I have to spell it out to him? "…together."
The expression worsens. "I've told you a hundred times, Taehyung. I am a demon. I don't have -"
"Then what was that?" I bite back. "Lust?"
Jin stares. I feel his anger growing. "Power."
"You call all that attraction to power? Power you hope will one day kill you?"
Jin is quiet, and I take his silence as agreement.
"After everything you've gone through, you really think dying will save you."
"What else can I do?"
"Not die, for a start!"
"I've told you once and I've told you a thousand times. You wouldn't understand!"
"Fcuk off!" I practically scream, as a wild burst of power leaves me, flying straight at Jin. I see his reflexes work, him throwing up a shield as he stands and braces himself before he takes the blow head on.
He backs up a step as it slams into him, passes by him and then destroys the bench behind him.
Jin stands there, just staring at me, completely unfazed.
I stare back, unsure what to say or do, but definitely fuming with rage. He comes forward, standing practically an inch away from me. He exudes the same anger I'm feeling.
"Childish," he growls, his eyes turning red as he looms over me. I feel an arm wrap around my waist as he roughly pulls me forward, closing the distance between us. I stare. His human form is wavering - the true guise of the demon underneath starting to show.
Perhaps Jin was truly, truly angry.
I raise a hand.
I could call on to my power, hit him with a strong enough blow to clear this field. I could engage him in a battle, fighting with him until either one of us knocks the other out. I could call on to my Seraphim right now and watch them duel it out.
I rest the hand against Jin's cheek.
I watch as the rage morphs into confusion, and then realization. I watch as his eyes turn back to normal and his human form solidifies. I feel the deadlock around my waist loosen, until it falls away completely.
Jin stares at me, a different expression on his face as he raises his hand and rests it against mine.
I reach up to kiss him, letting my lips rest softly against his. Jin kisses me back, but is the one who parts it this time.
"I won't lose you," I say, as I look up at him. "And I won't let fate claim you."
For a few moments, Jin says nothing. He stares at me, unmoving and unflinching. He finally moves, looking away as he pulls my hand away. "Let's get back."

**

*Coward*
*You only fear his death because you refuse to lose him*
*A selfish, selfish Aamon*

"MAMA!"
I jolt awake, sitting up in bed as I call on to my power before I even realise what's going on.
Jungkook barges right in, opening the door with such force that it slams into the wall behind it. My little one runs in barefoot, in tears and panic.
"Baby, what?" I exclaim, immediately switching off my powers as my little one leaps onto my bed and straight into my arms. "What happened? What's going on?" I instinctively wrap my arms around him as he hides his face in my chest.
"My Court," Jungkook sobs. "My Court."
"What? What is it?"
"Someone attacked my Court," he finally says. "Someone just dropped a firebomb on the entire Court!"

**

"What do you think?"
"Taehyung, these are fires of Hell," Caine says, rubbing the soot from the fire between his fingers, revealing what I already knew.
We stare at the charred remains of the Asian Lycan Court, practically razed to the ground, save for its foundation.
"Your Highness."
I glance over my shoulder, seeing Sikyung coming towards me.
"Sikyung," I greet, making my way over to him. "Are you okay? What about the rest of your Court members?"
"They're all fine. The protective spells surrounding the Court gave us all time to escape before the fire engulfed us all."
"Thank God," I breathe. "Do you have a place to stay yet?"
"Not yet, Your Highness. We're trying to reach out to some of our allies, but it's difficult to house seventy seven individuals at once."
"Get a new residence immediately. Tab it to my Court. Update me of your new address once the purchase has been made."
Sikyung nods his understanding. "Thank you, Your Highness. We are greatly indebted."
He leaves almost immediately, shifting into wolf form before running off, several other Lycans at his tail.
I sigh, running a hand through my hair.
"Have you gotten in contact with Jin yet?"
Caine shakes his head. "Azazel is untraceable. He doesn't want to be found."

*He's left you, he's left you*
*He never cared for you*
*He lied all along*

I scrunch my eyes shut, trying to focus. I had bigger matters to be concerned about.
"Was it me?" I think aloud. "Did I do this, Caine?"
"I don't think so. This is a targeted attack."
"Maybe I did this in my sleep? Was I sleepwalking?"
"As a defence mechanism, maybe. But it would've been impossible for you to attack the Court without being aware of the same."
"Why would anyone from Hell want to attack the Lycan Court?" I breathe.
"I don't think the Lycan Court was the real target. Flames of Hell are powerful enough to melt through any earthly matter. Not one Lycan perished."
I turn to Caine as he stares at the rubble.
"Why would anyone from Hell want to attack the Lycan Court? They don't have anything to do with the Underworld."
Caine turns to me, staring deep into my soul.
"It's almost like a ruse."
It hits me the moment he said it. "I'm the target."
"Someone is trying to get your attention."
I feel my panic rising. "Someone is trying to distract me."

**

I practically sprint out of the portal, Caine following closely from behind me.
True enough, just as I'd suspected. My Court is going up in flames higher than the court itself, the structure, strippping it bare while clouds of smoke cast shadows in the evening sky.
I'd left it unprotected. The Court was too new. Jin barely had time to set the protection spells and I never even hired any guards.
My baby.
I start looking around, finding for that brunette grade schooler with the body and attitude of a teenager. Where was my baby?
"JUNGKOOK!" I scream. "JUNGKOOK, WHERE ARE YOU? NAMJOON!"
"Taehyung, we have to destroy the fire," Caine warns.
"If we destroy the fire, we destroy the entire Court and destroy anyone's chances of getting out of there alive!"
"Mama!" I whirl around, hearing the voice of my precious one. "Mama!"
"Do you hear that?" I breathe, before both Caine and I turn to the burning building.
"Mama!"
"He's inside," I hear Caine say.
I recklessly break into a run, heading straight for the fire before Caine manages to catch my arm, pulling me back.
"Let go of me!" I screech, whirling around to face him. "I'm not going to let Jungkook -"
"For God's sake, you are the most powerful earthbound individual alive!"
"I don't care -"
"I'm saying - LOOK!"
Caine points to the doorway and sure enough, I can see two figures running towards us.
The entire burning structure suddenly seems to groan and roar - signalling that it was on the brink of collapse.
"HURRY!" I scream. I couldn't afford to throw my power around. The entire Court was already so fragile. If it collapsed on the both of them, that would be the end for sure.
Namjoon manages to run out first, Jungkook just a few feet behind him. Just as my little one almost reaches the exit, the Court roars for one last time before the roof collapses into itself, swallowing Jungkook along with it.
I'm screaming now as I break into a run, Caine by my side this time as we head towards the still burning, destroyed Court. Namjoon runs right back into the flames, disappearing almost immediately.
I panic. Losing one would be bad enough.
I call on to the weather, calling for rain, hail and screaming winds. It comes immediately, soaking Caine and I as Caine casts a spell, slowly and painstakingly reversing the damage on the structure to prevent further danger.
After what felt like an eternity, Namjoon runs out, Jungkook slung over his shoulder. Both are coughing badly as I immediately cancel out the weather and run to them.
Namjoon carefully lowers Jungkook down to the grass. Jungkook collapses, coughing hard enough to gag several times.
I am quickly by his side, rubbing soot off his face and patting him down as I check for injuries.
"Baby, are you okay?" I gasp.
Jungkook nods as I immediately wrap him in a hug, thankful for his breathing.
I turn to Namjoon. "Why the Hell did you do that?" I yell. "You could've died, running back into the fire!"
Namjoon blinks, apparently taken aback. "I - I couldn't just leave him."
I unwrap one arm off Jungkook, using it to pull Namjoon towards me and wrap him in a hug too.
"Thank you," I whisper. "Thank you."

**

"My Court and Jungkook's Court. Hell's flames. No casualties." I'm mumbling to myself, thinking out loud as Caine sits on the opposite couch, arms crossed over his chest as he studies me from time to time.
The four of us are housed in my old Court, Jungkook and Namjoon resting in the guest room while Caine and I sit in the library.
"Taehyung," Caine starts. "Enough. You're beating around the bush."
"I'm just making sure," I answer distractedly. "I don't want to be wrong."
"You know who the culprit is."
"No, I don't."
"It's Azazel."
"It's not," I snap, looking up at him.
"Who else has power over Hell? Who else can call on to those flames?"
"Lucifer," I bite back. "His children. The other Aamons. My future initiates. My Parliament. Myself!"
"You're grasping at straws."
"Jin doesn't have the motive."
"Lucifer and his other children are in Hell," Caine patiently starts. "The Aamons are in Heaven. Their power cannot reach the Earth unless they are physically here. You, as member of your own Parliament would be informed of the birth of any initiates. And you are in the abode of the Parliament. Wouldn't they try to kill you right now since you're right under their noses?"
"Jin wouldn't do this!" I stand, starting to be really annoyed at Caine's lack of loyalty. "What would he gain?"
"He has no alibi. He is the only person capable of doing this."
"You don't know him!" I yell.
"I've known him from the moment he was created!" Caine roars, making me flinch and take a step back. "You think I don't know your Jin? I have seen him at his worst, Taehyung, and the only thing I can tell you is that he is what he is. A demon!"
"If every Heavenly outcast is a demon, then so are you!"
There is tense silence between us. That had been the final nail on Caine's coffin, and I knew it.
"Taehyung. You may love Azazel and see only the best of him, but listen to yourself. Your judgement is clouded. You're moving only on emotion. You are so blinded by the love you have for him that you aren't seeing facts. He betrayed you. He left you. Yet you still defend him."
Every sentence is like a bullet to my chest, each leaving me winded and in pain. "He doesn't have a reason to do this," I say, aware that my voice is cracking and whisper soft. I'm making up excuses. The answer is obvious. I just refuse to believe it.
"Don't blind yourself when your eyes are wide open."
*The prophecy also says the Aamon will fight the future king of Hell.*
I feel the world crash and burn around me.
*I don't want to lose you.*
"Taehyung -"
"Please leave."
*It won't be today.*
I feel the tears trickle down my face as I stare blankly in shock.
"Please just leave."
"I'll be in the area."
I hear Caine's footsteps echo loudly as he leaves.
I close my eyes, attempting to control my emotions again.

*You don't know him!*
*Demon!*
*He betrayed you!*

"Taehyung?"
I jump at the familiar voice, turning around to see Jungkook standing at the door, a hand against the handle.
"Hey," I greet, attempting a smile. How long has he been standing there? Did he hear everything? "Do you need anything?"
"You have a conference call with Yoochun and Yunho."
Oh shhit. That was today?
"They're already on the phone."
"I'm not in the mood to talk. Can you tell them I'll reschedule?"
For a moment, Jungkook stares quietly at me.
"Is it true? Did Jin try to kill us?"

*You are so blinded by the love you have for him that you aren't seeing facts!*
*He left you*
*You're moving only on emotion.*

"Mama?"
"I don't know, baby." I sit down at the couch, running a hand through my hair.
Jungkook comes to me, kneeling by my side as he reaches for my cheeks, wiping the tears away with his sweater sleeve.
"I believe in him."
I focus on Jungkook, slightly taken aback by his words.
"What?"
"I believe in Jin," Jungkook repeats. "He's always doing weird stuff but it's always to protect us. Do you believe in him?"

*I'm sorry. I love you. Taehyung, please.*

"Yeah," I find myself saying. "I do."
"Good," my little one smiles. "Weren't you the one who told me you had an Earthly duty as Aamon?"
"…yes?"
"Pick up the phone. Yoochun had to be bounced around thrice before he got connected to the temporary line Caine set up in the guest room. He sounds irritated."
"Caine set up a land line?" I say. I knew Caine was indescribably powerful, but I never really knew he would be good at technology too.
Jungkook makes a little face at me. "Yes, and the longer we make the Vampire King and the Sovereign wait, the ruder we are. Let's go!"
My little one pulls me up to stand as he drags me along.
Sometimes I think I am the 'parent' between us. I'd raised him and had always seen him as a baby. But I guess this was changing as my little one started growing up and maturing. I'd find myself depending on him more and more. Jungkook was my anchor and my rock. I turned to him when I found myself in despair, and it was always his presence that would pull me back down to the ground, that made me feel like things would be alright.
How the tables have turned.
We enter the guest room, bare save for two single beds, a bookshelf and a study table leaned against the wall. On the table is one lone telephone - those older office types where the the wire is still physically connected to the receiver.
I pick up the phone just as Jungkook presses a red button, and I'm immediately put through.
"Hello?"
"Taehyung," Yoochun's voice on the other side sounds relieved. "How have you been?"
"We heard what happened." I hear another voice on the line, the Vampire King's.
"How?" I ask.
"Word got out," Yoochun explains vaguely. "Is everyone safe?"
"We're all unharmed. Everyone in Jungkook's Court managed to escape before the fire got too big."
"And Jungkook?"
"Fit as a fiddle." I look up, glancing at Jungkook as I throw him a smile.
"Hi, Yoochun!" my little one calls, getting the signal.
"Hi, baby."
"Where are you housed for now?" Yunho asks.
"My old Court. It's a temporary arrangement until I settle some matters."
"Are you safe with them?"
"It's not like I have any other place to go."
"Taehyung, my humble abode is always open to you," Yoochun says.
"As is mine," Yunho agrees.
"Thanks, but no. I can't put any other Courts in further danger. Besides, vampires with fire… You're better off as you are."
"I see your point," Yunho agrees. "Have you investigated the cause of the fire?"
I pause. I have. Or I assume I have.
"My people are on it," I say, instead. "Don't worry."
"Good," Yunho says. "Have you considered my offer?"
"About your experts?" I muse.
"Yes," he confirms. "Therapy."
"I don't know," I sigh. "It would be risky."
"A therapist?"
"Accepting your help."
"Taehyung, therapy will help deal with the mental and emotional toll of your job."
"It might. Or it might expose sensitive matters to an outsider."
At that, both Yoochun and Yunho are quiet. Jungkook tilts his head slightly, staring at me in quiet consideration.
"I appreciate your help, Your Highness," I say, "but for now, it's a risk I'm not willing to take."
"Can you deal with your demons on your own?" I hear Yoochun ask.
"I have only one demon here," I answer. "And he's enough to deal with."
Maybe Yoochun gets what I'm aiming at, because I hear him chuckle at the other end.
"We're here if you need us, Taehyung," Yunho bids.
"Thank you."
"Send Jungkook my love," Yoochun adds.
"I can hear you," Jungkook chimes in. "I love you too!"
I hang up soon after, placing the receiver back on the phone.
Jungkook grins at me, excited for maybe no reason whatsoever.
"That was a good phone call, right?"
I don't answer, heading to one of the beds in the corner, and sit down on it, before throwing my body back and lying atop the mattress. I guess considering the fact that the Parliament don't receive guests, the bed was pretty comfy and clean.
"Mama?"
Jungkook tails me, sitting down on the bed as he stares.
"Are you okay?"
"I'm not," I confess. "I'm having a lot of thoughts in my head."
"About Yoochun and Yunho?"
"About Jin."
Jungkook falls quiet for perhaps two seconds before he lies atop me, resting his head on my chest and wrapping his arms around my waist.
He doesn't move or say anything and I let him be for a few moments before my curiousity gets the better of me.
"What are you doing?"
"Giving you a hug, silly."
I feel myself smile, the heavy feeling on my chest disappearing. Or maybe that was just the weight of Jungkook's head replacing it. I wrap both arms around him, kissing the top of his head.
"I want to say 'don't worry'," I hear Jungkook say. "But I know it's just in your nature to worry for others. You think Jin would really do that?"
"I don't know, baby." I hated that I was hesitating - that I was doubtful and unsure. That I didn't really know what the answer was. That maybe I was too afraid to find out.
"We don't know what Jin is thinking," he continues. "So we don't really know why. But what we do know is that Jin loves us." He looks up at me, resting his chin on my chest. I finally notice that Jungkook's eyes are turning red - not a deep blood red, but rather a soft amber that was morphing into that familiar colour soon. Jungkook was getting thirsty.
"I'm a vampire, Mama. Allergic to fire and sunshine. Jin set our Courts on fire. I somehow made it out alive, even when I had to run through flames. I think Jin knows what he's doing."
Jungkook was right.
There were too many loopholes. Jungkook - and everyone who was in the Courts at the time - was alive. No way this was a coincidence. If Jin wanted them dead, they would be.
I just have to wonder what he's thinking.

**

"Namjoon."
He looks up from his book, glancing over his shoulder to see me looking from the doorway.
"Taehyung." He closes the book, smiling lightly.
"Could I steal a few moments of your time?" I ask.
"Of course. Why would you need to ask?"
I come forward, shutting the door behind me as I join Namjoon at the balcony. He is seated on the railing, leaning lightly against one of the supporting pillars. I stand by his side, resting my hands on the railing as I stare at the vast expanse of land before me.
We are quiet for a while, me needing a moment to rearrange my thoughts, and Namjoon just naturally comfortable with silence.
"Are you alright?"
Namjoon smiles again. His dimples pop out. "I'm fine, Taehyung. The fire didn't even touch me."
"Thank you for saving Jungkook's life. You didn't have to."
"It's nothing."
"It's not," I say. "Jungkook is my world. He's all I have left in the chaos of being Aamon. I would have nothing to lose if I'd lost him."
"You have Jin," he says.
"Jin is -"

*A traitor!*
*A murderer!*
*A liar!*

"- not here," I continue. "I strongly suspect he started the fire."
"So I heard."
I turn to Namjoon, just as a strong gust of wind passes us, blowing hair into my face. I reach up to tuck my hair behind my ear, just as Namjoon takes something out his pocket.
He holds it up, showing it to me.
"Jin gave me this before he left."
I stare at the ring before I look up at Namjoon. "When?"
"I think it was a few hours before the fire."
I take the ring and hold it in my palm. It is most definitely enchanted.
"Did he say anything when he passed you this?"
"He told me to bring Jungkook to the library and stay there."
I turn to Namjoon. "What?"
"He told me it was a matter of life and death."
"What happened then?" I swallow the traces of panic that is starting to rise up my throat. This only meant that Jin had planned this beforehand.
"Nothing. I brought Jungkook to the library not long after you left. By the time we realised the Court was on fire… it was too late."
"Why didn't you tell me this sooner?"
"Because I was trying to make sense of it too."
Jungkook could've escaped. If the fire had started at one end of the Court, they could've just run out. They could've made it out unharmed. But they'd stayed in the library. The *underground* library, which would've easily trapped and killed them.
"How did you escape?"
"We just ran."
"You ran through the flames?"
Namjoon nods.
"Both of you?"
"Yes."
Nothing. Not a singe on either Jungkook or Namjoon. Not a burn mark on their clothes. Not a strand of hair on their head out of place.
Jungkook as a vampire should have gone up in flames the moment he touched fire.
A protection spell.
"Did Jin say anything else? Did he do anything that struck your attention?"
"No. He left after that."
"Did he say where he was going?"
Namjoon shakes his head.
I sigh, running my hands through my hair.
"Thank you for telling me, Namjoon."
"I'm sorry I haven't been much help."
"No, you've been a great help. Can I keep this?" I ask, holding the ring up.
"Sure."
I go back inside, shutting the patio door firmly behind me as I rush for my study.
"Caine," I say aloud. "I need you."
A portal opens before me a few seconds later, and Caine walks out, immediately falling instep with me. "What is it?"
"Jin spoke to Namjoon before he disappeared."
"And?"
"He told Namjoon to keep Jungkook in the library before he left."
"The library?" Caine repeats. "Your library that was a basement?"
"Yes."
We reach my study and enter, just as I shut the door behind us.
"He gave Namjoon this before he left." I throw the ring in Caine's direction as he fluidly catches it.
He is quiet, studying the ring as he turns it this way and that.
"By the time they realised what was going on, it was too late. The smoke and fire was everywhere. But they managed to escape. Namjoon said they simply ran through the flames."
"Both of them?"
I nod.
He finally looks up from the ring. "This thing is enchanted with enough protection spells to save the wearer from a nuclear blast. Jin wanted them to survive."
"Jin is leaving behind an obvious trail. He's hiding something."
"Someone is after you," Caine says. "And he's trying to stop them."
I walk towards him. "I know Jin has a reason for doing all this. I just haven't figured out why. I know you think I'm blinded, but Jin wouldn't just turn his back on us. If you don't trust me, at least trust Jin."
Caine seems like he's considering my words, processing what I'm saying and weighing the odds. "What do you plan to do?"
"I'm going to find Jin. And I'm going to figure out what the fcuk is going on."
"How?"
"I need to figure out who has a grudge against me."
"What's the biggest, most recent entity you may have insulted?"
"Uhhh, PETRA?"
Caine stares at me, a slow-forming look of incredulousness appearing on his face. "PETRA? The worldwide peace-keeping organization?"
"Yeah."
"What did you do?"
"I refused to return Namjoon, who had betrayed them."
Caine groans, falling against the couch. "You dissolved all your alliances, get in trouble with your Parliament, turn Heaven upside down and now you've insulted PETRA?"
"Yes. I wasn't going to give Namjoon back to them. They were gonna kill him."
"And now they might want to kill you."
"I'm the Aamon," I say, rolling my eyes as I take a seat beside him. "What can a bunch of humans do to me?"
"Don't underestimate PETRA, Taehyung. Every Court answers to PETRA. If they call for battle against you, you're gonna have the whole world to fight."
I stand. I guess I had a low tolerance for Caine, because he was getting on my nerves again. "I don't care what you say, and I don't care what they do. I'm not gonna be scared into changing my morals just because some Court felt insulted about me protecting Namjoon."
"This is politics," Caine says, standing as well. "Honour and respect are the backbone of every Court. You may be powerful, Taehyung, but even mountains fall."
"Fcuk this!" I yell. "If every decision I make is based on fear of another, what's the point of me being Aamon?!" I storm out of my study, making a point to slam the door behind me.

*No one supports you*
*No one has any belief in you*
*A worthless Aamon.*

Air. I need air. Fresh air, preferably.
I make my way out the front door, where a distance away, the stone tower where Sobekneferu had been crucified and killed for disobeying her Parliament millenia ago, still stands tall.
I hated this. I hated this obsession for respect and this lack of morals and all this insanity that was politics.
I understood the concept. I know the importance. But still, why?
A cool night's breeze passes through me, the winds somehow cooling my anger as well. I had to calm down. I wouldn't be able to think in this state.
PETRA was a likely suspect. They were the only entity I know who might be powerful enough to want to fight the Aamon. I might have insulted the Archangels, but I had God's favour on my side, which meant that they'd be too afraid to hurt me. There were the Nine Courts I'd recently broken alliances with, but Jin would never recognize them as a big enough threat to act like this. I don't think Hell and all of its inhabitants would currently be vengeful enough to do this when I'd just helped Lucifer regain control over his Kingdom and save Merriham.
PETRA was the only organization I could narrow it down to.
"Fifth Aamon."
I glance over my shoulder to see James, her hair as always slicked back in a ponytail tight enough to give her a facelift.
"A package came for you."
"Put it in my study."
"From PETRA."

**

"It's just a box," Jungkook says, as the four of us stare at the package placed on the table in the study.
"But it's a box from PETRA," Namjoon says, sounding eerily ominous.
"It doesn't contain any spells," Caine says.
"And it's too light to contain any bombs," Jungkook adds in.
"You touched it?" Caine questions.
"How else was I going to take the package?"
"I'm just going to get this over and done with," I say, reaching for the package. It's a tiny box, small enough to fit in the palm of my hand. All three around me visibly flinch as I pick the box up and stare at it. "No note?"
"Nothing," Jungkook confirms.
I place a hand on the lid, bracing myself for the worst. The worst it could be was a bomb, which I'm pretty sure either me or Caine could be fast enough to contain.
In theory.
I open it and peer into the box, feeling Jungkook look over my shoulder.
Only two items are in the box - a small lock of black hair tied together with a hair tie and leather bracelet.
I stare at both items.
I had the exact same leather bracelet on my own wrist, given to me by Jungkook before I left for Hell with Jin for the first time as I went to fight Beelzebub.
Jin had the exact same one.
Jungkook reaches for the lock of hair, taking it between his thumb and index before he sniffs it lightly. "It's Jin's," he says, confirming my exact thoughts as he places the lock of hair back in the box.
"Taehyung," Caine calls, a quiet warning in his voice.
His voice sounds far away, almost far enough to be nonexistent to me.
The pieces are slowly being put together.
Me refusing to hand over Namjoon. Director Anthony's warning. Jin burning down Jungkook's and my Court, leaving behind no casualties. Jin's hair and bracelet in a package from PETRA.
That stupid fcuk had been trying to stop an attack by PETRA all on his own. And now they've got him.
I place the lid back on the box, turning around to see that Jungkook, Namjoon and Caine had taken several steps back to the other end of the room, cautious looks on their faces.
"What?" I say.
"You're not angry?" Jungkook peeps.
"I'm saving it," I answer, feeling the box in my hands burst into flames in response to my repressed rage.
"Right," Caine says, staring very pointedly at the package on fire. "It's time to convene a meeting."
"No," I refute. "I know every argument that's about to come." I clench my fist, destroying the package and the flames at the same time. "I'm calling this on my own."

**

I said I knew every argument that was about to come and I did. This was a clearcut test on my own skills as a political leader.
The easiest way out would be to offer an apology and hope that nothing else would come out of this. That however, would be a problem on its own. There would be no guarantee that PETRA would even accept my apology and even if they did, they'd probably demand compensation.
Money would be fine, but it's pretty clear what they'd demand.
Namjoon.
And if I gave him to them, he'd be as good as dead.
But if I didn't, what would happen to Jin? Would they kill him?
The Bermuda Triangle didn't affect me, but it turned him as weak as a human. If he died in there, would he stay dead?
I sigh aloud, tapping my tabletop with my fingernails to distract myself.
Even an apology would be risky for me. It would only show that my Court was weak, open to be taken advantage of. If I allowed an organization to step on me this once, I would be allowing it forever. The Aamon's Court would be weak in the eyes of the public.
I already know that this idea would be shot down by the Parliament and the Aamons. The Aamon's Court must always uphold high social standing and to allow it to fall to ruin, just for one person who didn't even belong to my Court, was out of the question.
I was risking it all for a person who technically didn't even belong to me, who I frankly didn't even trust.
But I can't give up on Namjoon. I can't, and I won't. He would die if PETRA got a hold of him.
But I can't save Jin without throwing Namjoon into the fire. Namjoon may have saved Jungkook and Jin's life, but Jin has saved mine and Jungkook's countless times over. My Court would be nowhere without his guidance. I needed him. There was no denying that.
But of course as Aamon, as the most powerful entity to walk the Earth, I had the full capacity to destroy PETRA from the ground up. I could blackmail them with the secrets Namjoon knew. I could threaten them with the power I held in my hand. And if they weren't afraid of my warnings, I could destroy them - maybe cost a few thousand dollars in damage, disable some of their worldwide surveillances.
And yet again, another issue would be the fact that PETRA was powerful. Courts bowed down to them. If PETRA sought their help, I'd be dead. I'd just cut off all my own alliances. I couldn't reach out for help even if I wanted to.
It would make the fight all or nothing. Either I destroy the entire organization, or I'd risk my own Court. And that would include killing hundreds - maybe even thousands - of innocents. All to protect Namjoon.
I knew what I had to do. The answer was obvious.

**

"Have you decided?" Caine asks, arms crossed as he sits opposite my table.
"Yeah," I say, sighing as I sink deeper into my chair. "I have."
"Are you going to tell me what your plan is?"
"If I tell you, I'd have to involve you too. Then you'd get in trouble with Heaven for not stopping me."
Caine shrugs. "Fair enough. I trust that you make the right decision." He leans forward then, resting his elbow on my table. "But hear me out on this, Fifth Aamon. Power is addictive. It will make you go crazy. Succumb to the urges and you will lose yourself."
"I just want to save Jin."
"Be wary the costs." Caine gets up to leave. I am quiet as I stare at his receding form. He was right. I was the Aamon. I had to calculate the risks. I had to think in numbers. Caine places a hand on the doorknob, peering over his shoulder to look at me. "So are we saving Azazel or not?"

**

I walk out of the portal, Namjoon following close behind me.
We peer back to see Jungkook waving enthusiastically, Caine by his side.
"Good luck!" I see my little one mouth. I grin and blow him a kiss, just as the portal shuts off.
My eyes wander at our surroundings, seeing the multiple vehicles parked around us. This was the warehouse Jungkook was talking about, I suppose.
"You ready?" I say to Namjoon. He nods in answer but says nothing more. I guess he's nervous. I stomp my foot down on the ground, releasing a burst of power that travels in a full circle. It hits the vehicles, throwing them all back and clearing the area for us.
The alarms are set off immediately, flashing red lights signalling an emergency. I begin walking towards the lifts, pressing the down button.
"What floor again?" I ask, as Namjoon stands beside me.
"The one labelled M."
"M?"
"Main floor."
"Oh."
The lift reaches us with a quiet 'ding', a sharp contrast to the chaos of the alarms.
"How sure are you that this plan of yours will work?" Namjoon asks as we shuttle into the lift. He presses the intended floor for me.
"Absolutely zero confidence," I confess. "I'm just going on blind luck."
"You realize we could die if your plan fails."
"Very much aware."
Namjoon is quiet as the lift travels downwards. I stare at the lift buttons. None are numbered, only labelled with what seemed to me like random letters. Strange.
"Listen, Taehyung. If you could just -"
"No." I shift my focus to Namjoon. "I'm not going to hand you over, Namjoon."
"It will save you time. And Jin's life."
"But it won't save you yours."
"Taehyung, please."
"Namjoon," I interrupt him, tired of this ongoing argument. "I came here to do two things. Save Jin and get the both of you out of here. I need to focus."
The lift comes to a steady stop, opening its doors with another quiet 'ding'.
Namjoon and I are met with a small army armed to the teeth, all weaponry pointed at us. I walk out of the lift, Namjoon staying close behind me.
"I came here to see Director Anthony," I say, pausing amidst the sea of soldiers whose guns follow my every move. "And I don't see him."
"Director Anthony has been reassigned." A female voice responds to me, though I don't actually see her. The soldiers suddenly part, making way to allow a woman in a bright red blazer and skirt to pass through. She walks like she doesn't see all the weaponry around her, pausing a few feet away from me. I notice that her lipstick matches her outfit. "Welcome, Fifth Aamon."
"Charmed."
She smiles, in one of those odd ways that doesn't really reach her eyes, as if the skin was too tight. She was a cold blooded serial killer for sure.
"I got your message. Where is Jin?"
"You'll see him shortly."
The sound of a scuffle starts from behind me and I turn around to see Namjoon with a bag placed over his head by some soldiers, pulled taught around his neck as if intending to cut off his oxygen supply. I instinctively rush forward, before a metal bat is crudely used to smack him against his head. Namjoon immediately stills, falling to the ground unconscious.
I stare at his unmoving form, before turning to Tanya.
"You're really fcuking brave," I say. "I've told you that Namjoon falls under my protection now."
"Don't worry about him. He will be dealt with accordingly."
Fcuk. This wasn't part of the plan.
I bite my tongue, not wanting to spite her more.
"Follow me, Your Highness."
Tanya starts walking, the sea of soldiers parting again to let her through. I glance back at Namjoon, just to see two soldiers pick him up and pull him away.
Man, I really hope he was going to be okay.

**

I follow behind Tanya as we enter into a deemly lit room.
Something at the back of my head is screaming that this is a trap, but I didn't really have much of a choice, did I? I could attack everyone in this organization, but I had no idea where Jin - or Namjoon were. The lapse in time could kill them, and that would defeat the whole point of me coming here.
The lights are suddenly , and I squint at the sudden invasion.
"Do sit down, Your Highness."
I stare.
We are in some sort of suspended glass room, soldiers lining the walls, separated by only a few feet of space between them. Behind the glass walls are another set of soldiers. There had to be at least forty of them in all, all with their weapons pointed at me.
In the midst of it all, Tanya is seated before a table, an empty chair across from her. I guess that was my seat.
"I didn't know you would prepare so much for my arrival. It's almost like you expected me," I say, taking a seat.
"We had plans to visit your ward's Court," she says, throwing her hair over her shoulder? "But that got burnt down. And when we tried to visit your Court, it strangely burned down too. We had no choice but to extend you an invitation of our own."
"How kind."
So I was right.
Jin had attempted to stop them from coming. I don't know what their definition of 'visit' was, but if it was anything like how they'd previously 'visited' my hotel room and Jungkook's Court, then burning down our Courts was a necessary safety precaution.
Something is wrapping itself around my ankles and I glance down to see metal restraints anchoring me to the chair. I look back up at her. Tanya's expression doesn't even change.
"You don't trust me?" I ask, innocently tilting my head.
"I'm sure the feeling is mutual."
I smile, finally noticing what is on the table.
"My case file," I say, sliding it towards me.
"Yes, we are finished with our investigation."
"And?"
"We have concluded that there was no breach of law in your matters concerning Layla."
"So why am I welded to your chair?"
"Because you have something we want."
"You could've just asked nicely."
"Anthony did. You rejected him. So this is us asking again."
The wall behind her suddenly becomes transparent, revealing an inner room that had been hidden.
Namjoon is seated inside, tied to a chair with a really painful-looking raw, red bruise that extended from his left temple to the apple of his cheek. Dried blood clings to the corner of his mouth. He must have landed face first when they'd knocked him unconscious. At least, that's what I was telling myself.
About four feet to his left is Jin. Just like Namjoon, he is tied to his chair. Unlike Namjoon who only sported two bruises, Jin looks beaten to a bloody pulp. His sleeves have been ripped off, showing off his arms lined with burn marks. They looked like they'd been branded with a hot iron. His neck has a long reddish bruise that was very apparently a strangulation attempt. Jin's face is still intact, though his lips are red and raw. His head had probably been split open a few times, because blood had been seeping through from his temple before it dried. There is a punch mark on his cheek, a reddish purple that was starting to either calm down or about to swell dramatically.
I've honestly never seen him so bruised and beaten.
And with the two are two soldiers positioned strategically behind them in such a way that both Jin and Namjoon were in their direct line of fire.
I shift my focus to the director, who smiles demurely.
"You wouldn't know our surprise," she starts, "when your boyfriend suddenly came over for a visit. We had to have *so* many last minute preparations to host him."
"Cut the bull," I interject. "Name your demand."
"Give Namjoon back to us. And we will return your friend in one piece."
My anger was slowly building, and I bite the urge to leap across the table to strangle this biitch.
"Why are you doing this?"
"We have a reputation to uphold," Tanya says. "We maintain the peace between all entities of this Earth. With that, we cannot let the respect the Courts have over us waver."
"Jin has nothing to do with any of this."
"As your Official Advisor, he has *everything* to do with this."
"You're capturing and torturing innocents!"
"Innocent?" Tanya twitches. "Your actions have changed society as is. You have shifted the power balance of the Courts and endangered the supernatural community with near misses from the human public eye."
"I had Angels, Demons, my own Parliament and souls from the Afterlife come after me. I defeated multiple Courts who took advantage of my power, the Demon King Lucifer himself and Archangels in Heaven and you're blaming me for near misses?"
"And we are the entity that ensures the inhabitants of Earth coexist peacefully. Humans get nearer to discovering the supernatural community every day. The last time a human found a supernatural species, we called him 'Hitler'. We will not hesitate to eradicate threats to what little peace there is on this Earth."
"And somehow giving Namjoon back to you will settle all the current threats that exist on earth, right?" I bite. "What will you do if I hand him over to you?"
"We will make an example of traitors of PETRA."
"And how does that make you any different from the monsters you seek to protect the Earth from?"
"We do it out of necessity." Tanya doesn't even budge. "We have killed Heads of Court to prevent future wars and we will not hesitate to kill traitors of their own kind."
"Namjoon is not a traitor."
"We must maintain the peace of the land."
"If you want peace, you'll let him go!" I roar, feeling myself light up again.
*Power is addictive. It will make you go crazy. Succumb to the urges and you will lose yourself.*
I close my eyes, containing my anger. Caine was right. If I let my power do the talking, then I was going to lose to my power. I would just be thinking through my anger.
I breathe, inhaling and exhaling loudly as I calm myself down.
I open my eyes to see Tanya staring right back at me. Her expression is still the same - as stiff and as taut as wire. I wonder if it's because of facelifts. Or maybe she was just born this emotionally dead. I was distracting myself again.
"You must have a death wish," I say.
"No. We only choose to assert our dominance and power over all organizations in order to effectively carry out our duties."
"Peace on this earth?"
"Yes."
I stare at her. There must be something else. Namjoon couldn't be this important for her to spite the Aamon like this. Did she not know how precarious I was with control of my powers?
"Tell me what it is you really want."
"Your allegiance to PETRA." Tanya doesn't even hesitate.
Allegiance? PETRA wanted my dumb, blind loyalty to their organization?
"And in return?"
"Both Namjoon and Seokjin will be released."
I consider for a moment as I stare at her. She didn't seem to be joking. I'm not sure if there's even a single ounce of humour in her body.
"You have much to gain by siding with us, Your Highness. All will be forgiven. We will provide you wealth, influence and respect beyond what you have now. All Courts will bow down to you. You would not be able to imagine how much power you hold in your hands."
*Succumb to the urges and you will lose yourself.*
"And if I don't?"
"We will kill both your friends." As if in testament to how serious she was, the soldier behind Jin comes forward, loudly clocking his gun before he rests it against Jin's temple.
"Taehyung, don't," I hear Jin whisper.
In response, the soldier shoots him.
I jump, staring as Jin screams, his right thigh bleeding profusely from the wound. Jin keels over - I'm not sure whether he's unconscious or not, before the soldier reaches forward, gripping him by his hair and pulling him to sit upright again.
The control I have on my power slips, and I feel the energy coursing through my veins. The restrainers at my ankles melt, and the file I'd been resting my hand on catches fire.
I shift my focus to Tanya.
"Are you not afraid of me?" I ask her in earnest. "I could sink this entire island if I wanted to. I could burn all your assets to the ground. I could pull you straight to Hell right now. Does this not scare you?"
"It does," she answers so bluntly that I feel myself hesitate. Was this woman alright? "But it is this fear that can be utilized to press the other Courts into submission. Peace can only be achieved through fear of punishment. Your presence will lend weight to our moral argument."
What the hell was she even saying?
Weight to a moral argument? Peace through fear of punishment? Submission?
I stand, the metal tabletop slowly melting at my touch.
"I was made Aamon to protect souls - to ensure Heaven and Hell worked as they were, because freewill was always a right that I was to uphold. If submission is your only option, then the only person I'll see in Hell is you."
"Why do you think Hell was created in the first place, Your Highness? Lack of fear only opens the doorways to chaos. Your influence will stop that."
"And if I say no? Do you not fear the amount of destruction I will throw on this organization if you kill Jin and Namjoon?"
"Not as much as you fear losing them."
That hits me like a ton of bricks.
She was right. I was equating the fate of the world to the fear of losing them. The scales were not equal. I feel my power slowly dissipate as I calm down, the fire on the table extinguishing quickly.
"Your Highness, your allegiance to PETRA will only seek to promote further peace in the supernatural community. If we are able to work together, we will be able to solve societal problems at a much faster rate. The utopia you dream of will become reality. There will be no conflicts on this earth. No one will be brave enough to incite any."
I stare at Jin and Namjoon.
Namjoon is awake, staring back at me. He dares not say anything because the soldier behind him has a gun pressed against his back. Jin is still. His head is slumped back and his leg is still oozing silver blood. If he died here, would he die forever?
"You will be able to save your friends."
I know Tanya noticed me staring at them. I shift my focus to her.
"Jin is a demon. He doesn't bleed. That's not him."
"Would you like to take the chance?"
The soldier behind Jin moves again, pressing the gun against the back of Jin's head. His head flops forward from the act, his hair covering his face.
"If you kill him and it is an imposter, then it will only be your loss. If you kill him and it turns out to be the real Jin, then I will have nothing to lose. Only Jin's presence is holding me back. If you kill him, I will destroy every. Person. In. This. Organization. I will hunt each of you down and personally see to it that you are pulled to Hell and remain there for all eternity. You will lose either way. Let me speak to him."
For once, Tanya has nothing to say, only staring back at me. She finally raises her right hand, glancing over her shoulder to the soldiers, and nods her head.
The glass wall separating me from Namjoon and Jin is swallowed into the ground as I walk towards them.
The multiple soldiers around us brace their weapons, and the soldier behind Jin tightens his hold on the trigger.
I stop a distance away, not wanting to spook the soldiers too much.
"Jin. Talk to me."
It takes several seconds, but Jin pulls himself up, leaning heavily against his chair as he looks up at me. It's been a long time since I've seen him this weak, and the first time I've seen him this… defeated.
"Taehyung," he says, voice whisper soft. "Don't."
It was now or never.
I raise my hand, calling on to my power. The gun flies into my open palm as all the other soldiers react at the same time, positioning their weapons to shoot at me. I make a swiping motion with my free arm, throwing forward a burst of power that throws them all back, shattering the glass around us and knocking them unconscious.
With the gun in hand, I fire four rounds, two into Namjoon and two into Jin. The blood splatters wildly, and their bodies tense, before slumping over sideways, dripping silver and red blood onto the floor.
I turn around and point the last, remaining round at Tanya, who finally stares back with emotion in her eyes - alarm.
I'd done all that in a second and a half, a new record for myself in defeating a room full of enemies. I should be feeling proud of myself if not for the rising panic in my gut. I'd just killed Jin and Namjoon.
"You just killed your friends."
"You were right," I start, clocking the gun loudly in my hand. "I fear losing them more than I fear the entire world crashing down in flames."
Tanya raises her hands to show she is unarmed.
"As the Aamon, I shouldn't have anything holding me back, right? You have no more hold against me, and there is nothing stopping me from pulling the trigger."
I let my arm fall to the side as I stare at her.
"Fear doesn't equate respect. Your entire organization consists only of humans. Any Court could end you. But we won't. You know why? Because we recognize the importance of your organization. If your objective is noble, entities will naturally gravitate towards it. But if you continue doing this, don't expect your organization to flourish."
Tanya only stares, a stricken look on her face.
"You don't have to do this, Tanya. Your investigations already proved that my Court did no wrong. I can't enter into an alliance with PETRA because the Aamon has to remain neutral. You don't have to go around hurting people just to be heard."
I pull at the magazine, letting the lone bullet drop to the floor.
"I formally reject your offer of allegiance. I do not wish for more wealth, or influence, or respect. I only wish to do my job as Aamon. The next time PETRA tries to stop me will be the last."
The portal appears to my extreme right, moving forward at blinding speed, swallowing everything in its path.
"I wish only the best for you, Tanya."

**

I drop against the ground, immediately scampering up to stand. Caine runs to Namjoon while I, to Jin.
"They shot at them?" Caine exclaims, untying the ropes around Namjoon's wrists.
"No, I did." Both Caine and Jungkook stare at me, incredulous looks on their faces. "I needed to be convincing." I melt the binds holding Jin against his seat, and he collapses. Jungkook manages to catch him, before laying him against the ground.
"Your friend here isn't breathing," Caine says.
"Namjoon, wake up," I call.
He immediately opens his eyes, sitting up as he coughs a few times.
"I've been holding my breath for at least two minutes."
Caine stares at him in confusion, before turning to me.
"What?"
"Bulletproof vest," I explain, as Namjoon lifts his shirt up.
A black bulletproof vest is exposed, two bullets wedged against the material, right in the middle of his chest.
Caine stares for a moment, picking out a bullet before he studies it. "You two planned this?"
I nod.
He throws the bullet aside, giving Namjoon only a cursory glance.
"What were you thinking?" Caine bites, staring daggers at me. "Endangering the life of a human like this! There were a million ways that could have gone wrong."
"I was thinking of a way to get out of there." I rest my lips against Jin's, throwing my power forward and straight into him. I feel his injuries heal beneath me, the tears in his skin patching themselves together. I let go just as the headache starts forming, and panic.
"He isn't waking up," I breathe.
"Zap him," Caine says, without even looking up.
"Excuse me?"
"He's wounded as a human. A powerful electric shock should be enough to jumpstart his magic."
"You sure?"
"By all means, do let the Heir of Hell die."
I call on to lightning, letting it flow into my hands. My hands start glowing white, crackling with electricity as I stare unsurely at Jin. Here goes nothing.
I slam my hands against his chest, and Jin's back arches. His eyes pop wide open and he coughs, landing on his back again.
He pushes himself off the ground just enough to spit out two bullets, before collapsing again, eyes already closed.
"You okay?"
"Yeah," he nods, before going still.

**

"How is he?" I ask, as Caine sits by the edge of the bed, carefully dressing the wound on Namjoon's temple, where the bat had socked him pretty hard.
"I'm fine, Taehyung," Namjoon muses. He winces at a tender spot Caine has touched.
"Caine!" I scold.
"He'll be fine, Taehyung," Caine patiently answers, not looking up. "Namjoon here should be as good as new by morning."
He snips off the edge of the bandage, placing the first aid kit on the bedside table. "Rest and recuperate for a while," he tells Namjoon. "The magic in the iv drip should heal you completely in a few hours - but only if you remain on bedrest."
Namjoon nods, relaying his thanks, and Caine leaves not long after.
"Where's Jungkook?" Namjoon asks.
"Asleep. It's way past dawn and he has a meeting before dusk."
"He's a busy child."
"He's going to be Head of his Court soon," I say. "He has to make sure he's prepared for the role."
"He'll be a good leader. He's learning from a lot of good role models."
I can only smile in reply. "Namjoon, listen… I'm sorry for what happened back there."
"Didn't we agree to let me be shot?"
"It still hurt."
"And I survived."
"You put yourself in danger."
"Yet here I am, fit as a fiddle."
"You got hurt because of me."
"Were you the one swinging the bat?"
I stare at him, before shaking my head in disbelief. "Namjoon, you nearly died."
"But I didn't."
"You're so stubborn!"
Namjoon only smiles calmly. "I told you. I'm alright, Taehyung. It was my choice to help you. You've already done so much to help me."
"I've done nothing," I sigh, taking a seat on the bed.
"You're so selfless," Namjoon chuckles. "You accepted me into your Court. You protected me, even when you could've chosen to leave me and save Jin. I owe you."
"And you volunteered yourself even when you knew there was a chance you wouldn't survive. Do you know how stupid that was? You're human! I can't even use magic to heal you!"
"It wouldn't have worked if I wasn't there," Namjoon quietly points out. And he spoke the truth. Both PETRA and I had planned to use Namjoon as leverage, as a bargaining chip for our own needs. Namjoon could've died.
But he'd just went along with it.
"What if you had died?" I say. "I'm sorry, Namjoon. I never should've put you in the line of fire."
"Taehyung, I'm alright." He reaches out to place a hand against mine, squeezing it reassuringly. "We saved Jin. You got away from PETRA. Everything's okay."
I find my eyes b with tears again as I stare at him. How could anyone be so selfless?
I see Namjoon hesitate as he notices my expression and I throw myself against his legs, sobbing out loud.
"Hey!" Namjoon soothes, the surprise evident in his voice. I feel him rest a hand on my back as he rubs it in comfort. "Taehyung, it's okay."
How was it that I was the Aamon - arguably the most powerful individual on earth - and Namjoon was a mere human exiled from his own organization, yet here I was, the one needing reassurance from him. I guess even with the power scales shifted, Namjoon would somehow always be the leader I looked up to, even when I tried to deny it.
"Thank you for taking me in," I hear him say. "Thank you for trusting me to help you in your mission. It's okay now. You got it. You did a great job."
Did I? Did I really do a great job - after nearly getting both him and Jin killed, after insulting one of the most powerful organizations on earth, after bluntly telling Namjoon - who literally risked his life for me - that I didn't trust him?
I straighten, sitting up again. "I'm sorry I ever doubted you, Namjoon. I was wrong. I misjudged you."
"Relax," he muses. "You're the Aamon. It's your job to be wary of others."
"You really think PETRA would leave you alone now?" I ask him.
"They'd never leave me alone," Namjoon answers, a somber look in his eyes. "My father was a director. My brother and I have been in the organization since as long as we can remember. It would be adding salt to their wound to see me alive and kicking."
"What should I do about it?"
"Nothing. Leave it. It's not a fate I can avoid."
My heart falls at his words. Was there any way to run away from fate then? "We'll protect you," I say. "As long as Jin, Jungkook and I are alive, we'll keep you safe. They won't touch you."
Namjoon smiles tightly, resting a hand on the top of my head. It's such a familiar feeling that I nearly burst into tears right there and then.
"Concentrate on your duties, Taehyung. There are things bigger than me."

**

I leave the room, shutting the door behind me and see Caine standing in the hallway, reading a letter that was very, very obviously addressed to me.
"When will you stop going through my documents unauthorized?" I sniffle, wiping my tear tracks away as I stand before him.
"When you relinquish my position as Official Heavenly Advisor to the Aamon's Court," he answers, passing the letter to me.
"Adam gave you that position," I point out, taking the letter and reading it.
"Guess you'll be stuck with me for a while," he says, offering a handkerchief from his pocket.
"Thank you," I murmur, blowing my nose into it.
"Keep it," Caine replies, crossing his arms as he leans against the wall. "Your affairs are not yet done."
"They never will be," I sigh, slipping the letter back into the envelope. "What will you do now?"
"Now? Probably go back to Heaven and explain why the Heir to the Kingdom of Hell nearly died."
"Awww, they know?" I whine.
"His near death shook the Hereafter. Even Lucifer probably already knows."
"I'm sorry," I sigh, sinking into the bench behind me. "Do you want me to come up with you?"
Caine shakes his head. "You have enough on your plate for now. I'll speak to Adam - he'll relay the message to anyone he deems necessary."
"Thanks, Caine. For everything. I would say I owe you my life, but I owe you more than that." I lean my head back, resting it against the wall and sigh again. I'm beginning to think that no matter how many hours I sleep, the exhaustion I feel is permanent.
Caine takes a seat by my side. He says nothing, and I say nothing.
"Are you mad at me?" I ask, after the silence between us lengthens.
"Taehyung, I'm not mad at you. I'm a bit shocked about what you did, but I'm not mad."
"Do you think there was a better way?"
Caine is quiet for a few long, tangible seconds. "To save both Azazel and Namjoon without affecting your Court's standing and insulting PETRA further? None that I can think of." He finally turns to face me, smiling slightly. "You know, kid, when I first met you, I didn't even like you. All I saw was a bratty eighteen year old with attachment issues."
"I don't have attachment issues."
"So the 'bratty' part is true?"
I smile in response.
"But I misjudged you. You are a good person. Somewhat dumb and a bit too stubborn for your own good, but a good person despite. I wouldn't have been able to make a decision as delicate as the one you made today."
"What would you have done?"
"Me? I would've destroyed PETRA. I would have eradicated everyone from the top tier to the bottom. PETRA would fade out of existence."
"Maybe that's why I'm the Aamon and you're not."
Caine chuckles. "You're looking at the man who killed his own brother out of jealousy. I am far from fit to be Aamon."
I chuckle as well, although I'm not really sure I find it funny. It has been several millenia since the first murder, since Caine killed Abel, and yet Caine carries the burden as if the crime had just been committed yesterday.
"Do you do all that you do in the hopes that God will forgive you one day?"
Caine is silent, and for a moment, I think that I've overstepped some boundaries.
"God punished me with two things - guilt and immortality. Every day since the murder, I have served Heaven with a singular purpose - to be forgiven. I would like to think that God will forgive me one day, Taehyung, but only if I work hard enough."
"Do you think that applies to everyone?"
Caine considers his answer for a moment. "I think so long as there is sincerity and action, God will forgive anyone. Even Azazel."
I look up to see Caine staring at me, a patient look in his eyes.
"I know you love him, and I know you want to save him. But I think it will only be through Azazel's efforts that he will achieve what he desires. And who's to say that's even his goal anymore?"
"It's always been his goal."
"Perhaps." Caine shifts to face me. "Will you love him any less if he doesn't achieve it?"
I frown, staring at him. "What do you mean?"
"If he remains a demon, then your relationship will not prosper."
"There is no relationship between Jin and I."
Caine tilts his head. "No?"
"He's a Heir to the Kingdom of Hell and I am the Fifth Aamon. We are destined to be enemies in battle. One day, we might even have to kill each other."
"You can change that."
"How?"
"You humanize him."
I roll my eyes, sighing as I lean my head back. "I'm killing him."
"No. He's killing himself. If he dies then, he dies with a soul."
That has me sitting up again. "A soul?"
"And then there will be no battle to fight."
I consider for a moment. "Why are you telling me this?"
Caine shrugs. "Star-crossed lovers, the two of you."
"We're not lovers," I bite back. "He's -"
"Heir to the Kingdom of Hell and you are the Fifth Aamon. Give it up already. It's repetitive."
I bite my tongue, sinking into my seat. "But it's true. There shouldn't be anything more. Relationships are complicated."
"I'll give you that," Caine murmurs in agreement. He stands, brushing dust off his lapel and I stare.
"Let me follow you back to Heaven."
"Why?" he asks, glancing over his shoulder at me.
"Let me get the nagging. I deserve it."
Caine considers for a moment, before he shrugs. "Suit yourself."
He reaches for his pocket, taking something out. "Here," he says, pressing something onto my hand. "Return this to Azazel."
I stare. It's the ring.
The gem is a different colour.

**

It's still morning when I return, though I'm not sure whether it's still the same date. Adam and I had argued for what felt like hours, literally having a go for each other's necks if it weren't for Pakal and Sobekneferu stopping us. Maybe it is in our nature, but both Adam and I didn't get along. He was a mentor, a guide and a protector, but our values and morals were different. Adam wanted to protect the sanctity of the Court while I wanted to make sure that my rule was inclusive to everyone. He'd yelled at me for saving Namjoon, and I'd yelled at him for wanting to leave him. He'd yelled at me for rejecting the offer of allegiance, and I'd yelled at him for being power-greedy.
You get the point. Adam was the sky, and I was the ground that never touched him.
We had eventually made up, as we always do, before Caine returned me to Earth. And now I walk the length of the empty hallways of my Parliament's Court, alone and unbothered. I'm exhausted, but at this rate, it's just a permanent state of mind.
I pass by the fourth guestroom, which was being used as Jin's recuperation room. I pause.
I hadn't seen him since reviving him, but Caine had told me that Jin would probably be asleep for a while. As a demon, sleep was not a necessity for Jin. Most entities need sleep in order to either conserve or create energy, but sleep to demons was mostly just a way to pass time. Caine had kept Jin in a state of slumber because Jin was weak, needing sustenance. With what he'd been through in PETRA, probably the only thing that would adequately satisfy him would be engulfing souls. For our own safety, Jin was kept asleep.
I had no reason to, but I enter his room.
Just as expected, Jin is on the bed, in deep slumber - about the only time his forehead is not creased in worry. I come to his side, sitting on the bed as I stare at his peaceful face. Jin isn't moving - he doesn't need to breathe.
I reach out, tucking a lock of hair behind his ear. His face is so unfamiliarly serene that I pause.
"You tell me I don't tell you shhit and then you go ahead and pull this right under my nose," I murmur, resting my hand against his chest. I don't know why I'm talking when he clearly isn't listening. Maybe I just needed to get this off my chest. "You could've told me what was going on. You know I would've fought to protect you guys." I stare at his face, feeling a growing sense of pain the longer I stare. "Why do you do this to yourself? To me? Why couldn't you wait for my decision?" I sigh.
I somehow expect, by some miracle, that Jin would wake up and look at me, say something in disagreement, call me an idiot - anything really. But his eyes remain closed.
I sigh, leaning back to rest my weight against my palms when something in my back pocket pokes me. I reach for the pocket, slipping out the ring Caine had handed me.
I stare at the ring.
I *know* I'm not tripping, but I'm pretty sure the gem on this ring had been purple when Namjoon had shown it to me. But it's red now.
I hold it up against the artificial light, as if it would solve some sort of mystery.
Nothing. It's still red. Maybe I hadn't been looking properly. I glance at Jin, staring at his hand before I decide to slip the ring onto his middle finger.
The ring immediately starts glowing and I get off the bed, taking a step back as I stare in bewilderment. What was happening?
The light travels up Jin's hand, onto his arm and pretty soon filling his entire body in the blinding white light.
I don't know what to do other than stare at Jin glowing like a light bulb.
Pretty soon, the light disappears and I catch Jin opening his eyes in angry confusion. He sits up, before turning to me.
"What happened?"
I stare. I thought Caine said he'd need a few days of sleep before he'd wake up. What the hell was in that ring?
I don't know what to say, or even how to react, choosing to move only on instinct.
"You bombed my Court and have the audacity to ask what happened?" I roar, throwing a burst of power in Jin's direction.
He leaps off the bed, barely missing the blast as it burns a hole into the head board.
I stalk forward, just as Jin backs up a step.
"You told Namjoon to keep Jungkook in the library while you burned my fcuking Court down. You could've killed him!"
"He wouldn't have died," Jin growls, sounding surprisingly cranky for someone who'd just gotten several full hours of sleep while I'd had none. "I gave him a ring to protect them."
"It doesn't matter to me! I don't care that you had a fcuking protection spell and gave it to Namjoon!" I screech. "You actively put my child in danger!"
"I would never do that!"
"You just did!" I retaliate. "It kills me inside that every time I say to myself I trust you, you do this shiit to prove me wrong!"
"I was doing it to protect you!" Jin's anger was escalating, perhaps soon being higher than mine.
"You put everyone else's lives in danger! I am the Aamon - if I can't protect anyone, what's the fcuking point?!"
"And what about me, hmm?" he snaps. "I suppose I should have just let PETRA come and attack you?"
"I could've handled it."
"Do you know what they were going to do?" I stop in my tracks as I stare at Jin. "They were going to drop missiles on Jungkook and your Court. We might survive the blast, but Jungkook, Namjoon and the other Lycans wouldn't! I had to destroy the Courts before they did!"
"And you couldn't tell me this? You don't think we could just work together and think of something?"
"The information came from Namjoon. He had intel in PETRA that I found believable. You told him to his face that you didn't trust him!"
"But I trust you!" I yell back. I don't know if our voices are travelling outside this room when Jin starts to whisper a silencing spell around us. "Or at least, I did."
"I never broke your fcuking trust!" he stalks forward and I plant both feet firmly on the ground as I stare at him. "I couldn't risk the danger."
"You keep giving me the same bullshiit excuse -"
"It's the same excuse because it's the truth!" Jin yells loud enough to ring in my ears. "You think I would have just sat to the side and allow you to get hurt? To let Jungkook be in danger?"
"But you think we would've been fine if you put your life on the line like that?" I counter. "I'm not saying what you did was wrong. I'm angry that you didn't think I was strong enough to deal with them! What if the rescue plan had gone wrong? What if I never figured out what happened to you? Do you think I would be able to live with myself if that happened?"
"You literally shot me!"
"I did what I had to do under those circumstances!" I bite back.
Jin runs his hands through his hair, tugging at his roots in frustration. "My God, you're so stubborn!"
"And you're selfish!"
"How?" Jin practically exasperates.
"You are acting in *my* capacity as the Aamon. You didn't think of the danger you were putting my Court in by just waltzing into PETRA like that?"
"I was doing what needed to be done."
"You could've died!"
"I would've been fine with it!" Jin roars.
I'm silenced, the volume of his voice shocking me and the content of his sentence making me realise what he'd just done.
"You wanted to die, didn't you?" I know I'm hitting a spot - a topic Jin had constantly refused to speak on, to allow his mind to be changed. "You never planned to come back alive."
At Jin's silence, I continue on. "It has been like this every time you leave me for a mission. You try to sacrifice your life and hope to die. You still think sacrificing your life for Creation will bring you some sort of salvation."
Jin still says nothing.
"I hate you." He finally moves at my sentence, a small, simple change of emotions that is loud on his face. "You do this to me and Jungkook and expect us to just watch in silence. Every time you leave seems like another suicide mission and we don't even know if you'll ever come back."
"You don't understand."
"You're moving on dumb luck. *You* don't understand. No Holy book has ever stated suicide as a way of salvation!"
"I'm not like other Creation."
"How?" I say, realising I'm starting to raise my voice again. "How are you any different? You move and talk and think the same. You make good and bad decisions just like any other Creation. You have emotions and tears and laughter just like every other Creation I know. Tell me, how are you different?"
"Enough!" Jin yells.
"See?" I bite. "Every time I talk about this, you get touchy and try to avoid it. I'm telling you one simple fcuking thing. You don't need to die to tell God that you're a good person!"
"You would never understand."
"Isn't this the same Jin who fought his own father just to protect the attendees at my coronation? Isn't this the same person who gave his own blood to Jungkook to save his life? Isn't this the same Jin who hurtled straight into Heaven like some fool because he'd wanted to save me?"
Jin is quiet as he stares at me.
"You keep telling me you want to die. Don't. Live. Live for me and Jungkook and anyone else you think you'd want to spend more time with."
"I don't want to fulfill the prophecy. I don't want to fight you."
"We'll change it," I say. "Just like how we've changed multiple prophecies before this. I don't want you to leave me."
Maybe it's just a catch of the light, but I see Jin's eyes shine, almost glazing over.
"You have more humanity in you than so many people I know. You are kind and selfless and caring. If God really cared. If He really listened, He'd know the kind of person you are."
One lone tear drop falls down Jin's face.
He looks away, stepping back as he walks away from me.
"What if it doesn't work?" he says. "What if we end up fighting each other to the death?"
"The orbs are not inevitable. Prophecies change."
"I would rather kill myself than take the chance."
I hide a sigh. And Jin called *me* stubborn.
"Okay," I say, anger fully spent as I sit down on bed, still facing him. "But until that happens, we'll find other alternatives."
Silence falls between us, as Jin doesn't answer, and I don't have anything to add on to.
"I'm sorry," he finally says. "I didn't want to put you in danger - or anyone else for that matter. I thought I could deal with it alone."
"You're not alone," I say. "Never."
He turns to me, glancing over his shoulder at my words.
"You have me, and Jungkook, and Caine too, I guess. You don't have to deal with things alone anymore. I'm sorry I got angry over your selflessness."
"It wasn't selflessness that drove me to do what I did," Jin quietly says.
"But you still did it anyway. So, thank you."
We fall into silence for a few moments.
"Is Namjoon alright?" Jin asks. "You shot him."
"He had a bulletproof vest underneath."
"And you knew?"
"I told him to wear it."
"And Jungkook?"
"He's fine. He's made of demons, vampires and lycans. He's a tough cookie."
I catch Jin fiddling with the ring he still has on. The gem is completely transparent now.
"You know," I say. "I could have sworn the ring had a purple gem when Namjoon gave it to me. I passed it to Caine and he gave it back to me with the gem red."
"The gem isn't real," Jin says, slipping the ring off his finger. "It acts as a spell container. Namjoon is human - I couldn't just cast a spell over his head. So I placed a protection spell on the ring and gave it to him. The purple colour matches the colour source."
"Caine gave it back red."
"He probably went to Hell and had Lucifer or one of my siblings cast a spell into it to accelerate my healing."
I stare at the ring as Jin comes forward and slips it into my middle finger. He taps the clear gem, and soon enough, the colour changes to red again.
Something hits me then.
"Caine went all the way to Hell to help you."
"Another favour I unwillingly owe him."
I smack Jin's arm. "You will thank him."
Jin throws me a cursory glare. "I never asked to be saved."
I stare at him, wondering why, despite the slim chances, despite the unlikelihood, despite everything, he still so wanted to give death a chance.
"I would save you. Countlessly."
"… I know." Jin sits by my side on the bed.
I study him as Jin stares at the ring on my finger.
"You've done so much for me, for us," I say, as he glances up at me. "I wish I could do more."
"You've done more than you realise."
I smile softly up at him. There's isn't much to say - and there's nothing much I can do.
And then Jin smiles back. He laughs mirthlessly, perhaps at the utter ridiculousness of this whole thing. The stark realization hits me as I watch.
I love this man.
I don't know why it's taken this long to realise this, don't know *why* it's taken me this situation to accept it, but I love him. Illogically and irrationally enough - despite the warnings I've heard from maybe ten different people, I love him.
"How are your thoughts?"
"Quiet for now," I say. "But I might give therapy a chance."
"With Yunho?"
"No. With Adam."
"You hate Adam."
"I don't hate him. We're just not best friends. And he always makes the most sense out of the people I know."
"You would go up to Heaven after being trapped there for two whole years."
"I don't have a choice. It's my responsibility as Aamon. And what will you do while I'm gone?"
"Repay Caine's favour. The sooner I get it over and done with, the better."
"Good," I quietly say, more to myself than to Jin. "The busier we are, the less time for thoughts."
He reaches for my hand, squeezing it tightly in his. It's a quiet reassurance, an anchor to the ground.
I close my eyes. I had so much to deal with. Sometimes it feels like it's too much.
"You'll be alright."
I open my eyes and turn to Jin.
"I know," I say. "I'm just a bit overwhelmed."
"Do you know what I see when I look into your mind?" Jin asks, taking his hand away.
"The voices in my head?"
"Worries," he corrects. "You worry for me, for Jungkook. For Heaven, for Caine. For Namjoon, for PETRA, for Sikyung and so many others. But you don't worry for yourself."
"I'm the Aamon," I say. "My priorities are different."
"You don't worry about what might happen to you in the future?"
I shake my head. "I've accepted it, come what may. But for those around me, I'll do what I can."
"There's a prophecy about to be fulfilled."
I lean back, flopping down on the bed as I stare up at the ceiling.
"Which prophecy?" I say. "The one where your loyalty shifts from your dad to me, inciting his rage? Or the one where you die from the lack of power from Hell? Or the one where we fight to the death to avoid the end of the world?"
Jin is quiet.
"Every prophecy is trying to scare me into submission," I say, resting my arm against my forehead. "Into listening to my Parliament, the Archangels, Caine, the Aamons, the Courts. Why can't I just live one day at a time?"
"Because we want to avoid the calamities that might happen."
I bolt up to sit upright and turn to Jin. "I've avoided every calamity so far. My coronation becoming a massacre, Lucifer coming up to incite war, the civil war in Heaven *and* the one in Hell. I've changed it all!"
Jin continues his silence as he listens.
"I have my visions that warn me and I have the power to protect the people around me. But why am I still forced to tiptoe?"
"Because we're scared." Jin's quiet answer surprises me. "And unlike you, we don't see what's coming. We don't have your powers. We only have the warnings."
He shifts his body to face me.
"What if we wake up one day and everything changes? What if I suddenly become wild and try to hurt you?"
"You wouldn't -"
"Right now I wouldn't. But it is in my nature to do it. One day, my loyalties might change. My heart may be with you, Taehyung, but my body is tied to my father."
I stare into Jin's eyes. He was right. No matter what, he was still his father's child. He was still tied to Hell.
"If it comes to it," Jin says, a hand on my elbow. "Don't hesitate to kill me."
"Jin," I attempt to argue. "We'll change the prophecy. We've done it before!"
"If you lose the battle against me, Taehyung, only death and destruction will befall this Earth. Never allow that to happen, do you understand me?"
*There are bigger things than me.*
Namjoon's words resonate in my mind.
"Okay." I squeeze his hand in return. "Will you be afraid of dying?"
"I'm afraid of many things," he says. "Dying amongst them."
"Yet you still hurtle yourself into suicide every time you get the chance."
"I know."
"Can I continue to try and stop you?"
"Did I ever stop you before?"
"Countlessly."
"Has that ever stopped you?"
"No," I say, as Jin smiles in amusement.
"Can I say something?" he quietly asks.
"What?"
"I've lived for a long, long time. It gets tiresome to be alive sometimes." I tilt my head in confusion, not understanding what Jin is getting at. "But you give me a reason to wake up every day." He raises his hand, resting it gently on my cheek. "Thank you."
What is this feeling I'm currently feeling in my chest? A sense of indescribable sadness and pain, yet relief and care.
"You should go," Jin says as his hand falls away. "You only have a few hours left of sleep before we start the day."
I lean forward, kissing his lips. I don't know what makes me move, but it seemed like the right thing to do. Jin freezes, not even breathing as I gauge a reaction.
"Rest well," I finally say, getting up to leave, when he suddenly grabs my wrist. It is a rough enough action that tugs me back, and I spin around just as Jin stands, bumping against his chest.
He has a hand on my waist, another still grasping tightly on to my wrist as I stare back at him in alarm.
For two solid seconds, neither of us say anything, before Jin finally closes the distance between us, kissing me softly on the lips. I find myself disarming almost immediately, as his hold on my wrist relaxes and his hand on my waist tightens, pulling me closer against him.
The bliss of the feel of his lips on mine falls nothing short of euphoria.
I could lose him, I realise. I could lose everything I had in a blink of an eye. My position as Aamon guaranteed little to no safety, and with the Heir of Hell by my side, I endangered myself even more.
I didn't want to lose him. I refuse to lose him - or anyone else I had around me. I would lay down my life to protect them.
Even if it meant putting myself in danger. Even if it meant stopping Jin from killing himself. Even if it meant he'd hate me.
I wouldn't let him die.
I part the kiss, resting my forehead against his.
"Stay with me. Forever."
He smiles - a disarming, innocent smile that physically hurts me in my chest, bur says nothing.
I straighten, looking into his eyes. "I think I'm in love with you. That's definitely a problem." I'm scared and nervous all of a sudden. Would I lose him?
"I thought you hated me," is Jin's calm answer.
"Fifty-fifty."
"So what's the other fifty?"
I look up at him.
Jin has always been a familiar face in my life. I've known him since I was twelve and thought I knew everything about him that I needed to know. But I was wrong. I knew so little, and every day, it seemed like I was learning something new.
Like right now.
I'm learning how much fear he hides despite how reckless he acts, how his ego only covers his insecurities, how his heart, despite the conditions of his birth, is as pure as a child's.
"I love you."
Jin's eyebrows come together in confusion. "How can you say that so easily?"
"I have nothing to lose."
I feel the hand he has on my waist clench into a fist, gripping on to the hem of my shirt tightly as he tenses up. Jin is afraid.
"Nothing?"
I reach up, framing Jin's face with both of my hands.
"I won't lose whatever I have in my hands. I will fight every war, change every prophecy to make sure what I have remains with me."
I am staring straight into Jin's eyes as he stares back. He is as tense as coiled wire.
"I won't lose you," I whisper. "So will you at least stay with me?"
And as I stare, I see the emotion slowly return in Jin's eyes. They start to shine, catching every ounce of light that hits them. One tear falls from his face, straight to my hand. I don't move, staring adamantly up at Jin.
And then he kisses me, closing the distance between us as he wraps both arms around me this time, kissing me like I was his much needed salvation.
"Yes," I hear him whisper between the kisses. "Yes."
I wrap my arms around his neck, pulling him closer towards me. Our bodies fit like two pieces of a puzzle, and we hold each other as if we are about to part for eternity.
I feel myself gently falling backwards, onto the bed as Jin parts our kiss. He looms over me, holding his weight with his hands as I stare up at him.
"Why are you still crying?" I ask, as I reach up to wipe at his cheek with my thumb.
"Because I'm afraid," Jin confesses. "I'm afraid to haave you. And I'm afraid to lose you."
"The Heir to the Kingdom of Hell crying," I lightly tease. "What would your father say?"
I smile at him, hoping to ease whatever fear Jin was feeling. Jin doesn't smile back. He is still conflicted, still afraid.
"You still love me even when I'm Azazel, Son of the Demon King himself."
I say nothing, letting my hand fall away.
"You still love me despite my sins which are unforgivable."
One more tear drop falls, landing exactly on my cheek. I'm still staring up at Jin, unbothered by the same.
"You still love me even when you've seen my frightening demon form."
Jin's face is warped in anger and confusion. He doesn't understand his own emotions and it pains him.
"Thank you," he finally says, "for loving me."
I reach up, resting my hands on his jaw as I rise to kiss him. Jin immediately has a hand on the small of my back, supporting me as he reciprocates the kiss.
His lips taste salty from his tears as he lowers me onto the bed again. I feel trickles of power instinctively transfer from the both of us to each other as our powers react to our contact. It only made the kiss more euphoric.
I feel Jin's hand start to travel up my hip, tickling my waist as he stops to undo the lowest button. I wrap an arm around his neck, pulling him closer. The entirety of his frame seemed to mold seamlessly into mine.
"Mama!"
Oh *fcuk*.
The high from the euphoria is over as my parental instincts hit overdrive. I literally curl up, kicking Jin on the stomach with both my legs hard enough to send him flying off the side of the bed. He lands on the other side with a loud thump as I sit up, just as the pitter patter of feet come closer and Jin breaks the silencing spell.
Jungkook bursts my bedroom door wide open just as Jin stands, and the door slams loudly against the adjacent wall.
"I don't like having my own bedroom," my little one sobs as he runs to me, crawling onto my bed right into my open and expecting arms. I fall backwards from the entire weight of my precious one burying his head against my chest. "I woke up from my nightmare and you're not there."
I hide a laugh as I shush him. "Baby, it's alright," I soothe, instinctively running my hands through his hair. "They're just nightmares. They won't hurt you."
But Jungkook is completely still as Jin sits back down on the bed, looking on in amusement.
"I think… he's asleep again," Jin says.
As if to support that, Jungkook start snoring softly, his breathing already loud and stable in my arms.
I laugh aloud. I couldn't help it. My little one sure knew how to make an entrance.
"Oh, Jungkook," I muse. "My precious, precious child. I love you. What would I do without you."
Jin comes closer, resting a hand against the top of Jungkook's head in affection. I reach up, resting a hand against Jin's cheek again. I find that I like doing this. Jin's cheeks, though not chubby, were warm and soothing to the touch.
He glances at me, smiling softly.
"And I love you, Kim Seokjin. What would I do without you?"
Jin takes my hand, bringing it to his lips as he kisses my palm softly.
"What would I do without you?" I hear him quietly repeat. He leans forward, unexpectedly resting his lips against my forehead. "And I love you, Kim Taehyung."

===

It's been more than three years since I started this fic! I would just like to say, thank you so much to everyone, particularly to those who have been sending me supportive comments and messages. You guys have brought me through hard times. This fic has been with me since I was in my Second Year of Law School till I graduated. Amazing.

Thank you to all my readers, silent and commenting. Thank you for enjoying this little fic of mine and following despite irregular and sporadic updates.

I'm considering ending this fic soon. Maybe the next chapter might be the last, or I might make the ending into a multi-series, like I did with Taehyung and Jin's escapades in Heaven. I'm not sure yet. It's been amazing and I can't believe I put Taehyung, Jin and Jungkook through so much bull lol.

Till next time!