"Jinki, I'm moving away."

Jinki swore he heard his heart break. He stared at his food, unable to comprehend what his supposed best friend just said. His heart was heavy with the feeling of unacceptance, his head was aching from thinking. Why? Did he do something wrong? Did he ever hurt him in any way? All he ever did was look after the younger male in front of him. And out of nowhere, this is what Kibum tells him.

"Jinki, please say something."

Swallowing, he slowly lifted his head to look at Kibum who was sitting across him from the little dinner table. "Why," Jinki looked back down, "why do you wanna leave?"

Jinki knew for sure that it wasn't because of his job. Kibum always had this glow when talking about his job at the hospital. And Jinki also sees him around the hospital and yes, he could see that Kibum was enjoying what his job could offer. On rare times that they work together, Kibum as the nurse and Jinki as the doctor, Jinki would watch the younger work and he'd think that Kibum was born to do this. It's clear that the job isn't Kibum's reason behind his decision.

Jinki also believes it can't be the people around him. In the years that Kibum has been working in the hospital, he had made his own circle of friends, Jinki also included in that circle of course. There was Jonghyun and Taemin, both nurses who would often be with Kibum during breaks. And there was Minho, a fellow doctor. Somehow, the three of them got involved in Jinki and Kibum's friendship and since then, the five of them would always spend time together.

It couldn't be because of the neighborhood either, Jinki tells himself. Kibum loved their neighbors. He would play with Sehunnie who lives next door when his mom would ask him to look after the child during days when she knew she'd get home late. He also used to tutor Jongin and helped him pass his English subject. Kibum would always interact with the old lady who lives across their house. She adored him and would bake cookies for both Jinki and Kibum every weekends. Kibum would always muse about how there was a 24/7 grocery round the corner and there was an ice cream parlor a few blocks ahead. And how there were lots of fast food chains around, and that there was a park nearby where they could relax.

"I.. I just," Kibum hesitated.

"Are you tired of me already," Jinki looked at him straight in the eyes, "do you wanna go?"

Kibum shaked his head vigorously, "No that's not it, hyung.."

Jinki felt the tears about to spill but he held it back. He can't let Kibum see him cry, "Then why? I've been your friend for years, why now, Kibum?"

"Hyung," Kibum hesitated but talked anyway, "you wouldn't want to know why. You wouldn't understand."

Jinki scowled, "Don't be selfish Kibum. You're already leaving me here alone, might as well tell me why."

"Because," Kibum took a deep breath, "I love you."

Jinki stayed quiet and stared at him with an unreadable expression. Kibum chuckled bitterly. "See hyung? This is why I have to move out," Kibum stated with a sad smile, "You won't understand. And you probably hate me. You're probably disgusted too."

Kibum stood up from his seat and headed to his room, "I'll pack up now. So that I could leave. I know you no longer want me here." Jinki stared at the empty seat in front of him. The past few minutes was quite a roller coaster of emotions. He looked down on his plate, took a deep breath, and went to the room of the younger.

He quietly opened the door. Kibum's back was facing him, but he was clearly crying, struggling to keep his sobs down. In that moment, all Jinki wanted to do was to wrap his arms around Kibum and never let him go. He cleared his throat to get the other's attention and Kibum visibly stiffened.

"Kibum," Jinki called out gently.

"A-ah. Sorry hyung. I'll pack up f-faster. I'll ask Taemin to get the rest of m-my things. I'll leave all the clothes I borrowed from you," he said while hastily putting his clothes inside a suitcase, "Give me a few more minutes.. I'll be.." he was choking on his own silent tears, "I'll be gone. Don't worry."

Kibum didn't look back, so he didn't know that Jinki was standing directly behind him. He didn't see how much it hurt Jinki to see him crying, packing up, talking about leaving. He didn't see how Jinki scrunched up his nose, just like he usually does whenever he's close to tears. He didn't see how this affected him. He failed to see how much Jinki needed him. Loved him.

Jinki wrapped his arms around Kibum, "Don't go. Please don't leave me."

Kibum took a deep breath, "Jinki, don't you understand what I just said? I'm in love with you. And you only see me as your friend. It won't work. I'll keep hurting and just this once, I'm going to be selfish and think of myself first."

Jinki stood up. He pulled Kibum with him so now they were in the middle of Kibum's room, standing face to face. Kibum couldn't even look at him. So he gently tilted Kibum's head, so that they were looking directly at each other. Jinki saw all sorts of pain in the other's eyes and he wanted to beat himself up for causing this beautiful man such pain. But there were more important matters at hand.

"Kibum, I wish you would ask me how I feel before you leave. But it's clear that you won't do that. So I'll tell this to you myself."

"Hyung, no.."

"Shh," Jinki reached for his phone which was in his pocket and after fumbling with it for a while, a familiar melody echoed in the room. Jinki placed the phone on the bed nearby and went to face Kibum once again, "Listen."

Jinki parted his lips to sing along.

When I look into you eyes

It's like watching the night sky

Or a beautiful sunrise

There's so much they hold

And just like them old stars

I see that you've come so far

To be right where you are

How old is your soul?

Jinki wiped the tears silently streaming down Kibum's cheek. And he gently held Kibum's face close to his.

I won't give up on us

Even if the skies get rough

I'm giving you all my love

I'm still looking up

"Kibum-ah, don't leave. Please."

Kibum was sobbing while clinging to Jinki. They were slowly moving along to the song and Kibum was slowly calming down. When the song ended, Kibum slowly pulled away and looked at the man before him.

"I'll stay. For you. For us."

And Jinki swore he never felt happier in his entire life. Because if you were lucky.. no. If you were the luckiest person on earth, the person you love decides to love you back, no matter how long it takes.

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hey everyone! thanks for reading and feel free to leave a comment below <3 xx

{07.14.16} not an update, i just found typo ^^