“With the respect you deserve, you didn’t spend seven years studying how the brain works.”

Seung Hyun spent the whole night thinking how to talk to the doctor so he didn’t feel offended when he talked about how he considered the medicine he was giving to Ji Yong, or the new young patient as he called him, was giving him headaches and that maybe was an allergic reaction to the medicine.

“Who you think you are?”

But judging by the tone on his voice, he was starting to believe he didn’t really do a good job.

“I-I didn’t mean to offend you, doctor, I was just… worried because he could get worse and hurt someone?” He was actually worried something bad happened to him, but showing worry could mean he couldn’t take care of him anymore.

“I know what I am doing, Seung Hyun, now return to your work because I’m sure you have a lot to do.”

And with that, he left, not without giving him a sharp glare Seung Hyun believed he could be murdered by it. Sighing, he returned to see his patients, trying not to think about Ji Yong and how bad he felt with the medicine they were still giving to him.

Days soon turned into a week and Seung Hyun still remembered clearly that day when he helped the young boy to feel less miserable in his birthday, every time they returned from seeing the doctor, they started to talk a little about Ji Yong’s life outside this place, the older little by little starting to know more and more about him, filling him with happiness but also filling him with worry.

With every day that passed, Seung Hyun realised more how much pain and dizziness the medicine brought to Ji Yong, thing that not only made him wonder again if it was the correct one, but only made him doubt if he was sick in the first place. Ji Yong’s life had been really normal and calm till his parents died in that accident; he was even a good student with a promising future.

“Could you explain me how you felt when you killed the birds?”

“I didn’t do it…” Ji Yong continued denying it “I… don’t know how that appeared there.”

“Are you sure?”

Silence.

Furthermore, Seung Hyun had been noticing that with every day that passed Ji Yong seemed to be more distracted or out of his mind, although he was still firm over the words of him not killing those poor animals in such a sadistic way, his sentences tended to sound more trembling and with less confidence, as if he was too weak to give them the strength they needed.

“I asked you a question, Ji Yong.”

“I-I didn’t do it, I didn’t!” The other said with a slightly desperate tone, squirming on his seat and causing Seung Hyun to move and hold him although he didn’t really want to do it.

“Stop doing this harder for yourself, Ji Yong, things won’t get better if you just keep lying, we can’t help you.” The doctor again sighed, writing something on his notebook before looking up at Seung Hyun and motioning for him to step away “Lying won’t change your situation.”

Ji Yong’s eyes filled with despair while he continued looking at the doctor, his lower lip starting to tremble almost uncontrollably while he shook his head. It couldn’t be more obvious how he was fighting to say something, against his words,  repeat as he had done the first time that he wasn’t sick and wasn’t responsible of doing such disgusting acts.

But Seung Hyung could only see him failing.

“Alright then, I’ll see you tomorrow.”

♦♦♦

He had been working in that hospital for more than three years now, he had seen patient after patient getting better and walking out of the place in some cases and losing their minds completely, dying in a state of complete madness in others.  Seung Hyun thought he was used to all of this, he considered himself as part of the lowest percent of people that had witnessed everything the brain could do to someone.

He was wrong.

That day he couldn’t get rid of Ji Yong’s expression in the doctor’s room, nor his face when he helped him to lie down on the bed. It didn’t matter what he heard or saw while walking slowly on his way home, the younger’s image was always there, haunting him to a level that could be scary if he thought about it more carefully.

What if he wasn’t sick? What if the medicine was damaging his brain? What if the doctor knew it? Was that even possible?

They were delicate questions, he was pretty aware of it, accusing the doctor of this could end up with him begging for a piece of bread in the streets. Still, he didn’t know what to think anymore, if it wasn’t for the fact that he saw Ji Yong’s state the first day he arrived there and the current one, he wouldn’t believe it.

“I need to help…” He muttered once he closed the door to his apartment, tossing his backpack and coat to the sofa and making his way to his room, returning with his laptop under his arm and a warm blanket on his shoulder.

As the doctor had said that morning, he didn’t study for six years to become a doctor and knew internet’s words weren’t the absolute truth he needed, but he knew he could at least clear up some of the things that were disturbing him, or at least that was what he hoped.

 Taking a deep breath, he started to browse through several pages, blogs and forums that talked about different mental illness and the recommended medication. Stopping now and then to get a big cup of coffee, rub his eyes and glance at the clock to see the hours slowly dancing in front of him, letting him know he wasn’t going to rest this night once more.

♦♦♦

“You really