I had a dream to become a singer, to sing like free bird because it gave me happiness; Friends said I have a very good voice but I just smiled, I didn’t think my voice has some special thing. I just like to sing because I feel so nice while singing. When my friends forced me So I decided to give the audition to SM & fortunately I passed in it. It was like I got a new world to reach out my dream.

 I was just normal boy who likes to eat, sleep & sing, I like to study & help my mother in our meat shop then I became SM trainee & started my life as a singer. It was a real big world for me something beyond my imagination. When I entered into that world I saw lots of boys & girls who came into this world to prove something to become idol.

Truthfully all of them were so energetic, ambitious, fashionable & so many are much younger than me. They seemed so confident & bold, watching that I felt very envious because I was little awkward & bit a simple person. It was little hard to me to get along with them.

I never been in such type of atmosphere but to get used to all these things  I tried to smile at them & wanted to make friendship, I tried to make gags or jokes  but most of them were ignored me. I didn’t get the actual reason may be I was too odd for their thinking or they didn’t get my gags. Everyone had their own group as per their status; some were isolated but still acted like kings.

I was feeling all alone but mom always says to me  be positive & keep smiling so I was keep doing my efforts trying to fit in them. I made some friends!! Couldn’t call them actual friends but they gave me attention mainly because of my voice, they praised my singing but when they turned faces they acted like my rivals. I really wanted one good friend not rivals.

After some weeks I get bored, training was all good trainer always gave me good encouragement but I was feeling like lost in that big crowd. Other kids also looking at me like bug especially when our trainer praised me.

Slowly I was getting isolated from all of them; I was keeping little distance, just simple hi bye & some mannerism which was strictly followed by all though they didn’t like it. So in conclusion everything was going pretty boring except my training sessions.

One day I was doing my regular session & after completion of it I was just sitting at the corner watching all other kids.  After some time suddenly I saw one boy who seems different to me than the rest of the crowd there. Truthfully as per my perspective he was one of the handsome, cute boy out there tall, tiny face, straight nose, cute lips & really big beautiful eyes, from the distance also I could saw all his features.

After long observations I saw that boy  was trying to act like all brave & bold but my eyes never missed the nervousness in his eyes, actually  he was looking like a lost kid in that crowd.  I could feel that he was scared but I he was very good actor hiding it well from other kids but I’m Jinki he couldn’t hide it from me, so I decided to observe him more. I wanted to know more about him I didn’t know why but he made me curious.  The day I saw him, I felt some strange connection with him which was making me wonder about myself.

After some searching & conversation with my trainer I found that he was two years younger than me & his name was Minho...”hmmm nice name” I thought  in my mind, he was road casted & then came into audition & passed it quickly, It was interesting because so many of kids passed the audition after so many chance .

For me it was more interesting that he was not entered in this world as singer, dancer, musician or rapper, they casted him due to his looks as a beautiful visual. There was no doubt he was so handsome but I saw other visual based casted boys & girls too but they were more quickly adjusted to the atmosphere there, they all wanted to became idols & famous I could see it in their eyes but this kid was different  which was adding fire into my curiosity  .

 More I observed him more I got curious, I could  feel so much pressure on him, he was trying too hard to co-exist with all the kids there & the atmosphere around him but his each struggle was making me upset his nervous & lost face after every failed try was making my heart ache.

At some point I felt that he was so similar to me simple, cute & lost. So many times I found him alone isolated trying to keep his cool, dazed, silent.  Some time I saw him with different kids showing his fake smile & coolness which was making me anxious. I wanted to see his true nature & real smile not all that masked things.

One day I was wondering in building after training sessions, when I suddenly heard someone’s giggling voice. Very carefully I peered into a big hall from where that laugh was coming.

 I saw him watching football match at training hall alone on small television & first time I saw his cute & real smile, he was so into that match so he didn’t even get my presence. His innocence, cute smile was like shining star.  With each goal happened in match he was clapping his hands & shouting loudly with cute smile.  It was so beautiful & all I wanted to treasure it forever, there was no fake or awkward thing on his face. He was happy, genuinely happy his face was saying all things & automatically I was also smiling. It was so strange that his smile & happiness was making me happy.

 I wanted to see that boy like this in his all natural behaviour without any masked things, I wanted to make him smile, happy & fate gave me that chance by putting him into same group of mine ..... 

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pre-debut pics of Onew & Minho

Onew /Jinki                                                                                                  Minho