Jongdae used to believe in God.

 

 

 

 

When he was a very young child, his family fed him with the knowledge that a deity, God, our father, existed far away in the sky. They told him how merciful he is, how he loves all of his children and will always be by their side. The priests told him how God should be worshipped and at the centre of everyone’s lives. His friends marvelled how God had all the power in the world and could do anything. Little Jongdae believed all of them.

 

 

At the age of 11, Jongdae was more than happy to live the Christian life and strongly believed God loved him as much as he loved God.

 

 

At the age of 13, Jongdae realised he was not attracted to girls. The thought itself was very hard to comprehend for the young boy, what has he done wrong to deserve this? Will God be mad at him? Is it something that can be fixed?

 

 

He prayed and prayed to God for help.

 

 

At the age of 14/15, Jongdae admitted to himself that he’s attracted to guys. Every night since that moment, he made sure to ask God for his forgiveness and acceptance, promising to never act upon it and marry a woman to produce an offspring, like a good Christian.

 

 

At the age of 16 he was reassured by the knowledge that God loves everyone equally and decided to accept the way he was made.

 

 

At the age of 16 ½, Jongdae told his parents, got disowned, lived on the street for 3 months, and nearly died of starvation. He met his saviour, Zhang Yixing, on one fateful day and was taken in by his family. For a few months, Jongdae was allowed to live in the spacious house and experience what love feels like again. In that time, he found a job at the convenience store down the road and entered college with Yixing.

 

 

At the age of 17, he got a visit from his old priest, who told him about his sins.

 

Who assured him he'll burn in hell for all eternity.

 

 

At 18, he finished college and managed to get a scholarship at a university. He also bought himself an apartment, small but his own. He was able to let go of his past and move forward to the next stage.

 

 

 

 

Somewhere in between these events, Jongdae stopped believing in God.

 

 

 

 

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The dark smoke wouldn’t stop spreading.

 

 

It surrounded the looming buildings, devoured the vast majority of what should be in Jongdae’s sight and started suffocating him the moment his foot turned the corner. He coughed and waved his arm around to clear it away, but it was all in vain. With one hand lightly pressed against his nose and mouth, he continued to walk on the gravelly pavement.

 

 

Secretly, Jongdae hoped someone would call the firemen. The harsh truth was, no one would do anything about it, after all, it’s most likely they are burning drugs to get the whole district high or getting rid of corpses. It sure stank like the latter.

 

 

Jongdae never really wanted to know what a dead body smelled like while being set alight, but if you live in this area it’s the norm. Welcome to ‘District Red’, the place where bright neon lights are used instead of lamps, music blares from almost every building, be it a home, pub or club and murder is as common as singing in the shower.

 

 

Not everyone does it, but everyone accepts it.

 

 

District Red is the slums, where all the murderers, drug dealers, crime committers, sinners meet. Adults walk through here in groups of 20 and only if they have to. Anyone below 18 or who can’t fend for themselves is easy prey for the gangs or ‘sellers’.

 

 

It’s definitely not a nice place to be living in, but Jongdae can’t be fussy. Honestly, he’s just glad he managed to stay alive for this long.

 

 

Turning into a pitch black alleyway, the raven head managed to smartly avoid multiple gangs, those proud bastards, and take a short cut to his house. 'Two birds with one stone' he thought briefly.

 

 

Jongdae's apartment was near the very middle of District Red and he couldn’t have been more grateful. The love motels and thin walls were as legal as it gets here; it was the safest part in the area.

 

 

Once he reached the familiar door, he took about 5 seconds to be off the street and locking it from the inside. With a relieved sigh, Jongdae stepped into the only useable room, his living room/bedroom.

 

 

The atmosphere in it was suffocating. The lights were out, an electricity outage caused by who knows what. Then again, it’s not as if it’s ever really there. Jongdae’s learnt to deal with it the hard way - cold showers, stinking clothes, no warm food. It isn’t that bad, once you get used to it at least. But today felt different. The air in the room was just that little bit stuffier, the tomato soup a little bit colder and the clothes a tad bit dirtier.

 

 

‘I’ll have to go to Yixing’s.’ He muttered under his breath. Dropping his school bag in the corner and grabbing an apple from the dangerously slanted cupboard in the kitchen, he sat down and tried to focus on his plans for tomorrow.

 

 

The music next door wasn’t loud enough today. It was by far easier for Jongdae to concentrate with blaring music the screams of young women as they were pounded into by whoever was available. Or was it the other way around?...The selfish women where the ones who sold their bodies and the hungry, rich men offered their money?...Whichever one it was, the ending result was still the same; they would boast about how many es they managed to during the week and not let the apartment holders sleep for a long time, which as not appreciated. Well, unless someone’s into that stuff.

 

He sighed and dropped the small notebook back onto the floor, apple already finished and in the bin. Whatever he had to do tomorrow he can worry about then, for now he needed to sleep and forget about what happens next door and outside.

 

---------------------------------

 

‘Jongdae…..JONGDAE!’ Yixing screamed at his friend. They were sat in the formers house, surrounded by their  5 other friends. This was meant to be a study session, not a chew-Jongdae-out session but apparently everyone else had a different idea.

 

‘Are you even listening to what I’ve been saying?! You have to move out of there! It’s the most disgusting place in the whole town and I can’t stand my best friend living in constant danger the whole time!’ He yelled, fury bringing him close to tears.

 

 

Jongdae felt bad. He got used to living where he does and doesn’t particularly care to look for a more expensive home nearer the university. But if Yixing was the one living in District Red, he would flip just as much, for the same reasons, only they would be rightly placed.

 

 

‘Xing…oh ‘cmon don’t cry. It’s not that bad there, I’ve survived this long haven’t I? Trust me a bit.’ He tried to sooth.

 

 

Yixing wrung his hands together and shook his head, making a few tears spill from his eyes. At the miserable sight, Zitao started tearing up as well, making Yifan and Minseok reach over to both of them in an attempt at comfort.

 

 

‘You know I trust you…it’s just…I-I can’t stand the thought that I might see you one day and you’ll be gone the next. You’re a good person Jongdae, my and everyone’s here best friend. That place reeks of sin, Dae. The people there are lovers of pleasure, not God, they are slanderous, unforgiving and abusive. The Bible says, ‘Have nothing to do with such people.’’

 

 

Jongdae crossed his arms while leaning back to look at the ceiling, scoffing ‘I don’t give a about what your god says, Yixing. He’s bull, and we both know it.’

 

 

The one addressed looked up from the floor and glared at Jongdae ‘God is not bull. He’s the one who will save us from our sins and lead the way to the new paradise!’

 

 

‘I don’t believe in paradise, you can go and around praying to whatever delusion was made up for you, but don’t bring me into that.’

 

 

‘I’m just trying to save you!’ Yixing yelled, turning into a sobbing mess.

 

 

Before the situation could escalate any more than it already has, Minseok cut in ‘Look here Dae, even if not for religious reasons, you should get out of there ASAP. The next thing you know you might be framed for a murder you took no part in and get locked up. Just…just get out of there, if not for yourself, then for us.’

 

 

Jongdae ran a palm down his face. It was frustrating, and he’s definitely been too harsh on Xing, but they all know how religious antics will only piss him off. When will they learn ‘God’ is just a made up thing? At least Minseok had a valid, none religious point.

 

 

‘Sure, fine, I’ll consider it.’ He said quietly, not quite meeting anyone’s eyes.

 

 

With those words, Luhan gently shoved a bundle of paper into Jongdae’s arms. Under closer inspection, the bundle was revealed to be fliers showing apartments for sale, all pretty and posh and pretty expensive compared to the one he had now.

 

 

Silently, he shoved them into his bag along with textbooks that were spread out on the table and stood up.

 

 

Luhan saw him to the door and with a nod of approval, let him out of the house.

 

It never occurred to the 4 friends left in the house,  that the fliers would end up staying at the bottom of his bag, most likely never to be looked at again.

 

 

It also never occurred to them just how one white lie can change their whole view point of one person.

 

-----------------

 

The creak of the front door startled Jongdae out of his sleep induced state. Looking around, he managed to note it was 5:00a.m, and hour and a half before he needed to be out and on his way to uni.

 

 

Without any rush, he sat up. The man who entered the room was familiar – tall, lanky, burning red hair and a never fading smile on his face.

 

 

‘’Sup Chanyeol?’ He greeted and put on a lazy smile as a form pf greeting.

 

 

Upon being acknowledged, Chanyeol let himself in and closed the door with much less force than he possessed. With 3 strides he was sitting next to the shorter male on  the bed, looking as happy as always.

 

 

‘’d ya hear about yesterday? They killed 3 es down 5^th alley and burned them along with the murder weapons, clothes and a few kilograms of drugs.’

 

 

Not a surprising event. Not in their eyes at least.

 

 

‘And here I thought that only 30 bodies could make that amount of smoke.’

 

 

 

The red hair chuckled. He stretched his long arms out and laid back across Jongdae’s legs, looking at the ceiling.

 

 

‘They seemed to have made a show of it, oh so many people got high it was unbelievable. Wouldn’t be surprised if a few jumped into the fire for s and giggles and ended up dead along with the murdered 3. At least they weren’t associated with me in any way.’ He said. Jongdae smirked.

 

 

‘What, the es or thugs?’ Chanyeol let out an animated gasp and put a hand to his chest, as if shot by a bullet. He was shot, once, but that is a long story for another day.

 

 

‘I own a strip club kitten, not a ion ‘parlour’, as the owners call it. As for the thugs, I’m no more likely to know them than you are.’

 

 

‘So it’s VIXX again huh?’

 

 

‘Biinnngoooo’

 

 

‘Jeez, if they are stupid enough to keep on doing that then they’ll be caught in no time.’

 

 

‘That would be kind of shame, wouldn’t it?’

 

 

They sat in silence for a few seconds, thinking the situation through. No matter how horrendously VIXX acted, they were still the two’s friends. They were the ones to look out for Jongdae during his early times in District Red and the current no.1 gang.

 

 

Jongdae decided to break the tense silence.

 

 

 

“Oy Chan, drop me off at uni will ya?’ He nudged his friend off the bed and stood up himself to head to the cold shower.

 

 

It seemed to work, as Chanyeol’s smile returned in an instant ‘Nah mate, can’t today. I’ll send Baek your way though, he’s in a good mood and ’s been whining about not seeing you for so long.’ He chuckled at his boyfriends antics, but heaved himself off the floor none the less. ’20 minutes.’ He said to Dae who waved at him and just like that, Chanyeol disappeared into the cold morning.

 

 

20 minutes later, a ‘Hoot Hoot motherer! Get in the car!’ was heard and Jongdae literally jumped out of his house and into the roofless vehicle.  The two friends drove down the main road; laughing at everything and anything.

 

 

‘You know Dae?’ Baek yelled over the whooshing sound of air separating around them ‘You are practically the most innocent of all the people in District Red!’

 

 

‘Hahaha, I can’t deny that.’

 

 

‘Hey Baek, d’you believe in god?’

 

‘Yeah; like I the bible is nonsense and church is , but there’s most definitely a God out there.’

 

 

‘Fair enough.’ Jongdae replied, laughing lightly into the air.

 

 

‘Have nothing to do with such people.’ Rang in his ears and Jongdae could only laugh louder.

 

-----------------------------

 

In class, Yixing nearly deafened him due to the long rambles how he was worried and how much he and his family prayed for Jongdae to be safe.

 

 

The dark haired boy appreciated the thought and thanked his friend for all those words. Such a shame they were being wasted on a none existing deity.

 

 

‘Thanks Yixing, for caring.’

 

 

With a tired sigh Yixing looked at Jongdae and hugged him tightly. ‘You know I care more about you than I care about myself don’t you?’ He muttered into Jongdae’s shirt.

 

 

‘I know and I’m so sorry to make you worried all the time.’

 

 

He really was sorry.

 

 

After the wordless apology, the two resumed walking, and Yixing made a comment that would stick with them until the rest of their lives. It was a comment Jongdae was very familiar with, dating back to his childhood.

 

 

‘I can’t believe the world has come to this Dae, it’s just like it says in Timothy 3:1 – 5

 

“But mark this: There will be terrible times in the last days.  People will be lovers of themselves, lovers of money, boastful, proud, abusive, disobedient to their parents, ungrateful, unholy, without love, unforgiving, slanderous, without self-control, brutal, not lovers of the good, treacherous, rash, conceited, lovers of pleasure rather than lovers of God—  having a form of godliness but denying its power. Have nothing to do with such people.”’

 

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A/N: I hope you liked the first chapter! If you see any blaring mistakes please do tell me and I’ll fix them!

 

Depending on what the character thinks of God is if it’s capitalized or not – capitalized they believe in God and lower case is they don’t. Same goes for the Bible.

 

Have a lovely day!