Minhyuk awkwardly walks back and forth their dorm’s living room even if it’s cramped, as usual, because it’s supposed to be Hyungwon’s turn to clean the room that week but he reasoned he was too tired after practicing for their year-end performances to actually start cleaning.

He’s awkwardly holding his phone with his right hand while using his other hand to hold the coffee he got on his way back to the dorms, patiently waiting for any response from their leader who still isn’t back from the company. It’s been an hour since he sent a message asking where he was, or when the hell would he be going home because even if Minhyuk’s not as motherly as Kihyun or as worrisome as Hoseok, it still concerns him not seeing four people inside the room beside his and the maknaes’ room.

(And maybe because Hyunwoo promised him they’ll be eating dinner together to make up for the leader not treating them out during their Hong Kong trip.)

(Or maybe also because he’s just genuinely worried for Hyunwoo, like how he’s been for the past few months.)

He doesn’t know when, how, where, or why it happened, but one day, as he woke up earlier than the other members to prepare for their schedule, he saw their leader quietly staring out in the windowpane of their dorm and Minhyuk gulps because it doesn’t look right anymore; how he’s silently staring at the boy who used to reprimand him for his childish ways during broadcasts and suddenly wishing he was by his side, sharing warmth with him as he probably keeps up with the leader’s usual quiet demeanor. It’s frightening at first, seeing him in a different way. But as days passed, the feeling grew even larger than before, taking its toll when he almost cornered Hyunwoo after practice for no reason at all.

It took him an overly-excited pitchy voice calling Kihyun over to walk with him back to the dorms to stop himself from doing something that could probably change the dynamics of their friendship.

Minhyuk then finds himself growing more and more worried as minutes pass by without any text from Hyunwoo, pondering if he should go get his coat and trudge back to the company to pull him back home to rest, but his phone vibrates all of a sudden and it almost slips from his grasp if it weren’t for his fast reflexes.

The ‘new message’ notification is above Hyunwoo’s name and Minhyuk clicks it open.

“Wait for me to come home.”

Wait. Yeah. That’s what Minhyuk’s been doing ever since. Wait for his debut, wait for his co-members to get ready every morning, wait for his fanletters to come every month, and wait for this person who seem to just never get a hint.

He just keeps on waiting and waiting every single day and he wonders what it actually means to wait.

Does waiting mean you also let yourself get hurt a bit when you see them smiling with other people? Does waiting mean you just let the one you love go on for the whole day without even noticing you were there beside him the whole time? Does waiting actually mean waiting for him to notice you’ve had these feelings for quite a while already?

Does waiting have to hurt so much until it’s unbearable already?

He slowly sinks down on the cold wooden floor of the living room, thoughts slowly consuming him as he desperately tries to think of any good reason why it’s still worth it to wait. There are no mixed signals anyway, just one heart that’s always hoping for something more than what they currently are.

Hyunwoo waits for him outside the van so they sit together, Hyunwoo’s always the first one to give him the bottle of water after those unending hours of practice until the sun slowly peeks out from behind the shut windows, Hyunwoo’s always looking out for him during performances and schedules, making sure to hold onto the hem of his shirt once in a while because he knows Minhyuk has a tendency to go overboard most of the time.

Minhyuk concludes he’s been over-analyzing everything; that maybe Hyunwoo’s like this to all the members as well. He looks out for the youngest members all the time, he’s also genuinely concerned with the members’ health, and he offers everyone a bottle of water during practice hours.

Minhyuk is nothing special to Hyunwoo.

He doesn’t realize he’s too deep in thought to hear the door of their dorm creaking open to reveal the sweating Hyunwoo who looked like he just ran a marathon before heading back home. Hyunwoo tiptoes to the living room, sneaking behind the wall separating it from the doorstep, and he silently peeks to stare at Minhyuk’s spaced out expression which he finds really cute at times. (He doesn’t tell anyone that.)

Minhyuk’s in the middle of remembering those times when he felt special enough with Hyunwoo when suddenly, a pair of sweaty arms wrap around his waist and hoists him upwards. He almost screams in fear before realizing who it is after seeing the bracelet this guy once wore during one of their music video shootings.

“I waited for you because you told me we’d be getting food. Did you bring some home?” Minhyuk’s voice isn’t wavering at all and he’s mentally sighing because he’s actually nervous feeling the warmth on his back that’s too unfamiliar for him.

Hyunwoo isn’t letting go at all and it’s weird because they’re in the middle of the living room and Minhyuk is awkwardly standing with Hyunwoo back hugging him from behind. Their chests rise and sink at the same time and he doesn’t know if it’s him or the leader who’s trying to sync it together. He wonders if their hearts would ever be in sync as well.

They stay silent for a while, with Minhyuk staring at the pile of crumpled paper scattered around the computer desk where Changkyun previously stayed on while writing new lyrics that Jooheon asked him to finish before the week ends. Hyunwoo doesn’t let go and for the nth time, it’s driving Minhyuk crazy because Hyunwoo isn’t the touchy-feely type like Hoseok but he doesn’t look like he has plans on letting Minhyuk escape his arms.

“Uh,” Minhyuk knows he needs to get out his grasp now or else he might never want to leave his arms again because it feels like home in a lot of ways, “what are you doing?”

“You waited for me.”

Hyunwoo’s voice is deep and Minhyuk can feel the vibrating sensation on his back but he brushes the feeling off, thinking of it as chills from the AC that’s on full blast. “Of course I will, hyung. You did text me to wait.”

It’s silent again and it feels like hours for Minhyuk. Hyunwoo now has his head on his shoulder and Minhyuk has his fists balled on his side, stopping himself from turning around and facing Hyunwoo properly. “Can we go to sleep n-“

“Stay with me.”

This is the exact mixed signal Minhyuk fears of hearing because he knows it’ll be just giving him false hopes. It for him because he knows those soaring hopes will soon be shot down by the reality that Hyunwoo might just really be too tired to walk back to their rooms so he’s using Minhyuk as his pillow and bed.

Minhyuk nods. He doesn’t know what to answer or what to say anymore. He’s afraid of saying anything that might just ruin the moment but Hyunwoo’s making it hard for him yet again.

“Please stay with me, Minhyuk. And wait for me.”

Ah.

Minhyuk rests his hands atop Hyunwoo’s larger ones and he holds them properly before pulling them away, but Hyunwoo’s using force to stop him from doing so and they end up back to their original position.

“Don’t push me away.”

His voice is sounds so tired already and Minhyuk remembers the schedule they have the next morning. “We still have rehearsals tomorrow. Let’s head to bed now, hyung.”

“Minhyuk.”

Minhyuk’s heart skips a beat.

“I appreciate you so much but I was never vocal about it. Now that I have the chance to say it aloud, I just want to thank you for always being there.”

The blond smiles. “No problem. Members look out for each other, right?”

“Thank you for staying with me, and waiting for me, and just being there with me all the time.” Hyunwoo lets go of him and Minhyuk finally turns around to see the leader’s eyes already closed as he’s speaking. “But please wait for me a little longer, okay?”

Minhyuk grabs his arm and he guides Hyunwoo towards his shared room with the members, wondering if he’s already sleep talking or just babbling nonsense again. But the warmth is back, this time around his wrist, because Hyunwoo stops him from leaving after dropping the leader off to the door of his room.

“Just wait for me, please.”

Minhyuk nods even if Hyunwoo doesn’t see it and he hurriedly walks back to his room, shutting it close as silent as he can to not startle the two youngest members already dozing off in their beds. He reminds himself to clean the pile of paper on their floor the next morning before going out for breakfast with the rest of the group.

He doesn’t sleep that night, and wonders what it really means to wait, what it actually means to wait, and if this waiting for Hyunwoo is worth it.