KYESIN

 

“Please take the messages I’ll get. I have to go to an appointment for the rest of the day,” I told my assistant. “You can go home once you’re done with your reports.”

 

“Yes, ma’am,” she nodded. “See you tomorrow.”

 

“See you.”

 

I went down to the parking lot with my laptop and went inside my car. I revved the engine on. I took out my phone and called Dean before leaving.

 

“Hey hun,” he greeted.

 

“Hey Dean. I’ll be going to that appointment now,” I said.

 

“Oh. Okay. Take care, honey. Please call me when you get back,” he said.

 

“I will.”

 

“Alright. We have a dinner reservation at nine, so please be back by then.”

 

“Yes, I will. Don’t worry.”

 

“Don’t have too much fun, okay?” he joked.

 

I laughed. “Yes, sir.”

 

I ended the call and drove away. A few days ago, Kyuhyun contacted my firm asking to schedule an appointment with me for this day and this day only, saying that he doesn’t have any other free time due to schedules. I had to cancel my meetings and appointments to make room for him, not because it was Kyuhyun but because I didn’t want to disappoint his mother, whom I have personally told that I would handle their business’ data.

 

He asked me to go to a parking lot building somewhere in Seoul. He even has specified a certain floor and lot number for me to park in, and so I did as he instructed. I arrived there in time.

 

Kyuhyun was already there, waiting for me, leaning on his black Mercedes parked beside my car. He smiled wide as he saw me arrive. I knew, after all, why he has specifically picked this date to see me. It was because today is my birthday.

 

“Good afternoon,” Kyuhyun greeted as I went out of my car. “I’ll take that.” He took my laptop bag from me and loaded it into his car. “Have you eaten?”

 

“Yes I have, thank you. Are we riding together?” I asked.

 

“Yes, it’ll be easier that way.” he replied.

 

“Are we going somewhere far?” I asked.

 

“Yeah, a little,” he replied. He opened the passenger door for me and let me in. He quickly walked to his side, got in and drove off.

 

We drove for hours, definitely away from the city and into the provincial side of Korea. We drove along the highway where all you can see are vast green mountain ranges. It was a pretty long drive, but it was especially nice because all the while Kyuhyun was singing along to whatever song was on the radio.

 

“You seem happy,” Kyuhyun said, slowly glancing at me once in awhile.

 

“Hmm..” I nodded. “It’s been awhile since I’ve heard you sing live.”

 

“Live?” he asked.

 

“Yeah, in person,” I chuckled.

 

“So you’ve listened to my songs?” he asked.

 

“Of course. I’ve always looked forward to you and your group’s releases,” I replied.

 

“Hmm… Seven years must be long,” he said.

 

“Seven? Hmm.. how long is it really? Four? Five?” I said. “But it was indeed very long.”

 

Kyuhyun furrowed his brows and took some time to think. “SMTOWN in LA?”

 

“Yeah,” I nodded.

 

“i knew it was you I saw! The hyungs didn’t believe me, called me crazy and told me I was just seeing things I wanted to see… Especially then because we were in America.”

 

“You were really good then… But hearing you now… You’re so much better.”

 

“Am I?” he chuckled.

 

“Mhm,” I said. “Your control is so much better now. Your runs are clearer and you have better chest power.”

 

“You’ve really followed my career, haven’t you,” he said.

 

“Of course. You will always be my favorite singer,” I said.

 

“You really did love me that much, huh? You still supported me when I couldn’t even look at you,” he whispered.

 

“Kyuhyun, I already forgave you for that. Let’s not talk about it anymore.”

 

He sighed. “You’re still too kind. You should be mad at me for things like that. You never get mad at me…”

 

I looked at him. “I don’t think I am capable of that.”

 

He sighed. “Fine, you’re right. Let’s not talk about it anymore. But I want you to know that I want things between us to be better from now on. I won’t hurt you anymore, I promise. And I’m keeping my word with that boyfriend of yours. As much as I want to kiss you, I won’t. Not unless you tell me to, or you kiss me yourself. This is how serious I am when I say I want you back, Kyesin. I will do everything I can to set things right. Starting now.”

 

“Kyuhyun…”

 

“You don’t need to say anything,” he said.

 

“I was just going to ask you how much further are we going to drive,” I joked.

 

He chuckled. “Well, just fifteen more minutes from now. Please, just wait a little more. I promise it’ll be worth it.”

 

“We’re not going to work on your business, are we?” I asked.

 

He pursed his lips, fighting a smile. “No.”

 

“I knew it! So where are you taking me? When are we going to do it? I don’t want to let your mother down!” I said.

 

“Relax. Do it whenever you want to. I don’t need to watch you. I already know you’re doing it for eomma and not me, after hearing her rave about you the other day, so I know I could trust you,” he said.

 

“Rave about me?” I laughed.

 

“You know how eomma is. She loves you like her own daughter. She’s really happy you came back, by the way. She says she’s going to call you up whenever she feels like it,” Kyuhyun said.

 

“She does, actually,” I nodded.

 

“She’s thankful that you’re the one handling our data, as well,” he said. “I know you’d do anything for her so I’ll let you do it on your own.”

 

“Then why do you have to make this lame excuse that we’ll be working on your business?”

 

“Would you have agreed to come with me if I had told you otherwise?” He asked. He has a point. “I… I had this day off.. And I do not want to spend it with anyone else but you… It’s pretty selfish, isn’t it? But I’m going to prove you that I’m the same Kyuhyun you know before, and I will take any opportunity that arises.”

 

I sighed and then chuckled. “You’re incredibly persistent.”

 

“That’s just a nice word for stubborn,” he laughed. He then parked the car in the middle of nowhere, somewhere up a hill.

 

“What are we doing here?” I asked.

 

“You’ll see,” he replied. “Come on. We still have to trail up a little.”

 

“Trail up? We’re going to hike?” I asked as I went out the car.

 

“Yeah,” he replied, taking something out of the trunk.

 

“You could’ve just told me, you know. I could’ve changed my shoes...”

 

Kyuhyun walked towards me with a box in his hands. “That’s why I bought you these. Sit in the car. I’ll help you put them on.”

 

I did as he said. Kyuhyun took out a pair of cute flat boots and put them on me, tying the laces. It reminded me of when he helped me put on my skates when we first met.

 

“They’re really pretty,” I whispered. “Whose are they?”

 

“It’s yours now,” he replied. “I can give you shoes, just for now... since we’re not together… yet.” He grinned.

 

“Mine?”

 

He held out his hand to help me stand up. He nodded. “Happy birthday,” he greeted with twinkling eyes.

 

My heart jumped out of my rib cage. I haven’t felt this way in such a long time. My cheeks were burning. “Thank you…” I whispered. “You remembered…” Pull yourself together, Park Kyesin.

 

“Of course. I could never forget,” he said. Kyuhyun closed the door of his car and locked it. He pointed up the hill where a small house stood. “Let’s go there,” he said.

 

“There? We can’t just go to other people’s houses, Kyu,” I said.

 

He started walking, following a trail up the house. “I’m feeling a wee bit adventurous today, Kye. Isn’t it a beautiful day?”

 

It was beautiful. The sky is clear but it wasn’t hot. The late winter and early spring breeze kept it nice and cool. “It is, Kyuhyun, but we might be charged with trespassing with what we’re about to do.”

 

He laughed. “Relax. I’m sure they’ll be friendly.” He smiled to himself as if enjoying an inside joke.

 

We hiked up the hill while Kyuhyun sang happily. His voice really blends well with nature as if birds were singing along with him. He was patient with me, helping me go up steep slopes. I admit. I was excited too. I didn’t experience anything like this when I was away for seven years. I was slowly becoming myself again - a little girl filled with adventure.

 

We reached the top of the hill in a few minutes and the hike was worth it. The house was white and simple outside. It was big in the sense that it was wide rather than high. It looked very peaceful, away from the city and hidden in the woods.

 

“Oh hey, it’s open,” Kyuhyun said.

 

“Is there anyone inside?”

 

“I don’t think so…” He hold my hand and pulled me inside. “Hello?” Kyuhyun called but no one answered.

 

The inside of the house is warm and welcoming. Most of the furnitures were made of pretty sculpted wood. The carpet on the living room floor looks beautiful and expensive. A warm sense of home washed through me.

 

“I wonder who owns the place… Do they just leave it open all the time? It doesn’t look like the house is used often though,” I said.

 

Kyuhyun smiled at me. “Don’t you know who owns it?”

 

I shook my head. “Don’t tell me… Is this house yours?!”

 

He guffawed. “No,” he said taking my hand back in his. “Would you like to meet the owner? She’s very beautiful.”

 

“So you do know who lives here!” I said.

 

“Come with me.” He brought me to the other side of the living room and made me stand in front of the mirror. “There.”

 

“What? I don’t understand,” I said.

 

“That beautiful woman with hazel eyes in front of you is the owner,” he smiled.

 

I look at Kyuhyun. “This… This is mine?”

 

“Mhm…” He smiled, tucking a lock of hair behind my ear. “Follow me.”

 

He took my hand again and pulled me into a corridor. At the end was a giant oil painting. I gasped as soon as I recognized it. It was a painting of my family - my biological family. The same painting found at our estate in Italy.

 

“This… This is unbelievable!”

 

“This isn’t even the best part,” he smiled wide. He laced his fingers with mine and pulled me to the back of the house. There was a grass archway perfectly shaped that led to another surprise.

 

There were fields and fields of grapes planted on the hill. “Oh wow…” I breathed, amazed by this beautiful paradise. “How-how did you find this?” I asked.

 

He held my hand tight as we went further down the hill to explore the vineyard. “When you left… I was lost… Then a few months after, I was driving around in my motorcycle to clear my mind. To be honest, I didn’t know where I was going and I literally got lost. I saw this house and so I decided to ask for directions from the people who lived here. I then found out that it was yours.”

 

He sat on the ground where an amazing view of the whole vineyard can be seen. I sat down with him, enjoying the view. “It’s beautiful, Kyuhyun. It’s smaller than the one we have in Italy, but it’s just as beautiful…”

 

“It’s sad you had to see it during winter,” he chuckled. “You should go back during harvest. It’s much more beautiful then.”

 

I looked at him. “These boots aren’t your birthday gift, are they?”

 

He chuckled, looking down at his hands. “No…” he muttered.

 

“Well then, thank you. So much. I love it,” I told him.

 

“Do you really?” he asked.

 

I nodded. “Kyuhyun, I’ve been searching for this vineyard for years. I knew we had one here, but I didn’t know where exactly it was. Thank you for finding it for me. Really.”

 

“Kye… I’m serious about getting you back, Kye. I’m going to do everything just to have you again,” he said as he looked me in my eyes.

 

“Okay, let’s say you get me back. Do you think we’ll be the same again as before? Do you think we’ll work out again?” I asked.

 

“We don’t have to be like before, Kye. We can start over and be whatever we want to be,” he said.

 

“Do you think that that’s possible?”

 

“You still love me, don’t you?” He smirked. “As long as you do, I won’t lose hope.” He placed his head on top of mine and leaned on me. I’ve forgotten how much I liked it when he does this.

 

I put my hand up to reach for his head, ruffling his hair like how I would always do in response. My heart feels so warm now that I’m with him. I know what he’s doing. He’s reminding me of the things we used to do...things that I love doing with him…

 

“I miss you…” He whispered as his hand crawled to lace his fingers with mine. “I miss your touch… I miss your voice… I miss looking into your eyes… Your beautiful hazel eyes… I wish I could take it all back. I wish I could erase everything wrong I’ve done…”

 

“I miss you too, Kyuhyun… But I don’t want to cry on my birthday,” I chuckled.

 

“Alright,” he nodded. He brushed my hair with his hand while looking into my eyes. “I promise to treat you a lot better from now on, Kye. I’ll show you how much I love you.”

 

My heart couldn’t calm down. It was beating so fast that I could barely hear myself think. I wanted to hold him. Unconsciously, I was moving in and leaning closer. Kyuhyun’s soft eyes and plump lips were inviting me in.

 

“Mister Cho!!” A husky voice suddenly called from behind.

 

I ducked my head down. What was I doing?

 

Kyuhyun lifted my head up with his finger and smiled at me. He stood up and helped me up.

 

“Ahjussi!” Kyuhyun greeted the man with a big smile.

 

“Oh! You should’ve told me you’ll be coming. I could’ve prepared something for you and your beautiful friend,” the man replied. “We’re quite busy with the crops now. We have to put layers of soil to keep the roots warm, so I’m sorry for the mess.”

 

“Oh, ahjussi, I’d like you to meet a special person,” Kyuhyun said. He put his hand on my back and pushed me gently up front. “This is Park Kyesin.”

 

“Park Kyesin? The Park Kyesin?!”

 

“Yes,” Kyuhyun smiled wide.

 

“Omo!” The man bowed low. “It is an honor to finally meet you Miss Park!”

 

“It’s nice to meet you too, but please, you do not have to bow that low.”

 

“Kye, Lee Daejoong ahjussi is the keeper here in the vineyard. He’s been taking care of the place for almost thirty years,” Kyuhyun explained.

 

“Oh, thank you for your service, ahjussi,” I said gratefully.

 

“Anything for your family, Miss Park. But Please, come in. It’s getting dark and there are a lot of insects outside this time of day. I’ll prepare dinner for you both,” he said.

 

“I’ll go help you, ahjussi,” I said.

 

“Oh no need! I’ll handle it,” he said.

 

“Please, it will be my pleasure to help you,” I insist.

 

“Ahjussi, please do accept her offer. She will find a way to help you even if you say no,” Kyuhyun chuckled.

 

“Alright,” he nodded. “It will be faster this way anyway. Oh by the way, these are my three sons. They help me in the vineyard when they get home from school.”

 

The three boys, the oldest was a few years older than Kyuhyun and the youngest was just the same age as I am, bowed in front of me in respect. “Thank you for helping your father,” I said.

 

“You can start putting the soil up now,” ahjussi instructed.

 

“I’ll go help!” kyuhyun announced.

 

“Kyu~” I couldn’t help but be worried.

 

“I’ll be fine, don’t worry,” he grinned. “Enjoy cooking!”

 

I went to the kitchen with Lee ahjussi and met his wife, Lee Youngja. She was very cheerful.

 

“We owe a lot to your father,” Lee ahjussi told me. “I did something terrible before… I stole something from your father’s house here… I was desperate then. Our eldest son was sick and we didn’t have any money to bring him to a doctor and buy his medicine. But I was caught… Your father, kind as he is, didn’t press charges and even helped me get our son the things he needs. In exchange, he asked me to work here...in the vineyard. He asked me to work temporarily til he finds someone who can do the job. But since we felt so grateful to him, we decided to stay and work here. He could’ve put me to jail and my family could’ve suffered… But he sees the good in people. Mister Cho tells me you’re the same.”

 

I smiled as I sliced the vegetables. “How do you live by? I’m sorry for not finding you soon enough. I never knew where our vineyard in korea was.”

 

“When Mr Park left for Italy, he left money in a bank account for us to use. We only take what we need,” he said.

 

“And you still have money left to this day?” I asked.

 

“Yes,” he smiled. “The profits of the vineyard also go there so we never ran out.”

 

I nodded. “That’s good to know.”

 

“Mister Cho also comes by often and helps us in any way he can,” he said.

 

“He does?”

 

“Yes. Often times he would come and take us out to eat in a fancy restaurant with very delicious food. Sometimes, he would bring food here too. He also helps out a lot in labor. He cares about the vineyard, Miss Park. He cares about it a lot. He sees to it that the crops are healthy for harvest. He comes here whenever he’s free. Because of people like your family and Mr. Cho, we never felt greedy,” he said with a big smile.

 

“I didn’t know that…” I said.

 

“When we first met Mister Cho, he said that the owner is a special person to him. We always thought that that was the reason why he likes helping out. I don’t need to pry, and you may choose not to answer, but are you two…?”

 

“Oh! No,” I shook my head. “I have someone else I’m seeing.”

 

“Oh… I see. I’m sorry for asking. You just seem to be very special to Mister Cho. I see him staring at your family portrait down the corridor before he leaves every time that he’s here.”

 

“I see…”

 

“Is he a close friend of yours?” he asked.

 

“He was… but we grew apart when I left for America. I think he’s trying to bring us back the way we were,” I said.

 

“To me, I think he’s trying to win you over,” he smiled wide.

 

I felt my cheeks burn. “I… I don’t think so,” I replied.

 

“Mhm… Why would he even bother helping out all these years if he doesn’t care about you?” He said. “Mister Cho is a good guy, Miss Park. If it’s possible, I think you should give him a chance.”

 

“Yah. stop pushing our dear Miss Park to Mister Cho. If they’re meant to be, then they’re meant to be,” his wife said.

 

I had to chuckle. “Ani, ahjumma. It’s fine.”

 

“He must be bothering you. Why don’t you just go and relax at the living room?” she said.

 

“No, please, let me help. I’ve been away for years and I think it’s only proper that I offer a hand. Besides, I still owe you for not visiting the place ever,” I replied.

 

Ahjussi laughed. “Ahh… Mr. Cho is right…”

 

“About what?” I asked.

 

“You are as kind as your father, maybe even more,” he smiled.

 

“Does… Kyuhyun… Talk about me?” I asked.

 

The couple both grinned wide. “All the time, dear,” ahjumma answered.

 

“He does, every time he’s here. He’s told us great things about you,” ahjussi said.

 

“We felt then how much he misses you and…”

 

“And?” I asked.

 

The couple looked briefly at each other. “How much he loves you.” They answered together.

 

KYUHYUN

 

I patted down the soil on the ground. It was already dark but I didn’t mind. Taking care of this vineyard makes me happy. Somehow… in all those years Kyesin was gone, this vineyard seem to be where I showered my love for her.

 

Confused? So was I. When I’m not in this vineyard, just thinking of her then would piss me off. But when I’m here, everything just miraculously goes away. I treated this vineyard like how I should’ve treated her.

 

“May I help?” I suddenly hear a sweet voice coming from the house. I peeked and saw Kyesin standing near the mountain of soil we’re supposed to spread.

 

“Miss Park, it’s dark. Please go back inside,” the eldest son said.

 

“But they wouldn’t let me help inside, either. Please? I’m a fast learner,” she pleaded.

 

“Alright. There are gloves inside the shed. You can borrow eomma’s work clothes.”

 

“What are you doing here? You’ll get bitten by insects,” I told her as she knelt down to put soil on the ground.

 

“I have to take care of this vineyard. And there are no insects out in winter,” she answered.

 

I laughed. She could be so stubborn sometimes. “You’ll get sick. It’s getting really cold. Go on and wait inside.”

 

“And you won’t?” She asked me.

 

I smiled at her. “I do this all the time, Kye. I’m used to it already.”

 

She pouted. “I don’t get you at all. Why would you take care of this place? It’s not your responsibility.”

 

I sighed. “You’re right. It’s not mine. I had a selfish motive at first… I wanted to care of it so that when you come back, I could show this beautiful place to you and proudly say that I’ve worked hard on it, and then you’d be back together with me.”

 

“That’s what you’re doing now,” she said.

 

I chuckled. “Well yes… Kinda. But when the first harvest came...the place looked stunning. Healthy grapes in baskets and baskets… It was very healing. So I put my first motive aside and replaced it with a new one. I now wanted to care of it and make it more beautiful. I want these grapes to produce extraordinary wines that I could drink and proudly say that I’ve worked hard for. This vineyard undeniably reminds me of you… So when you left, I was lost and i didn’t know what to do with the love I used to give you. I found out what to do with it when I found this place.”

 

She breathed deeply and smiled at me. “I want to hug you now but I’m quite dirty. In any case, thank you. Thank you so much… For taking care of it for me. I thought I would never find this place, but I’m very happy now that I know where it is.”

 

“Will you come here more often?” I asked.

 

“For sure,” she nodded. “It reminds me of a lot of things Kyuhyun, just like how it reminds you of me.”

 

“It reminds you of your family,” I whispered.

 

“Yes,” she smiled a bittersweet smile. “It reminds me of them, of Italy…”

 

“Of home?”

 

She shook her head. “Home is wherever you feel at peace and comfort. It doesn’t matter if you live in an extravagant mansion, or just a simple makeshift house. When we were still together, I thought my home was always with you.”

 

“If you would let me, I’d like to make that happen again,” I told her.

 

She smiled at me. “Kyuhyun, I’ve already chosen Dean.”

 

I breathed deeply. “Does he feel like home to you?”

 

She bit her lip. “He will. Eventually.”

 

“How about me? Do I still feel like home to you?” I asked.

 

Her hazel eyes stared at mine for seconds. I knew she was pondering about her answer. She breathed. “That’s a secret.”

 

There was suddenly a bright flash from the sky and it roared, echoing off in the fields. I look up. Water droplets fell on my face. “Kye, get inside. It’s raining,” I said.

 

“How about you?” she asked.

 

“I’ll follow,” I smiled. “Go, it’s getting worse.”

 

“I’ll wait for you,” she told me.

 

I sighed. I stood up, leaving my work behind. I took my gloves off and held her by her hand, pulling her inside the shed. “Why do you always have to be so stubborn?”

 

She laughed at me as we both took off our work clothes. “It’s called being considerate, Kyuhyun.”

 

I watched her as she washed her hands. “Are you like this with Dean too?” I whispered.

 

She looked at me. “Yeah, of course.”

 

“And how does he handle it?”

 

“Dean is a very patient guy. But he… he’s not like you, Kyuhyun. He doesn’t have a temper… He’s so... nice. I mean, you’re nice too… but Dean, he’s another story,” she told me.

 

“You must be lucky then, huh,” I chuckled bitterly.

 

“He’s too nice, Kyuhyun. Too nice. Sometimes I wish he isn’t.”

 

“I don’t think he’s too nice,” I said.

 

She laughed. “Of course you wouldn’t.”

 

“That’s not what I meant…” I said as we walked back in the house. “You may not notice it but he is nothing compared to you. You’re my definition of too kind. And please, take that as a compliment.”

 

She nodded. “I will.”

 

“Oh! Just in time you two! Dinner is ready,” ahjussi welcomed us in.

 

“Thank you so much for preparing food for us, ahjussi,” i said.

 

“Oh, it’s really nothing! It’s the least we could do,” he replied.

 

I pulled out a chair for Kyesin and then sat beside her. “This looks delicious,” she said. It really does. Fried chicken and fresh buttered vegetables.

 

“We’re sorry it’s just very simple,” ahjumma said,

 

“No, no, it’s great, ahjumma. Thank you,” kye said.

 

“She isn’t a picky eater,” I chuckled as I explained.

 

“Ah well then, I’ll just leave you two alone now,” ahjumma and ahjussi bowed before walking away.

 

“Wait, won’t you join us?” Kyesin asked,

 

“Miss Park, go eat ahead. We still have work to finish,” ahjumma said.

 

“But--”

 

“Kye, let them be,” I said, squeezing her hand. “They just want to give us some privacy.”

 

“Oh…”

 

“See? You are my definition of too nice.”

 

“Right,” she laughed.

 

I took a plate. “Chicken?” I offered.

 

“Yes please. Thank you.” I put a slice on her plate and served her vegetables too.

 

She immediately dug in after saying a silent prayer, with her cheeks full of food. She looked really really cute.

 

I stood up from my seat and went to the wooden cabinet. I took a bottle of wine and the bottle opener and went back to the table.

 

“Is that the product of the vineyard?” She asked.

 

“Yes,” I answered with a smile.

 

“Wow! The ones you harvested?”

 

“No,” I chuckled. “You have to wait four more years for those.”

 

“Oh…” She swirled her glass, watching the wine spin inside like a whirlpool. She took the glass and placed it by her nose, smelled it before smiling. She took a sip. She had the same expression as I had when I first had the wine.

 

“It’s good, isn’t it?” I smiled.

 

She smiled back at me. “How much does this cost?”

 

“Around 15,000 won,” I replied.

 

“It’s excellent for its price,” she said.

 

“It is,” I agreed.

 

“Do they sell these in supermarkets?”

 

“I’ve only seen a few that carry this,” I said. “Most are sold in the area, and only a few are distributed to the city. Restaurants nearby all serve this wine. The vineyard is a little small compared to big companies’ so only a few bottles are produced a year.”

 

She pouted. “I’m gonna distribute these in big supermarkets to increase sales… Then, I’m gonna buy the land next to this place to expand.”

 

I laughed. “If that’s the case, you’ll need more people to work on the vineyard.”

 

“I have you,” she replied. “I’ll work on it too on my free time. Maybe I could ask help from Dean too…”

 

I bit my lip upon hearing that guy’s name. I never felt this before - this pain of hearing someone else’s name come out of your love’s mouth. I took a deep breath before looking at her again.

 

“I’m sorry…” she whispered.

 

I sighed and tried to give her my best smile. I slowly crept to put her hand in mine. “Can you… Can you not say his name… when I’m around? Please? Just try not to…”

 

“I’m sorry, Kyuhyun,” she said. “But I already told you, I chose him. Isn’t it hard for you to be around me? Why are you doing this to yourself?”

 

“Because I love you. I mean it,” I said. “I know you still care for me, otherwise you wouldn’t come with me here, and apologize for saying the guy’s name… So as long as you still have even an ounce of love for me, I’ll be waiting. I’ll prove it to you that I am still the man you fell in love with.”

 

She sighed and looked outside. “I think we should go back now. The weather’s not looking nice. I also have plans with… with someone.”

 

I sighed, squeezing her hand. “Okay…” I stood up and started clearing the table.

 

“I need to use the restroom,” she whispered and then disappeared.

 

Ahjussi suddenly appeared to take the plates from me. “I’ll do that, Mister Cho. Please just sit,” he said.

 

“Thanks, ahjussi,” I said.

 

“Did you get her back?” he whispered.

 

I chuckled bitterly. “No… not yet, ahjussi. But I’ll never stop trying.”

 

“She loves you,” he said.

 

“She loves everyone she knows,” I replied.

 

“Ah, Mister Cho, do you know the three kinds of love?” he asked. I shook my head. “Well, one is agape. That is unconditional, selfless and sacrificial love. That is what you are perhaps pertaining to. The second one is philia, the friendship kind of love. And the last one is eros. The romantic kind of love. When she looks at you, that’s the kind of love I see. She may be hiding it, or controlling her feelings, but I know that’s what she feels for you. I know, because it’s the same kind of love I see from you when you look at her. That’s why you shouldn’t give up on Miss Park. Plus, you’ve already worked hard on this vineyard for years. I wouldn’t want to see it to be someone else’s land... someone who didn’t work hard on it… someone doesn’t deserve it.”

 

I chuckled. “Thanks, ahjussi.” I stood up from my seat and went down the corridor, like what I would always do before leaving this place. I would stare at Kyesin’s family portrait for minutes, admiring her hazel eyes. Even in a painting, her eyes could captivate me, but nothing beats the real thing. She looked really happy in the painting. It’s been awhile since I saw her that happy. In fact, I haven’t seen her that happy ever since she came back. Maybe she is… just when I’m not around…

 

“Ahjussi says you always look at this painting when you’re here,” I suddenly heard Kyesin say behind me. I spun around.

 

“Ready to go?” I asked.

 

She nodded. “I’ve already said goodbye to ahjussi and ahjumma.”

 

“Alright, let’s go,” I said. As I opened the door, a flash of lightning and a loud roar of thunder came echoing. “I didn’t expect it to rain today, let alone this hard.”

 

“Me neither,” Kyesin whispered. “Do you have an umbrella?”

 

I shook my head. “I’ll go ask ahjussi.”

 

I went to the kitchen where ahjumma was cleaning. “Oh, Mister Cho, you haven’t left yet?”

 

“No, ahjumma. It’s raining really hard outside. Do you have any umbrella?” I asked.

 

“Hmm.. I’m not sure…” she took a look at their cupboard. “I’m sorry, there’s none. We usually use raincoats.”

 

“Ah, I see.. Thank you anyway.”

 

“Yes of course, Mr. Cho. Have a safe trip back home.”

 

I nodded. “Thank you.”

 

I went back to the living room. “Were you able to borrow?”

 

“No,” I shook my head. “They didn’t have any. Just use my coat. The car’s not that far away anyway.”

 

She pouted at me. “What will you use, then?”

 

“I’ll just run,” I said. “Now come on.”

 

“I’m not leaving here until I know you won’t get rained on. You have schedules to attend to, Kyuhyun!” she said.

 

I sighed. “I’ll be fine.”

 

“Do you remember… when we went to Gwanghwamun?”

 

I sighed again. “That was your fault and yes, I do remember.”

 

“See? That might happen again,” she said.

 

“Kyesin, I’m old now. I won’t get sick over a few minutes of being under the rain. In any case, it’s you I’m worried for, okay? You get sick faster than I do,” I said. I took my coat off and put it on her head.

 

But Kyesin, stubborn as ever, took the coat from her head and shared it with me. There was no way the two of us could fit, so we both were getting wet. But she’s still as kind as ever. She always puts my needs above hers. Even after hurting her, and all these years apart, her love for me never faded.

 

“You’re one stubborn girl,” I said. I took the coat from her, putting it back on her head and wrapping it around her. I bent down and swoop her into my arms, carrying her back to the car.

 

“Kyuhyun, put me down!” she said.

 

“This is better,” I said, smirking at her. “I’ll be fine. Don’t worry about me. We’re almost there anyway.”

 

She rolled her eyes at me. “Fine. It’s about time those muscles you grew into were put into use.”

 

I laughed. “I didn’t work out to get girls… Besides wanting to stay healthy, I wanted to expand my chest…”

 

“To have more air capacity?”

 

“Yes… It has helped me a lot in musicals,” I replied.

 

“Well I like it,” she said, looking at me. “It suits you. You don’t look so fragile anymore.”

 

I chuckled, putting her down as I unlocked the car. She quickly got in and I ran to my side. Hair was a bit wet, dripping down on my face, but it was fine. As long as she was dry.

 

I revved the engine and turned the heater on. Kyesin took a handkerchief from her bag and handed it to me. “Here, oppa…”

 

My heart nearly broke out of my ribcage. She hasn’t called me that for years. I stared at her and got lost in her hazel eyes, speechless.

 

She sighed and wiped my face. “I don’t want you to get sick any more than you want me to be okay,” she said. She took my hands from the steering wheel and dried each one.

 

“Kye….” I softly said as she wiped my hands.

 

“Yeah?” she asked.

 

“You’re my home,” I said, holding her soft little hand in mine. “You, my family, the members… you all are.“

 

She bit her lip then sat straight. She put her seatbelt on. “I think we should go now. This storm is getting worse. Let’s go… before I do or say something I might regret.”

 

I sighed in defeat. I put my seatbelt on and drove back home.

 

We were already on the expressway to Seoul when a couple of police cars have barricaded the way in both sides. “What’s going on?” I asked.

 

“I don’t know,” she replied worriedly. I slowed down to talk to one of the police officers.

 

“Officer, what seems to be the problem? Can’t we get to the other side?” I asked.

 

“We’re sorry for the inconvenience sir, but the storm knocked over a lamp post and blocked the whole expressway. You can’t pass this way to Seoul,” he explained.

 

“Oh… Can’t you remove it?”

 

“The crane to carry the post will be arriving in a couple of hours. This storm is bringing damage to different places and right now, a lot of roads are obstructed.”

 

“I see. Is there any other way to Seoul besides this one?” I asked.

 

“There is one but you will have to take the country side. Make a u-turn from here, go about twelves miles from the end of the expressway and then make a right. You won’t need to pay tolls anymore as you exit. There are also street signs and markers to help you find your way home. But it’s a bit dark and the roads are narrow. It would take you a couple of hours drive too. I suggest you just sleep in for the night if you don’t need to get back urgently.”

 

“Alright, thanks officer.” I rolled my window up. I turned the car around and went back in the from where we came from. “What time… are you meeting… with…”

 

“Nine,” she replied.

 

That was half an hour from now. “Oh… I’m sorry… I didn’t know that this was going to happen.”

 

“It’s okay, Kyu. It’s not your fault,” she said.

 

“I promise I’ll take you home as fast as I could.”

 

“You know what? I think the officer is right. By the time we exit this expressway, it would be already ten in the evening. Why don’t we go find some place to sleep there? I don’t think it’s safe to drive in this weather too,” she said.

 

“But what about…”

 

“Don’t worry. I’ll explain everything. This isn’t your fault,” she said.

 

“Are you sure about this?

 

“Yes,” she nodded.

 

“Alright.”

 

“I better call him now before he starts to worry.”

 

Kyesin took out her phone and dialed his number. He didn’t take long to answer. They spoke in English, most of it I didn’t understand but I was sure she was explaining to him that she’ll be fine with me.

 

She breathed deeply and then handed me the phone. “He wants to talk to you.”

 

“Hello?” I breathed over the line.

 

“Hello, Kyuhyun. Good evening,” he greeted like a CEO. “I’ll make this quick since you’re driving. I understand the circumstances are beyond your control, so please do not worry. You’re not violating any of my terms, for now. Since I have no way to reach Kyesin, I would like to ask you to please take care of her for me,.”

 

“Of course I will,” I said, temper rising again.

 

“Good. PLease be aware that my warning is still in place. If she calls me crying, you know what I would do.”

 

“I know that. You don’t have to remind me.” I tried to keep calm.

 

“I’m glad you recognize your limitations. Thank you. Well then, I have nothing else to say. Please give the phone back to Kyesin. Have a safe drive, Mister Cho,” he said.

 

“Here,” I said, giving the phone back. She took it from me and they talked for a couple of minutes more.

 

“I’m sorry,” she whispered after hanging up. “I know you don’t like him, but think of it this way, what would you do if you were in his place and he was in yours? He just wants to protect me, just like you do.”

 

I sighed. She was right. “I guess… I don’t like him since he has you, and I don’t.”

 

She looked at me. “You’ve always been unable to control your temper when you’re jealous.”

 

I chuckled. “Yeah… that’s right.”

 

She looked outside the window. “Though I’ve always found you cute when you’re jealous. Scary, when you’ve reached your limit… but cute.”

 

“Do I… look cute now?” I asked.

 

At the corner of my eye, I saw her purse her lips. “Yes,” she answered in a whisper. Even in the dark I knew she was blushing. “But at least now, you have the guts to admit it when you really are jealous.”

 

“Well there’s really no point of denying it now.. Seeing how I act and all.”

 

She laughed. “Right.”

 

“Don’t you believe me? Don’t you believe it when I tell you that I love you?” I asked.

 

“It’s not that I don’t… I just don’t want to…” she whispered, looking away.

 

My heart broke. “Why?”

 

“Because I don’t know whether or not that will fade again,” she answered hesitantly.

 

“It won’t, Kye, because it never has. I know you don’t believe me right now, but… I’m telling you the truth,” I said.

 

“Do you think I’m not hurting, Kyuhyun? Do you think it doesn’t hurt to give up someone you really love?”

 

My hands clenched on the steering wheel. “You’re wrong. I know how you feel. I can see the pain in your eyes every time you look at me. And I will never forgive myself for causing you that pain. But I’m sure I am also the only one who can ease you of that pain, Kye. Only if you trust me again.”

 

I glanced briefly at her as her sad eyes looked at me. “Sometimes, I wish I was back in high school… When things were so simple…” she whispered.

 

I sighed. “I’m sorry… I’m sorry. We shouldn’t be talking about these things on a day like this. It’s your birthday. You should be happy and celebrating.”

 

At the corner of my eye, I saw her smiling. “I’d rather repair my relationship with you than go out on a binge and celebrate on my birthday.”

 

“Oh…”

 

“Well I could proudly say that it’s much better now than when I came back,” she said. “Kyu, I’d like us to stay friends.”

 

“You know I want something much more than that,” I said. “But at least that’s something closer than what I really want.”

 

She laughed at me, not because what I said was absurd, but because she found it cute. I knew because I’ve known her for years. I know her antics and the way she reacts. “Oh, Kyuhyun, I give up,” she chuckled.

 

“I won’t,” I said, glancing quickly at her to give her a smile.

 

She chuckled, shook her head and looked out of the window. “Do you think this rain will stop soon?”

 

“Hmm… I hope so. The roads are starting to get flooded,” I said.

 

“I didn’t even think it would rain today.”

 

“Me neither,” I replied.

 

“Oh…” she muttered, looking at me.

 

“What?” I asked.

 

She looked at me some more for a couple of seconds before shaking her head. “Nothing. I just found something curious…”

 

“What is it?”

 

“It’s too early to say it. I might just be presumptuous.”

 

“Presumptuous about what?”

 

She sighed. “Do you think it’s a bit odd that when we go out, alone, sudden harsh weathers come our way? But… no… it’s happened only twice. It must be just coincidence…”

 

“What do you mean?”

 

“Remember when I went to Donghae’s apartment to work on your data… and now this…”

 

“Oh……” I saw it now. She was right. A snow storm stopped us from parting ways that night… And now this rain… “Do you think fate is playing with us?”

 

She shrugged. “I don’t know… My logic-reliant mind prohibits me to believe in fate. Do you believe in those stuff?”

 

“Hmm.. not really. I believe in God. So I believe that if things are supposed to happen, they will happen,” I answered.

 

She nodded her head. “Well, let’s just say it’s coincidence for now. But if it happens for the third time, then I concede.”

 

“Alright, fine,” I chuckled.

 

We fell silent after that. I drove while she just looked out the window. She was quite in a good mood, no hint of annoyance or irritation at all. After a few minutes, we exited the expressway. There are a couple of small hotels in the area. I headed for the most decent looking one.

 

“Wait, let me go check if there are any rooms available before you go down. Someone might recognize you there,” she said.

 

“Oh. okay. Wait, take my coat--” I tried to say but she already opened the door and went down the car.

 

I watched as Kyesin ran to the hotel. After a couple of minutes, she came back. “You should’ve taken my coat. Look at you. Now you’re all wet,” I scolded.

 

“They don’t have any vacant rooms anymore, Kyu. There are apparently a lot who’s also stuck like us,” she said.

 

“No worries. We could try another hotel,” I said.

 

We must’ve went to ten hotels but none had any vacant rooms. Kyesin was already drenched from the rain. I was already desperate to find some place we could stay at so she could finally rest.

 

The next hotel we went to was small. It didn’t look grand but it wasn’t cheap like a motel would look like either. It looked more of a family owned inn. Kyesin went down again in the rain to check. She went back after a couple of minutes.

 

“They have a room available but only one,” she said.

 

I sighed and look at her. “Wanna take this one? I could sleep on the couch or the floor. Or I could even sleep in the car.”

 

She looked at me worriedly. “Kyuhyun…”

 

“We’ve been to so many hotels now and all of them are booked. What do you think is the chance that we would find one with two vacant rooms? By the time we realize that we can’t, this hotel’s room has gone,” I said.

 

“I know… I know it’s almost impossible but…”

 

“Don’t think of my image, Kye. I can hide. I promise. I can go to three ddeokbokki restaurants in Korea in a week without anyone recognizing me. Please, Kye. You’re soaking wet and I bet your head must be aching by now,” I argued.

 

“Are you sure it’s really alright?” she asked.

 

“Yes,” I nodded. “I promise. If you don’t want me with you in the room, I could always look for another one or sleep here in my car. I don’t mind, really.”

 

She sighed. “No… there’s probably a couch in the room. You can sleep there. As you said, it’s might be hard to find another hotel with a vacant room, and I can’t let you sleep in the car. Stay here. I’ll check us in. I’ll come back for you when everything is set.”

 

She went out of the car again and into the hotel. I fixed my hair and put on my spectacles, taking other precautions that I won’t get recognized. She came back after a couple of minutes. I turn the engine off, went out my car and ran inside the hotel. Keeping my head down, I followed Kye hurried to our room.

 

The room was bigger than what I expected. In the middle was a queen sized bed and on the side was a long couch.

 

“I asked for extra blankets and luckily, this is their last one,” she said, handing one to me. “You can have the other pillow too.”

 

“Thanks,” I said. As I took the pillow from her, I happen to accidentally graze her hand. She felt warm. I put the pillow down on the couch and went towards her. I put my hand on her forehead. She closed her eyes, sighing in defeat. She was trying to hide the fact that she was already starting to get a fever. “Kye, go take a bath. It’s not good to just get soaked in the rain,” I instructed.

 

“I have nothing to wear,” she replied.

 

I took my coat off and my thick sweater, lucky that I wear at least two layers of clothing always. I wore four today - my coat, my sweater, my buttoned shirt, and a wifebeater.

 

“Wear these for the meantime,” I said. “We’ll hang your clothes overnight. They should be fine when we wake up in the morning.”

 

“Won’t you get cold?” she asked.

 

I shook my head. “I’ll be fine. Don’t worry about me. Go on. You’re getting sicker by the second.”

 

She nodded, probably too sick and tired to fight with me. “You may sleep ahead if you want to. Thank you for lending me your clothes. Good night, Kyuhyun.”

 

“Good night,” I replied and nodded and she went in the bathroom. I ed my shirt to make it loose. I turn the lights off and lay down on the couch to sleep. Actually, I didn’t mind where I was sleeping. I could literally fall asleep anywhere. Literally anywhere. But this time I couldn’t. Not until I know that Kyesin is well and resting.

 

I waited for her to come out of the bathroom. But I kept my eyes closed. I knew if I had looked at her wearing my clothes, I could snap anytime, jeopardizing my chance to be with her now that Mr CEO has put up some rules. I heard Kyesin close the bathroom door.

 

And then I felt her carrying my head, putting it on a more comfortable position on the pillow. I felt her fix my blanket, making sure that my feet are under it. And then, I felt her brush my cheeks and hair with her warm hand. “I had fun today. It was a really beautiful birthday, Kyuhyun. Thank you for your gifts… and thank you for making me happy today,” she whispered. “Goodnight, my love. Sleep well.”

 

I want to open my eyes and kiss her. I wanted to tell her I love her. But I know it would be wrong. I was trying very hard to restrain myself and behave.

 

I heard her climb on the bed and spread the blanket. I listened until I couldn’t hear her moving anymore. She was finally asleep. I, too, can finally sleep.

 

“KkkkKkkkKyyyyuuuu…” I heard someone call me, waking me up. It was still very dark. I check my phone. It was two in the morning.

 

“Kkkkyyyyuuuu…” I heard it again.

 

I stood up and checked on Kyesin.

 

“Hey, I’m here,” i whispered sweetly. She was wrapped in a blanket and her eyes were shut tight.

 

“Ccaannn yyyouuu tttuurn up the hhheeaaat?” her teeth clattered as she spoke. She felt cold.

 

“Yes, of course,” I replied. I took the remote for the heater and tried to raise the temperature but it was already as high as it could go. “Kye, this is as high as it could get. How are you feeling?” I put my hand on her forehead. She was burning hot!

 

“Iii feeeeeel cccoooooold…” she said.

 

I took my blanket and a dry towel from the bathroom and put it on her. “How’s that?” I asked.

 

“Sssstill…. Cccooold…” she replied.

 

I looked around. There was nothing else to keep her warm. I sighed. “I’m sorry, I don’t have any other choice…” I whispered as I lay down beside her and went under her covers.

 

Kyesin immediately put her arms around me, pressing her cheek on my chest. She smiled. “Ssoo… wwaaarm… Th….thaaank… yyyoouu…” she said.

 

I wrapped my arms around her tight. “Do you feel better?” I asked.

 

She nodded.

 

“May I stay here?”

 

She nodded again.

 

“Kyuhyun…” she could already speak clearly after a few minutes. “Thank you.”

 

“Anything for you, of course,” I replied.

 

“The answer is yes…” she whispered.

 

“Huh? Answer to what?”

 

“When you asked me… if you still felt like home to me… the answer is yes.” She looked at me.

 

My heart beat fast. As I look into her hazel eyes, I can’t help but feel like how we were before. My arms wrapped themselves tighter around her. My head inched closer to hers. I want to kiss her.

 

Our lips were just literally an inch away, and our foreheads connected. She closed her eyes. I want to kiss her.

 

But I knew I couldn’t. I can’t take the risk that I might not see her again if I kiss her now. My lips were aching for hers, but there’s nothing I could do.

 

I sighed. “I love you,” I whispered. “I love you but you know I can’t do it.”

 

She pressed her face back to my chest. “Well, at least now I know that you really are serious about getting me back.”

 

I brushed her hair with my hand. “Would you like me to sing you to sleep? Just like before?”

 

“Yes, please,” she answered.

 

“Alright. Good night, love,” I said.

 

“Hey Kyu…”

 

“Yeah?” I replied.

 

She inched closer to me. “I love you, too,” she whispered before closing her eyes.

 

My heart went frantic! Haywire! I know she could feel it since her head is on my chest. She chuckled as well.

 

I honestly haven’t felt like this in such a long time. Only she makes me feel this way.

 

I breathed deeply to calm myself down and started singing one of the songs I sing to her before. With her eyes closed, she smiled, and slowly drifted to sleep.

 

Kyesin has always been a very independent girl. She likes to do things on her own and avoids pretty much asking for help from anyone. But she needed me now. And it felt great. It felt like she’s slowly trusting me again, and that’s good.

 

For a moment, I could pretend that she is mine again. For a moment, I could feel her warmth and her love again - one of the best feelings in the world. And for a moment, everything was perfect. This is more than what I could ask for.

 

 

 

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