Final

Royal Pains

"Your majesty!"

Great. Baekhyun knows that voice all too well. "Huh?" he replies, not even attempting to correct his response. It's a frigid day and he's still rather upset by icicles that formed on his toilet seat.

"Your majesty, huh is for hors-- oh, wait... it's hey-- oh nevermind. You wouldn't listen to my etiquette instructions anyways. I'm not even sure why I try to fix your awful slang anymore." Joonmyun gathers the bottom of his robe in a huff, before extracting an envelope from his pocket with an exaggerated flourish. Baekhyun is never off-put by his servant's formality; he knows it's just how Joonmyun rolls.

"What's this?" Baekhyun asks, turning the envelope over. It's made of satin paper, embossed at the edges in gold leaf. Some snooty, uppity person trying to kiss-up to him through tasteful stationary, perhaps?

"Ah, it's a summoning," Joonmyun replies, blinking incessantly. "From your brother."

So it WAS a snooty, uppity person trying to kiss-up to him through tasteful stationary. "Why does Sehun have to send me a letter every time he wants something?" Baekhyun whines, tearing open the envelope carelessly. "He could easily just walk down his corridor and ask me in person. Plus, he's younger than me and yet he acts as if he rules over the entire Glacies kingdom. He even had the nerve to steal my favorite defroster a few days ago. Do you see what I mean, Joonmyun?"

Joonmyun merely raises his eyebrows in amusement.

Smoothing out the bent edges of the letter, Baekhyun begins to read. "My dearest older brother... get your down to the throne room as soon as possible." He lets a furious sound slip from his throat. "Love, your ever-caring younger brother, Sehun." Baekhyun is just about to crush the paper with his boot, when Joonmyun rescues it from his angry grasp.

"Hold on just a second, your majesty," the servant pleads, uncrumpling the letter. His eyes skim Sehun's crude handwriting before he reaches the bottom, where a tiny postscript graces the surface. "It says here, P.S. Father says you've come of age (lol) and has decided to plan your courting ball this afternoon. As a result, he would like for you to come to the throne room at once."

At first, Baekhyun isn't sure what he finds more disturbing -- the fact that Joonmyun read "lol" as "El. Oh. El.", with long pauses between each syllable -- or that his father has decided that his son has reached marrying age and plans to find him a wife through the kingdom's old-fashioned courting ball method. A wife. When will anyone in the kingdom understand? "I don't want to get married," Baekhyun says firmly, looking at Joonmyun defiantly. "I am not going to the throne room." He knows his servant will listen to Baekhyun's father, the King, first and foremost, but he wishes that just for this occasion, he might disobey once and let Baekhyun have his way.

"No, don't even think about challenging your father," Joonmyun responds, brows furrowed as he returns Baekhyun's stubborn glare. "You're going to the throne room immediately."

"You can't make me."

Joonmyun shoots Baekhyun a withering frown. "Baekhyun, you're nearly twenty years old at this time. As we are all well-aware, your father has your best intentions in mind. Acting like a child to get your way won't change your situation, nor his orders. As someone who your father has provided to aid you in all your pursuits, I advise that you follow his instructions and meet him in the throne room."

Baekhyun manages one last glare before he emits an enormous sigh. "Alright," he agrees. "I'll go. But only because you'd lecture me otherwise."

Joonmyun smiles wide, displaying his entire top row of teeth. Baekhyun has learned in recent years that he only does this when he is beyond relieved. "Thank you. Well, I need to assist Minseok in preparing tonight's supper, so I will see you later, your majesty."

"For the last time, call me Baekhyun," the prince says wearily, but he nods good-naturedly at Joonmyun's retreating figure. Now, he guesses, would be a good time to approach the throne room. As he ambles down the long halls of the palace, he can't help but marvel at the sleek walls, made entirely of ice and detailed with intricate carvings. In some places, the ice is stained blue and gold by plant pigments, swirling in elaborate designs. Gilded benches line the sides of the hallway, dripping with silver icicles. A cool, sweet breeze lingers in the air, fluttering the tips of the indigo tapestries hanging from the walls. He's walked these halls all his life, yet the wintry beauty of the place never ceases to amaze him.

He's rather privileged, you could say, to be the next in line for the throne over Glacies, the ice kingdom. He's privileged, but he isn't happy about it. In the end, he doesn't mind attending his courting ball or submitting to his father's orders. It's the prospect of finding a wife that frightens him. No one knows his deepest secret, not even Joonmyun -- that he does not care for ladies or princesses, but instead longs for a male companion. For a friend, a lover, a husband. Not a confidant like Joonmyun, nor a brother like Sehun, but someone he can spill his thoughts and heart out to wholly. Someone additionally good-looking wouldn't hurt, either.

Shaking out of his reverie, Baekhyun places a hand nervously on the great brass door handle of the throne room entrance. He glances at the guard, who gives him a nod through his metal helmet. With a push, he hears the loud creak of the door and is greeted by a chilly blast of air from the room.

The throne room, simply put, is intimidating. Its ceilings are high and looming, fitted with solid slabs of ice, carved with scenes of battle and royalty. The floor is clean, impenetrable ice, divided in half by a blood-red carpet runner, which leads to two massive thrones encrusted with star sapphires. On the left throne, bundled in soft furs and a blue robe, sits Baekhyun's father, the King of Glacies. Baekhyun gulps as he spots the king's impressive frame.

"Ah, Baekhyun," the great man booms, beckoning for Baekhyun to come closer. "You finally listened to your younger brother, eh? Well, you made the right decision." He claps his son on his back a little too heartily, causing Baekhyun to stagger slightly. "You fall too easily, my son. If you want to get married, you should toughen up, or no woman will want you."

Baekhyun cringes at this, quickly twisting his mouth into a smile. "It's just, I'm not sure if I'm ready for marriage, father," he says quietly, not daring to meet the king's eyes. "I know I've said this several times, but I don't... want to get married just yet."

"Nonsense," the king replies, rising from his seat. "You're at a decent age to marry and I need a reliable heir and family to pass the crown to after I am long gone. I'm not growing any younger as the days pass by. This is what is best for everyone. You must think past your own, singular desires once in a while and imagine what the rest of the kingdom needs."

"Father, I don't --"

"Baekhyun." The king places a massive hand on his son's bony shoulder. "The courting ball will occur in six days. Whether you like it or not, from it, you will make a woman your wife. There are no further questions asked. As you are being uncooperative, I will discuss the details with your mother and plan out the specifics with Joonmyun. You are dismissed."

Angry tears pool in Baekhyun's eyes as he bursts out of the door, heading straight for his room. He knows his father, his beliefs, his ideas, his unrelenting prejudice against those outside the norm. If he told the king that he didn't desire a woman for a wife, he knew the man would indubitably erupt, perhaps barring his son from ever entering the kingdom again. But Baekhyun loves his father and his home, so in the security of his bed, swaddled in his favorite comforter, he decides that he will let his personal preferences go, and instead take a wife as his father wishes.

Baekhyun spends the rest of the day lingering in the kitchens, bothering Minseok and snatching away bits of food, until the chefs kick him out with much light-hearted laughter. The prince then visits Sehun, who is engrossed in his electronic devices, recently delivered from nearby Virtualia. You see, every kingdom revolves around a few specific exports in which they have a comparative advantage. Glacies, the ice kingdom, manufactures the world's supply of ice chests, frozen goods, and glass. Virtualia, to Baekhyun and Sehun's mother's utter dismay, produces highly addictive electronics and games.

"Hey," Baekhyun greets his brother, sliding onto the bed next to the younger prince. "What are you playing?" Sehun grunts in response, eyes glued to the three-dimensional screen of his handheld device. Baekhyun tries another tactic to make his sibling speak. "I talked to father. The courting ball is in six days."

At this, Sehun's face shoots upward, eyes round and questioning. "Six days? All those princesses are coming in six days? What! That's not enough time for me to undergo a major makeover. Ask father for two weeks, at the very least. I have to look good."

Baekhyun chuckles, ruffling Sehun's unruly black hair. "Father's word is law, literally. You know that." Something in his heart falls as he says this, but he quickly shoves his personal thoughts to the background of his mind. "You're invited, of course, but you can't be disruptive or I'll kill you in your sleep." Baekhyun contorts his face into his best "serial-killer look", lifting his lips into something akin to a murderous sneer.

Sehun merely snorts. "You look so ugly. How will any princess want you?"

"Thanks a lot," Baekhyun bites, feigning hurt. "But you fail to see my magnetic personality and charming good looks. I am quite a catch, if I do say so myself."

With one eye squinted shut, Sehun pretends to appraise his older brother, circling him on the bed with a judgmental stare. "Nope," he concludes. "I don't see said qualities in this animal."

"! Did you just call me an animal?"

Suddenly, Baekhyun and Sehun are on the floor, wrestling playfully, batting at each other's faces. When the two detach themselves from each other, panting hard, Sehun smiles fondly. "I'm going to miss my hyung when he gets married," he admits shyly. "But tell me truthfully, do you actually want to get married? You're still awfully young to settle down."

"It's not like I have a choice. But in truth... no. I don't want to get married now. In fact, the more I think about the event, the more I despise it. Sometimes, I wish... I wish I were not a prince so I could do as I pleased. I would remain single for my entire life, only marrying if I truly found someone I loved. I hate the idea of marrying a princess to whom I am entirely indifferent. It wouldn't be fair for her, and it wouldn't mean anything to me." Baekhyun collapses on the bed with a sigh, blinking up at the ceiling.

Sehun is silent for a solid minute before he speaks, voice hushed in a serious tone. "Father wouldn't like what you just said. You know how he is. He hates disobedience and nontraditional ideas."

Baekhyun turns his head to look at his brother, cheek pressed into the blanket. "I know, Sehun," he whispers. "I know it all too well."

 

---

 

The day of the ball comes quickly -- much too quickly for Baekhyun's liking and apparently, much too inconveniently for the castle's staff. Less than two hours before the opening of the gates, Joonmyun is ordering the chefs, the butlers, and the maids around, sweat dripping down his temples. It's a rarity for Joonmyun to look unpolished, but right now, he's much too busy to care about his appearance.

Baekhyun has camped in his own room, alternately cringing at his dolled-up appearance in the mirror and steeling himself for the upcoming night. He's wearing a midnight blue suit and a crisp white dress-shirt, complete with a soft blue silk tie. His black hair has been mussed with innumerable gels and creams, tousled over his forehead in artful bangs. The tiniest bit of eyeliner accentuates his eyes, paired with mahogany eye shadow. Slipping on a pair of black leather brogues, Baekhyun takes one last glance at his room -- a place of well-needed solitude. If -- no, after, he finds a wife, he doesn't know the next time he'll be able to find quiet privacy.

Exiting his room, Baekhyun feels a wave of regret and fear wash over him, tingling his nerves in the most unpleasant of ways. When Joonmyun catches him in the hallway, the servant clasps his wrist, guiding him to the ballroom. "You're late," Joonmyun accuses, frowning at the prince. His face soon straightens out, transforming into a look of worry. "You look wonderful, your maj -- Baekhyun, but are you feeling alright? You look nearly sick."

"I'm fine," Baekhyun manages, though his stomach is twisting horribly. "Must be the nerves." Joonmyun nods at this, but he looks unconvinced.

Stepping into the expanse of the ballroom, Baekhyun is speechless. He has never really entered the room before, always opting to visit the kitchens or gardens. Because of the courting festivities, silver silk banners are threaded around the golden pillars and strings of pearly lanterns illuminate the glass floor. Long tables of delicacies and molten cakes line the patterned walls, giving off a delicate odor. But most shockingly of all, the ballroom is not silent and empty as it appears most of the year, collecting cobwebs. Instead, hundreds of gorgeous ladies grace the dance floor, twirling in tulle and damask and charmeuse and lace, in reds and golds and blues and greens. Their silk slippers and towering heels click against the floor, creating an orchestra of gentle sounds.

As Baekhyun approaches the throne threshold where his parents sit with satisfied smiles, the king leaps up, taking him roughly by the shoulder. "My son, the prince of Glacies, has arrived!" he proclaims, urging Baekhyun to sit on the third, empty chair. Baekhyun obliges, blushing as the ladies turn to ogle him. He knows that for them, he is but a political tool and a stepping stone to a higher status. It feels like an auction. He sinks further into his throne, silently wishing to disappear, but Joonmyun hisses at him to sit up.

"Tonight's events will unfold as such," the king continues, throwing his arms up in grandiose gestures. "The prince will dance with each lady until our trustworthy adviser, Joonmyun, deems a worthy pair." Baekhyun feels rather ill as he hears this. There isn't the slightest chance of personal inclination in the process, not to mention, love. "Then, with my and the queen's blessing and affirmation, the two will be married this weekend."

This weekend? Baekhyun's stomach is a raging storm and his mind, a tangled web of thoughts. Joonmyun offers him a sympathetic glance. "Don't worry, Baekhyun," the servant assures under his breath, patting the prince's arm calmly. "I will choose someone good for you. I'll try my best, don't worry." Baekhyun provides a weak smile, but by now, he isn't even sure WHAT is good for him anymore. As much as he loves Joonmyun, he knows no one would be able to pick the right companion for him, save for himself. And yet, as things go, he isn't allowed to do such a thing.

Sweet music lights the air, playing from the small band set in the corner, and suddenly, Baekhyun is being pulled into the crowd, welcomed with dozens of soft greetings from the princesses and duchesses. He's into someone's arms and finds himself swaying unwillingly with a unnamed woman, her round eyes staring up at him curiously. He's never been much of a dancer, but with all attention cast upon him, he gingerly sets his hands on the lady's waist and moves in time to the music. Out of the corner of his eye, he spots Joonmyun, assessing the pair with a clipboard and pencil.

The woman is small of stature and rather ordinary looking. Her red hair is limp and smells toxically of strawberries; her dress is cut low, as to draw observation to her assets. Baekhyun feels repulsed when she whispers something dirty to him, almost stumbling backwards to avoid her enthusiastic grip. Joonmyun is quick to read the situation and he waves over another lady, the first woman slinking away in shame. This princess is dressed entirely in dove grey, her blond hair done up massive curls that hug her forehead. It is quite obvious she cannot dance, stomping all over Baekhyun's poor feet in her sharp stilettos, all while apologizing profusely. Joonmyun gestures for the next in line to approach the prince.

The night drags on like this for another three hours. When a short intermission is announced, Baekhyun all but runs to one of the benches, plopping his exhausted onto the plush cushion with a contented sigh. Joonmyun joins him shortly, handing him the clipboard. "These are my notes," he says. "Take a look."

Skimming through the inked pages, Baekhyun's face brightens. "It's all negative!"

"Now don't be too happy about it," Joonmyun scolds, his voice melting into a yawn. "If anything, you should be worried. If you can't find anyone decent, we'll be here for hours more. No offense, but I don't think I can take another three hours of watching you dance miserably with another six dozen women."

"Aw, c'mon Joonmyun. I don't dance miserably."

"Baekhyun, it's not your dancing that's miserable. Rather, it's..." Joonmyun twists the seal of his ring in contemplation. "You look so unhappy up there. It's written all over your face."

"I am happy," Baekhyun replies slowly, but he isn't sure who he's trying to convince. "But none of this will amount to anything significant. I'm tired, Joonmyun. I just want to go to my bed chambers and sleep."

"Don't we all," Joonmyun snorts, but he pats Baekhyun's thigh reassuringly. "We'll find you someone before midnight, I promise. And you'll learn to love her."

"But you can't promise that," Baekhyun murmurs, mostly to himself.

 

---

 

It's nearly eleven thirty when Baekhyun almost collapses from exhaustion. Eventually, all the faces of each princess blends together into a pretty, nondescript mess that Baekhyun could not give two s about. It's brutal of him to say so, but at this point, he's tempted to choose a girl randomly just to get over the night. Finally, at ten minutes past twelve, he finds someone fairly decent. Joonmyun had tiredly waved a woman over, dressed in red satin. Her jet black hair shines in the moonlight, contrasting sharply with the black designs creeping up the seams of her gown in lustrous flames. Ignis -- the fire kingdom. Baekhyun knows their emblems far too well after attending several welding workshops within their bright gates. And yet when Baekhyun whisks the woman away in a slow dance, he notices a peculiar figure standing out from within the crowd.

It's a man, dressed similarly to the woman color-wise, in a burgundy suit and black shirt. He wears no tie and the first few buttons of his shirt are undone, showing off the strong column of his neck. As Baekhyun whirls around with the lady, his gaze drifts to the tall male, eyes lazily running up and down. The man's hair is dark gray, tousled naturally and pushed off his forehead. It's difficult to make out any facial features due to the distance, but Baekhyun has a vague idea that he's handsome. For one thing, his height cuts an imposing picture among the crowd of shorter females.

With terrible, wicked excitement, Baekhyun feels something spark deep inside his gut that he has not experienced all night -- attraction.


Just then, he's distracted by Joonmyun yawning something so huge, his jaw seems to disconnect. Clearing his mind from the image of the man, Baekhyun decides to conclude the night as neatly as possible. After all, that's what his father wants most of all. Baekhyun was never one to mull over a decision, usually choosing to think with his mouth and to act purely on impulse. It proved a dangerous tactic, but he was quick on his feet, often weaseling out of difficult situations at the last minute. In this case, however, he isn't entirely sure he's making the wisest of selections.

"I've chosen," Baekhyun announces loudly, heart thumping erratically. "This lady will be my wife."

The crowd silences immediately and Baekhyun can feel the heavy stares penetrating his skull. He turns to his father, who has sat up in excitement. "Father, if you and mother would be so kind, I would like your blessing upon my and... and..."

"Seoyeon."

"Yes, my and Seoyeon's marriage." Baekhyun shifts his eyes quickly to the left, searching for the sole male character in the audience. Seeing no one, something falters within him, but he makes sure to maintain a cheerful expression. Had he been dreaming? Was the strange man some hallucination from his last and wildest hopes?

"Absolutely, my son," the king says with a genial smile. "I'm glad you came to your senses." Baekhyun isn't happy with his father's word choices, but he grins back, flexing and unflexing his fingers nervously. At his side, Seoyeon looks shocked and she peers on tiptoes into the crowd of women, obviously hunting for someone. But this someone is nowhere to be found.

When the night closes, the women depart in carriages to their homelands, some grumbling about the prince's choice in companionship. Seoyeon is granted a grand guest room, along with any extra visitors she may have brought. Baekhyun doesn't mind Seoyeon. She's sensible and has a quiet spirit, replying politely to questions and addressing the royal figures with clear respect. She's also very beautiful, with cascading black locks and a small, heart-shaped face. Baekhyun doesn't love her, though. She's much too silent and peaceable, too pure and unmoving. He can't imagine lying in bed with her, talking to her late into the night, sharing the rest of his life with her. His heart thuds sadly as he observes her from a distance, regretting that he wouldn't be able to provide the love she deserved.

But it is how it is. Baekhyun was born a man, a prince. According to his father, his role is next to a woman, eventually yielding a suitable heir for the throne. It's unfortunate, really, how Baekhyun's happiness is dictated by a set of ingrained, mainstream beliefs.

Deciding to escape the suffocating constraints of the castle, Baekhyun sneaks into the garden, taking in the fresh midnight air. The plants are doing well, he muses, noting the rich, full petals of the roses and camellias. The manicured trees are cut neatly into cones, casting fat shadows onto the bluegrass lawns. Caught up in his thoughts, Baekhyun doesn't notice the dark figure crossing the garden grounds, approaching him with every step. Something knocks his shoulder and he stumbles to the ground, hissing as the sharp pebbles of the path scrape his knees.

"Oh my god, I'm so sorry!" The stranger's voice is deep and rumbling and Baekhyun feels a strong hand hoisting him up. It's dark enough outside that Baekhyun can't make out the man's face, but the moonlight catches the suit lapels just right, illuminating them in burgundy streaks. The man from the ballroom. Baekhyun's heart skips a full beat.

"It's not a problem," he responds, mouth dry. So he hadn't been dreaming, after all. With a hearty grin, he dusts away at his knees and jacket, before extending a hand. "Baekhyun," he provides, watching as the man's eyes widen considerably.

"Y-your majesty," the stranger splutters, dropping to one knee, his head bent to face the floor. "I'm so sorry, I-I-I didn't know it was you. I should have watched where I was going. Please forgive me."

Baekhyun chuckles, placing a gentle hand on the other's shoulder. Was that weird? He retracts it quickly, clearing his throat. "It's fine, really. And please, call me Baekhyun. I really hate formalities and we're probably around the same age anyways -- we should act comfortably with one another."

"Right, right, of course. Comfortable."

"Can we go inside?" Baekhyun asks, shivering. "It's getting cold."

"It's your palace."

Baekhyun laughs and it's the first time he's felt relatively free the whole night. "I'm only freezing my off here." He pauses, tilting his head slightly. "I'm sorry, I don't think I caught your name."

"Oh!" The man sheepishly rubs the back of his neck. "I'm Chanyeol. Seoyeon's brother."

"Seoyeon has a brother?" Baekhyun exclaims, any semblance of a filter gone from his mouth. This man was his brother-in-law?

"She didn't mention me? I'm offended." Chanyeol pulls a frown jokingly. "I'm sorry I interrupted the ball. I must have looked pretty strange as the only guy in the audience."

"No, you're fine," Baekhyun says, biting back the urge to add, "Very fine." In the light of the palace, Baekhyun can see Chanyeol clearly, from his mussed, grey tresses to his long legs. His face is alert and attractive, accented by a sharp jawline. Baekhyun swallows noisily as his gaze catches on the other's big, capable-looking hands. "So you're from Ignis, I'm assuming. The red suit and all."

Chanyeol's eyes flicker intentionally, confirming Baekhyun's guess. Only those from fire-channeling country can control their emotions to the point that it manifests as actual flames. Each kingdom holds a special power; the citizens of Glacies can form frost from their fingertips once triggered by an overwhelming feeling, be it fear, guilt, or joy. Apparently, Baekhyun has not reached such a level of emotion, as he has yet to display this ability.

"It's funny how you chose a lady from the fire kingdom," Chanyeol comments as they walk to the guest chambers. "Since you're from the ice kingdom and everything. It's rather paradoxical." Baekhyun watches in amusement as the other man ducks under the glass archway, carefully accommodating for his above-average height.

"Love has no limits, I guess," Baekhyun replies, flinching at his own words. "Why did you accompany Seoyeon here? Not that I don't enjoy your company, I'm only wondering."

"I just had a few insignificant errands over in Virtualia. Seoyeon doesn't like traveling alone, so I followed her here, to Glacies. I didn't really know a courting ball -- your courting ball -- was happening, though. I felt pretty out of place among all those ladies."

"Hey," Baekhyun says, fitting an elaborate key into the brass doorknob of one of the guest rooms. "At least you didn't have to dance with all six hundred of them. My poor feet were practically screaming afterwards from all of the badly targeted stiletto heels."

Chanyeol laughs loudly. It's a rich, deep sound that courses through Baekhyun's veins, warm and friendly. "Well, here we are," he announces, throwing open the door. Somehow, he feels much happier and lighter as he turns to face his new friend, who smiles widely in return. "It was excellent meeting you, Chanyeol. I'll see you tomorrow morning?"

"Definitely." Chanyeol plunks himself onto the bed, engulfing himself with the covers. "Man, I totally expected the ice kingdom to consist of stuffy noblemen and freezing temperatures. I mean, that's what's taught in our textbooks." He frowns, staring up at Baekhyun with blazing eyes. "It's stupid that our countries create false, baseless stereotypes of one another. If I had known there were people like you here, I would have visited Glacies more often in the past."

Baekhyun feels heat stealing across his cheeks. "The same goes for you. We're often told that the people of Ignis are hot-headed and easily irritable. But you... you don't seem that way at all."

"Barely any of the Ignis citizens are like that," Chanyeol agrees, flipping onto his back. "As crown prince, I would know."

"You're a prince?" Baekhyun squawks, momentarily forgetting all about the time and the fact that the sun rises in about three hours. "Wait, of course you are, Seoyeon's a princess."

"Right, genius," Chanyeol says, shooting Baekhyun a teasing smile. The golden flames in his eyes are dancing.

"So I'll see you tomorrow at breakfast?" Baekhyun asks, inwardly groaning when his voice comes out a bit too hopeful. He inches toward the door, willing his heart to stop beating so damn fast.

"I wouldn't miss breakfast for the world," Chanyeol laughs, propping his chin up with a fist, staring unrelentingly at the Glacies prince. "And you, of course. I would love to get to know you better."

If Baekhyun wasn't blushing before, his cheeks are aflame now. "Right..." he stutters. "Well then! Good night. I'll see you tomorrow. In the garden. Breakfast tomorrow. I mean..." He slams Chanyeol's door before he can embarrass himself further, sliding to the floor blissfully when he hears the resonant sound of Chanyeol's laugh booming against the walls.

Baekhyun practically floats back to his chambers, reliving the last hour in his head. It feels absolutely sinful to be attracted to Chanyeol when he's engaged to his sister, but Baekhyun lets himself revel in the feeling for just this moment. In the end, nothing will come of it, he tells himself, so it wouldn't hurt to succumb to the temptation just until his wedding day. Then he thinks of Seoyeon and his father and mother and of disappointment and guilt and his heart plummets. Diving into his bed, he fists the blankets furiously, unsure of where to direct his anger. It's wrong, he thinks. It's wrong how he can't have the only thing he wants more than anything in the world. A boyfriend. The word sours on his lips and he knows he's being juvenile, throwing a tantrum within the safety of his room, but he can't help the ache in his heart. Hell, he doesn't even know if Chanyeol likes boys! For one thing, though, he'd at least like the option of pursuing someone he liked, without the strings of parental approval and societal consent. At the very least.

Burying his face into his pillow, he drifts off to sleep, unwashed makeup staining the silk sheets. It's now one day before the wedding, the sun rising in the east like a mocking face.

 

---

Chapter Text

The next morning, Baekhyun finds Chanyeol and Seoyeon already sprawled out on the lawn lounges, under the shade of a huge willow tree. They are bickering over something insignificant as siblings do so wonderfully, Chanyeol waving his arms animatedly while Seoyeon merely scowls, arms crossed over her chest.

"Nothing better than an early morning argument to get the blood pumping, huh?" Baekhyun teases with a smile. At the sound of his voice, Chanyeol whips around, grinning widely. Seoyeon responds with rounded eyes, waving gently at her fiancee.

"Hello, Baekhyun," Seoyeon greets politely. "Oh, by the way, this is Chanyeol, my bro--"

"Seo, we've met. Baekhyun's a great guy... congratulations, Seo."

Baekhyun lowers his eyes shyly at the compliment, missing the slightly clipped tone of Chanyeol's voice. "Joonmyun should be joining us soon to review today's schedu--"

"Here! I'm here! I apologize, your majesty," Joonmyun shouts as he rushes to the clearing, panting heavily as he withdraws yet another clipboard from his satchel. "I mean, Baekhyun. I'm sorry I'm late... Sehun pulled a prank in the kitchen and I had to help the cooks clean it up. Nasty ordeal. Frogs. Flour. A whole lot of carrots. But anyways, today's agenda, right. Let's see what we have lined up... horseback riding after breakfast. Tour of the castle. Lunch. Seoyeon will be at the dressmakers for a few hours. And then... ah yes, a visitation to Ignis to meet Seoyeon's parents. Lovely."

Baekhyun bites his lip at this last part. "Lovely," he repeats, attempting to hide the fear creeping into his voice. Chanyeol notices, however, and places a kind hand on Baekhyun's forearm.

"They'll love you," he says confidently. "Right, Seo?"

"Yes," Seoyeon agrees in her soft, plain voice. "Don't worry about it, Baekhyun. Our parents are very kind people. I know they'll like you immediately."

"This is very cute and all," Joonmyun butts in, squinting at the sun. "But I'd advise you get started on those horses, lest the sun sets before you set out for Ignis. That wouldn't be good."

Chanyeol nods in acquiescence, falling in step beside Baekhyun as Joonmyun leads them to the stables. "You ride much?"

"Recently, not as much as I'd like," Baekhyun admits. "With all of the preparations for the ball and my studies, I haven't had much time for hobbies in general. What about you? You have any interests I should know about?"

"I play the guitar," Chanyeol responds and in some dark corner of his mind, Baekhyun instantly imagines the prowess of Chanyeol's fingers, the strength of his hands when commanding the instrument. Ew, not in front of Seoyeon. He shakes his head indiscernibly, trying to clear the dirty thought. Chanyeol is still talking. "I also play the piano and drums, but guitar will always be my instrument of choice. Do you play anything, Baekhyun?"

"Piano. I'm learning a Dvorak piece right now."

"Dvorak!" Chanyeol claps his hands together in excitement. "Symphony No. 9 in E Minor was one of my childhood favorites, though I'm more partial to Bach and Chopin now. Since I play guitar more often than piano, I'm better acquainted with rock songs than classical music, to be honest, but I still appreciate the old masters."

"Chanyeol's very good at guitar," Seoyeon offers, eyes shining in admiration for her older brother.

"Do you play an instrument?" Baekhyun asks her gently. She's so silent, she always slips into the background, overshadowed by her vibrant brother.

"No," she replies rather sadly, ducking her head shyly. The atmosphere would have quickly become awkward if Chanyeol hadn't spoken up.

"Seoyeon's craft is in needlework and beading. She's an incredible artist. Even some of the best Pars crafters can't compare to her skill." Chanyeol smiles easily, fitting an arm around his sister's shoulders. The group lapses into comfortable conversation about carpets and stitching and that one time Chanyeol set fire to his room's curtains by attempting a science experiment involving hydrochloric acid and weed killer ("For the last time, it was an accident!). Then, Joonmyun directs them to a group of pre-saddled horses, helping Seoyeon swing onto a small gray one.

The day is hot and sticky and Baekhyun can feel the collar of his tunic sticking to his neck. He wipes his brow with the back of his sleeve, frowning when it comes back wet with sweat. Secretly, he steals a glance at Chanyeol and frowns deeper as he watches a single bead slide down the other man's temple. His eyes trace it as it glides down a prominent vein in his neck, sinking beneath his collar to who knows where. The planes of his chest? The ridges of stomach? Even deeper? Subconsciously, Baekhyun his lips before looking away, feeling rather disgusted with himself.

Though the sun beats heavily on the riders, the trail is refreshing and pleasant, lined with long stalks of blue cornflowers and mustard blossoms. The horses plod along easily, pausing occasionally to munch at a clump of lush grass. Seoyeon sits prettily, her straight back a sharp contrast to Chanyeol's careless posture, long legs sticking out comically on either side of the horse's body. Baekhyun and Chanyeol talk easily, but Seoyeon remains reserved, only answering when addressed and laughing courteously when Baekhyun cracks his bad jokes. Baekhyun guesses it's just her personality, but he still finds the urge to ask her privately if he had offended her in any way. As the sun dips lower in the pinkened sky, he decides to do so, steering his horse so that it trots gently beside hers. The two other riders remain in the back, arguing passionately and loudly over sports teams, so privacy isn't a problem at all.

"Seoyeon, are you alright? You've been awfully quiet." Baekhyun watches as his fiancee pales before reddening, delicate hands tightening on the reigns.

"I'm fine," she replies rigidly, before sighing. "Actually..." She looks up and Baekhyun notices something glimmer under her eyelashes. Was she crying? "No, I'm fine, what am I saying. I'm perfectly fine." Smiling somewhat shakily, she in a deep breath before continuing. "I'm extremely blessed to be engaged to you, Baekhyun, and I am truly thankful. I-I don't know if I'm quite ready for such a... such a responsibility, but I promise I'll live up to your expectations."

"Seoyeon, you have no obligations to please me whatsoever," Baekhyun says softly, feeling rather shocked. "I hope I didn't come off as someone who demanded your full attention or anything. I know our engagement was sudden... and trust me, I didn't like the situation much either, but at the very least, I hope we can be friends. I'm not asking for your obedience or even your love, just that we'd get along."

"I'd like that," Seoyeon answers, looking a bit brighter. "And I apologize for my silence. I'm a quiet person and I know that you... and Chanyeol are much more talkative and social, so I'm trying my best to be more extroverted." Her eyes are so tender, so vulnerable and searching for approval, that Baekhyun feels a lump in his throat.

"Seoyeon, I'd never ask for you to change to suit my preferences. I'd rather have you just as you are, just as you'd like to be." He gives her a warm smile and she returns it bashfully. Baekhyun feels at peace now, like a heavy burden has lifted off his back. They ride in peace for a few more minutes before Joonmyun and Chanyeol catch up, the latter humming a tune under his breath. As they turn around to return to the castle, Joonmyun strikes up a mostly one-sided conversation with Seoyeon, rambling unendingly about his troubles with Sehun and his biggest pet peeves. Luckily, Seoyeon is a good listener, nodding in amusement as the servant recounts a particularly riveting tale about Sehun and Baekhyun's legendary April Fool's prank three years ago.

Somehow, Chanyeol and Baekhyun find themselves riding side-to-side again, a few paces behind the other two. Baekhyun learns a great deal about Chanyeol, about his favorite acoustic guitar, about his love for mechanical engineering, about his low spice tolerance, about his overwhelming collection of Rilakkuma dolls ("You tell anyone and I'll hunt you down in your sleep.") He laughs often, with his right eye twitching, and even on the horse, he takes the liberty to slap his knee in delirious happiness. It's contagious, and more than once, Baekhyun doubles over in laughter, tears of mirth leaking from his eyes. Chanyeol, Baekhyun notices, has quirky expressions and pointed ears. He flails randomly when trying to emphasize something, as if his point won't get across without exaggerated motions. He's passionate and energetic and thoughtful and intelligent and with a sense of dread, Baekhyun can feel himself falling.

By the time they return to the palace, it's nearly four PM, to Joonmyun's great chagrin. He apologizes repeatedly, rushing them to the kitchen to grab a bite to eat, before ushering Seoyeon to the dressmaker's room, spewing out multiple "Sorry's!" along the way. Baekhyun and Chanyeol merely laugh at Joonmyun's overboard reaction, stuffing themselves with food and flinging salt and pepper packets at each other like proper adults. Baekhyun is in the middle of chomping on a piece of grilled beef, when Chanyeol gestures at his face, around his mouth.

"You have something here," he prompts.

"Here?" Baekhyun swipes at his lips with napkin.

"No, no," Chanyeol shakes his head and leans forward on his barstool. "Here." With the edge of his thumb, he wipes slowly across Baekhyun's bottom lip, maintaining eye contact the entire time. Baekhyun's heart jumps and he gulps loudly, but he can't seem to jerk away from Chanyeol's touch. He's still right there. Why is he still there?

"My sister's lucky," Chanyeol says, his voice sounding rougher than usual. "Her fiancee is quite the catch. Smart, witty, kind, and attractive to top it off. Damn, I'm kind of jealous."

Baekhyun flushes deeply at this. He doesn't often stumble over his words, but right now, he's speechless. "I-I... I," he tries, wheezing. "Why would you be jealous?"

Unless it was a figment of Baekhyun's half-delusional imagination, Chanyeol smirks. "Well, I hope to be as lucky as Seoyeon in finding a compatible relationship. Either that or I'm actually jealous of her... in other ways." Baekhyun's practically reached cardiac arrest by now.

"Are you flirting with me?"

"You can take that any way you'd like," Chanyeol exhales, leaning back on his seat. "But I'll tell you this... I've never felt this attached to a friend before, and I've only known you for a day and a half. I feel as if I've known you all my life."

"Yeah, I... I think I feel the same."

"Baek, do you love my sister?" Chanyeol asks this with such seriousness, his mouth drawn into a thin line. He his head to the side, waiting for an answer from Baekhyun, who gapes like a goldfish in response. "Tell me the truth."

"I... well, I... I-I think that...." Baekhyun clenches his fingers shut, as if the indentations of his nails will give him the right words to say. But were there any right words? "No," he admits after a spell, drawing his shoulders together in defeat. He glances at Chanyeol with pleading eyes. "I think she's a lovely girl and I'd be the first to say that I'm so damn sorry I can't love her like she deserves, but I don't. I-I can't."

Chanyeol remains silent and fear crawls into Baekhyun's heart as he waits for him to say something. Finally, the taller man heaves a loud sigh, tracing a finger against the veins of the marble counter-top of the bar. "It's mutual, then," Chanyeol breathes, before looking Baekhyun straight in the eyes. "See, before we left, I found Seoyeon in the library of our palace, but she wasn't reading nor engaging in her studies like I had expected. Instead, she was... she was kissing someone. I learned that someone was a farm hand, just an innocent boy, but apparently she had fallen deeply in love with him. Or so she said. I've never experienced that kind of love, so I wouldn't know." Chanyeol looks away when he says this, but he continues, voice stronger and clearer than ever.

"I swore not to tell my parents for my sister's sake, but just a few days before we set off for Glacies, my mom encountered the pair embracing in the cellar. Naturally, she freaked out and had the king banish him from Ignis, before setting my sister off for your courting ball. My mom couldn't understand why my sister would pick a lowly servant over any of the higher-ups and princes she had introduced to her previously. Seoyeon was a complete mess, sobbing uncontrollably for days and locking herself in her room. I told you earlier that I accompanied my sister because of a few errands I had to run. That wasn't a total lie, but I mainly joined her to ensure that she wouldn't do anything rash."

Baekhyun lets out a breath he didn't know he was holding. "That explains a lot," he says. "Seoyeon seemed so distant today that I questioned her about it, but she only answered that her silence came from her nervousness to please me. Now that I know the true reason, it makes so much more sense." He places his arms on the counter and buries his head into the crook of his elbow. "She should be with him -- the farm hand, I mean, if she truly loves him. It's not fair that she's forced into this marriage when she could have absolute happiness somewhere else."

"It's not that easy, though, is it?"

"It's never that easy," Baekhyun laughs sadly, positioning his head so that he stares directly at Chanyeol's face. "I didn't ask for this ridiculous ballroom set-up either, you know. And call me a freak, but I'd rather choose who to love, before committing my life to spending it with them. I understand Seoyeon completely, because I... I sometimes don't want to follow my parents' expectations of me, either. Sometimes, I don't want to be normal."

"You don't have to be," Chanyeol says so softly, it's nearly inaudibly. "You don't like girls, do you, Baekhyun?"

Baekhyun can feel his knees begin to shake at Chanyeol's words, a cold sweat drenching his back. "I never said that!" he all but shouts, nearly falling off his stool in the process. Chanyeol launches forward and grabs his forearms, stabilizing him. His hands don't move, even when Baekhyun perches on the chair in perfect safety. The warmth of his palms seep into the Baekhyun's cold skin, causing him to shudder.

"I know you didn't."

"Then, why?"

Chanyeol is so close that Baekhyun can count his eyelashes, can see the laugh lines around the corners of his eyes, the faintest traces of freckles dotting his cheeks. "Well, I could tell during yesterday's dance that you weren't attracted to any of the women."

"So what? Maybe I was just exhausted from the entire event and wasn't up for dancing." Baekhyun isn't going down without some semblance of a fight.

"Maybe," Chanyeol says, that smirk returning to his face. "But I could mostly tell because of the way you look at me."

"The way, t-the way," Baekhyun stutters, wanting to slap himself when his voice comes out uneven. "That's a bit narcissistic, don't you think?"

"Not if it's true," Chanyeol breathes, eyelids half-lowered. The kitchen bar's few lights are dim, casting crooked shadows across the counter and barstools. In the past, Baekhyun had felt woozy from the muted lighting and the silence of the empty kitchen after hours. Now, he feels strange for an entirely different reason. Somehow, he finds himself tilting his head just so, his hands alighting slowly on Chanyeol's broad shoulders. "I think you got me," he whispers, just before he crashes their lips together.

They move slowly and melodically, tasting each other without rush, supported solely by the edge of the counter. Baekhyun's slender fingers snake into Chanyeol's grey locks, fastening themselves around soft tufts, pulling softly out of desperation. Chanyeol's large hands roam Baekhyun's back and spine, before sinking lower to knead the smaller's , eventually pulling him off his respective stool altogether and into his lap. Though the two are saturated with pure desire, they take their time, as Baekhyun bites the fullness of Chanyeol's lower lip, reveling in the low moan that tumbles from Chanyeol's throat. Baekhyun allows himself the pleasure of touching Chanyeol through his dress shirt, sliding his hands over the broad expanse of his chest, down across the taut muscles of his stomach, down, down, down, until his hands rest just above his crotch, toying with the belt buckle.

Chanyeol groans in response, lifting Baekhyun from the seat entirely, setting him down on the nearby chaise lounge. The two reattach and Baekhyun kisses Chanyeol so fervently he can feel bruises blooming across his mouth. It feels so good. Chanyeol mouths at Baekhyun's collarbones, red and purple at will, eliciting longing pants from Baekhyun's swollen lips. Chanyeol doesn't speak dirty -- he speaks so sickly sweetly into Baekhyun's ear that the latter flushes repeatedly at the compliments and the pet names, drinking in the raw tone of Chanyeol's voice. Chanyeol calls him "baby" and "love" and mutters sweet nothings about Baekhyun's hair and his hips and his "gorgeous hands". It's nothing like the smaller has ever experienced and he's so overwhelmed by the feeling of such affection, he doesn't realize he's crying until he tastes the saltiness between the kisses.

Chanyeol notices it too, and he sits up suddenly, frowning at his friend. "Baek, are you alright? Am I hurting you?"

"No, no," Baekhyun protests, swiping at his eyes with his wrist. He feels so hollow with the loss of Chanyeol's body. "I don't know why I'm crying. No, that, I know." He meets Chanyeol's eyes with a red-rimmed gaze, taking in his glowing cheeks and dilated pupils. "I've never felt this way before, Chanyeol. And I can't believe it's going to end tomorrow. I don't think I'll be able to handle it."

"Baekhyun." Chanyeol's voice is so warm, it hurts. "If it makes you feel any better, I think it'll be torture for me to see you with my sister, when I want you more than anything in the world." More than anything in the world. Baekhyun's heart pulses with the familiarity of those words and he reaches up to capture Chanyeol's mouth once more in one last, drawn-out kiss, turned saline from the tears streaming down his cheeks.

"Then let's not take this further, before we hurt ourselves any more than we already have."

 

---

The ride to Ignis is excruciatingly silent. Seoyeon sits in between her brother and Baekhyun, oblivious to the tense environment. Baekhyun keeps his eyes trained out the car window, watching the green fields pass by in a viridescent blur. He thinks about Seoyeon and her farm hand, about Chanyeol's pained expression when he had suggested they stay apart, about his future, about everything. No, he thinks, this is not the time to reminisce or wallow in misery over things you'll never have. You're about to meet Seoyeon's parents; you need to make a good first impression.

And Chanyeol's parents, his brain supplies unhelpfully. When the chauffeur announces their arrival, Baekhyun lets himself out of the door, emitting an enormous sigh into the open air. Then, he looks around. The Ignis palace stands taller than even Glacies', graced with twisting ironwork in the shape of flames and jade domed towers. Red silk banners flutter in the breeze, proudly displaying the crest of the city in vibrant golds. The group follows a deep blue granite path set into the ground to the massive iron doors of the palace, which the guards swing open upon their request. Blinding white quartz meets Baekhyun's eyes as he steps into the throne room. It takes a minute for him to adjust to the brightness of the space and when he does, he notices two regal figures resting on their respective thrones, draped in the familiar burgundy and black garb of Ignis royalty. He drops to one knee in front of them, murmuring a muffled, "Your majesties." 

Chapter ManagementAnd Chanyeol's parents, his brain supplies unhelpfully. When the chauffeur announces their arrival, Baekhyun lets himself out of the door, emitting an enormous sigh into the open air. Then, he looks around. The Ignis palace stands taller than even Glacies', graced with twisting ironk in the shape of flames and jade domed towers. Red silk banners flutter in the breeze, proudly displaying the crest of the city in vibrant golds. The group follows a deep blue granite path set into the ground to the massive iron doors of the palace, which the guards swing open upon

"You must be Byun Baekhyun of Glacies," the queen says, offering him a polished smile. She's tall and skinny, with catty eyes like Chanyeol's. "I'm very glad to hear that Seoyeon's taken to you and you to her."

"Ah, yes," Baekhyun replies awkwardly, still on bended knee. "I'm excited for our future together." As if on cue, Seoyeon takes her place beside him, lowering onto both of her knees as her skirts billow around her.

"Mother, father," she addresses them simply. "I'm happy to see that you're well."

"And I'm happy to see that you've chosen a worthy husband, Seoyeon," the queen muses. "Someone of your status." Seoyeon visibly flinches at this and without a second thought, Baekhyun reaches for her hand, entangling their fingers in pure sympathy. She glances at him, shocked, but squeezes his hand back thankfully.

The rest of the trip is relatively uneventful, filled mostly with minor wedding details and endless fittings. As the afternoon stretches along, Seoyeon seems increasingly miserable, throwing frequent glances toward the direction of the fields and valley, where the Ignis farmers spend their hours. Baekhyun's heart aches for her and her longing. She doesn't know the reason for his sudden care, but she smiles gratefully anyways when he provides words of comfort or a steady hand to hold.

All the while, Chanyeol flits in and out of the palace rooms, restless and with an ever-present crease between his brows. Baekhyun tries to catch his gaze several times, but the taller merely clenches his jaw, shaking his head in the smallest of movements. Hurt and anger remain scrawled on his face, as if written in big, bold print across his forehead. It's funny, Baekhyun muses, because it feels like the entire world has given up on him.

They return to Glacies before nightfall and Seoyeon drifts to sleep on his shoulder, eyes closed in the only peaceful expression she's donned the entire day. Chanyeol glimpses at their slumped figures from his seat beside his sister and exhales sharply, rotating his head to stare out of the window. His fists are clenched tightly, skin pulled white over his knuckles. Deflated, Baekhyun imagines this scene as a projection of the future, filled with three unsatisfied people, overwhelmed by desires of their own. Out of nostalgia and maybe some unintended masochism, he lets himself entertain the thought of riding alone with Chanyeol, laughing and smiling in carefree gaiety. Chanyeol would pull him close into his arms and Baekhyun would close his eyes to the dependable lull of the taller's heartbeat. The thought hurts so much, Baekhyun feels sick to his stomach.

It doesn't feel right like this, a day before his wedding to Seoyeon, walking on eggshells with her brother. He needs to fix this situation, if only to meet a friendly agreement with Chanyeol. He just needs some remnant of closure, some assurance that things will be alright.

The car pulls to a stop in front of the Glacies gates and Seoyeon is escorted to her room, balancing sleepily on a maid's arm. Chanyeol and Baekhyun are left standing in the cool night air, blinking awkwardly at each other under a canopy of unmasked stars. When Baekhyun tries to speak, to apologize, the words lodge in his throat, dry and unforgiving.

"Well, I should say good nigh--"

"No!" Baekhyun objects, blushing at the crack in his voice. "I mean, you should--will you, would you join me in my chambers for a second? I-I...I," he clears his throat, steeling himself mentally. "I need to talk to you about something."

Chanyeol lifts an eyebrow, but he follows Baekhyun silently to his room, a looming presence behind the smaller, walking in careful, measured footsteps. Baekhyun throws his door open in relief. He wasn't sure if Chanyeol would acquiesce, but here they are, settled upon separate chairs. It seems like so long ago when they were reveling in each other's touch, undisturbed by the rest of the world. With a fierce inhale, Baekhyun begins to speak.

"Chanyeol, I feel like I should apologize." Chanyeol stares unmovingly back at him, soundlessly bidding for him to continue. "It wasn't right for me to begin something I knew we could never finish. I know I've... I've hurt you and I'm sorry for that. I hope we can remain friends, despite the circumstances of the past few days."

"Baekhyun, have you ever thought with anything other than your head? Like your heart?" Baekhyun's head snaps up at this in surprise.

"What are you saying?"

"Look, I'm sorry too," Chanyeol mutters, fumbling with the tassels of his chair. "I reacted childishly to what you said last night. But in all honesty, your words didn't hurt me as much as your... your willingness to give up so easily. You let something die before it could even begin, Baekhyun."

"That was for our good!" Baekhyun protests, aghast at the other's inferences. "If we had let anything begin, we would have been miserable. It was just... not meant to be, Chanyeol. I think it was the best decision to maintain the spaces between us. We wouldn't be able to progress any further, so why hurt ourselves even more by trying?"

"You said it yourself, Baekhyun." Chanyeol's voice is pitched so low, it's nearly a whisper. "You said you had never experienced anything like what we felt yesterday night. I felt it too, you know."

Baekhyun droops on his seat, feeling absolutely ing exhausted. "Chanyeol, I... why are you so brutally honest? It makes this so much harder, because yes, hell, I want this too, but how? How could this ever become something tangible? How could this ever work?"

"We could run away." Now, Baekhyun feels wide awake.

"What? You're joking," Baekhyun accuses, narrowing his eyes, but Chanyeol doesn't grin in return. He looks perfectly solelmn, mouth set in a straight line. "You can't be serious."

"I don't want to pressure you at all in your decisions, but yeah, I've never been more serious about anything in my life."

"B-but what about the wedding? And our parents? Seoyeon? What about Seoyeon?" Baekhyun teeters off his chair, landing in a frazzled heap on the carpeted floor. Chanyeol smiles sadly at him, the kind that lifts the corners of his mouth but doesn't reach his eyes.

"Seoyeon has plans of her own," Chanyeol admits quietly. "Don't take this the wrong the way, Baekhyun, but she was planning to leave before the wedding to run away with the farm hand."

Something sour rises in Baekhyun's throat as he takes in the taller's words, despite his platonic feelings for his fiancee. "She was going to jilt me?" he laughs bitterly, thinking only of his father's livid face. "I'm not sure what to say."

"You don't have to comment anything. Just give me an answer." Chanyeol sighs, running a hand through his hair, leaving it tousled. In the back of his distracted mind, Baekhyun aches to weave his own fingers through the dark grey tresses, but now, he can only look on longingly. There's a pregnant pause before he speaks up.

"I want to," he says, his voice cracking on his words. "You know I want to, but I don't see how. My father will kill me and we won't have anywhere to go and I'm not sure if I could even--"

In one swift motion, Chanyeol grabs his hand, emanating pure warmth as he claps his fingers gently. "You're thinking with your head again, Byun Baekhyun. You can try to think your way through your feelings all you want, but sometimes, you just need to let go. I'm not saying you should approach this irrationally, but... don't let your fears control you either." He lets go of Baekhyun's hand, leaving heat lingering like a final goodbye. "I'll give you until dawn to make your decision. If you end up choosing to come with me, meet me at the courtyard. If you don't show up... I'll support you nonetheless in the path you end up taking, as a friend. I don't mean to set an ultimatum, but we both know time is running out. Good night, Baekhyun."

And with that, Chanyeol walks out of the room, shoulders squared and head held high, striking a regal silhouette against the candlelit walls.

Baekhyun can't breathe at first. Then he panics, breathing too quickly into his pillow. He isn't sure what to feel, what to choose, what to do. He knows he won't get Seoyeon either way, which in the end, appears as a blessing in disguise. But he isn't sure about Chanyeol. Baekhyun rolls across his duvet, hands splayed against his eyes in utter agony. "I don't know what to do!" he yells at his ceiling, blinking furious tears out of his eyes. Just to get out his frustruation, he throws a wild punch at his pillow, punctuating each word. "I. am. so. confused! I don't want to disappoint my parents, but I've never felt so liberated, so at home with Chanyeol. And even if I end up marrying a princess like my father so desires, I'll die with my regrets strapped to my back. I know what I want to do, of course I do, I know it better than anything else. Because whether I think with my head or with my heart, I'm only sure of one thing... I-I think I love him!" Baekhyun shivers, feeling a delicious chill seep through his bones. He strikes his hands against the air in one last exclamation and watches in astonishment as frost leaps from his fingertips, plastering the entire ceiling in glittering patterns. He falls back onto his bed with a thump, hair sticking to his forehead with sweat.

"I love him," he repeats weakly, letting the words sink in. "I love him! I love Chanyeol!" Suddenly, he's laughing almost manically. " what society or my father wants of me. I know what I want and I know how to get it. Man, I'm ing gay!" He chuckles again, tears of mirth staining his cheeks. He falls asleep like this, a wide smile stretched across his face, the first sign of happiness he's experienced in a good while.

At dawn, he's more nervous than the moment before his courting ball, only a few days prior. He binds his hands together in terror as he approaches the palace courtyard, a million what-ifs running through his head on repeat. Swallowing, he breaks through the early morning fog to find Chanyeol, with his arms outstretched and a huge smile lighting up his entire face.

"Hello, Baek."

There isn't anything much sweeter than being in the arms of someone you dearly love, Baekhyun decides, as he buries his face in Chanyeol's shoulder. Chanyeol's hands, as always, are warm as they rest on the smaller's waist, tracing circles over hipbones in adoration. When they break their embrace, Chanyeol's face is so bright with joy, his eyes crinkling to accommodate his smile. "This one's on you," Baekhyun warns. "If this doesn't work out, I'm blaming you, alright?"

"You can blame me all you want," Chanyeol responds, keeping his eyes trained on Baekhyun. "As long as you stay close to me."

"That's cheesy," Baekhyun scoffs, but he feels his cheeks warming up nevertheless. "When are we planning to leave the premises?"

Chanyeol's brow dips slightly. "As soon as possible, or at least before the majority of the castle wakes up. You'll need to pack your things quietly and quickly -- try to pack minimally. I'll get a chauffeur so we can drive to Ligna. I have close friends there who would be glad to take us in until we can establish a home by ourselves."

"And after that?"

"After that," Chanyeol muses, pressing a chaste kiss to Baekhyun's knuckle. "We can form a petition to the capitol to begin a new kingdom. I was thinking about starting a division of Aquea... it's only fitting since fire and ice make..." Chanyeol wiggles his eyebrows like he's comedic gold or something.

"Yes, water, I get it," Baekhyun says, rolling his eyes. "One step at a time, right? We'll get through this." He turns around to return to his chambers to pack his belongings. Somehow, his heart feels lighter and freer than ever before, despite the nervous sensation deep in his gut.

"Oh, and Baekhyun?" Chanyeol calls. "Write your parents a letter or something. They do care about you, deep down, I know they do."

 

---

 

It's nearly eight in the morning when they speed off, the pearly gates of Glacies shrinking with every foot traveled. Baekhyun rests his head in Chanyeol's lap, laughing contentedly when the latter cracks a terrible joke. Seoyeon is long gone on her own journey with her lover, a pretty memory to be kept, not followed. The sun shines intensely overhead, casting a scintillating glow on the scenery. Baekhyun's never felt peace like this before.

"I did what you instructed," he says, reaching an arm out to brush away a stray hair from Chanyeol's handsome face.

"I've demanded a lot of you in the past," Chanyeol replies. "You'll have to elaborate."

"I thought with my heart for once. I think I was too scared to admit I had actual, real feelings for you, not just to you, but to myself as well. I've always been afraid of being vulnerable, of opening myself up to someone wholly, so I'm sorry for my obstinance. I was afraid."

"Baek, you don't need to apologize for anything. I realize I pushed you too hard, so if there's anyone saying sorry, it should be me. I wanted you so badly, I hardly thought about your own feelings."

"Well, I needed that push," Baekhyun admits, flashing a slow smile. "And I don't regret anything."

"Um, listen..." Chanyeol says, clearing his throat. He looks the other square in the eye and his Adam's apple bobs as he swallows. Baekhyun follows its motion hungrily. "Baekhyun, you don't need to return this until you're ready, and I don't want you to feel forced to think the same way, but I need you let you know. I-I...I think I love you."

"Chanyeol, I think this is one instance where I'm one step ahead of you."

 

---

 

Dear Mother and Father,

By the time you read this letter, I will have been gone. Don't look for me--I'm safe and happy. I should have explained everything beforehand to you, and for that I apologize. I'm not the golden son you want and I don't believe I ever will be. You see, people fall in love unconventionally, but that's expected, since love works in strange ways. I didn't love Seoyeon and she didn't love me. She loved an Ignis farm hand and her utmost pursuit of happiness led her to begin a new chapter of life with him. Simply put, I love her brother, and in my own utmost pursuit of happiness, I decided to continue my life with him. I don't expect you to accept, or even understand this. I'm sorry I couldn't be what you wanted me to be, but I couldn't give up myself to become something I wasn't. Whatever you feel about me, I just want you to know that I love you both dearly and sincerely hope you are doing well.

Dear Joonmyun,

I'm sorry. I probably gave you a heart attack by leaving. Thank you for being my best friend and companion in everything, even when I crashed my first car into your room window (It was an accident, I swear it was.) Don't worry about me -- I'm happier than I've ever been. I hope you find that same happiness sometime soon. Make sure to keep Sehun in line. I'll miss you terribly.

Dear Sehun,

Someone told me to think with your heart as well as your brain. Don't make the same mistakes as I did, kid, but follow what you know is right. Be good. I'll miss you.

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Comments

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hallyu_chan
#1
Chapter 1: So refreshing
The flirting damn, chanyeol would smirk my way and I would faint
nabmyn-ssi #2
Ooohhh no wonder you writing style is familiar,, i once read this on ao3 and still re-reading this bc quality!!! Now I'll anticipate your works from now on!!!
QbananaQ
#3
Chapter 1: This is so beautiful. I really like how you portray their characters. How they wanted to breakfree from the royalty's norms and all. Wow, this is really love. And oh. The letter made me cry ;(
Blushed
#4
Chapter 1: I LOVE THIS SOOO MUCH I cant even think of the things I want to say because this left me speechless I like how you wrote chanbaek's character!!!
DASHluv #5
This was beautiful I loved it so much!!! I just wish we could see how their lives were like after this
VIPtheExotic
#6
Chapter 1: Love this very much!!! Their love story is simple and innocent, yet so beatiful and pure. Really cant contain my feelings rn...
byunberrypark #7
Chapter 1: Damn this story. Damn. Omg firstly, I loved the way they fell in love so naturally, its like they expected it but its so unexpected xD (Lord that was contradicting) Okay all the fluff and the googly eyes and the incessant flailing about at the cute if this story, I learnt so much from this.
Recently, Ive been going about my life very mundanely, stick to a set of the same rules and the same school routine. As this is the final year for me, its extremely life energy draining for me, I cannot imagine hoe I would survive college oh dear god. But this story got me seeing the other side of the greenery. It spoke to me how we should learn hoe to think with how hearts sometimes, why should we make ourselves miserable? Why woukd I do something that makes me unhappy? I saw the way baekhyun and chanyeol completing each other perfectly, and finding their own happiness. I would love for everyone to find their own happiness one day, be it in a lover, a hobby or something you've accomplish. This is the true meaning of life isnt it? ;3 So thank you for the great read, would love to read more chanbaek from you in the future~ Have a great day!
xxxyenxxx #8
Chapter 1: I love this so much, it reminds of those fairytale stories where the two main characters find "true love" and the love is so powerful that they can do anything to be together
Plus it's Baekyeol, I can love it for just that reason haha
Thank you for writing x)