I don’t know why I keep coming back, there is nothing special or significant that would make me want to come back, maybe I like the peace and quiet it brings my mind and body. At home I get almost none of that, looking after a father that doesn’t work and is drunk practically every hour of every day and two disrespectful siblings that treat me like a live-in maid.
I resorted to finding places away from home, away from them where I can breathe, my own fortress of solitude. I found a place but the constant clink of the cash registers is something to be desired. For a store warehouse that has mostly everything, I find myself always in the book section, spending hours just standing and reading.
 

I figured that the staff wouldn’t like me staying there for long periods of time but they never bothered me or told me to leave, it was as if they understood my need to be alone, the fact that they were all guys had me even more surprised. Okay, it was a lie when I said there was nothing special here. In all my 23 years of living, I have never seen this many handsome guys in one place before.
 

They all look familiar to me but I can’t put my finger on it, I swear I have seen them before but the where and how is somewhat eluding me at the moment. Two of them walk past me, the tall one who always has a big smile and the one that wears eyeliner a lot. They don’t wear name tags which is weird but I don’t question it. I should wear a name tag since people tend to forget my name, its only three letters.
 

They both wave in acknowledgment as they walk past and another tall guy is following them, I think he is new coz I’ve never seen him before. I waved at him only to get glared at so I promptly went back to reading my book. I always leave just before closing time, I wrap my scarf around my neck and button my jacket up before leaving the store.
The falling snow had me in awe with how beautiful it looked with the night sky as the back drop, the street is bare, the tall street lights flicker providing a minimum amount of light as I walk in the direction of home.  My feet taking hesitant steps to the place I didn’t want to be at, I never used to feel like this but when a parent passes away, the once whole peaceful dynamic of a household can change. 
 

The last time my siblings and I ever saw our mom was the day of second semester test finals, I was on my third year of high school while my younger siblings both started their first year of high school. We all coincidently slept in and our mom ended up driving us to school, waving goodbye at the gate, we had no idea that would be the last time we ever saw her. 
Seeing the house in the distance filled me with dread, there was no warmth in our house anymore, I try to be a mother figure for my siblings but they refuse at the first sign of help. My father is no better and would rather stew in his own vomit all day than have me clean him up, my sister says it’s because I remind him of mum that he acts that way.
I enter the house and see my father in the exact same position I left him in, in his recliner chair watching the sports channel, my siblings have obviously decided to go out partying on a school night since they are not here. I put my bag down, taking my jacket and scarf off before heading to the kitchen.
 

“Have you eaten yet?” I asked him even though he never replies when I do, it’s like talking to a brick wall. I always take the silence as a no and end up fixing him a sandwich before heading upstairs to my room to change.  Throwing my dirty clothes in the hamper beside the door, I change into my pajamas, turn off the light and just lay on my bed. 
I’m still awake when my father decides to sleep, the noise disappears as the television is shut off and its silence in the house except the hum of the refrigerator, which I can hear from my room. The house isn’t soundproof so I easily heard my brother and sister come home, not caring if anyone is sleeping, talking about who they hooked up with at the party they went to this evening. I sighed, I’m the oldest sibling and yet I can’t do anything, they never listen to me when I try to tell them stuff, my pleas for them to quit drinking and smoking and to focus on school fall on deaf ears. 
 

I turn on my side, the moonlight streaming in through the window illuminates my room with enough light that  I can just make out the portrait of my mother I have on my duchess, I feel like she would be disappointed in me, if she was here right now. My mother always knew what to do with my siblings while I’m as clueless as a chicken with its head cut off, I wish I could have talked to her one last time. I should have paid more attention to her instead of being so focused on getting good grades, instead of shutting her out all the time. I close my eyes and let myself fall asleep, my mind going through memories of my mother and that was the first night I ever dreamed about her since she died. 
~
In the mornings, I’m always up first.
The routine is always the same, make breakfast, do the laundry, clean the house and this is all before I go to work. I’m out of the house before any of them wake up, leaving a note on the fridge with things that have to be done today but I know they won’t get done. Breakfast used to be such a happy time, mother would always makes strawberry pancakes and waffles instead of the traditional Korean breakfast. Now breakfast is just a reminder of what used to be and would never be again, no matter how hard I tried to make it happen. 
 

I shiver as I’m walking my usual path to work, every house in the neighbourhood beginning to show signs of waking up, the milkman and mailman wave as they walk past me going about their duties for the day. It takes me ten minutes to walk to the little convenience store where I work, the manager greets me with a nod and head to the back to change into my uniform. 
The morning is practically dead except for the elderly that come only for the free newspaper, the manager says he is heading out on an errand and for me to restock the shelves. I do a quick lap around the store, nothing needs to be replaced or anything so I go back to the register, patiently wishing for customers to show up.
 

“Yo!!! Noona!!” A voice calls out, I look up and let out a sigh. 
 

In our neighbourhood, there is a group of high schoolers who consider themselves a gang but really are just a bunch of trouble makers. They have a permanent jail cell reserved just for them at the local police station, everyone in the neighbourhood avoids them like the plague and then there is me, who is kind of like the conscience for the group, I didn’t ask for the title, it just kind of happened. 
“You shouldn’t you guys be in school, Park Seo Joon, Kim Woo Bin?” I questioned, looking at the two boys in front of the group. 
“Aww, come on Yun-noona! School is boring.” Seo Joon says with a pout and fluttering his insanely long eyelashes. 
I scoff at his actions, he’s cute but not that cute. 
“I don’t care if it’s boring, I would have killed to have finished school. Don’t take your education for granted and get to school before I call them and drag you there myself.” I told them, making a move to grab my phone from my pocket. Woo Bin rushes over to me and puts an arm around me.
“Okay, Noona. We’ll go, just don’t call them. Please.” He pleads
“You better be at school, I’ll be there this afternoon anyway for a parent/teacher meeting so I’ll be looking for you.” I said to Seo Joon, my lips pursed in a thin line. 
“Min and Hyuk giving you grief again?” He asked me with a knowing expression on his face. 
“What do you mean again? They never stopped.” Woo Bin commented giving me a sympathetic look.
“It’s okay boys, you guys go and I’ll see this afternoon.” I gave them a small smile and ushered them out of the store, watching them walk up the street and out of sight. 
~
“What do you mean they haven’t been attending school?” I asked, shooting up from my chair, my eyes wide. The principal clears his throat before speaking again.
 

“From our attendance records, Min and Hyuk haven’t been at school for two months but the thing is Yun-shi, they gave their teachers a note that was signed by you, giving them permission not to attend. That’s why it took so long to speak to you because we thought you knew about but judging by your reaction before, you are just as surprised as we were.” 
I couldn’t believe it, after everything I have done for them, the hours I worked to pay for their school fees ,my brother and sister have been lying to me, I knew they had gone off the rails with going out every night to parties but I didn’t know they were skipping school. Once I was outside the principal’s office, tears escaped, running down my cheeks. I walked out of the admin building and headed towards the front gate, my vision was blurry from the tears so I couldn’t see where I was going and bumped into something or someone.
“Sorry.” I automatically bowed.
“That’s okay, miss. Are you okay?” The stranger asked me. 
I quickly wipe away my tears before looking up at the stranger, both our eyes widened as we recognised each other. 
“I know you! You are the one who comes to the shop and just reads all the time.” He says flashing his bright smile, I only nod in confirmation.
“What’s your name? If you don’t mind me asking.” 
“Ummm, it’s Yun.” I told him 
“Yun? That’s a nice name. It’s nice to meet you Yun, I’m Chanyeol.” He extends out his hand and I extend mine out, shaking it. 
“I have to go, Chanyeol-shi. It was nice meeting you officially. Bye.” I said and took my leave, slowly making my way home wondering what the hell I was going to do about my siblings when I got there and praying that I can talk some sense into them.
 

I arrive home, about to open the door when it slams open and my siblings are before me with anger written all over their faces, I can hear my father yelling incoherently in the background but it was loud enough to be heard a few yards away. 
“What’s going on?” I asked cautiously, Min scoffed while Hyuk rolled his eyes.
“Don’t play dumb with us, you know exactly what you did.” The way Min was looking at me was like she wanted to kill me while Hyuk looked at like I was a bug beneath his shoe.
“I have no idea what you are talking about but let’s keep our voices down. The neighbourhood doesn’t need to know our problems,-“I was cut off by Hyuk slapping me across the face. I looked at him covering my burning cheek. 
“You blabbed on us to the principal and now we are expelled from school!”
I looked at them incredulously, he was talking as if the both of them liked going to school, if they liked school, they wouldn’t have skipped so much but I don’t dare say that out loud. 
“And on top of that, all our friends cut off contact with us, my older boyfriend dumped me, because of you! You have ruined us! Why couldn’t you just keep your mouth shut?!” Min screamed and shoved me so hard I fell backwards down the small flight of steps and landed on the cold hard concrete of the walkway. 
I groaned from the pain in my back, Min and Hyuk smirked and went inside, leaving me outside in the cold, I sat up and slowly got up only to be shoved again, this time by my father. I looked up at him, he was swaying and unsteady on his feet, meaning he was drunk and he looked pissed off. 
“Dad, what are you doing?” I asked, swallowing down the fear that was rising in my throat.
“Is it true, you ?” He said, slurring his words, his bloodshot eyes were unfocused as he stared at me.
“What are you talking about?” 
“Are you stealing from me?!” He yelled, his face going red.
“What?! Who told you that?!” I asked, eyes widened and in a panicked voice. He struck me with the beer bottle he was holding, it broke when it impacted with my head, breaking into tiny pieces. I touched my head and felt warm liquid running down my hand. 
“So it is true!” He yelled again, this time kicking me repeatedly in the stomach. Every hit was a like a stab to the heart, out of the corner of my eye, I saw Min and Hyuk standing on the veranda with triumphant smirks on their faces. So my own siblings turned against me and my father was beating me because of the lies they’ve told him, everything that I did trying to keep this family together had been for naught. Tears ran down my cheeks, my body was going numb although the pain wasn’t subsiding, I prayed he would stop soon or I would lose consciousness.
 

I’m sorry, Mother. Someone save me, please………
 

A minute later my prayers were answered as I heard several voices and sirens, multiple footsteps sounded on the concrete, the voices were familiar as they spoke but I couldn’t think of anything as everything went black and I slipped into the world of blissful silence.