The afternoon sun floods Jinwoo’s room as he sits on his bed with his back against the headboard. His hands are both occupied; one holding a book that he recently purchased, the other carding through Seungyoon’s hair as said boy is sleeping soundly on his lap, hugging the deer plushie he gifted to Jinwoo against his chest. 

A small sound, close to a whimper, catches Jinwoo’s attention. He looks down to find the younger’s eyebrows furrowed and his plump lips angrily muttering incoherent words. A little worried for his boyfriend, the elder leans down and kisses the middle of Seungyoon’s forehead, hoping the small action can wake him from his bad dream. But instead of rousing, the younger settles further into Jinwoo’s lap, eyebrows smoothing and body going back to its former relaxed state. Jinwoo smiles, finger tracing the lines of Seungyoon’s eyebrows before he returns to his book, a low hum of contentment escaping him as the younger snores lightly below him.

ㅇㅈㅇ

It had been rocky, the start of their relationship. Seungyoon didn’t accept Jinwoo’s confession easily, his soul running away from the elder the moment he said he loved him more than just a friend and more than just a brother. The younger knew that Jinwoo preferred being with boys than girls but the elder’s ual orientation never changed their friendship. Seungyoon didn’t find any need to do so, Jinwoo was a good person, someone he had grown up with and shared his dreams with. He wasn’t going to lose such an important person over a petty matter. But when the elder poured out his feelings for Seungyoon after the younger’s winter recital, he had to step back and think about the elder’s words.

“I’ve loved you the moment I met you.” Jinwoo didn’t dare look at his eyes back then and Seungyoon could feel how nervous he was, visibly shaking even if they were indoors. “I thought I’d be able to forget my feelings for you and accept that we can only be friends but,” the elder bit his lip, the flush on his cheeks may or may not have been because of the cold, “but I couldn’t Seungyoon. I love you so much it hurts. It hurts that I have to keep it to myself.”  

Seungyoon was stunned, to say the least; unable to form words, even thoughts, as he watched Jinwoo squirm in place because of his gaze. He could feel it, the elder was close to tearing up but he still tried his best, worrying his bottom lip as he trained his eyes to the ground. After minutes of silence, Jinwoo said his farewell, head bowed as he left and even apologizing for saying such words to the younger. Seungyoon stood frozen where the elder left him. He stayed there for a couple of minutes, gathering himself and his thoughts as the shock was still lingering on his body. Even as he shared a celebratory dinner with the orchestra, he couldn’t erase the memory of Jinwoo’s teary eyes, pleading and hoping for acceptance.

Seungyoon avoided Jinwoo at all costs for the remaining two weeks of classes before the start of their winter break. He wanted to stay away from the elder, not because he wanted to outright reject him but because he wanted to find out for himself if he would be able to reciprocate his best friend’s feelings.

The first few days were quite tolerable, until Seungyoon found himself in an arcade with a bookstore adjacent to it. It was the same arcade that he used to frequent with Jinwoo on their spare time, emptying their pockets to play every possible game. He brought Yixing and Taehyun along with him but the two were never into playing arcade games and only tagged along because the cellist promised them dinner.

“If you had a fight with Jinwoo, make sure you fix it soon.” Yixing commented when they left the arcade, seeing a frown drawn on Seungyoon’s face unlike his previous visits to the place.

“We didn’t fight,” Seungyoon replied, looking more fascinated by the pavement than his conversation with his friends.

“Sure,” Taehyun drawled out, “because avoiding your best fri