Second story friends! Hope you enjoy and any mistakes or comments do let me know :)  

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The first time it happened was when Jiyong was young, still practically a kid and in the full immersion of his trainee experience.

Back then it was pretty much expected and understood by all working under YG’s label that in order to train talented kids to be the idols of the future that there would be a fair share of tears, tantrums and even fights. After all the few individual young stars lucky enough to be scouted by YG Entertainment were in most cases far from their homes and living in an environment unfamiliar to them. Indeed in most cases the trainees had never even been to Seoul before, additionally some didn’t even call Korean their first language.

This in mind President Yang, YG idols and mentors alike all made exceptions with regard to the frequent emotional swings the trainees went through. After all it happened to the best. Even the likes of Dong Youngbae, a very promising student, had stormed out of foreign language class before.

However there was one thing the President and the rest of the YG staff could count on when it came to the teen’s emotional episodes. This was, that trainee Kwon Jiyong would not be the one throwing a fit. Of this the head of YG’s label knew for definite.

To him, Jiyong was a hard working boy; a boy that didn’t quit and always did as he was told. The kid also had the makings of a great leader and if CEO Yang was certain of one thing it was that the boy did not let his emotions get involved with training. No, YG President was sure that Jiyong had taken his advice of saving all your emotions for the pillow.

After all, tears had no place at the studio and in the Kpop industry emotions were just a weakness that would prevent you from debuting. This President Yang had made clear to Jiyong long ago so that now several years on the talented boy had a reputation amongst his fellow trainees as the person to emulate and compete with. Indeed, Kwon Jiyong was YG’s ace; everyone knew it and CEO Yang planned to use him to his full potential when the time was right.

Still in the learning stages of his training however, now was not that time. In order for Jiyong to be YG’s future secret weapon, the kid had yet to develop more in confidence first. Something which unfortunately the other trainees jealousy and competitive attitude towards the boy made difficult.

The pressures forced upon Jiyong’s narrow shoulders both to remain on top at YG as well as make his parents proud was intense and often at times felt crushing, the results sending Ji into frequent anxious panic attacks.

Not that anyone knew of this of course, Jiyong had convinced himself early on in the training process to keep his emotions secret, after all, President had said tears were a weakness and unfit at the studio.

Jiyong had long concluded that his desperation to debut far outweighed all else. Ji would therefore not be halted in any way. If succeeding meant lying or hiding feelings and worries deep within his delicate heart, than he would and without a thought to his own emotional wellbeing.

With this in mind, on no particular day at YG studio’s, Jiyong along with the other trainees were being pushed through the paces of a SE7EN dance routine they must have done at least a hundred times over that evening. The strict dance coach Jin Cho watching on as the exhausted boys accurately went through the choreography again and again.

Despite all the trainees being good but uncomfortably hot and sweaty it was still clear to Cho that the kid Jiyong was the star candidate of the class. The occasional worried glance s of the other trainees shot towards the skinny boy were further confirmation of it as Jiyong continued to look only at his own reflection in the dance studio mirrors attempting to improve his technique with every step, much to the coaches satisfaction.

“Alright, five minutes for a break, go” the dance teacher yelled suddenly, calling an impromptu halt to the dance practice as all the breathless trainees broke formation and scampered around attempting to rest and refuel their tiered bodies.

Only Jiyong it seemed took his time.

Retaining the position of the last dance move he had been completing, the boy looked at his body in the mirror, silently judging the petite form looking back. Then with a sigh Jiyong adjusted his body angle slightly, only to glare unsatisfied at his thin frame before giving up and making his way towards the studio exit with the rest of the boys looking for a drink.

None of the other trainees really even looked at Ji as the young star walked YG’s familiar halls towards the busy refreshment area. In fact it was really only once the shy boy got to the water fountain, located at the end of the corridor that anyone actually paid him any attention and in that case it was the unwanted kind.

“Oh golden boy really is human after all then , I mean look guys he does drink water like the rest of us” a taller, older trainee called Zelo sneered as he watched Jiyong drink, a disgusted look upon his face, his friends hissing and laughing alongside.

Indeed, unfazed by the insult Jiyong continued to drink carefully. Having long become immune to his fellow trainee’s abusive words and currently too drained to care the young boy just wanted to turn round, walk back up the corridor, finish the dance practice and go home.

It seemed, however, that Zelo had other plans and if the way he and his gang pushed themselves up off the corridor floor in order to crowd and follow Jiyong meant anything, then it was that they had not appreciated being ignored and were now spoiling for a fight. A very one sided and unfair fight Jiyong thought as the boy started to feel uneasy with the gangs interest in him.

“Don’t walk away from me when I’m talking to you Kwon” Zelo suddenly growled, grabbing Jiyong’s baggy black t-shirt and slamming him hard into the corridor wall, one hand fisted over his shoulder even as the older boy leaned in closer to emphasis his point.

“I am your hyung after all and deserve your respect, right” Zelo almost whispered into the smaller trainees ear as Jiyong turned both his head and large doe eyes to the side looking up and away from Zelo’s face, a blatant sign of disrespect.

“Right” the three or four other older trainees who made up Zelo’s little group chorused together making their point by surrounding Jiyong and forcing his head and neck at a painful angle back down in order to get him to look Zelo in the eyes.

“Right” Zelo spat with a dangerous undertone in his voice as his nose almost touched Jiyong’s in anticipation of a response, their position too intimate for Ji’s liking.

“Yes…hyung” Jiyong finally breathed out through perfect clenched teeth wishing to avoid conflict and simply furious with the desire for the older boys to get their hands off him.

“Good dongsaeng” Zelo let out a forced fake laugh as he momentarily tightened his rough grip on Jiyong’s shirt, inadvertently choking Ji even as the older trainee harshly slapped the slim boy’s soft, hollow cheek in mock praise at his answer.

Slowly releasing the tight hold and peeling away the weight of his body that had been crushing Jiyong into the wall, Zelo finally stepped back out of the Kwon kids personal space.

“Come on then boys lets go, he’s not even worth it” the stronger trainee called harshly as he turned and casually made his way down the corridor.

Zelo’s gang, seeming slightly disappointed with the fun they’d had but still not willing to disobey their leader , soon followed after their hyung.

The group’s unexpected departure left Jiyong still defensively hunched up against the corridors brick wall trying to get his breath back and control the raging panic attack he could feel churning just beneath the surface of his skin.

After a moment of fighting the inevitable panic however, Jiyong began to shake violently.

“You should come to Ji, wouldn’t want to be late for coach Cho” Lee the last boy from the older group, now at the entrance door to the practice dance studio, suddenly called back to Jiyong in a mock friendly tone as the younger still had yet to move from the hard wall.

Jiyong now trapped in his own world continued to stare his wide fiery eyes straight ahead at nothing.

After only a minute and with no reaction forth coming, Lee gave a final snort of pathetic amusement over the precious golden boy before turning and loudly entering the practice room re-joining the rest of his rough gang.

With most of the other trainees by now having already re-entered the studio a subconscious part of Jiyong’s conscious told him to not be late and get to class.

“hhugghhh” Jiyong let out a small slightly choked down gasp past the lump in his throat as it finally seemed to register that the young trainee had been left alone in the corridor and should move.

The result of this revelation was that Ji subconsciously moved his hands up to circle his neck now that the airway was no longer cut off. Legs then giving out, forced Jiyong to slide harshly down the wall to the floor even as he rubbed his chest and pultruding collar bones.

At this rate he wasn’t getting to rehearsal any time soon that was for sure, Jiyong’s anxiety would take care of that.

“uggh…gosh…uh” a breathy strangled whine escaped Jiyong, too high pitched for his normal voice, even as the severity of what took place now dawned on the YG prodigy.

Despite others jealousy no one had ever laid hands on him before, not even Zelo’s lot. What just happened was new and it suddenly terrified Jiyong to think that this treatment might become a normal thing for Zelo’s gang.

“ohh my gosh, no no no no noooo, (sniffle) what do I do??!”  Jiyong’s voice croaked out load in panic as his brain rushed a mile a minute trying to think of solutions to his inevitably violent future.

I can’t let this happen again it’ll become normal and I’ll be afraid of going to my own training studio! But your already are afraid of your own training studio right? Zelo’s gang’s abusive words traumatized you didn’t they? Admit it, that’s why your panicking now, all their hate screwed something up inside you right? Nothing’s going to change that now!

I I could, should tell YG!... but I can’t tell YG! Emotions aren’t for the company remember. Then what do I do? I have to tell, it can’t be a secret or it’ll get worse, Zelo’ll kill me!…or…or… should it be a secret?, my secret deep in my heart? After all I don’t want to jeopardize my chance at debuting?...right? and this…they would want that wouldn’t they Zelo’s stupid crew would love to stop me from becoming what they’ll never be!

We’ll I’ll show them and… and screw what they do to me! I can…I can take it…it’ll be all worth the pain…in the end…right...right?