We have been best friends since 5 years ago until now. It was since primary school and now we're in secondary school.. We have about one year to spend together here in this school.

 

I'm happy when she's around. I always laugh while I'm with her. She always tease me but I don't mind about it and I love that..

 

She has many attractions that I found. My friends said that she is pretty and cute girl as she actually has the fair white skin. She is a smart student as she always in top 10 in every exams. She is a happy-go-lucky, fun and interesting girl to be explore about her.

 

My friends also said that maybe she likes me. But, I don't know.

If it's true, then it'll be my pleasure.. 

 

I guess I know everything about her... But.

 

Her heart.

 

She doesn't share anything about what types of boy she likes... And she also does not expose her feelings to me. She doesn't show any interesting about that matter. I don't know if she actually doesn't has one. But as a girl in our age, of course she had someone in her mind.

Who would it be? That guy must be so lucky to have her thinking about him.

 

"Sehun-ah.. What are you doing there?? Come here." she asked me to go to her place. She is going to go to the canteen... I get the permission to get out from class earlier than her today, so I stop at the pond on the way to the canteen. And that's why she found me here.

"Come on! Let's get our stomach full as I'm really hungry. I don't take my breakfast today and that's why my stomach is asking for food.. Can you hear the sound from my stomach??" she point at her stomach while showing her cute face... Argh... I flutter again. We have been like this for many times but I still flutter.

"Hiya... I'm a boy, okay?" I cover her position.. Actually I don't mind but it just I don't want anybody to see our scene here like this. It is only for me... Her cute face.

"Okay. Araso.. Hmm.. Let's go." she holds my wrist and bring me to the canteen.

And I just let it be..

 

...

 

It's already 2:30 pm. Where is she? I'm waiting here about 45 minutes after school time.This makes me worry. Is she okay?

"M-mianhae.. I'm late. The teacher allow us to leave just now.. She expands our time.."

I relieve from being worried after I see her face in front of me right now. I don't know how to react. And... 

I bring her close to me and I hug her for the first time.

It is today.

My hands are on her shoulder. And she places her hands around my waist. She return it and hug me as well.

And I just realised that I'm not have this feeling alone but we both have.

I cry at that moment after realising it.. How stupid am I???

 

"Waeyo?? Are you worry if something bad happen to me?" she tap on my back, trying to calm me.

"Hmm.." I reply.

"Since when?"

"It is since we met."

"Why don't you tell me?"

"I'm afraid.. I afraid and shame if you reject me." I cry more.

"Why don't you try at least?"

"You never tell me what's in your heart and your love."

"I don't tell you that you are the one that I love. I thought you will discover about it. I'm too shame to tell you because you are the most wanted boy that every girls want to have." she hug me tightly this time and starts to cry.

"And I thought the same for you too... I'm sorry. I don't take the first step earlier. I really want to tell you but I have no courage. I'm sorry, (Y/N)-ah..." I get in my position to hold her tight in my embrace.

"Me too, Sehun-ah.. I'm sorry."

We hug with all the regrets that we found out for not telling the truth to each other.

 

I feel very sorry for her. 

Mianhae, (Y/N)-ah.

 

After a moment... (It's about 5 minutes after that.)

 

I lift up her head and wipe her tears..

This tears make me feel very sorry for not knowing and noticing it earlier.

We ended up like this to know each other feelings.

And. Fortunately. She feel the same way that I feel about her. I'm so glad.

She smiles to me. And look down to the ground.

I hold her shoulder and lift back her head up so that I can see her face.

I smile.

"So... Do you love me??" I asked while holding her chin so that her face will still looking at me.

"Hmm.." she avoid from our eyes meet.

"Since??"

"When I first know your name." her face turns red. She holds her face.. Trying to cover it.

She act differently right now. I flutter again for many times.

"Oh.. It's on our first meeting right?" I tease on her. I let go of my hands at her chin and hold her hands now.

"Hmmm.."

"(Y/N)-ah. Why are you acting like this. Just become how we used to be, huh?" 

She doesn't answer to it.

"Hiya!!" I pinch her nose.

She lift up her head.

"I love you" she said.

"I love you too, (Y/N)-ah" I reply.

and...

She kisses me.

She brings her hands on my shoulder. And continue around my neck.

I can feel her body close to me now.

I return it by wrapping my hands around her waist and push her close to me. We can feel the beat of our heart for each other at that time.

We continue kissing... And.

Suddenly... She broke the kiss and smiles to me trickly. She puts her hands down and look at me.

"Sehun-ah, why are blushing?? Hmm?? You tell me to act like always and that's what I want to do. I act like usual now... But. Why you act differently.. Let's become how we used to be... Can you??" she tease me while tap at my shoulder..

I get blushed and trying to act normally.

She run away from me while teasing me and I go after her...

 

 We are wondering what will happen next.

 

...

 

 

'Finally... 

I realised the need of being the one that confess first.

I realised not to be shame to tell your special one your true feeling. 

She doesn't know about it and YOU should let her to know by YOU making the first step.

It is a bit awkward if the girl tells you first.

YOU have to gain the courage to say it to her and be the one that makes the very first move.

She will be very grateful if you do it. 

Maybe she has the same feeling to you.

You still don't know what's in her heart unless you tell.'

 

 

20/1/2016, 9pm.

I write this at the night after I confess to her.

 

And I close my diary. I feel free and excited to continue the next day and after...

Especially, when she is around me.